My Roommate

DaveNoCheese

So my roommate comes out with some of the most random stupid stuff ever...

Got home from work today and the first thing she asked me was --


Her: If I was in a rocket in space and it blew up but I managed to get out in time and I had my spacesuit on, would I travel through space until I reached 90 years of age.

Me: Ehh no, you'd run out of oxygen after a few hours.

Her: Oh ok... dya think there are aliens out there?

Me: I dunno, maybe, why?

Her: I was just thinking about another planet out there with humans on it... dya think they have celebrities?

Me: I really don't know....

Her: Y'know, like Kim Kardashian?

Me: Yes, they have celebrities just like Kim, her name is Kim Marsdashian :rolleyes:



And that's just the half of it, anyone else have roommates/friends who aren't fully there half the time?

juan.kerr

DaveNoCheese wrote: »

her name is Kim Marsdashian :rolleyes:

You could have done a better job with this OP, Mardashian sounds much better for starters.

4zn76tysfajdxp

DaveNoCheese wrote: »

Me: Yes, they have celebrities just like Kim, her name is Kim Marsdashian :rolleyes:

Talk about a killer one-liner. You must've been delighted with that one.

admiralofthefleet

do a poo on her chest when she is asleep

blame it aliens

????

profit

Youssef Chippo

juan.kerr wrote: »

You could have done a better job with this OP, Mardashian sounds much better for starters.

No it doesn't

juan.kerr

I often wonder if the OP of threads like this swap around the participants. I know I sometimes do when I tell stories to prevent me looking like a complete idiot.

Youssef Chippo

Ask her does she want to taste Dave's cheese

juan.kerr

Youssef Chippo wrote: »

No it doesn't

Of course it does. rolls off the tongue compared to Marsdashian and gets the same point across.

Where To

How do you and she manage to talk in colours OP?

9959

Does your room mate mysteriously change in appearance every six months or so?
Can you detect constant muzak at a very low volume?
Does someone with a pompous air visit you daily and ask you in a non-judgemental tone:"How does that make you feel"?

When you look out your quadruple-glazed windows, CAN YOU SEE SOME VERY,VERY HIGH WALLS?

Chucken

Where To wrote: »

How do you and she manage to talk in colours OP?

..the drugs

Shryke

Room mate or house mate because your username is Dave. You're not going to be sharing a twin with a girl. Do you call your partner your room mate?
Anyway it sounds like they were winding you up with idle chat. You must be easily wound up.

HeyThereDeliah

What is a roommate?

Celly Smunt

Somebody has a crush.OOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooo

DaveNoCheese

Where To wrote: »

How do you and she manage to talk in colours OP?

Chucken wrote: »

..the drugs

Pretty much somes it up...

saiint

DaveNoCheese wrote: »

So my roommate comes out with some of the most random stupid stuff ever...

Got home from work today and the first thing she asked me was --


Her: If I was in a rocket in space and it blew up but I managed to get out in time and I had my spacesuit on, would I travel through space until I reached 90 years of age.

Me: Ehh no, you'd run out of oxygen after a few hours.

Her: Oh ok... dya think there are aliens out there?

Me: I dunno, maybe, why?

Her: I was just thinking about another planet out there with humans on it... dya think they have celebrities?

Me: I really don't know....

Her: Y'know, like Kim Kardashian?

Me: Yes, they have celebrities just like Kim, her name is Kim Marsdashian :rolleyes:



And that's just the half of it, anyone else have roommates/friends who aren't fully there half the time?

if shes fit
blonde
your in their

DaveNoCheese

Jamie Lemon Belt wrote: »

Talk about a killer one-liner. You must've been delighted with that one.

I don't want to blow my own trumpet... Mainly 'cause I can't but yes, yes I was quite proud :cool:

Merkin

I've lived with some absolute corkers. Came home one evening to find the girl I was sharing with sitting in the living room eating her own toenails

DaveNoCheese

Merkin wrote: »

I've lived with some absolute corkers. Came home one evening to find the girl I was sharing with sitting in the living room eating her own toenails

Why? Just why?!

TPD

Merkin wrote: »

I've lived with some absolute corkers. Came home one evening to find the girl I was sharing with sitting in the living room eating her own toenails

That sentence had so much potential until the word 'toenails'.

Merkin

DaveNoCheese wrote: »

Why? Just why?!

I could actually write a book about her, she was bat-**** crazy.