Child walking home for school alone...

mozattack

Friend of a friend and all that....

Parents split up years. Parent 1 has full time job while parent 2 is unemployed. The child has just turned 8 and parent 1 has just found out that he is being left walk home alone from school.

School to home is around half a mile and would take around ten minutes but it is a busy area of town.

School is very responsible but in my opinion he shouldn't be allowed do this.

Parent 2 phone Parent 1 over this, there was a row but the giist of it was that the child wants to walk home alone and parent 2 was then told to "f**K off".

Parent 1 has the child 3-4 nights a week, brings him to sports, activities etc but the one thing that is hard for him to do is to collect him from school.

Not sure what parent 1 can do here. Any ideas?

edellc

See if any of the neighbours have kids the same age/class as this kid going to this school and if so ask them to collect child and walk/drive him home also, maybe give a few quid a week for doing this to make sure its done.

Even if its not a neighbour see if one of the kids friends mothers could collect him and drop him home

On a side issue, if the kid is walking home and no parent can collect the child then does that mean that an 8yr old child is walking home to an empty house and if so that is a bigger issue, and if the child isnt walking home to an empty house then why can whoever it is that is in the house get off their arse and walk the 10mins to the school and get the child, after all could they live with the guilt if anything did happen to the child

mozattack

"On a side issue, if the kid is walking home and no parent can collect the child then does that mean that an 8yr old child is walking home to an empty house and if so that is a bigger issue, and if the child isnt walking home to an empty house then why can whoever it is that is in the house get off their arse and walk the 10mins to the school and get the child, after all could they live with the guilt if anything did happen to the child"

Thanks for the reply.

That is the thing, there is no empty house, he will go back to his grandparents house usually who are very good to him, safe for this walking home from school issue. The mother is too lazy (a drunk if I am being honest) so it all comes down to the grandparents or the father. Mother is making it easy for them by throwing this line that the child wants to walk home while the father completely disagrees with this.

I agree on every point you make and I think if there is 0.0001% chance of something happening to the child, well that is too much of a chance.

The mother is a waste of space but at the end of the day the father cant mind the child while he works full-time so it is a difficult one.

Can the father ring social services or anything?

KKkitty

This is unacceptable imo. All it takes is a split second and this boy could be snatched. I would never allow my son to walk home from school on his own. You need to get tough with your friend. Tell her what's what. If she doesn't change then ring social services.

Sleepy

KKKitty, mozattack's friend has very little power as the non-custodial parent here, especially as a father in Irish courts (unless he can prove the mother is an alcoholic and apply for full custody and even then he'd be doing well to win).

Am I the only one who thinks this is a bit of a case of being over-protective here? I certainly walked to and from school with my schoolfriends when I was 6 or 7 and would see plenty of kids around that age doing it in our little fella's school. That said, the school is in a quiet enough suburb

mitosis

We walked to and from school when we were 7-8. In Inchicore.

In the OP's case, could the grandparent walk to meet the child? It's only half a mile, so a very short distance.

I think it's over-protective, but I understand. There is always a risk, but life's like that. There will always be a risk.

eviltwin

mitosis wrote: »

We walked to and from school when we were 7-8. In Inchicore.

In the OP's case, could the grandparent walk to meet the child? It's only half a mile, so a very short distance.

I think it's over-protective, but I understand. There is always a risk, but life's like that. There will always be a risk.

Same here and my daughter walked home from school at that age, about a 15 min walk. She wasn't unusual either.

At what age do people think its acceptable for children to walk home alone?

mozattack

Hi guys...

I dont know if it is a case of being overprotective or not.

The child says his friends does it but who cares really? Maybe next year but at 8 I think he is way too young. I don't know.

edellc

I lived a far distance from my school and we had to get a bus, I was not allowed to travel to or from school until I as in secondary, however I did meet my mam over in the shopping centre and walked over there with my older sister and cousin when I was in 4th class, so around 10yrs old.

I understand peoples reaction about it being over protective, however this is a different day and age and whereas I would be worried about someone snatching a child to a degree, my biggest concern would be crossing roads, as I have seen plenty of motorist run red lights and dont get me started on cyclists. I would feel a bit more comfortable if it was as group of kids walking home together but on their own is a big no in my mind especially at 7.

OP if the father of this child is concerned then he needs to apply for joint custody and once he has this then he can bring up the issue regarding walking home from school.

I think saying the mother is an alcoholic is a bit much unless you can prove it and if this is the case, there is no way I would leave my child in the care of an alcoholic ever, and I would fight tooth and nail to get the child away from the situation. since the child is 7, how long has the mother allegedly been an alcoholic? and if its been any length of time then the father is also at fault for not going for custody sooner. you can not go running the mother down and make out the sun shines out of his backside when what is he doing to change the situation other than bitching and running his mouth off with accusations about the mother

mozattack

edellc wrote: »

I lived a far distance from my school and we had to get a bus, I was not allowed to travel to or from school until I as in secondary, however I did meet my mam over in the shopping centre and walked over there with my older sister and cousin when I was in 4th class, so around 10yrs old.

I understand peoples reaction about it being over protective, however this is a different day and age and whereas I would be worried about someone snatching a child to a degree, my biggest concern would be crossing roads, as I have seen plenty of motorist run red lights and dont get me started on cyclists. I would feel a bit more comfortable if it was as group of kids walking home together but on their own is a big no in my mind especially at 7.

OP if the father of this child is concerned then he needs to apply for joint custody and once he has this then he can bring up the issue regarding walking home from school.

I think saying the mother is an alcoholic is a bit much unless you can prove it and if this is the case, there is no way I would leave my child in the care of an alcoholic ever, and I would fight tooth and nail to get the child away from the situation. since the child is 7, how long has the mother allegedly been an alcoholic? and if its been any length of time then the father is also at fault for not going for custody sooner. you can not go running the mother down and make out the sun shines out of his backside when what is he doing to change the situation other than bitching and running his mouth off with accusations about the mother

All fair points but just to respond:

1. Very difficult to prove someone is an alcoholic.. extremely difficult. No matter what the evidence says (liver failure, erratic behaviour), there is no proof. Also Social Services do nothing to intervene here unless they believe the child is in harm. In respect to the child, he spends 50% (and more) time with the father and the rest of the time is spent with his mother and her parents... he has guardianship and a court order to see him

2. Custody is very difficult here, the child has a half brother with the mother and in general he is looked after well. Success chances are very low.

3. Even if custody was granted it doesn't help the father with collections from school... he is in work etc etc

HeyThereDeliah

I would not let any child in primary school walk home alone. Parents or an adult should be there waiting for them unless they are getting a school bus.
I'm surprised the school allows this to happen.
The father can ring social services but there is little they can do tbh. He could speak to the grandparents and see if they would pick him up.

I know the father is working and cannot pick him up but still it's his responsibility as well and he is allowing it to continue.