Too many new projects : how to say no

bubule

Like my job alot, like the people i work with, been there for 4 years ,problem is the team has gotten smaller and the workload has been shared out within the remaining team and there are 3 or 4 new very time consuming projects on the table and I am involved in all of them, I am notorious for never saying no ( friends family will all agree with this) as I'm afraid of conflict. finally last Friday after working 16 hours per day mon-thur I cracked I had a massive panic attack, ended up at the doctors, I'm off today on sick leave but have to go back in tomorrow, confront my boss and make sure he does listen to me this time when I say I need help. I'm scared witless that he will run a guilt trip on me, argue with me, or worse of all ignore the whole thing and I'm still stuck with 4 jobs instead of 1. I have asked for help in the past 4 months since it got really bad, and was fobbed off by him telling me he was talking to someone with a view to joining the team, was also told by him I am bored of my old job (true but it's still a 40 hour week job and no one else is being brought in to do it) I would love to take some time off but think that would make me dread going back even more, plus I don't get paid for sick leave.
Anyone have any advice for me on how to be strong during confrontation?
Any idea what my rights are legally when stress and anxiety are making me sick?
Know anywhere I can go for CBT to help me learn to say no?
Sorry for long post, Bubule

Procrastastudy

I love conflict people who love conflict are worse than dealing with it than people who hate it. Just take on board any points made by you manager but make it clear the hours are making you ill. I wouldn't go quoting law as that almost universally backfires. That said the Organisation of Working Time Act is worth a read if you need to assert your legal rights. I stress this should be a last resort.

Most good managers will reailse they've reached breaking point with an asset and the meeting will go okay. Unfortunately the majority or managers are idiots. Just be very reasonable, agree a lot but pick your one point and stick to it.

Option 2 is go out sick and give Mr/Mrs. Manager a few days of heart attacks and hope that gives them pause for thought. Social Welfare payments are available if there is no company sick pay.

Good luck OP - just stick to your guns re hours.

bubule

Procrastastudy wrote: »

I love conflict people who love conflict are worse than dealing with it than people who hate it. Just take on board any points made by you manager but make it clear the hours are making you ill. I wouldn't go quoting law as that almost universally backfires. That said the Organisation of Working Time Act is worth a read if you need to assert your legal rights. I stress this should be a last resort.

Most good managers will reailse they've reached breaking point with an asset and the meeting will go okay. Unfortunately the majority or managers are idiots. Just be very reasonable, agree a lot but pick your one point and stick to it.

Option 2 is go out sick and give Mr/Mrs. Manager a few days of heart attacks and hope that gives them pause for thought. Social Welfare payments are available if there is no company sick pay.

Good luck OP - just stick to your guns re hours.

Thanks Procrastastudy will let you know how it goes

Wanderer2010

Tell your boss you need a few minutes chat with him when you go back and tell him straight out that you are struggling with the workload and you flat out cant work 16hrs a day, thats inhumane and also will make you tired and lose concentration etc so you are no good to anyone. There is no excuse for that many hours and it sounds like the manager is using you to be honest. This will just continue if you let it. So tell him you dont mind doing extra hours now and then but as of now, you need help with dividing out the 4 projects.

dixiefly

I would advise you to use this as an opportunity to modify the way you work in this company. Your colleagues will probably be aware that this panic attack came from the overwork.

You should start back as you mean to continue and set a particular set of working hours that you feel you can live with and use the hours after that to get some physical exercise etc in.

I think you should work no more than 9/9.5 hours on average and no more than 12 hours on any day. If the work cant be done in that time then it's your boss' problm. I have worked a few jobs where more and more was piled on when I let it happen but I managed to shift monkeys and delegate after a while.

Politely but firmly inform your boss that you have to reduce your hours due to the medical issues but thatb you will continue to give 100% when working and that a fresher you should be better for the company.

bubule

Thanks dixiefly have put together some notes and have completed a timetable of my work

bubule

Thanks a million Wanderer2010 will post an update tomorrow

Mrs OBumble

bubule wrote: »

Know anywhere I can go for CBT to help me learn to say no?
Sorry for long post, Bubule

Your GP should have some suggestions, or be able to get you some. If they can't/won't, then you need to get a new GP.

And absolutely no probs re the long post, your story is exactly what this forum is here for.

Good luck.

finisklin

bubule wrote: »

Thanks a million Wanderer2010 will post an update tomorrow

How did it go?