Finding friends in Kilkenny - impossible?

fifilasparkle

Dear All,

I hope you are all fabulous on this sunny Saturday! I am wondering if anyone might be able to help me... I moved to Kilkenny back in June for my job and I am finding it difficult to find friends in the city.

I am a very social person who has lived abroad and in other places in Ireland and have always had a good circle of friends, so Kilkenny is slowly killing me! :S It seems that everyone is either married with kids in Kilkenny (everyone at work), or very young and there seems to be nothing in the middle...

I am 26, a girl and I love going out, watching rugby, going to the cinema, going to gigs, and a million other things, but I do not really want to sit in a pub alone and hope that I can find a friend and there does not seem to be too many other options... so if anyone knows of a gathering/meetup event that might result in friendship, I would be super grateful!

I tend to go back to Dublin at weekends, so ideally I am looking for a mid week meetup...

I have read other threads in this forum about how difficult it is to find friends in Kilkenny, so maybe I am not the only person in this position and we could organise a drink some evening in a pub and see how many turn up?

Happy Saturday anyway!

Fi

Dozen Wicked Words

Most people do their socialising at the weekend, even in Kilkenny, around the time you are back in Dublin. Not making light of your struggle but just pointing out a minor flaw in your search for friends. Also, one more mini criticism, why does being married with kids rule them out of your search, I think married people remain the same species as unmarried people.

1984baby

http://www.meetup.com/The-Kilkenny-Social-Club/

fifilasparkle

Hi Dooferoaks,

Well I stayed in Kilkenny at weekends for over a month, but as I knew no-one it was depressing... but of course if I had friends a weekend in Kilkenny is a more likely possibility! The married with kids referring to people in work was that none of them seem to socialise due to issues with babysitter availability. I am sure there are couples with kids who do socialise, but in my experience they tend to not to be looking to make new friends outside of their current circles - maybe I am totally wrong and they would love to make new friends, but my experience to date (outside of Kilkenny) would suggest that they are less likely to be interested....

Thanks for the reply though! Have a nice weekend!

Dozen Wicked Words

fifilasparkle wrote: »

Hi Dooferoaks,

Well I stayed in Kilkenny at weekends for over a month, but as I knew no-one it was depressing... but of course if I had friends a weekend in Kilkenny is a more likely possibility! The married with kids referring to people in work was that none of them seem to socialise due to issues with babysitter availability. I am sure there are couples with kids who do socialise, but in my experience they tend to not to be looking to make new friends outside of their current circles - maybe I am totally wrong and they would love to make new friends, but my experience to date (outside of Kilkenny) would suggest that they are less likely to be interested....

Thanks for the reply though! Have a nice weekend!

Didn't want to have too much of a downer on your post, sorry if it came across that way. I moved to Kilkenny 9 years ago, most people I have met have been open and friendly enough and willing to chat, but that's probably not the same as having actual friends. It was different for me though being married and also having no interest in making friends (too lazy).

There is a couple of old threads on here that do have a few suggestions, signing up for courses etc. but I reckon you will have no trouble eventually. Shame your workplace is seemingly such a dud for likely people, anyway, genuinely wish you good luck!

Arawn

What kind of gigs?? What other million things?? Would help fot suggestions??

twinkletoes

join a sports club midweek?...ie.running, indoor football?..check out the classes on in the watershed?..join a language, crafts, other class??..dance classes? musical society?..should be great places/oportunities to meet people?

Tracyon2004

fifilasparkle wrote: »

Dear All,

I hope you are all fabulous on this sunny Saturday! I am wondering if anyone might be able to help me... I moved to Kilkenny back in June for my job and I am finding it difficult to find friends in the city.

I am a very social person who has lived abroad and in other places in Ireland and have always had a good circle of friends, so Kilkenny is slowly killing me! :S It seems that everyone is either married with kids in Kilkenny (everyone at work), or very young and there seems to be nothing in the middle...

I am 26, a girl and I love going out, watching rugby, going to the cinema, going to gigs, and a million other things, but I do not really want to sit in a pub alone and hope that I can find a friend and there does not seem to be too many other options... so if anyone knows of a gathering/meetup event that might result in friendship, I would be super grateful!

I tend to go back to Dublin at weekends, so ideally I am looking for a mid week meetup...

I have read other threads in this forum about how difficult it is to find friends in Kilkenny, so maybe I am not the only person in this position and we could organise a drink some evening in a pub and see how many turn up?

Happy Saturday anyway!

Fi

Hi Fi,
I would love to meet up sometime. I live in Kilkenny city but have found recently I have lost most of my friends to Australia. I love cinema,gigs also (not so much rugby) I'm 26 and female.
Anyway if you fancy meeting up for a pint or tea etc just pm me or whatever happens in here (I'm new :-))

Tracy.

fifilasparkle

@1984baby - thanks I came across them before and had joined so will see how that goes! Thanks!

@Arawn, I love indie/folk/alternative music but anything really once not classical. heavy metal or super poppy! I am fairly easy going really - if it has potential to be fun I am always interested!

@twinkletoes - not so much into playing sports and nor can I sing; but I looked into the classes angle and realised you cannot learn French in Kilkenny; nor can you do advanced cake decorating or cooking courses so I gave up! But thanks for suggestion!

@Tracy - sent you a message!

Happy Monday everyone!

Arawn

fifilasparkle wrote: »

@1984baby - thanks I came across them before and had joined so will see how that goes! Thanks!

@Arawn, I love indie/folk/alternative music but anything really once not classical. heavy metal or super poppy! I am fairly easy going really - if it has potential to be fun I am always interested!

@twinkletoes - not so much into playing sports and nor can I sing; but I looked into the classes angle and realised you cannot learn French in Kilkenny; nor can you do advanced cake decorating or cooking courses so I gave up! But thanks for suggestion!

@Tracy - sent you a message!

Happy Monday everyone!

billy byrnes and cleeres pubs might be worth a look so??

For outside things you could try get out and try rock climbing in ballykeef or theres a kayak club in kk

Captain Havoc

fifilasparkle wrote: »

I looked into the classes angle and realised you cannot learn French in Kilkenny; nor can you do advanced cake decorating or cooking courses so I gave up! But thanks for suggestion!

That's not true, l'Alliance Francaise de Kilkenny give courses in French.

up for anything

fifilasparkle wrote: »

I looked into the classes angle and realised you cannot learn French in Kilkenny; nor can you do advanced cake decorating or cooking courses so I gave up! But thanks for suggestion!

Ryeland House Cookeryl for the cake decorating classes.

dathi

you could try salsa dancing on a tuesday 8pm in pegasus night club at the back of kilford . most people have no partners and come for a laugh.

fifilasparkle

thanks - I had not found those two course - I looked at the VEC offering! Thanks guys will check it out!

@Daithi - thanks for idea - but with two left feet I probably should save you all the pain! Have fun though!

Dr.Sanchez

I'm from Kilkenny but moved to London recently and having the exact same problem. I know what its like and its not a very nice feeling...

Goat the dote

I'm from kk and in kk and I've no friends!! The only problem is I'm with a family I'm gone past the pub stage

bluestar2010

i know the feeling. it seems the older one gets the harder it is to make new friends.

hi5

If your walking down a street in Kilkenny and you meet a stranger, the first thing they do is pull out their mobile phone and pretend they are receiving or sending a text, they do this so they dont have to make eye contact or say hello, the lack of confidence is almost unbelievable.
While your not going to make friends with everyone you meet on the street a little less hostility can go a long way in the long run.

Green Brigade

Its probably just you they're trying to ignore by the sounds of it.

hi5

Green Brigade wrote: »

Its probably just you they're trying to ignore by the sounds of it.

Well I must admit things have sort of improved since I stopped wearing the long mac , Do you think the OP might have an image problem....hmm?

banjodave

Hey, Finding friends in Kilkenny - impossible?

Fair play for posting that message, I'm not the only one, yay! From Cork, moved back to Kilkenny from Canada and finding it difficult to find people to hang out with. I've volunteered at some festivals and play indoor footy. I'm 30, and just not ready to stay in watching 'nation-wide' every evening. Let us know if you organise any pub night etc, or want any help doing so. Just have to be pro-active about this stuff eh?!

JohnMc1

My old Driving Instructor put it best when she said the Irish were very Clique-ish. She said once they get into their little groups that's it. You have know chance of getting in with them.

Threadhead

Irish people are very clique-ish but the way to remedy this is to make your own clique!

No harm in organising some sort of meet up. At the very least you all have some common ground.

Captain Havoc

JohnMc1 wrote: »

My old Driving Instructor put it best when she said the Irish were very Clique-ish. She said once they get into their little groups that's it. You have know chance of getting in with them.

Every nationality is cliquish. Out-of-towners generally tend to hang around with out-of-towners. If you do get into an established clique, it'll probably be through work, hobby or flatmates.

bluestar2010

i would recommend kilkenny social club on meetup.com. they always welcome new members.

JohnMc1

Captain Havoc wrote: »

Every nationality is cliquish. Out-of-towners generally tend to hang around with out-of-towners. If you do get into an established clique, it'll probably be through work, hobby or flatmates.

I realize that. I wasn't trying to bash the Irish by any means.

J DEERE

Join the local Kilkenny City Macra. Great organisation. Regardless of what most people think, its not for farmers. I'd say 90% of the people in the Kilkenny City club aren't from a farming background at all just people like yourself who have moved to the county, are interested in meeting new people and having a social outlet which doesn't always involve drinking. They play indoor soccer weekly, go bowling, organise trips away, nights out, table quizzes, fundraisers etc. If you want more info, I'll PM you the contact details of the people over it

angelfalling

You should come join the Waterford Viqueens roller derby team We have a couple girls who come down from Kilkenny so you could organize some carpooling. The Irish are cliquish, and no not every nationality is this way-- it isn't an unusual thing to hear that people from elsewhere have found it difficult to make friends (I did!). If you think you'd be into it, http://www.facebook.com/waterfordcityviqueens

Gypsy Roman

I have just moved down from Dublin and I have to agree with ya very hard to make mates. I have tons back in the big smoke but I left Dublin cause I want to try something new and if I go back to Dublin every weekend to see old mates and stuff ill just want to move back cause I do love Dublin have to say but want to experience life in a far off distant tropical land...............like Killkenny. Everyone is very friendly down here and very welcoming but as I literally know no body down here I have not had a chance to really enjoy the Killkenny nightlife and all the rest this brilliant city has to offer as I am not willing to be the lad that heads out on his own. If one of them nights mentioned above is organised for other so called "Blow Ins" let me know cause sounds like there are plenty of us in the same boat.

blobbyblob

Gypsy Roman wrote: »

I have just moved down from Dublin and I have to agree with ya very hard to make mates. I have tons back in the big smoke but I left Dublin cause I want to try something new and if I go back to Dublin every weekend to see old mates and stuff ill just want to move back cause I do love Dublin have to say but want to experience life in a far off distant tropical land...............like Killkenny. Everyone is very friendly down here and very welcoming but as I literally know no body down here I have not had a chance to really enjoy the Killkenny nightlife and all the rest this brilliant city has to offer as I am not willing to be the lad that heads out on his own. If one of them nights mentioned above is organised for other so called "Blow Ins" let me know cause sounds like there are plenty of us in the same boat.

The travel agent sold ya a pup there horse...far from tropical at the moment.

Join a club and do a bit of volunteering. Theres very few clubs that would refuse you. You'll have plenty of mates in no time.

Kilkennys no different to anywhere. Just find a bit of commonality/shared interest and off you go.

Captain Havoc

Gypsy Roman wrote: »

If one of them nights mentioned above is organised for other so called "Blow Ins" let me know cause sounds like there are plenty of us in the same boat.

Why don't you organise one yourself? Very easy, just tell people where and when and hopefully some will show up.