Do people have more fun quoting Father Ted than actually watching it?

Valentina

We have to lose that sax solo

statto25

Instead of a mouth its got four arses

Valentina

statto25 wrote: »

Instead of a mouth its got four arses

And it's got a retractable leg so it can leap up at you better!

13spanner

Valentina wrote: »

And it's got a retractable leg so it can leap up at you better!

it's as big as four cats...

Valentina

13spanner wrote: »

it's as big as four cats...

And for some reason it has a tremendous fear of stamps...

statto25

Valentina wrote: »

And for some reason it has a tremendous fear of stamps...

And when it yawns it sounds like Liam Neeson chasing a load of hens around inside a barrel

Valentina

statto25 wrote: »

And when it yawns it sounds like Liam Neeson chasing a load of hens around inside a barrel

It has magnets on it's tail so if you're made out of metal it can attach itself to you

statto25

Valentina wrote: »

It has magnets on it's tail so if you're made out of metal it can attach itself to you

It doesnt have any eyebrows....except on saturdays

omahaid

Ha, what a fail for the OP. This is like the Dental Plan thread.

Drink! Feck! Arse! Girls!

Valentina

statto25 wrote: »

It doesnt have any eyebrows....except on saturdays

It has four ears - two for listening and two are sort of back up ears.

Super-Rush

Dark Artist wrote: »

I'm another person guilty of dropping a good Father Ted quote when the opportunity arises, but I dare say that in my own experience, the quoter's delivery of the line may be better than the original delivery in the actual show. When I watch Father Ted now it's not quite as funny as I remember it, but that may be because it's been out for centuries?

Shut the feck up.

srm23

Dark Artist wrote: »

When I watch Father Ted now it's not quite as funny as I remember it, but that may be because it's been out for centuries?

:eek: I don't belieeeeeeeeve it!

Stained Class

Haven't read thru all this, but I consider Fr Ted a 'Beatle' program.

You never tire of listening to the Beatles, right? Most people dont anyway. You always keep coming back to them.

Fr Ted is my televisual equevilant. I'd watch episodes of it all day long & still find something new in it funny.

In my book, that makes it a great programme. If you disagree with me, remember.

I can have you killed.

maddragon

Jacobs Creek Chardonnay 1991.

srm23

Ted: What was it Jack used to say about the needy? He had a term for them.
Dougal: A shower of bastards.

maddragon

Stained Class wrote: »

Haven't read thru all this, but I consider Fr Ted a 'Beatle' program.

You never tire of listening to the Beatles, right? Most people dont anyway. You always keep coming back to them.

Fr Ted is my televisual equevilant. I'd watch episodes of it all day long & still find something new in it funny.

In my book, that makes it a great programme. If you disagree with me, remember.

I can have you killed.

Put down the whistle

ProudDUB

Careful now !

Down with this sort of thing !

Was at a family Xmas party last night. Am proud to say that both those lines were used at various stages of the nights proceedings multiple times, when one of the oul wans present trotted out one of her tedious old wives tales YET AGAIN. :mad:

The Fr Ted inspired witty riposte never gets old. I'll be a very happy camper if the same lines are still being used when we are all old and grey 50 years from now.

Valentina

Polly Clarke: My husband. Now there was a man who really was afraid of Virginia Woolf.
Ted: Why? Was she... following him or something?

srm23

Ted: I think it might work, Dougal. I know it'll work. It will work.
Dougal: It won't work, will it Ted?
Ted: ...It won't, no.

Valentina

Ted: I know for a fact St. Tibulus wore more clothes then that. He was from Norway or somewhere, he'd have frozen to death.
Dougal: And do you remember that bit when St. Tibulus tried to take that banana off the other lad.
Ted: That wasn't a banana Dougal.

Stained Class

maddragon wrote: »

Put down the whistle

Feck off.:pac:

irishfeen

Dougal: Didn't you tell me once that Father Jack had a trial for Liverpool?
Ted: No... no, he was on trial, in Liverpool.

Mr Cumulonimbus

Mrs Doyles finest rant:

Mrs Doyle: I never thought we'd have anyone like her staying here.
Father Ted: Hm? Oh, Miss Clarke, yes, it's very exciting isn't it? Famous novelist, here.
Mrs Doyle: You've never read any of her books, have you, father?
Father Ted: Actually, I'm a bit of a fan. That's where I was the other day - at her book signing.
Mrs Doyle: Well, I'm very surprised to hear that, father. I didn't think you'd like that sort of thing. I read a bit of one of them once. God, I couldn't finish it. The language, unbelievable!
Father Ted: It's a bit gritty, but that's the modern world, Mrs. Doyle.
Mrs Doyle: Ah, it's a bit much for me, father. "Feck" this and "feck" that.
Father Ted: Yes, Mrs. Doyle.
Mrs Doyle: "You big bastard". Oh, dreadful language! "You big hairy arse", "You big fecker". Fierce stuff! And of course, the f-word, father, the bad f-word, worse than "feck" - you know the one I mean.
Father Ted: Yes, I do, Mrs. Doyle.
Mrs Doyle: "Eff you". "Eff your 'effin' wife". Oh, I don't know why they have to use language like that. "I'll stick this 'effin' pitchfork up your hole", oh, that was another one, oh, yes!
Father Ted: I see what you mean, Mrs. Doyle.
Mrs Doyle: "Bastard" this and "bastard" that, you can't move for the bastards in her novels! It's wall-to-wall bastards!
Father Ted: Is it, Mrs. Doyle?
Father Ted: Anyway...
Mrs Doyle: "You bastard!" You fecker!" "You bollocks!" "Get your bollocks out of my face!" It was terrible.
Father Ted:Yes, you go and prepare for the nuns.
Mrs Doyle: "Ride me sideways" was another one!

phasers

"You've a face like a pair of tits!"

"At least that's one pair between us!"

icjzfmq7ewon1t

phasers wrote: »

"You've a face like a pair of tits!"

"At least that's one pair between us!"

Those women were in the nip

Father Damo

Did ya tell him Im havin dinner here?......well tell him ta feck off!


Oasis or Blur?

Stained Class

Father Damo wrote: »

Did ya tell him Im havin dinner here?......well tell him ta feck off!


Oasis or Blur?

Imagine you saying a Mass, hearing Confession or doing a funeral.:pac:

What would you say or do to lend an air of dignity to the proceedings?

icjzfmq7ewon1t

Pat was just wondering could he put his massive tool in my box

Max Power

"get the feckin' crunchies out of the car!"

Senna

Please stand for your national anthem.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpYyqaSYLyw

13spanner

The speech Dougal gave when they thought Jack was dead.

''So anyway you're up there with the Lord, Stalin and Bob Marley...''

antodeco

You have used 2 inches of sticky tape

Wait a minute, those are fake hands!

You'll address me by my proper title ya little bollocks

cherryghost

And now on BBC1, Jurassic Park: The Director's Cut. With extra dinosaurs.

im invisible

I brought the normal scrabble and the travel scrabble, Ted. The travel scrabble for when we were travelling, and the normal scrabble for when we arrived!

Ah, no, now that i think of it, i didnt bring either...

im invisible

Bishops love sci-fi

gammygils

Ah Come On now. Enough! There's no need at all for this nonsense.
I'm telling you you're impressing no one with that type of thing

He's puncturing the tyres Ted!

JustAddWater

Will it still be a class 2 relic when they remove it?

dgt

Sorry Ted, I was holding the ticket upside down

Soby

No Dougal , its not morning

marcsignal

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcPDHkX1qWA

TAlderson

I'm not sure about the quoting Father Ted business, but is there anything to be said for saying another Mass?

gammygils

July 19th Haaah! Why does that strike me as important?

July 19th? I wouldn't know Ted ya big bollox!

darragh16

Nah, that was Fr Burke. Father Daly was the man with the lump in the side of his head in the shape of Connaught

darced

This post has been deleted.

FudderMucker

Dark Artist wrote: »

When I watch Father Ted now it's not quite as funny as I remember it, but that may be because it's been out for centuries?

I'm the same. Doesn't have the same effect unfortunately.

Brian2208

Dougal: God, I can't wait to see what's under tomorrow's window. I bet it's a donkey or something.

Father Ted': Really? So, you've changed from your initial prediction of... what was it again? "Ruud Gullit sitting on a shed"?

bradlente

tallaghtmick wrote: »

I love my brick!

Ahh feck it!Fed up with breeeeek!

corktina

"put your purse away Mrs Doyle" (A line stolen from my wife...)

doledude86

How much did you pay for that door Ted?

I don't know Liam it came with the house...

wp_rathead

"Sun's out, and I'm in an opticians.. Doesn't get any better than this"- Dougal

Prob my fav line ever