Are kids really worth all the hassle

ArtSmart

starbelgrade wrote: »

Not for all the money in the world.

Ok.

20,000 billion.

gara

It's all about priorities I guess -for some people the joy their children bring them far outweighs a Saturday night getting sloshed

BESman

strobe wrote: »

People having children they do not want or resent having is the cause of the majority of the human races problems imo.

This is the most accurate summary of everything that is wrong in the world. I think in the future, sterilisation for some may be a reality and it might not be such a bad thing.

Cienciano

ArtSmart wrote: »

Ok.

20,000 billion.

He'll accept and you'll hand it over in Zimbabwean dollars.

wonderfulname

furiousox wrote: »

It's only $hit for the first ten years, after that it gets easier.

Ha! Well you never met me as a teenager so...

What's with all the people thinking there's nothing more to life than either pubs or kids? That's far sadder than any 40 something year old on a night out pretending the ageing process doesn't happen.

ArtSmart

Cienciano wrote: »

I would say no. Wouldn't even have to think about it tbh! It's not like a nice car that you put lots of work into, it's something that's just simply not for sale.

nonsense. parents are selling their children for 10 dollars in some parts of the world.

ok, so you have a few bob etc.

but what if you were totally broke?


lol. i'm jus messin around.

keith16

gara wrote: »

It's all about priorities I guess -for some people the joy their children bring them far outweighs a Saturday night getting sloshed

Getting sloshed with the kids! Genius!

marshbaboon

ArtSmart wrote: »

well thankfully you have other options to relieve that urge....


that's right.


the GAA

If I had to choose between children and sport, I'd pick suicide.

ArtSmart

marshbaboon wrote: »

If I had to choose between children and sport, I'd pick suicide.

LOL!
I think i'm in love....

(em i'm male etc, so er, that's a joke. n stuff)

Witchie

Yes they are. My 2 sons are the people I enjoy spending time with most in the world. They are great company and fun to be around.

The first few years were tough but wonderful as you see all their little milestones and watch them grow.

The middle bit is where you get to have so much fun, building forts, climbing trees, playing football, going camping, taking them to concerts etc.

The teens can be difficult but thankfully so far my almost 18 yr old has not given me a minutes hassle, he has his leaving cert finished and is heading to uni in a few weeks. His life is now in his own hands and I am happy to say that he is a lovely young lad.

My younger is 14 (almost 15) and again has barely given me a moment of hassle. I know that may change but I also know he is worth whatever problems he will bring because he is lovely and he is my baby.

So yes, they are costly, they do leave you tired but there is nothing that compares to their presence in my life......and I have a full social life and a great boyfriend.

Brain Stroking

wonderfulname wrote: »

Ha! Well you never met me as a teenager so...

What's with all the people thinking there's nothing more to life than either pubs or kids? That's far sadder than any 40 something year old on a night out pretending the ageing process doesn't happen.

Nail on head. The going out every weekend routine is getting old but the having kids routine isnt appearing any more enticing as a result. What am i to do?? :eek:

Motorist

Having kids is such a beautiful, enlightening and transcending experience that takes you onto a higher plane of understanding humanity and the big question of why are we all here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nojWJ6-XmeQ

guitarzero

One of my biggest fears is to end up having kids through unprotected sex or a moment of stupidity (same thing).

I simply do not get why someone would want to commit most of their lives to other people like this. Just thinking about having kids gives me cold feet.

starbelgrade

guitarzero wrote: »

One of my biggest fears is to end up having kids through unprotected sex

It's pretty difficult to have them without having unprotected sex.

poppyvally

floggg wrote: »

!

So, are they really worth all the crap that goes with them?
?

YES! and more

Fr_Dougal

If you were a parent you'd understand.

ArtSmart

guitarzero wrote: »

One of my biggest fears is to end up having kids through unprotected sex or a moment of stupidity (same thing).

I simply do not get why someone would want to commit most of their lives to other people like this. Just thinking about having kids gives me cold feet.

as technology grows, so does life expectancy and therefore/ also contraception efficiency/ options.

still ,without sex n baby making i would not be writing this post, so...

ArtSmart

Motorist wrote: »

Having kids is such a beautiful, enlightening and transcending experience that takes you onto a higher plane of understanding humanity and the big question of why are we all here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nojWJ6-XmeQ

he he he

you're bold, you are

B.A._Baracus

Maturity and 'stage of live' are two things that really come into play here :P

A person at 22 can say "kids? i never want kids!" - come 29 they want kids tho.

Tonyandthewhale

guitarzero wrote: »

I simply do not get why someone would want to commit most of their lives to other people like this.

So who're you going to commit it to?

furiousox

Minimum requirements?

Endless love
Endless patience
Plus sacrificing being able to do what you want when you want for quite a few years.

Fr_Dougal

furiousox wrote: »

Minimum requirements?

Endless love
Endless patience
Plus sacrificing being able to do what you want when you want for quite a few years.

That's more ideal than minimum, there are plenty of parents that aren't fit to have a pet rock let alone a child.

marshbaboon

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

That's more ideal than minimum, there are plenty of parents that aren't fit to have a pet rock let alone a child.

You need a licence to have a dog, but you can fire out a litter of kids as big as you want.

There's something wrong with that.

ArtSmart

furiousox wrote: »

Minimum requirements?

Endless love
Endless patience
Plus sacrificing being able to do what you want when you want for quite a few years.

dude, we're talking about kids here, not drug use.

TeddyTedson

I wonder if being raised in a traditional family or opposed to other circumstances have any influence on this.

blatantrereg

Some time in their 30's, a lot of people start to slide slowly into despair if they dont have kids (or the prospect of having them). They can be loaded, like their jobs, do lots of fun stuff, but I still usually detect some undercurrent of despair in them.

On the other hand, people with kids often seem pretty strung out. Sometimes they seem trapped, even if they often seem happy to be trapped. I dont envy them either. Personally, I fear having kids, though I intend to have a couple.

Growing up sucks.

homeless student

Tonyandthewhale wrote: »

So who're you going to commit it to?

me, myself and I:) **** kids and staying with the same woman for that matter.

marshbaboon

homeless student wrote: »

me, myself and I:) **** kids and staying with the same woman for that matter.

That's the spirit!

Motorist

blatantrereg wrote: »

Some time in their 30's, a lot of people start to slide slowly into despair if they dont have kids (or the prospect of having them). They can be loaded, like their jobs, do lots of fun stuff, but I still usually detect some undercurrent of despair in them.

On the other hand, people with kids often seem pretty strung out. Sometimes they seem trapped, even if they often seem happy to be trapped. I dont envy them either. Personally, I fear having kids, though I intend to have a couple.

Growing up sucks.

I suppose the little runts are handy for driving you around when youre 80+

furiousox

ArtSmart wrote: »

dude, we're talking about kids here, not drug use.

I used to be into "hard drugs" at the weekends, now it's more "soft furnishings"

Witchie

Not necessarily. I have brought my boys up alone since they were 5 and 2 so even without the support of their dad it has been a pleasure.

Smidge

I'm not sure if the age of the parent is really relevant as there are two sides of every "club goldgrain";)

If you have your family young(ie 20's) you can miss out on certain things but on the flip side have the energy to raise them. Then you can enjoy your 40's!!

If you have your family later(ie late 30's) you have had your independence and "fun" for longer. It can be very difficult to give this up. Also, patience can be less but you have had your fun!!

kowloon

starbelgrade wrote: »

It's pretty difficult to have them without having unprotected sex.

Turkey baster. Not quite the same though.

JONJO THE MISER

To be honest i would not have the patience to have kids, i like my freedom too much also.

JONJO THE MISER

CJC999 wrote: »

Do you really want to be that 40 something still out every night at the weekend trying to pretend your 10yrs younger while all your friends are at home with their families?

Yes.

eth0

JONJO THE MISER wrote: »

To be honest i would not have the patience to have kids, i like my freedom too much also.

Im too much of a miser for kids.

say_who_now?

mishkalucy wrote: »

I'm not sure if the age of the parent is really relevant as there are two sides of every "club goldgrain"

If you have your family young(ie 20's) you can miss out on certain things but on the flip side have the energy to raise them. Then you can enjoy your 40's!!

If you have your family later(ie late 30's) you have had your independence and "fun" for longer. It can be very difficult to give this up. Also, patience can be less but you have had your fun!!

Haven't seen them around in years! God I'd love one now only I'd never be able to afford one with paying for what I affectionately call "the wallet squeezers"

Wompa1

homeless student wrote: »

better that than the guards knocking on your door on a saturday night with your kid looking guilty after doing something stupid.:p

If you didn't have kids what would you be doing?

I'm 27 and newly single. I'm living out foreign making crazy money doing contracting. I'm not sure what else there is to do for fulfillment.

I can't stand nightclubs anymore, don't go for one night stands and hardly ever drink and don't do drugs. Is there something as a guy with kids like you that you'd rather be doing? Or do you think it's a case you'd just like to go out and get laid again one last time and get it out of your system or what's the deal?

Wacker The Attacker

I'd rather have my grapes crushed in my senses than have chidren

homeless student

Wompa1 wrote: »

If you didn't have kids what would you be doing?

I'm 27 and newly single. I'm living out foreign making crazy money doing contracting. I'm not sure what else there is to do for fulfillment.

I can't stand nightclubs anymore, don't go for one night stands and hardly ever drink and don't do drugs. Is there something as a guy with kids like you that you'd rather be doing? Or do you think it's a case you'd just like to go out and get laid again one last time and get it out of your system or what's the deal?

what??are you sure that was fot me? I dont have kids and will never, thankfully:cool:

Wompa1

homeless student wrote: »

what??are you sure that was fot me? I dont have kids and will never, thankfully:cool:

ah ok. Thought you did since you said it's better than having your kid brought home by the Gardai.

I bet more than half of the people on this thread who say they won't have kids will end up having kids. I think I'd be happy to have kids when all of my friends and wife have died. But then I have nothing I'd want to spend money on anyway so maybe others get more kicks out of material possessions than I do.

homeless student

Wompa1 wrote: »

ah ok. Thought you did since you said it's better than having your kid brought home by the Gardai.

I bet more than half of the people on this thread who say they won't have kids will end up having kids. I think I'd be happy to have kids when all of my friends and wife have died. But then I have nothing I'd want to spend money on anyway so maybe others get more kicks out of material possessions than I do.

nope, i was just imagining a nightmare scenario like the one i mentioned.
ya I like material possessions:)

False Prophet

Are kids really worth all the hassle?
Yes
1) Think of all the silly/stupid posts/pictures you can spam of them in facebook:)
2) You have the power to force/mold a kid into whatever religion/sports team/failure/hangups that you have;)
3) You can do what im going to do and train them to become world class international superstars:D

blatantrereg

False Prophet wrote: »

Are kids really worth all the hassle?
Yes
1) Think of all the silly/stupid posts/pictures you can spam of them in facebook

You can get them to chase rodents and hide under cars and things. Then take photos and put captions like 'Meow meow meow meow' on them. Lolkids.

PizzamanIRL

All i see in the original post is 'money money money, blah blah blah, im afraid to spend money'

branbee

I had my daughter when I was 17- obviously she was a 'surprise'. Before I fell pregnant I knew I never wanted kids. Even now I would be happy to admit that if I hadn't had her I would not plan to have kids.
Having said that once they arrive they are not just 'kids', they are the little person you created and as they get older they get their own personalities that you love and they really arent just an endless list of inconveniences!
I completed an honours degree and started an internship in the same field since she was born. I have friends that I talk to regularly and I see them as often as I would if I didn't have a child. So I don't think having a child traps you or puts an end to your life as you know it unless you allow it to.

blatantrereg

branbee wrote: »

I had my daughter when I was 17- obviously she was a 'surprise'.

You must have been relieved to find out you hadnt just gotten very fat

summerskin

Lots of 16-25 year olds in this thread. 90% of them will have kids, 99% will settle down with someone, and none will remember the nonsense they are sprouting on here.

When I was 19 i had all the same views. I was never going to be settled down, I was going to travel the world and be a free sprit, never having kids.

20 years later and I'm in love with my wife and two children. Your life changes as you grow older and so do your priorities, it's folly to think otherwise.

floggg

say_who_now? wrote: »

And now just imagine if your parents had thought the same way you do before they had you- you wouldn't be here!

Isn't it better to ask these questions before I have a kid, thn having one and resenting it/being miserable.

To all the "sure what else would you be doing with your life/being on the pull/in a pub" comment leavers, that sort of response, is revealing, condescending and sad.

There are lots of couples who for whatever didn't or couldn't have kids. Their lives and relationships can be plenty fulfilling and they aren't prowling around Coppers drunk every weekend. If the assumption is that your life isn't complete without kids, then that's real sad because you mustn't be a fully rounded person if you need a child to give your life meaning. It's also a really bad reason to have a kid.

And to everybody who assumed childless at 40 meant single, it's revealing about the state of your own relationships if you couldn't see people wanting to be in a LTR without kids.

tbh

summerskin wrote: »

Lots of 16-25 year olds in this thread. 90% of them will have kids, 99% will settle down with someone, and none will remember the nonsense they are sprouting on here.

When I was 19 i had all the same views. I was never going to be settled down, I was going to travel the world and be a free sprit, never having kids.

20 years later and I'm in love with my wife and two children. Your life changes as you grow older and so do your priorities, it's folly to think otherwise.

exactly.

My son is 18 months old now, and not only is he the coolest little dude on the face of the planet (sorry, other parents) but he thinks the sun shines out of me as well. In my 20's and early 30s I've done the all-night drinking, the beach parties, the lost weekends, I've travelled all over the place and I've broken some hearts, and had my heart broken. Had an absolute ball.

Yes it can be tough when he's wide awake at 0630 on a Saturday morning, mad for craic, or he's grumpy and won't eat his dinner, and yes it's terrifying to think that he depends on me and my wife keeping our jobs and earning enough to give him everything he needs, but I can say with hand on heart that I've genuinely never been happier than when I've been curled up on a couch with my little pompom reading "That's not my tractor". Normally, when he's focused on something, a bomb could go off and he wouldn't flicker. But if I pretend to cry, he'll literally drop everything and run to me to give me a hug. You've no idea how that feels until you've experienced it yourself.

Edit to say: I know not everyone wants to be a parent, and I understand and respect that.