The One

fakearms123

"When you meet the right person, you know it. You can't stop thinking about them. They're your best friend and your soulmate. You can't wait to spend the rest of your life with them. No one, and nothing else, can compare." - HIMYM

I have recently lost the "one" as they say, and I have fallen into a Chasing Amy sort of scenario.

Do you believe in the "one" and where is that special person right now?

TeddyTedson

The one got away

Never buy rope online.

smash

Amy must be quite special...

Hardonraging

fakearms123 wrote: »

"When you meet the right person, you know it. You can't stop thinking about them. They're your best friend and your soulmate. You can't wait to spend the rest of your life with them. No one, and nothing else, can compare." - HIMYM

I have recently lost the "one" as they say, and I have fallen into a Chasing Amy sort of scenario.

Do you believe in the "one" and where is that special person right now?

I think you know when you have a spark or connection with a person, but "things" dont always work out.. who knows she may come back to you in the future ... I know i'd like to think that's the case anyway ..

Feisar

There's lots of "ones" for everyone.

starbelgrade

I don't believe for one minute that there is only "one person" for everybody.

I think it's natural enough to want someone that you can spend the rest of your life with, but if that is for you then it's more of a case of finding someone - as opposed to the one - to do that with.

Jerrica

If they were the right person for you, you'd still be with them.

Dunno if there's "THE one", but there's usually one (or three) who tick more boxes than most.

TeddyTedson

A nice young wan

Bipolar Joe

Yes, I believe in the concept. Unfortunately, mine is a 52 year old tribe woman from Mali called Nfume. She doesn't even know I exist, but I know she's out there.

GranTorino

fakearms123 wrote: »

I have fallen into a Chasing Amy sort of scenario?

Finger cuffs eh?

I think most have experienced this sort of scenario where you kind of feel lost skipping from person to person trying to replace what you had or what you feel you need. Looking back now those "Chasing Amy" moments are/were the most character building moments I had relationship wise but didn't appreciate them enough at the time to enjoy them.

The devil is in the details so do tell. Let us live vicariously through you

Morag

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gaid72fqzNE

Krispie

fakearms123 wrote: »

" I have recently lost the "one" as they say, and I have fallen into a Chasing Amy sort of scenario.

Right, stop and think logically about it.....

Where is the last place you can remember having the "one" and work back from there? Can't have got far.. We'll all help you look too.... You'll Find it in the last place you look, doh:mad:

fakearms123

GranTorino wrote: »

Finger cuffs eh?

I think most have experienced this sort of scenario where you kind of feel lost skipping from person to person trying to replace what you had or what you feel you need. Looking back now those "Chasing Amy" moments are/were the most character building moments I had relationship wise but didn't appreciate them enough at the time to enjoy them.

The devil is in the details so do tell. Let us live vicariously through you

Not quite finger cuffs haha

but the details are so long and exhausting it would raise more questions than answers. A complicated sequence of unfortunate and regrettable events that I would alter if I had the power to do so.

Myrddin

Wait a second...they're fake hands

suicide_circus

Is that you, Laurence Fishburne ?

nbar12

Morag

nbar12 wrote: »

For Fuk Sake there's no need for that on a monday morning,
the day is grim enough, with the rain and it being the last monday
before the kids go back to school and the traffic gets mental.

nbar12

Sharrow wrote: »

For Fuk Sake there's no need for that on a monday morning,
the day is grim enough, with the rain and it being the last monday
before the kids go back to school and the traffic gets mental.

haha everyone knows the traffic is worse on a Tuesday!

GranTorino

fakearms123 wrote: »

Not quite finger cuffs haha

but the details are so long and exhausting it would raise more questions than answers. A complicated sequence of unfortunate and regrettable events that I would alter if I had the power to do so.

Gah, I named my daughter Alyssa. I hope she doesn't live up to her namesake

In all seriousness, the "One" is just a label invented to ruin polygamy. Fookin religion ruins everything good in this world.

Enjoy the time you have being on your own, eventually it'll be filled with someone you'll prolly grow to hate and children

westendgirlie

fakearms123 wrote: »

- HIMYM

eh

fakearms123

westendgirlie wrote: »

eh

How I Met Your Mother, I am a big fan.

4zn76tysfajdxp

fakearms123 wrote: »

"When you meet the right person, you know it. You can't stop thinking about them. They're your best friend and your soulmate. You can't wait to spend the rest of your life with them. No one, and nothing else, can compare." - HIMYM

How I Met Your Mother? Are people really pulling lines from that cynical, unfunny cancer of a program as examples of life-affirming quotes? God damn that show is terrible.

Where To

I haven't met the five or the six yet, never mind the one.

KKkitty

I didn't think there was "The One" til I met my now fiance. We originally met when I was 17 but it wasn't the right time for either of us. Fast forward 10 years and we met again and decided to start seeing each other. What's for you won't pass you OP.

starlings

it'd be handy to meet the last one first and save a lot of messing around with someones who turn out to be anyone's.

westendgirlie

I broke up with, who I thought was "The One". Felt like my whole life had ended yadda yadda yadda. Then I got a good seeing to and realised "The One" wasn't really any good at giving me one.

Sex really puts things into perspective

fakearms123

Serenity Flat Tribe wrote: »

How I Met Your Mother? Are people really pulling lines from that cynical, unfunny cancer of a program as examples of life-affirming quotes? God damn that show is terrible.

We all pull advice from strange and sometimes unorthodox places, doesn't make the advice any less powerful. Sure I got advice from an alcoholic homeless Russian man on success, he was in no way in a position of success but his advice helped me substantially in my career.

MHalberstram

westendgirlie wrote: »

I broke up with, who I thought was "The One". Felt like my whole life had ended yadda yadda yadda. Then I got a good seeing to and realised "The One" wasn't really any good at giving me one.

Sex really puts things into perspective

Go on...

KKkitty

fakearms123 wrote: »

Serenity Flat Tribe wrote: »

How I Met Your Mother? Are people really pulling lines from that cynical, unfunny cancer of a program as examples of life-affirming quotes? God damn that show is terrible.

We all pull advice from strange and sometimes unorthodox places, doesn't make the advice any less powerful. Sure I got advice from an alcoholic homeless Russian man on success, he was in no way in a position of success but his advice helped me substantially in my career.

HIMYM is legendary

Colmustard

Ahhhh is that a heart I hear breaking, you sap.

Plenty of fish in the sea, you will just have to settle for a herring.

Ted!

Two Beavers are better than one!

Loveshake

i met "the one" bout a year ago!well in my eyes its the one but a year later its still very casual and we only meet up every once in a while!they are very busy with work and when we are together things are great but there is no committment! what are yer thoughts?? should i give up on it or hang in there????

GranTorino

Loveshake wrote: »

should i give up on it or hang in there????

Ugh *spits

Lets get back to Chasing Amy, least there was a threesome in that. If given the option always quit. Its the path of less resistance and seems to work for electricity

fakearms123

Colmustard wrote: »

Ahhhh is that a heart I hear breaking, you sap.

Plenty of fish in the sea, you will just have to settle for a herring.

Hopefully I won't have to settle, settling sounds like a terrible life choice

nbar12

Loveshake wrote: »

i met "the one" bout a year ago!well in my eyes its the one but a year later its still very casual and we only meet up every once in a while!they are very busy with work and when we are together things are great but there is no committment! what are yer thoughts?? should i give up on it or hang in there????

you my friend, are in the "friends zone"

Colmustard

fakearms123 wrote: »

Hopefully I won't have to settle, settling sounds like a terrible life choice

Most people do, marriage for most just seems like a practical arrangement.

"Lucky is the man who finds true love".

tan11ie

No I don't believe in "The One" some people just settle for one and convince themselves that they're their soul mate. It's all fairytale ****e, we are programmed that way purely to reproduce.

Plenty of ones out there

Wacker The Attacker

fakearms123 wrote: »

"When you meet the right person, you know it. You can't stop thinking about them. They're your best friend and your soulmate. You can't wait to spend the rest of your life with them. No one, and nothing else, can compare." - HIMYM

I have recently lost the "one" as they say, and I have fallen into a Chasing Amy sort of scenario.

Do you believe in the "one" and where is that special person right now?

The she emigrates to Australia without telling you and is pregnant and engaged within 7 months of leaving

tan11ie

fakearms123 wrote: »

"When you meet the right person, you know it. You can't stop thinking about them. They're your best friend and your soulmate. You can't wait to spend the rest of your life with them. No one, and nothing else, can compare."

Honeymoon phase

LeeGal

I met the one, the way I felt about him was all consuming. We were together for about six passionate months. My heart was broken and I felt empty when it ended.

The next man I met was so different it was a bit of a rebound thing. We're together 16 years now. I am so relieved, I wouldn't trade what I have now for anything with the previous guy.

What (western) culture and society tell us we should feel with 'the one' is exactly what I felt and experienced with the first guy. What I have now is years of care and love, shared values, consistency and trust. It's rare that I think of the longing and fixation, the consuming of self by "us", the sheer emotional heights of that previous relationship as it could never have lasted, I would hate to have lived the last 16 years in such intensity. I have a whole life now not just him and my partner and I live our lives supporting each other not overwhelming each other.

So perhaps reject this idea of the one, it's fed to us by media and cultural norms. Life is just a one day at a time thing. Don't let who may come into your life today be overshadowed by something past that didn't work out. If u let it rule your life now - today - you'll still be hung up on them in years to come and wasting so many lovely opportunities that just didn't look or feel like 'the one' but could have been the best thing ever for you.

fakearms123

LeeGal wrote: »

I met the one, the way I felt about him was all consuming. We were together for about six passionate months. My heart was broken and I felt empty when it ended.

The next man I met was so different it was a bit of a rebound thing. We're together 16 years now. I am so relieved, I wouldn't trade what I have now for anything with the previous guy.

What (western) culture and society tell us we should feel with 'the one' is exactly what I felt and experienced with the first guy. What I have now is years of care and love, shared values, consistency and trust. It's rare that I think of the longing and fixation, the consuming of self by "us", the sheer emotional heights of that previous relationship as it could never have lasted, I would hate to have lived the last 16 years in such intensity. I have a whole life now not just him and my partner and I live our lives supporting each other not overwhelming each other.

So perhaps reject this idea of the one, it's fed to us by media and cultural norms. Life is just a one day at a time thing. Don't let who may come into your life today be overshadowed by something past that didn't work out. If u let it rule your life now - today - you'll still be hung up on them in years to come and wasting so many lovely opportunities that just didn't look or feel like 'the one' but could have been the best thing ever for you.

Not a bad first post!

JohnMarston

Im going to be a cynic and say no. There are too many people in the world for there to be only one person perfect for you

Colmustard

I met loads of "ones" and I fecked everyone of them.

I actually fancy someone ATM I would actually like a date, it seems mutual as well, its a a weird chemical thing. Its kind of strange, I feel like a teenager again.

I will probably do nothing about it, but if something happens I wont say no.

sunflower27

Bipolar Joe wrote: »

Yes, I believe in the concept. Unfortunately, mine is a 52 year old tribe woman from Mali called Nfume. She doesn't even know I exist, but I know she's out there.

She's on Facebook, what are you waiting for..... get in there....

sunflower27

Ted! wrote: »

Two Beavers are better than one!

Dream on....

AnonoBoy

Billions of people in the world and people believe there's "One" that they're destined to be with?

Bollocks.

There's loads of people that you'd be equally happy with.

You just don't know it.

In about three years you'll be happily with someone else and they'll be "The One" and you'll tell yourself that you although you thought the first girl was "The One" she wasn't, she was just there to teach you more about yourself and to teach you about pain and loss so you could become a better person and meet "The Real One."

That continues ad nauseum until you finally get sick of it and settle for one.

The Cool

Yeah, I think there is a "One" not in terms of that it's destiny for you to find each other and be together, but that when you meet someone who really just knocks your socks off then nobody you ever meet afterwards will compare to them. Had that experience with my fella, took for us to start seeing each other and then go our separate ways for us to see what we meant to each other.

minidazzler

Will 7 billion people in the world I struggle to believe that "The One" exists, especially since so many people just happen to have me "The One" who lived 5 miles away from them their whole lives.

I think there are a few thousand people that each of us could love and be attracted to if we were to give each a chance but we don't have the time for all that. I've met "The One" twice already, someone I'd happily spend forever and a day doing fcuk all with. And I imagine I'll meet a few more.

Though I have to say, the first "One" is the one they'll all be compared against and probably come up a little short.

AnonoBoy

minidazzler wrote: »

Will 7 billion people in the world I struggle to believe that "The One" exists, especially since so many people just happen to have me "The One" who lived 5 miles away from them their whole lives.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/18yearold-miraculously-finds-soulmate-in-hometown,375/

Colmustard

Originally Posted by minidazzler
Will 7 billion people in the world I struggle to believe that "The One" exists, especially since so many people just happen to have me "The One" who lived 5 miles away from them their whole lives.

Yeah kind of western romanticism propagated by the Brothers Grimm, Hans Christian Anderson, Shakespeare, Hollywood and the Disney corporation.

In most parts of the world today a women is bought, sold, taken and even in the west the father be it symbolically still gives the bride away. Romance for the vast majority of cases is only a modern western phenomena.

marshbaboon

The idea of "the one" implies fate, which is non existent. Life is a series of events based on chance, direction & desire.

While there is no "one", it is very possible that you meet someone who's highly compatible but it happens at the wrong stage in your life & due to chance you won't meet another person that compares to them.

In my lifetime I've only met one person I was truly compatible & happy with. I'd spend the rest of my life with her if I could and it's not a feeling that's going to go away any time soon, but sometimes things just don't work out & you have to keep stumbling along.