Are kids really worth all the hassle

floggg

So growing up as a kid, it's kind of assumed as inevitable that you will end up starting a family and raising a few sprogs of your own.

Lately though, I've been looking around at friends and colleagues starting families, and I'm starting to think to myself - being a parent looks like a load of ****e!

Seriously, apart from the inexplicable amounts of money they gobble up on you, they completely take over your whole life. You can kiss goodbye to a social life, friends, hobbies etc. You will end up spending most of your time working just so you can support the ingrates, and when you do have time off, it will invariably be spent cleaning up after them, or taking them some place etc.

I'm single and while I am doing ok financially, I'm not exactly flush. But there are plenty of people raising families on my wages. it horrifies me to think what I would have to give up to support another human being or two on my wage. Never mind the socialising and reasonable clothes, i'd be back to my colleg diet of koka noodle sandwiches!

So, are they really worth all the crap that goes with them?

Is there any parents here with buyer's remorse (or a strong grievance with the condom company)?

SugarCoat

one word - vasectomy

xDramaxQueenx

no, wiping someone elses ass? no thankss.

eth0

No they're not. They turn you into a right softie and prevent you from doing fun stuff

Kylo Ren

Yes.

They make fantastic drug mules.

Red Hand

eth0 wrote: »

No they're not. They turn you into a right softie and prevent you from doing fun stuff

And stick you in a home when you've retired.:) Something to look forward to, everybody.

AnonoBoy

If you don't have kids where else are you doing to get kidneys from when you're old?

Wompa1

What else are you going to do?

What's fun? Going out on the lock and getting the ride?

What about when you're in your 60's? Even when you are past your mid 30's doing that you are bordering on pervy.

leggo

They're probably worth the hassle just to avoid your family annoying you with questions and unsolicited advice/help on how to make you more 'normal'.

hairyprincess

I will loan you mine for a few weeks so you can get the full experience before you make any decisions.

No need to thank me, I feel it's my duty

racso1975

To a certain extent you could put forward that argument to a lot of things. A pet, a partner etc

I am a father of 2. I wont lie and say it is the most rewarding thing in the world blah blah blah

Look it it's like most things in life there are moments of genuine greatness and they make up for all the mundane things that come with being a parent

TeddyTedson

I actually fear this. Well not so much having kids, just that same life everyone seems to end up having. Working long hours to support family. Living in the same house doing the same ****ty 9-5 job with the same girlfriend for the rest of your life.
I'm probably being very insulting but it's just the way I personally feel about it.
Being stuck in on weekends looking after the kids. Jesus, I just could never imagine it.

I should be saying hopefully one day I'll want all that **** but I don't want it. Ever.

Perhaps it will all result in me dying alone as a miserable old bollocks with a whole lot of crazy.

Big Pussy Bonpensiero

The more you put into something the more you get out of it.

Akarinn

Child Benifits..

Defiantly worth the hassle...

hairyprincess

THFC wrote: »

The more you put into something the more you get out of it.

Yea that's what he said last night too :mad:

strobe

floggg wrote: »

Is there any parents here with buyer's remorse (or a strong grievance with the condom company)?

Plenty, but admitting it to anyone would mean admitting it to themselves, and people have a big, useful, guilt enducing and very sensitive trip switch that prevents themselves from doing that when it comes to situations they can't reverse similar to the one you present.

IMO etc...

Red Hand

AnonoBoy wrote: »

If you don't have kids where else are you doing to get kidneys from when you're old?

From the pigs that will be genetically modified to grow spare human organs, of course.

NegativeCreep

Nope, had to babysit one the other day when I was hungover ugh. They never stop talking! I'd have to give up drink if I had a kid and that's a no no in my book. I'm also incredibly greedy with money and there isn't a hope I'd have a kid just so it could drain me of every cent I hope to have

Motorist

strobe wrote: »

Plenty, but admitting it to anyone would mean admitting it to themselves, and people have a big, useful, guilt enducing and very sensitive trip switch that prevents themselves from doing that when it comes to situations they can't reverse similar to the one you present.

IMO etc...

Ive spoken to many parents who say having kids is absolute $hit. They long all day for 9pm when they get to spend a miserable two hours in peace.

They can't do anything, they are broke financially because of the kids, they have no lives anymore.

leggo

THFC wrote: »

The more you put into something the more you get out of it.

That sounds like a good way to get fat kids. Which means more money to feed them. I'm not sure I'm understanding your solution?

say_who_now?

floggg wrote: »

So growing up as a kid, it's kind of assumed as inevitable that you will end up starting a family and raising a few sprogs of your own.

Lately though, I've been looking around at friends and colleagues starting families, and I'm starting to think to myself - being a parent looks like a load of ****e!

Seriously, apart from the inexplicable amounts of money they gobble up on you, they completely take over your whole life. You can kiss goodbye to a social life, friends, hobbies etc. You will end up spending most of your time working just so you can support the ingrates, and when you do have time off, it will invariably be spent cleaning up after them, or taking them some place etc.

I'm single and while I am doing ok financially, I'm not exactly flush. But there are plenty of people raising families on my wages. it horrifies me to think what I would have to give up to support another human being or two on my wage. Never mind the socialising and reasonable clothes, i'd be back to my colleg diet of koka noodle sandwiches!

So, are they really worth all the crap that goes with them?

Is there any parents here with buyer's remorse (or a strong grievance with the condom company)?

And now just imagine if your parents had thought the same way you do before they had you- you wouldn't be here! You could ask the same question of any drain on your financial resources really, be it a car, a house, hell even getting married is a huge financial drain that some would ask is it worth it. As a parent myself of course there are times when I'm driven up the wall, but I'd never think I regret having children- for all the head wrecking they do, they do provide hours of LOL moments at the same time, and certainly I wouldn't say they had curbed my social life, or that they are half as bad as you make out. Like anything in life- if you plan and manage right, the rewards are awesome and you get out of it what you put in. Depending on what you consider an investment, be it financial or just time spent nurturing your investment, the dividends can be very rewarding indeed!

strobe

Motorist wrote: »

Ive spoken to many parents who say having kids is absolute $hit. They long all day for 9pm when they get to spend a miserable two hours in peace.

They can't do anything, they are broke financially because of the kids, they have no lives anymore.

I admire their honesty and pity their kids. It's a horrible atmosphere to grow up in and most people are nowhere near as good at hiding it as they think they are from their kids...

People having children they do not want or resent having is the cause of the majority of the human races problems imo.

AnonoBoy

Red Hand wrote: »

From the pigs that will be genetically modified to grow spare human organs, of course.

Tell me more......

keith16

It's not that much hassle. We still have friends, hobbies, a social life etc.

Your life doesn't end when you have kids.

I was reluctant like you OP, but I very much enjoy being a parent.

Swampy

Yes

Red Hand

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Tell me more......

We will take a pill the size of an anadin every day, but that will provide all nutritonal input.

Ryan Tubridy will become a body builder.

Boards will be beamed directly into the brain from the modem chips in our molars.

Maldesu

AnonoBoy wrote: »

If you don't have kids where else are you doing to get kidneys from when you're old?

Ya must be joking! Sure the wee shítes are hitting the booze by age 12 these days and have wrecked their kidneys. You're better just stealing the kidneys from a pioneer than going to the hassle of breeding a sprog and spending the cash on keeping it alive. Tis a bad investment.

Smidge

I'll be honest here.
There are moments of tremendous joy and times of utter heartbreak.
Combined with a side of monotony;)

karl_m

I personally do not want kids. Yes LOL moments are all well and good, but I'm an uncle twice over, and the LOL moments I get from them is enough. Seeing them grow up is all great too and you'll have such an amazing feeling of achievement too, but again, I'm a godfather, I'll have that anyway.

The financial strain,long hours,the pressure to provide in every way, putting them ahead of yourself, and constant attention seems too much for me.
There will be countless times that they will worry you in some way or that you'll doubt yourself in some way. You're social life will be hit hard, not completely gone, just less of it.

Probably many more reasons that I can't think of now, but hey, that's just me.

Cienciano

Your social life doesn't end. Well, it depends on what your social life is. If it's going to the pub all the time it'll take a hit. But not having kids because it will get in the way of going to the pub is a bit sad.
Weekends away take a bit more organisation. And when the kids are young a week holiday turns into hard work!
I'm lucky though, I have 4 or 5 different people I can get to babysit, if you don't have that it must be a lot harder.

furiousox

It's only $hit for the first ten years, after that it gets easier.

Motorist

keith16 wrote: »

It's not that much hassle. We still have friends, hobbies, a social life etc.

Your life doesn't end when you have kids.

I was reluctant like you OP, but I very much enjoy being a parent.

It seems there is some kind of evolutionary parenting mechanism which kicks in which tries to get you to overlook all the crap you have to deal with when you have a kid - it's kind of analogous to how the body will produce endorphins to block pain after a severe accident.

shedweller

Have kids myself and it is not easy. Mind you clubbing every fri and sat night got boring for me about 15 years ago. There just comes a point in your life when its not the be all end all etc.
And you dont want to leave it till you're 50 to have kids. Think about chasing a 5 year old when you are 55!! Or putting said child through college when you are 60 to 70. Fcuk that!
On the other end of the scale we have the teen parents. Want to be more or less the same age as your kids when you hit 50?
I dont know where the happy medium is but we are here to procreate and if we dont we die out. Do you want your genes to die out? Think about that. And think about what genes ARE proliferating today.

Cienciano

furiousox wrote: »

It's only $hit for the first ten years, after that it gets easier.

Then it gets easier for 2 years, then really difficult till you kick them out.

keith16

Motorist wrote: »

strobe wrote: »

Plenty, but admitting it to anyone would mean admitting it to themselves, and people have a big, useful, guilt enducing and very sensitive trip switch that prevents themselves from doing that when it comes to situations they can't reverse similar to the one you present.

IMO etc...

Ive spoken to many parents who say having kids is absolute $hit. They long all day for 9pm when they get to spend a miserable two hours in peace.

They can't do anything, they are broke financially because of the kids, they have no lives anymore.

Bigger fools if you ask me.

They are probably the same type of people who hate Monday's and count down the days to the weekend.

Living life in a soulless self-made rut.

Motorist

furiousox wrote: »

It's only $hit for the first ten years, after that it gets easier.

I imagine it's $hit for around 8 years (especially the first 2 or 3 when they can't use a toilet). You have a few years of peace, then they turn into absolute teenage cnuts for around 6 years, then you're free of them albeit badly bruised, down around €250,000 and you're now old and grey. Life is great.

http://www.independent.ie/business/personal-finance/surviving-the-recession/raising-children-can-be-extremely-expensive-1634030.html

SafeSurfer

Looks like a thinly disguised "I didn't have sex threads".

karl_m

shedweller wrote: »

Have kids myself and it is not easy. Mind you clubbing every fri and sat night got boring for me about 15 years ago. There just comes a point in your life when its not the be all end all etc.
And you dont want to leave it till you're 50 to have kids. Think about chasing a 5 year old when you are 55!! Or putting said child through college when you are 60 to 70. Fcuk that!
On the other end of the scale we have the teen parents. Want to be more or less the same age as your kids when you hit 50?
I dont know where the happy medium is but we are here to procreate and if we dont we die out. Do you want your genes to die out? Think about that. And think about what genes ARE proliferating today.

With 7 billion people on earth, there is no way we'll die out. There Is a case to say that at the moment, there are too many people alive for the current resources. I'm doing my bit, and my family genes and names live on.

I might donate sperm though, that'll be cool. :eek:

keith16

Motorist wrote: »

keith16 wrote: »

It's not that much hassle. We still have friends, hobbies, a social life etc.

Your life doesn't end when you have kids.

I was reluctant like you OP, but I very much enjoy being a parent.

It seems there is some kind of evolutionary parenting mechanism which kicks in which tries to get you to overlook all the crap you have to deal with when you have a kid - it's kind of analogous to how the body will produce endorphins to block pain after a severe accident.

Ha-ha! "Daddy, was I an accident?"

"No son, don't be silly. You were a severe accident!"

ArtSmart

thankfully evolutionary genetics takes care of the prob.

a set number procreate keeping the species going.

no need for 100% reproduction rates.

AND it kicks in in the teens, so lots of unexpected 'joy'.


if it were left to rational thought, the human species would be long extinct.

starbelgrade

Motorist wrote: »

I imagine it's $hit for around 8 years (especially the first 2 or 3 when they can't use a toilet). You have a few years of peace, then they turn into absolute teenage cnuts for around 6 years, then you're free of them albeit badly bruised, down around €250,000 and you're now old and grey. Life is great.

http://www.independent.ie/business/personal-finance/surviving-the-recession/raising-children-can-be-extremely-expensive-1634030.html

I wouldn't swap being a dad for all the money in the world.

NegativeCreep

keith16 wrote: »

Bigger fools if you ask me.

They are probably the same type of people who hate Monday's and count down the days to the weekend.

Living life in a soulless self-made rut.

Who doesn't hate Monday's? They're shit.
Not everyone is made to be a parent. I know for a fact that I would be crap at it. They annoy me. They ask too many questions, use up money, get into trouble which you are then blamed for, have terrible taste in music and watch those horrible nickelodeon shows all the time. No thanks.

marshbaboon

I'm never having kids. Mainly because I'm so irresponsible & clumsy that they'd die before they get to see their 2nd birthday.

ArtSmart

starbelgrade wrote: »

I wouldn't swap being a dad for all the money in the world.

ok, 10,000 billion. in ur pocket. tonight. u gonna say no?

Cee-Jay-Cee

I felt the same as you OP all through my 20's and into my early 30's. I now have a 2yr old and another child due any day now. I wouldn't swap them for the world, I would give up absolutely everything for them.

You may feel that way now and it probably means your just not ready to settle down and start a family just yet but more than likely that will change. I couldn't be bothered going out anymore, it's a pain in the hole apart from the obvious expense. Id rather have a few beers at home lying in comfort on the sofa watching tv.

Do you really want to be that sad 40 something still out every night at the weekend trying to pretend your 10yrs younger while all your friends are at home with their families?

ArtSmart

CJC999 wrote: »

I felt the same as you OP all through my 20's and into my early 30's. I now have a 2yr old and another child due any day now. I wouldn't swap them for the world, I would give up absolutely everything for them.

You may feel that way now and it probably means your just not ready to settle down and start a family just yet but more than likely that will change. I couldn't be bothered going out anymore, it's a pain in the hole apart from the obvious expense. Id rather have a few beers at home lying in comfort on the sofa watching tv.

Do you really want to be that sad 40 something still out every night at the weekend trying to pretend your 10yrs younger while all your friends are at home with their families?

Dude, you're harshing my buzz

shedweller

NegativeCreep wrote: »

watch those horrible nickelodeon shows all the time. No thanks.

Only if you provide it for them. It can be blocked you know. (of course you knew!)

ArtSmart

marshbaboon wrote: »

I'm never having kids. Mainly because I'm so irresponsible & clumsy that they'd die before they get to see their 2nd birthday.

well thankfully you have other options to relieve that urge....


that's right.


the GAA

starbelgrade

ArtSmart wrote: »

ok, 10,000 billion. in ur pocket. tonight. u gonna say no?

Not for all the money in the world.

keith16

NegativeCreep wrote: »

keith16 wrote: »

Bigger fools if you ask me.

They are probably the same type of people who hate Monday's and count down the days to the weekend.

Living life in a soulless self-made rut.

Who doesn't hate Monday's? They're shit.
Not everyone is made to be a parent. I know for a fact that I would be crap at it. They annoy me. They ask too many questions, use up money, get into trouble which you are then blamed for, have terrible taste in music and watch those horrible nickelodeon shows all the time. No thanks.

Sounds like that's other kids you are thinking about! Remember, kids are like farts, you can just about tolerate your own!

Cienciano

ArtSmart wrote: »

ok, 10,000 billion. in ur pocket. tonight. u gonna say no?

I would say no. Wouldn't even have to think about it tbh! It's not like a nice car that you put lots of work into, it's something that's just simply not for sale.