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Friday Funnies

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  • 30-11-2012 12:17pm
    #1
    MonkieSocks
    Registered Users Posts: 8,310 ✭✭✭


    Whenever I'm feeling down I cheer myself up by going to the nearest playground and watch the kids run around, screaming and shouting.



    They don't know I'm using blanks.

    __________________________

    I'm a psychologist, and the other day I couldn't help wondering,

    Suicide Bombers, what makes them tick?

    __________________________


    I feel the Wife and I share the same sense of humour,

    We have to she hasn't fooking got one.

    __________________________

    Batman came up to me and he hit me over the head with a vase and he went, "T'PAU!"

    I said, "don't you mean KAPOW??"

    He said, "no, I've got China in my hand."

    __________________________

    A piece of gold walks into a bar.

    The Barman says "Au, get out of here"

    __________________________

    It said on the news today that Barack Obama is enjoying a "honeymoon period" with the American people.

    Enjoying?

    My new wife had one of them, and it ruined the whole trip.

    __________________________

    My wife came home from work crying yesterday and asked me to console her.

    So I hit her over the head with my Xbox.

    =(:-) Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude (-:)=



Comments

  • Options
    #2
    Hilly Bill
    Registered Users Posts: 6,039 ✭✭✭Hilly Bill


    The BBC have cancelled Bob The Builder, apparently they don't trust anyone who can fix it now...!!!


  • Options
    #3
    tossy
    Registered Users Posts: 9,590 ✭✭✭tossy


    MonkieSocks wrote: »
    Whenever I'm feeling down I cheer myself up by going to the nearest playground and watch the kids run around, screaming and shouting.



    They don't know I'm using blanks.

    __________________________

    A piece of gold walks into a bar.

    The Barman says "Au, get out of here"

    __________________________

    My wife came home from work crying yesterday and asked me to console her.

    So I hit her over the head with my Xbox.

    3 gems! Well done


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