At what age is living with your parents a bit weird?

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lisa_celtic wrote: »

Moved out at 18 - Moved Home at 20 - collage
Moved Out at 21 - Moved home at 22 - collage
Moved out at 22 - Moved home at 23 – row with house mates
Moved out at 24 and I’m gone for good this time all settled with my own place,, dog and job no going back

Never say never. You might decide to go to college some day

OneArt

Festy wrote: »

I highly doubt a part time job would be enough for rent,bills,food,clothes and a few brews down the local.:rolleyes:

Depends on your lifestyle. I always did things on the cheap, but when I was in college in Ireland living away was the best thing I did. Also, my parents live in a village. Living in Dublin meant I was pretty much close to everything so I didn't have to spend much.

petersburg2002

I left at 22. I have three older siblings in their mid 30s to early 40s and all working. They all still live with my mother and father. I think she just pampered them for too long. She still cleans their rooms and cooks their meals. In tired of telling her to kick them out.

Pilotdude5

And another point. 30 years ago my parents finished their leaving cert at 17. Straight after they both went for interviews for Nursing and got in. They were on a salary straight away (no 4 years of college, rent, minimum wage jobs etc to deal with) By the time they were 24 in 1988 they could afford to buy their own big house for £30000. They still had to get a £5000 mortage as they had (according to themselves) Been going out 6 nights a week for 6 years as if was cheap to do so back then.

I don't expect to own my own house until I'm in my 40's (and even then the bank will own it:()

Shred

lisa_celtic wrote: »

Moved out at 18 - Moved Home at 20 - collage
Moved Out at 21 - Moved home at 22 - collage

Twice there and you still can't spell College? I'd demand my money back if I were you.

Jokes aside, I think people should be moved out no later than 25 if their circumstances allow it. This is simply for their personal development if nothing else, to teach them to stand on their own two feet and experience the empowerment of independence. I was nice and cosy at home up to 27 when I moved out; I pretty soon regretted not doing it years earlier.

wilkie2006

lisa_celtic wrote: »

Moved out at 18 and I’m gone for good no going back - Moved Home at 20 - collage
Moved Out at 21 and I’m gone for good no going back - Moved home at 22 - collage
Moved out at 22 and I’m gone for good no going back - Moved home at 23 – row with house mates

FYP.

lisa_celtic wrote: »

Moved out at 24 and I’m gone for good this time all settled with my own place,, dog and job no going back

Fingers crossed anyway, right?

JamieKCCO

Jamez735 wrote: »

You went to college and you still can't spell college?

"The future of Ireland, right here"

He actually just made some really nice collages

The One Who Knocks

JamieKCCO wrote: »

He actually just made some really nice collages

She, actually, but funny all the same

Wolf Club

I think it depends on the situation really. A lad I work with still lives with his parents, even though he's got a good job, has to pay rent to his parents, and has a fairly hefty commute to make every day. He's in his early 20s, but I'd find this a bit more strange than someone 10 years older living with their parents if they were unemployed/studying.

longhalloween

I'd say it's weird to be in your early 20's and have NEVER lived outside the house. I'm 24, living at home, but I've lived in a few different places and countries before now.

optimistic_

It really depends on circumstances. I think mid thirties gets a bit weird. But there are so many variables.
I wanted out at 18, couldn't afford it for a good while after and I think finally got out properly at 25/26 (two failed attempts, one at 20 and another for 6 months at 22)

I'm only replyign to this cos i'm stuck in work running reports

kilograms

I honestly think its a thing of the past that you must move out. Back in the 60s and 70s how many people under 23 were married. It was like you must have kids, get married and start your own family but these days its more about setting your own goals in life and doing what you feel you should do rather than what other people think you should.

Shryke

optimistic_ wrote: »

It really depends on circumstances. I think mid thirties gets a bit weird. But there are so many variables.
I wanted out at 18, couldn't afford it for a good while after and I think finally got out properly at 25/26 (two failed attempts, one at 20 and another for 6 months at 22)

I'm only replyign to this cos i'm stuck in work running reports

Slumming it on the internet, are you?

optimistic_

Shryke wrote: »

Slumming it on the internet, are you?

Haha something like that!
Thought I'd see how the other half live!!

Ah no, I come here often.

clappyhappy

I know 4 brothers aged between 18 and 33 and they all live with their parents at home. 18 yr old I can understand, but the other 3????? 25,28 and 33 all in full time employment, 2 teachers and one a consultant. NONE of them pay any rent, buy food pay towards bills etc. Their mum washes and irons all their clothes, cooks breakfast, dinner makes their lunches etc. I think its crazy.
They are all sound out, good decent lads but god help the future wives.

FaganJr

18 - 21 is optimum, any older and your straying into weirdsville.
I left at 18 and never looked back. No issues at home, folks great. Class house etc. Just needed my own space.
Even weekends at parents is a chore.

kilograms

clappyhappy wrote: »

I know 4 brothers aged between 18 and 33 and they all live with their parents at home. 18 yr old I can understand, but the other 3????? 25,28 and 33 all in full time employment, 2 teachers and one a consultant. NONE of them pay any rent, buy food pay towards bills etc. Their mum washes and irons all their clothes, cooks breakfast, dinner makes their lunches etc. I think its crazy.
They are all sound out, good decent lads but god help the future wives.

I doubt that very much!

optimistic_

clappyhappy wrote: »

I know 4 brothers aged between 18 and 33 and they all live with their parents at home. 18 yr old I can understand, but the other 3????? 25,28 and 33 all in full time employment, 2 teachers and one a consultant. NONE of them pay any rent, buy food pay towards bills etc. Their mum washes and irons all their clothes, cooks breakfast, dinner makes their lunches etc. I think its crazy.
They are all sound out, good decent lads but god help the future wives.

That bugs me. I live alone so do literally everything from cleanig and ironing to cooking, shopping, having people over (incl family) - Really gets my goat when I go home and people aren't picking up after themselves, or cooking for themselves.

Butterface

I moved out at 18 for college and lived in a different part of the country for 7 years. Now I'm in my mid-twenties, back in college in the UK and have to spend the holidays back home in my parent's house. Circumstance dictates..

Moving back in with your parents after so many years is tough. They immediately reverted to treating me like a teenager, and I've already made plans for next summer so I don't have to repeat that living situation again. I do love my parents, and I'm lucky that they allowed me to stay with them, but it feels embarrassing at my age tbh.

I have a cousin who is nearing her mid-forties still living at home, still bickering over domestic issues with her parents. It would drive me up the wall!

cruiser178

Personally i think 20 and its time to go, time for the kids to fly the nest and stand on their own 2 feet and make a life for themselves, time for the parents to start taking it easy in the latter stages of their lives. I not a believer in the "im only living with the folks because of the recession" bs. Obviously you would do anything for your kids but i would strongly discourage them living at home after their 20's.

Columbia

It depends on a lot of factors, not least the individuals involved, personal circumstances, whatever.

I moved out at 18, 24 now, but I'm not settled down anywhere (not even 1 particular country). I could certainly see a situation where I end up back home for 6 months for whatever reason. My parents still keep my bedroom the way I left it and I know there will always be a bed there for me when I need it.

KERSPLAT!

Moved out at 24 but back home now at 26, it's shît but being unemployed made it very difficult. Back in college now and hoping to find some part time work that suits so I can move back out. It's grand at home but I really need my own space

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater

MaxSteele wrote: »

Mammy and Daddy pay for that nice flat in Dublin so you could get away from the backward parochial town and go to college ?

A bit OT, but why does everything outside Dublin have to be backward and parochial?

Climb down out of your arse.

bluecode

It all depends as others have pointed out. I lived with my parents on and off at different times. As did most of my family, coming back from abroad or family crises or some other reason. At one stage I was living at home in my thirties along with my married sister with her two kids and one other sister.

Saving for a deposit for a house is common.

I had a funny one. I aged 45 went back to live with my Mother after my honeymoon and stayed with her while my wife lived in our house alone. Although I did visit her! :eek:

Of course there was a good reason. My house was on the other side of the country and I hadn't got a job near there yet. Then redundancies came up but I had to stay months to make sure I got a very nice pay off.

It was a bid mad though. Moving back in with your Mother coming back off your honeymoon!

KERSPLAT!

IPAM wrote: »

Moved out at 24 but back home now at 26, it's shît but being unemployed made it very difficult. Back in college now and hoping to find some part time work that suits so I can move back out. It's grand at home but I really need my own space

Just to add I don't live at home for free, €45 a week to my mother along with chores and odd jobs around the house

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater

Madam_X wrote: »

deccurley: I think Max was taking the piss out of that mindset. Oh yeh going away to college and the folks paying lots of the costs... doesn't count as moving out in the sense of becoming independent.

Depends where you grow up too. If you're from a rural area you often have no choice but to move away - doesn't mean you wouldnt stay at home though if you were born in Dublin.

If he was, he made a bad job of it tbf.

endacl

seamus wrote: »

25.

If you haven't at least made a cursory attempt to move out by the time you're 25, then there's something wrong with you.

The only exceptions to this rule are still being in college (doing a PhD) or being unable to work.

What if you're repeating your repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the repeat of the Leaving Cert because you're just a couple of points short of the perfect course?

FloatingVoter

I could move out but I've stopped being a child and become a carer. With no brother and sisters your parent (singular) can get old and ill seemingly overnight.
Life is complicated that way. 37 atm.

magma69

A thread for people to gloat about moving out on their own when they were nine, getting by in college eating 2 slices of bread a day living in a hut made out of milk carton coupons.

SunnyDub1

cruiser178 wrote: »

Personally i think 20 and its time to go, time for the kids to fly the nest and stand on their own 2 feet and make a life for themselves, time for the parents to start taking it easy in the latter stages of their lives. I not a believer in the "im only living with the folks because of the recession" bs. Obviously you would do anything for your kids but i would strongly discourage them living at home after their 20's.

"Not a believer in all this bs recession" cause clearly it hasn't effected you in anyway.

How do you expect a 20 year old to move out and afford rent, bills etc if they have no job?

Serious question!

Lot of people out there unemployed and majority of people aged 20 are in college.

JuliusCaesar

I think this thread has answered itself:

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JuliusCaesar

.

cruiser178

SunnyDub1 wrote: »

"Not a believer in all this bs recession" cause clearly it hasn't effected you in anyway.

How do you expect a 20 year old to move out and afford rent, bills etc if they have no job?

Serious question!

Lot of people out there unemployed and majority of people aged 20 are in college.

I moved out at 16 but i moved to another country with £400 in my pocket, i wanted to work and i found work (this was also in a recession, 80's) when my kids grow up i expect them to do exactly that, grow up. As i said, obviously you would help your kids out but strongly discourage them from living at home after their 20's. Are you still living at home and over the age of 20? Oh and i can assure you, this recession has hit me very hard but you never lie down, you do what you have to do to survive.

kowloon

Don't you get reduced dole when you're under a certain age (21?). I'd say that kills off any notion of someone getting out of home without a job.

Agricola

Not really interested in what society classes as odd or weird. A few years back society said you were odd if you didnt see the sense in forking out quarter of a million for a bungalow in Cavan....... that worked out well.

The more pertinent point here is, is it better as a parent to be fully supportive of your kids, bow to their every wish and if they show no signs of wanting to move out, just accepting that as the way it is because you luurve them. OR - Start to niggle them from the age of 18, keep increasing the pressure on them til they're 22, and progress to full scale rowing until they leave after that.

Originally I would have said Id go with the former option. I despise people who pop out kids because its the done thing, and then count the minutes til they are adults so they can turf them out on their ear and get back to their own care free lifestyle. People with that attitude don't deserve children. But I do see alot of sense in the latter approach.

A friend of mine had a huge aversion to working when he got to 16/17, and also had a love of the handy life his mammy afforded him at home. I think if it wasnt for his mother he would be on the dole at home now still at 33/34! She basically gave him categoric orders to get summer work, she set up jobs for him when he didnt, and once he got his degree, he got 6 months to set himself up or he was told he had to go as there was no excuse for being there with a good qualification. He got such an arse kicking that he completely changed after that. Hes now in England running a software dev company and earning megabucks. He still thanks her to this day.

So yeah there is a lot to be said for the the tough love approach with some people.

daz801

I'd say within a year after finishing college. By then you should have found a job and be able to afford your own place. If you haven't found one by then I say it's about time you upped sticks and looked abroad.

Hippies!

srumball wrote: »

If brought up correctly/motivated correctly there is no excuse for people to be living at home passed 22 (finish college get job/skilled in career path if not in college) should be educated enough/skilled enough to attain a full time job at least part time and afford their own place.

21 actually, no excuse for someone to be still in school passed 18, now that's weird.

dj jarvis

89 - now that would be weird

DEFTLEFTHAND

Somebody mentioned earlier in the thread that Italians live with their parents for ages, I found the same is true of many young Spanish people. I noticed that many don't set up on their own until they get married, the parents still treat their twenty/thirty something year old children like babies.

LuckyLloyd

In this thread people think everyone else should take the path they chose in life.

BOHtox

lisa_celtic wrote: »

Moved out at 18 - Moved Home at 20 - collage
Moved Out at 21 - Moved home at 22 - collage
Moved out at 22 - Moved home at 23 – row with house mates
Moved out at 24 and I’m gone for good this time all settled with my own place,, dog and job no going back

You're not fooling anyone!

TheUsual

magma69 wrote: »

A thread for people to gloat about moving out on their own when they were nine, getting by in college eating 2 slices of bread a day living in a hut made out of milk carton coupons.

It's "collage".
Get with the program, loike. :rolleyes:

cuana

I will never ever forget after a night of fun with some fella who failed to mention he lived at home with his mother, father and two other sisters! nothing more humiliating forcing polite conversation with his mother over tea and toast in the morning he was 36!

Saying that it really does depend on everyone personal circumstances

TheUsual

cuana wrote: »

I will never ever forget after a night of fun with some fella who failed to mention he lived at home with his mother, father and two other sisters! nothing more humiliating forcing polite conversation with his mother over tea and toast in the morning

It's better than that movie Trainspotting, when Renton wakes up with the girl's 'flatmates' who turn out to be her parents when she arrives down in her school uniform.
Doh !

Jumblon

What if you've got no arms and no legs? Wouldn't it be alright to live at home all your life?

dark crystal

I would definitely wonder why any grown adult wouldn't want to live independently of their parents. It's what adults are supposed to do!

I also think parents who don't want this for their children have their own issues. Part of being a responsible parent is to prepare your children for independent living once they've flown the nest. Infantilising them and treating them like adolescents really isn't doing them any favours in the long run.

Before anyone jumps down my throat, I'm not having a go at anyone living with their parents out of sheer necessity, more so the ones who have no desire to move out at all, despite having the means to do so. Sorry, but that is weird.

Madam_X

cruiser178 wrote: »

I moved out at 16 but i moved to another country with £400 in my pocket, i wanted to work and i found work (this was also in a recession, 80's) when my kids grow up i expect them to do exactly that, grow up. As i said, obviously you would help your kids out but strongly discourage them from living at home after their 20's. Are you still living at home and over the age of 20? Oh and i can assure you, this recession has hit me very hard but you never lie down, you do what you have to do to survive.

Different times the 80s. What if you had a child who was in college until 22/23 doing a degree in, say, electrical engineering? Should they move out at 20 if the college is near their folks' place and go to you for loans?

These arbitrary cut-off points are utter bollocks.

As long as a person is paying their own way and helps out around the house and has their own transport and gets out a good bit to socialise etc, why give a sh1t?

HalloweenJack

Depends on their reasoning for it. There are plenty of valid and invalid ones.

If they can't afford it or have no job, which would be a lot more common these days than previously, I don't think it matters.

If they're just too lazy or too comfy, then it's weird. Shows a lot of negative characteristics in that person, like lack of ambition and unwillingness/inability to grow up, etc.

cuana

TheUsual wrote: »

It's better than that movie Trainspotting, when Renton wakes up with the girl's 'flatmates' who turn out to be her parents when she arrives down in her school uniform.
Doh !

ha!! Too funny ohhhhh god thinking about it now makes me cringe!!

Eve_Dublin

You should move out when you can afford to pay your rent.