Believing What Your Mammy Told You...

leggo · 07-09-2012 3:00am #1

TLDR; What ****e do people believe, despite the lack of any evidence, because their parents told them it was true?

I often say that the most valuable lesson that I ever learned, from a young age, was that my parents could be wrong. In that it also allowed me the opportunity to question other things that friends, family and colleagues around me might take for granted. I've been an atheist since about 15, for example, despite being reared in about as Catholic a family as possible. You get the point...

But, while watching a Dara O'Briain stand-up show the other night, he made a good point about how, no matter how much evidence is out there saying that something is clearly a myth/fraud/con, people are still more likely to believe a story their Mammy told them about something that happened to a woman down the post office.

I suppose it's nice, in a way. It shows a certain bond and trust that people have with their parents. Unfortunately, that bond sometimes comes at the expense of them looking like a ****ing eejit in front of others at times.

It even became a running joke with a friend of mine a while back. No matter what you were debating, he would constantly use something his mam or dad once told him as if it was irrefutable evidence.

So what kind of myths do you hear people spouting, with complete disregard as to the facts and more regard of a story their parents told them years ago? And, for fun, what's the common, hearsay evidence behind it?

I'll start off with some examples:

Psychics
What They Say: "I know most of dem are con artists, but I'm telling ya, dis one is reeeeal! How else cud dey know that a person's name beginning with the letter J was my dead granny???"
What's actually true: If I was dead and speaking to a family member on the 'other side', I wouldn't waste their time by saying, "Hey there Mr Medium, I've got an important message for my living relatives and a limited amount of time before I've gotta do...dead person stuff. But first, they must pass this pop quiz, tell them my name begins with either a G or a J and I've a particular passion for something made of metal. Or steel maybe. No wait, it's plastic.

(Yeah, these people usual talk in textspeak)

Ghosts
What They Say: "Der was a noise in the house, the alarm didn't go off and der was nobody else home. What else could it have been?"
What's Actually True: You appear to have a rat infestation or something similar. But yeah, aside from the fact that it could've literally been anything in the ****ing world, you naturally assume that it HAS to be something that hasn't even been proven to exist. Never speak to me again.

Mortgages
What They Say: "Rent, dead money, yada yada."
What's Actually True: I've stopped listening. Like I did when you went on an anti-Fianna Fail rant, literally seconds earlier.

Bob Dylan is a great singer.
What They Say: "He issssss! I always listen to a bit of Bob before bed.

" (they may actually say the words "smiley face" at the end of the sentence here)
What's Actually True: Many find him to be a great lyricist and a visionary, myself included. But have you ever heard him sing or do you just know his name because you looked at your Dad's CD collection one time? No, no wait, you just said your favourite song of his was 'Jammin'. Yep. You're talking about Bob Marley.

AlmightyCushion · 07-09-2012 3:09am

My momma said that alligators are so angry because they got all them teeth but no toothbrush.

brummytom · 07-09-2012 3:10am

Your mommy might be wrong, but mine never is. She told me so.

Mickey H · 07-09-2012 3:11am

Mammies talk sh1te on occasion. True story.

event · 07-09-2012 3:25am

If the wind changes, your face will stay like that..

Mickey H · 07-09-2012 3:28am

event wrote: »

If the wind changes, your face will stay like that..

That was a good one. Tried to prove it loads of times. Failed miserably every time.

gobnaitolunacy · 07-09-2012 3:32am

'Mummy dog/cat ate all her puppies/kittens'
In reality, they got a trip to the river in a bag...and mummy dog/cat got a kick up the hole for being a supposed cannibal.

Swallowing chewing gum....sticks in your guts.

Where To · 07-09-2012 4:06am

My mummy told me I was handsome.

And that I'd meet and marry a nice girl when I grow up.

Thinking of changing my name to Peter Fcuking Pan at this stage.

mikemac1 · 07-09-2012 6:50am

My old dog had gone away to live on a farm

We already lived on a farm

ronan45 · 07-09-2012 6:56am

If i told a lie or broke something my mammy would make me stick out my tongue

" AHHHH its black you lied, You lied didnt you your tongues black!"

:rolleyes:

Hasmunch · 07-09-2012 7:07am

I never did go blind..... despite what i was repeatedly told

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 07-09-2012 8:14am

"Momma always said life is like a box of chocolates - you never know what you're gonna get."

Bollox - they have that little menu card on the back of the lid that tells you exactly what you're going to get. In pictures.

faceman · 07-09-2012 8:28am

event wrote: »

If the wind changes, your face will stay like that..

This one is true. Kind off. It relates to Bell's Palsy and potential causes due to Cold weather on the aul facial nerves.

Although studies have shown weather has a potential impact studies to date have not had enough case studies to ultimately confirm this is the case

lil'bug · 07-09-2012 8:50am

if you write on your hands you will get cancer!
also I was found under a rhubarb patch apparently

hairyprincess · 07-09-2012 8:54am

My mammy told me there would be days like this.

Oh no, hang on, that was Vans mammy. My bad

LordSutch · 07-09-2012 8:55am

My Mammy Mummy never did like Al Jolson

hoodwinked · 07-09-2012 8:56am

when i asked how she found me out when i did things i wasn't meant to.

"the walls have eyes and ears"

No we just had annoying nosey neighbours who couldn't keep their mouths shut! :mad: