Repetition

Princessa

Hi Parents,
I have a little girl who will be 3 in a month. Shes the best little woman and she is a little chatterbox around people she knows.

I was wondering if any of ye have any experience with the little problem we are having. She is constantly i mean constantly repeating herself when she talks.

For example we were waiting to be served at the cash register and she turns to me and says.... "Mom everybody has to wait their turn."
To which i reply "Yes thats very good we are all waiting for the girl to serve us"....
"Everybody has to wait their turn Mom"... "Yeah"
"Everybody has to wait their turn Mom" .... "Hmmm hmmm"
"Everybody has to wait their turn Mom"
"Mom everybody has to wait their turn."
Then she will change the tone how she prounounces words in the sentence..
"Everybody has to wait their turn."
"Mom everybody has to wait their turn."
Etc etc etc.....

Its constant throughout the day. When i am brushing my teeth she can literally tell me 50 times that i am brushing my teeth. Even when i nod to acknowledge that i have heard her.

If she is in her car seat she will say random things over and over again. Her nanny took her to Kilkenny and for the entire 45mins car journey home she just repeated. "Rain rain go away, come again another day"

We have tried everything. We always acknowledge the statement the first time she says it. We have tried ignoring her when she keeps repeating herself after we have acknowledged the first statement. We have tried saying yes, yes to the repetitive statements so she knows we are listening to her. We have tried explaining to her what repeating herself is and that she only has to say it once. Nothing works.

Im pregnant on number 2 and i am suffering with terrible SPD so i am on crutches. Im a bit slow getting around the place even the house and im finding it very tough with her. Her repetition is even worse when she wants something. I was making supper in the kitchen and she wanted me to change the cartoons on the sky box for her.
"I need you to change Mickey Mouse now please"......

"Mammy is just putting your dinner on your plate so we can watch a cartoon together after dinner"

"I need you to change Mickey Mouse now please"......
"I need you to change Mickey Mouse now please"......
"I need you to change Mickey Mouse now please"...... On and on and on.

Anybody have any experience with this, and it is going on so long that it is def not a phase that she is growing out of. It sounds silly but its unbelievably frustrating when she literally wont stop repeating herself.

She is due to start playschool in Jan and im really worried that she will be constantly repeating herself in there. Or when the baby comes and if im breastfeeding or changing a dirty nappy and cant get something right away for her she will just go on and on and on.

Just dont know what to try anymore as she is getting worse with the repetition not better so id love to know if anybody else had a problem like this and what they tried etc.

Thanks.

Hannibal Smith

Gah! Yes! It is very annoying! Even when you acknowledge what they say they still keep going. I'm so glad to see ours isn't the only one. I take it as a phase he'll grow out of when he masters the art of conversation.

I tell him to tell me something only once...and sometimes he stops himself. It can be very distracting when driving though!

January

Yes, it's quite normal for them to repeat at that age. My nearly four year old still does it sometimes. It can be quite annoying though

Princessa

Thanks very much for the replies. Its nice to know that its quite normal. My sister mentioned it to me the other day that she repeats herself alot and that my niece wasnt like that at all. Sure all kiddies are different so hopefully its just a long phase we are going through... until it returns in the teenage years with. I need money, i need money, i need money!!!

Mr.Wemmick

Yes, my wee girl did it too.. but has mostly grown out of it. But just wait till the questions hit you, never ending why, why and more whys.. and often repeat questions. Sometimes she accepts the answers and starts a conversation about what ever topic it is, but other times she will not stop asking the same question over and over until she gets the answer she wants.. and when I am busy, or distracted, I have to stop for a minute, think about it, then give her the answer I think she wants to hear. I'm knackered :P

This is what i got this morning after she drew a picture of two tents:

Her: Why is one tent pink and the other tent cool?
Me: Er.. erm.. ah.. because..one tent belongs to a boy and the other one belongs to a girl..
Her: No!
Me: I don't know, love..
Her: (in an annoyed voice) You do know, tell me.. why is one tent pink and the other cool?
Me: (desperately trying to remember her description of the picture she had drawn earlier of two tents) er.. because you and Sam are going camping on your holiday
Her: Yes!.. followed by her chatting away about this pretend holiday she is going to have.
Me: Phew!

Now that she is getting older, she's 4.. she is beginning to accept some don't knows from us, but not all.. she also drives her older sibling nuts, who has told her she is only allowed to ask 3 questions a day

Princessa

Ha ha ha that made me smile thats the older sibling has given her a question quota.

Thank god its not just me that finds its annoying so. Not all the time now - most of the time i can brush it off but it can get very frustrating at times.

I guess that some kids are just more repetitive than others...

Thanks for that Mr. Wemmick i didnt even think of the questions stage :eek:

SusieBlue

My niece does this! Also, if she's telling a story, and she stutters over a word or forgets something she has to start the entire story over again. Pretty sure its normal for their age

chicamom

What a Chatter box!! I can just picture your face at the check-out! (But I feel it's a good thing, you'd be more worried if her speech was delayed afterall!) Some kids are exceptionally verbal and your daughter sounds like she is in the higher percentiles there! I thinks it's interesting that she plays with the stress on various words in the repeated sentences...it's as if she is exploring the grammar and subtle differences in meaning (I think (not 100%), this is known as the syntax of the sentence). She's sort of working it out for herself ...but (unfortunately, for you) out loud! Sounds like she's a natural linguist and you could encourage her by making it into a game you all play (this might help her siblings with language skills too). Just all start repeating sentences, taking turns to move the stress around. Play it at dinner time, you never know she might get bored of it after a while once she's worked out a few hundred permutations of "OK I get it now....OK, Iget it!...OK, I GETit now! Good luck.

Princessa

Thanks very much for your comment Chicamom. You def shed a new light on the situation for me. Your completely correct, i would be more worried if she was challenged with her speech.

Oh when we repeat ourselves to show her what repeating yourself means, she gets extremely frustrated. She will say "Dad/Mom stop it please its not nice to repeat yourself" That doesnt work when we say it to her though .

Roselm

Hey OP,
Can I ask, how is her conversation outside of the repetition. Can she take turns normally and have a little "conversation" with you/comment on things/tell you about Dora on the TV etc.
If this is just at certain times that she repeats herself then maybe she just likes the sound of her own voice/playing with the words!?
If she only ever talks like this then it could be something to keep an eye on.
Hope that came across ok/I haven't overstepped the mark...

chicamom

Hi OP, sorry I got a bit mixed up reading the thread...(when I referred to her siblings!) You mentioned in fact that you are still expecting No.2. It occurs me that this could well be significant and may be the reason for this "phase" becoming a little prolonged (although she is only 3, so it's not really that unusual). She has a lot going on in her life (as do you yourself!) and this may be a slight regression. Many younger kids go through this during their mum's pregnancies and it is perfectly normal and totally understandable from the child's point of view. It's definitely an attempt to get your attention..she no doubt notices you are preoccupied and something is "going on" with you but maybe doesn't really understand "what". How could she , she's only a tot herself! So she uses her "Super-verbal" powers to keep your attention fixed on her. The repetitions are like little darts that keep her linked to you, like a comfort-seeking behaviour. (Some kids are very tactile and become super-clingy). The "chanting" in the car to Kilkenny may be a way of self-sootheing, after all she was probably strapped in to a car seat in the back all alone staring at the back of her Nanny's head, and possibly felt a little lonely. I wonder if this is just her way of trying to keep you focused on her as she's feeling a little insecure. I still think she'll be a brilliant linguist tho' or even an actress or performer of some sort! The Kilkenny trip reminded me of a journey I made when my oldest boys were little and we had "The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round" from start to finish over and over( with actions!) from West of Ireland to London! I was ready to throw myself under the wheels of the first bus that came along, by the time we got there!

Princessa

Hi roselm, yeah she will have little conversations with me. If she is at her nannys or my sisters she will tell me if they have given her a sneaky biscuit or if they played a certain game etc.

Thats a good point chicamom but im only 28 weeks and i think shes only realised the last few weeks that theres a baby in my belly even though we tried to explain it to her as best we could. It may be prolonging the phase a bit though as she has been doing it for quite some time.

Ha ha ha oh dear, i would def be fit to throw myself under the bus.

Thanks for all the replies, they have been very interesting to read.

pickarooney

My daughter used to repeat herself over and over as well but eventually grew out of it. If you pretend to be really enthusiastic about what she's saying she'll take it as encouragement to keep asking and if you ignore or grunt in response she'll take umbrage and repeat it louder. I think it's really just her getting used to the sound of her own voice.

I find the only way to stop this 'why' cycle is to throw the questions back at her. Every time she asks something, ask her for her opinion or what she'd do in that situation. It radically slows down the torrent of whys without completely stopping them.