Chuck Norris!

murphzor

**** Chuck Norris.
**** everyone in this thread.
**** me.

the groutch

Chuck Norris pushed Batman down to #2 on Commissioner Gordon's speed dial.

Topper Harley

Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It's not dead, it's just afraid to move.

Chuck Norris was once bitten by a King Cobra. But after five days of agonising pain, the cobra died.

Where To wrote: »

I don't think Chuck Norris is a very nice person and I'm not one bit afraid of him.

Closed account...uh oh. :eek:

Chairman Meow

Wow, a Chuck Norris thread in the year of our lord two thousand and thirteen.

Up next, Tay Zonday performing his latest sensation, "Chocolate Rain".

Cee-Jay-Cee

Chuck Norris lit one if his farts and created the Big Bang.

the groutch

They made a Chuck Norris toilet roll.
But it didnt sell because it didn't take sh*t from anyone.

GOOSEPAUL

The only person to have survived a Chuck Norris round house kick was Steven Hawkings!!!:eek:

michael.dublin

When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side

pabloh999

Chuck Norris is a right wing nutjob who said "if Obama is reelected it will bring 1,000 years of darkness"

He also said if faced with a burgular in his home , "sure, i could use my roundhouse kick" but id rather use a gun.. real tough guy alright

DB Cooper 23

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of water

Push Pop

Wow, 6 pages in and no one has mentioned these 2 which I think are definitely in the top 5:

1. Chuck Norris was born feet first so he could round house the doctor in the head for looking at his mothers vagina!!

2. Chuck Norris walked down the street and got an erection. There were no survivors.

warehouse1

chuck norris once got bit by a rattlesnake after three days of excruciating pain and agony the rattlesnake died.

keano_afc

Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead, its just afraid to move.

Chuck Norris can cut a hot knife with butter.

StompToWork

Superman wears Chuck Norris pyjamas.

michael.dublin

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

the purple tin

Chuck Norris is one of the worst actors in history.

michael.dublin

Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

michael.dublin

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.