Trivial things that annoy you

Tzardine

People who say " Im just touching base with you "

Czarcasm

Strituck wrote: »

People who say " Im just touching base with you "

Now let's just park that there and move on...

Disco Stuart

Disco Stuart wrote: »

YES!
And they usually bend them out of shape with their fat heads, then go "Oh my god, you're so blind".

"OH MY GOD, how can you see through those??"

With my eyes, generally.

eisenberg1

Thoie wrote: »

Dear man in gym. You've been sitting on your arse blocking that machine for 20 minutes talking to your friend. You're not talking about the machine. Go and snuggle up with him in the changing room or something, just let me use the blasted thing and get out of here.

Was it a vending machine and you were just trying to get chocolate or crisps?:D

OldNotWIse

Strituck wrote: »

People who say " Im just touching base with you "

"I'm just checking in with you"

salacious crumb

"Key stakeholders"

I actually sniggered the first time I heard someone pull this one out at a meeting. Christ on a bike.

OldNotWIse

salacious crumb wrote: »

"Key stakeholders"

I actually sniggered the first time I heard someone pull this one out at a meeting. Christ on a bike.

They're always the ones who hit the ground running...

salacious crumb

OldNotWIse wrote: »

They're always the ones who hit the ground running...

...going forward :pac:

RedFormanFITA

Just to be sure we're on the same page.

Can you leave that with me, and I'll get back to you.

Can I take your name and number and I'll get (insert name here) to call you back when he/she returns from lunch/comes out the meeting/returns from holidays/returns from sick leave/is finished with the client.

All of the above trivial things annoy me.

osarusan

window of opportunity.......

RedFormanFITA

Here's an idea I want to run by you.

Aglomerado

osarusan wrote: »

window of opportunity.......

Which the person who said it should jump out of, especially if it is several floors above ground, while touching base with themselves. Bástards.

Gokei

A lad I worked with used to dare me to slip daft stuff into meetings,
Started out blandly enough, "lets put this idea up the flagpole and see which way it flies.."

Ended up having to stop at, "the retardation of the market is causing inward blotation(?) of the stock, which unchecked, will inturn cause the methanisation of our core base".

Everyone pretended they knew what we were on about at the meetings.

jimgoose

We'll all need to have skin in the game here. I'll revert to you and we can flagpole when I have a better helicopter view. Also, I have to get these eels out of my hovercraft.

Tzardine

RedFormanFITA wrote: »

Here's an idea I want to run by you.

Keep jogging MF should be the correct response.

eisenberg1

I was at a meeting a few years back, and one of the senior "hot shots" said Well , we can put that on the back boiler", I nearly pissed myself

homemadecider

Feckin trying to spell the word 'unnecessarily'. Takes me ages.

Tzardine

Off topic for the thread , but on the subject of business speak. Many moons ago I worked for a UK based company. Myself and the rest of the Irish management team were going over to England for the yearly conference of nonsense.

One of the women decided on a game where we would all be assigned a word and we had to get it into a conversation while addressing the whole conference.

Some of the words given were portaloo , condom , maix pad etc. I ended up with hammer head shark.

Everybody managed to get their word out which was hilarious but I had no idea how I could slip in Hammer Head Shark into conversation.

So one of the directors asked me a direct question about something important like budgets (cant remember exactly what) . I stood up, shouted Hammer Head Shark at him and sat back down.

The Irish crowd burst into tears and the rest of the company thought I had an intellectual disability. Explained it to the director at drinks that night and he though it was gas.

All this nonsense business speak really winds me up.

yeppydeppy

People who say "Just a quick one there for you...." before asking a complex question.

Prettyblack

Strituck wrote: »

Hammer Head Shark

You could've said "We're gonna bust through our numbers like a hammer head shark!"

Tzardine

Prettyblack wrote: »

You could've said "We're gonna bust through our numbers like a hammer head shark!"

You sir are everything I hate about business :P

eisenberg1

Just caught the news on RTE radio, and the readers used the word(s) Brishish/British and Tyne/Town

jimgoose

eisenberg1 wrote: »

Just caught the news on RTE radio, and the readers used the word(s) Brishish/British and Tyne/Town

Boot, mile, etc. :mad:

Prettyblack

"Bitterly cold" annoys me, not the phrase itself, but the way it is used in weather forecasts.

Is "bitterly" a scientific level of temperature? Is it a valid way of saying how cold it will be? What is "bitterly" anyway? One man's bitter could be another man's fresh.

OldNotWIse

Who'd have guessed when you google "annoying weather forecast phrases" when you get to "annoying weather forecast p"...the dropdown suggests "annoying weather forecast phillipines"

OldNotWIse

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2507633/Get-grip-pull-voted-annoying-phrases-use-trying-comfort-someone.html#ixzz2kzMtmJvf

"Pain is just weakness leaving the body".....and I thought I was in a bad mood before....:mad:

eisenberg1

OldNotWIse wrote: »

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2507633/Get-grip-pull-voted-annoying-phrases-use-trying-comfort-someone.html#ixzz2kzMtmJvf

"Pain is just weakness leaving the body".....and I thought I was in a bad mood before....:mad:

"Time heals all wounds"................it does in my arshe!!

OldNotWIse

"Iss-ewe" :mad: Issue for fuuck sake. IH-SHOE!!!

OldNotWIse

eisenberg1 wrote: »

"Time heals all wounds"................it does in my arshe!!

Or "if it doesn't kill you it will make you stronger". More like, if it doesn't kill you it will at best leave you bitter and cynical and at worst wishing it had.

eisenberg1

OldNotWIse wrote: »

"Iss-ewe" :mad: Issue for fuuck sake. IH-SHOE!!!

On par with "tiss-ewe":D