Children these days in cars watching DVD players

CaraMay

The Reamer wrote: »

Generally I think kids these days are much less well behaved and often parents (my sister included) couldn't care less.

Indeed.

ezra_pound

Remember the film walle!

Edit: one in five children in Ireland is overweight or obese.

The Reamer

ezra_pound wrote: »

As a parent I have to agree with op. I find it disturbing how pro media, TV and led screens many parents are. So many seem to buy tvs for their young kids to put in their bedroom. I just find that wrong. TV in bedroom, TV in living room. TV in car.

I agree 100%. My sister relies hugely on the TV to keep the kids entertained. If it's turned off there is a right ruccus. Even yesterday I was over at hers and had her 5 year old pounding on my laptop keyboard going "peppa peppa peppa". I think it's wrong altogether.

And my mother said it to her yesterday evening and suddenly she was labelled the biggest bitch ever!

I find that today's reliance on media devices to keep kids entertained could be resulting in an inability to deal with boredom and short attention spans.

As for TVs and computers in bedrooms, well when I was 10 or 12 a goof few of my peer would have had them but if I had suggested to my folks that I wanted a private TV in my room I'd have been laughed at.

Now as for those posters who chastised me for noticing DVD payers in cars and taking notice of "glorious landscapes" and not concentrating on the road, the answer is I wasn't looking at the road at all really - I was in the passenger seat on the way home. Happy?

zef

I am a parent, and I agree that kids should learn to amuse themselves or read, because from what I see many seem to be dependent on hand held gaming consoles, ipads, etc.
At least with a book you know what your child is reading. Many video games are violent/ misogynistic in nature, and I see some parents allowing 11 yr old kids to buy 18 cert gaming titles. Same with video rentals - the staff know the video/ game is for the kid as she/he has picked it, but dad or older brother is paying and business isn't great so they turn a blind eye I guess.
As a kid I endured weekly car journeys to Kilkenny (2 hours), ok there wern't as many motorways then, or cars on the road probably, (showing my age haha) and I used sing in the back of the car out of boredom. Getting a bag of chips out of a chipper in Kildare halfway home was the highlight of the journey.

ezra_pound

The Reamer wrote: »

I agree 100%. My sister relies hugely on the TV to keep the kids entertained. If it's turned off there is a right ruccus. Even yesterday I was over at hers and had her 5 year old pounding on my laptop keyboard going "peppa peppa peppa". I think it's wrong altogether.

And my mother said it to her yesterday evening and suddenly she was labelled the biggest bitch ever!

I find that today's reliance on media devices to keep kids entertained could be resulting in an inability to deal with boredom and short attention spans.

As for TVs and computers in bedrooms, well when I was 10 or 12 a goof few of my peer would have had them but if I had suggested to my folks that I wanted a private TV in my room I'd have been laughed at.

Now as for those posters who chastised me for noticing DVD payers in cars and taking notice of "glorious landscapes" and not concentrating on the road, the answer is I wasn't looking at the road at all really - I was in the passenger seat on the way home. Happy?

Thanks for supporting my view!

We let our eldest daughter watch telly but we try to keep it low because its not good for children and it's addictive. We find it hard sometimes to wean her off it but thats what parents should do... Intervene and make responsible decisions that children simply cannot make for themselves. I'm sure you agree with your mothers decision not to allow you to have TV in your room. I'm just from a different planet to parents who get TV for their kids in the car and I'm story but I do think that it's bad parenting.

?Cee?view

OP,

Of course you're right. Not popular, but definitely correct.

pwurple

churchview wrote: »

OP,

Of course you're right. Not popular, but definitely correct.

He's not right. In an ideal world we wouldn't have our children in cars at all. We would be playing all day long outside.

But we don't live in an ideal world.

?Cee?view

pwurple wrote: »

He's not right. In an ideal world we wouldn't have our children in cars at all. We would be playing all day long outside.

But we don't live in an ideal world.

"These day's I often despair at the way todays children are living. I'm 26, no old fogie, but when I were a wee chap or 8 or 10 and on a road trip I'd be glued to the window spotting things or looking at the map to see where we're going or pestering my dad as to what's this or that that we saw as we drove along. At the very least, I think it helped me develop a very good sense of geography and at 11 I actually had a very good knowlege of the country's road network.

I consider that a good, interested, normal way for a child to be.

However, these days an enormous number of children travelling in cars seem to be just consumed in some DVD player stuck to a headrest or foostering with a PSP or some other gimmick while being oblivious to the real world and all the interests it could inspire."

I think the best thing is for parents to stimulate a child's interest in the natural or real world rather than rely on the DVD player to "keep them quiet".No offence intended, but where "it will keep em quiet" is the motivation, frankly I would consider that lazy parenting. At the very least it would develop the child's knowledge of the general geography of the region by seeing where's where and what's what. I think kids are missing out on something."


So that's just a portion of what he said in the OP. Can you point out specifically what he has said that is wrong?

ezra_pound

pwurple wrote: »

He's not right. In an ideal world we wouldn't have our children in cars at all. We would be playing all day long outside.

But we don't live in an ideal world.

Now if that treatise on moral philosophy doesn't get me buying two dvd sets for my car I don't know what will!

BostonB

The Reamer wrote: »

....At the very least it would develop the child's knowledge of the general geography of the region by seeing where's where and what's what. I think kids are missing out on something....

You might have had some point before we had motorways. But these big motorways are just bland concrete expanses with an earth bank. Make some generic trees. Quite often you don't see the countryside. Its got like the US, where all roads look the name. You don't go through towns, there can often be nothing to see for ages. You actually have no sense of direction on these roads, and often no sense of speed or travelling. They are boring to drive on, I can only imagine how boring they are for kids.

dark crystal

ezra_pound wrote: »

I'm just from a different planet to parents who get TV for their kids in the car and I'm story but I do think that it's bad parenting.

Just because other people do or view things differently to you, doesn't make them bad parents.

jaykay74

As a parent I find common sense and moderation go a long way. I trust my own judgement. Everything has its place from books, dvd players, pcs, board games etc.

The Reamer

Oh yeah, I fully support my mother criticism of my sisters reliance on the TV to keep the kids happy. I was thinking the same thing but I didn't want to say it to her.
I also now agree with my mothers decision to not give a TV in my room, Well i didn't ask for or want it anyway, but hypothetically.

I guess my thread is not only based around DVDs in cars - it's moreso the general tendency to rely on media devices these days to keep kids occupied.
Im 26, but in my day we had the playstation but were only allowed it for a few hours a week or if it was raining and were expected to occupy ourselves outside playing football or walking in the fields or otherwise occupying ourselves at other times. We accepted it and TBH didn't really want to spend all day in front of a screen.

These days' kids are content to spend a whole day vegetating in front of a playstation or a TV and worse altogether, the parents are even more content to let them at it if it keeps them quiet.

No wonder there is so much child obesity and ADHD type things in the last 10 years. An obese child or ADHD was unheard of when I was in school and that was only 14 years ago.

?Cee?view

jaykay74 wrote: »

As a parent I find common sense and moderation go a long way. I trust my own judgement. Everything has its place from books, dvd players, pcs, board games etc.

Agreed, but unfortunately for many children it has become the norm to have DVD players in cars. The effect on their cognitive development is ignored.

dzer2

We have a set for long journeys abroad, we rarely use them in Ireland as the trip wouldnt be long enough. We have 5 kids and they have no problem keeping themselves entertained but the noise level in the car would drive you to distraction. even on the long trips we take the kids would ask where we are, what town or city are we close to and even know the road numbers. If there was something of interest that we think they should see we would point it out to them. When you are on unfamiliar roads a bit of quiet helps the concentration

?Cee?view

dzer2 wrote: »

We have a set for long journeys abroad, we rarely use them in Ireland as the trip wouldnt be long enough. We have 5 kids and they have no problem keeping themselves entertained but the noise level in the car would drive you to distraction. even on the long trips we take the kids would ask where we are, what town or city are we close to and even know the road numbers. If there was something of interest that we think they should see we would point it out to them. When you are on unfamiliar roads a bit of quiet helps the concentration

...and the situation you describe is in stark contrast to the people who can't be bothered interacting with their young ones when they're commuting to and from work, school etc. I used to ride a scooter in Dublin. When filtering or at lights you could see into cars more clearly than you would if in another car. The amount of kids on the "schoolrun" staring zombie like into screens was horrifying.

ezra_pound

jaykay74 wrote: »

As a parent I find common sense and moderation go a long way. I trust my own judgement. Everything has its place from books, dvd players, pcs, board games etc.

Absolutely. Is moderation getting a dvd for the back of car?

ezra_pound

dark crystal wrote: »

Just because other people do or view things differently to you, doesn't make them bad parents.

Absolutely. I have no authority on determining what bad parenting is.



But as I explained my philosophy is that good parents make responsible decisions for their children when those children simply can't make that decision. That is why children need parents. Furthermore I believe that putting a TV screen in a car in front of your child leaves them no choice but to watch it and is the antithesis of a readiness to intervene and make the call for your child that they have had enough TV.

ezra_pound

dzer2 wrote: »

We have a set for long journeys abroad, we rarely use them in Ireland as the trip wouldnt be long enough. We have 5 kids and they have no problem keeping themselves entertained but the noise level in the car would drive you to distraction. even on the long trips we take the kids would ask where we are, what town or city are we close to and even know the road numbers. If there was something of interest that we think they should see we would point it out to them. When you are on unfamiliar roads a bit of quiet helps the concentration

This sounds completely reasonable to me! I would use one myself on the same circumstances.

Bishop_Donal

The Reamer wrote: »

These day's I often despair at the way todays children are living. I'm 26, no old fogie, but when I were a wee chap or 8 or 10 and on a road trip I'd be glued to the window spotting things or looking at the map to see where we're going or pestering my dad as to what's this or that that we saw as we drove along. At the very least, I think it helped me develop a very good sense of geography and at 11 I actually had a very good knowlege of the country's road network.

I consider that a good, interested, normal way for a child to be.

However, these days an enormous number of children travelling in cars seem to be just consumed in some DVD player stuck to a headrest or foostering with a PSP or some other gimmick while being oblivious to the real world and all the interests it could inspire.

I have no children (nor do I intend to have them, not really my thing) but if I did, I would not be going down the DVD player/ PSP route on car journeys. I think the best thing is for parents to stimulate a child's interest in the natural or real world rather than rely on the DVD player to "keep them quiet".No offence intended, but where "it will keep em quiet" is the motivation, frankly I would consider that lazy parenting. At the very least it would develop the child's knowledge of the general geography of the region by seeing where's where and what's what. I think kids are missing out on something.

Does anyone else feel this way about this issue?

These days lots of people in their 70's and 80's can't get their heads around the idea of 26 year olds spending their lives in front of computers posting their opinions on Social Media sites, but there ya go (maybe they are missing out on something good even though they don't know it).

jaykay74

ezra_pound wrote: »

Absolutely. Is moderation getting a dvd for the back of car?

Not for example during the school run which is 10 car journeys a week. But if we are say going to Gothenburg for the weekend I have no problem with a movie to break up the journey. I would say it is for "event" trips rather than daily day to day type trips. Thats what works for us anyway.

The risks this exposes to their cognitive development are fine by me :pac:

?Cee?view

jaykay74 wrote: »

The risks this exposes to their cognitive development are fine by me :pac:

I'd say they'll be fine if they're not constantly glued!

Seriously though, when you read up on some of the effects that prolonged exposure to screens (TV, games etc.) has on kids, it's scary stuff. While you'd expect the developmental issues and they're documented and researched extensively, I've relatively recently heard talk amongst psychologists and child psychiatrists of issues with children whose language skills and social skills are compromised.

ezra_pound

Bishop_Donaare"l wrote: »

These days lots of people in their 70's and 80's can't get their heads around the idea of 26 year olds spending their lives in front of computers posting their opinions on Social Media sites, but there ya go (maybe they are missing out on something good even though they don't know it).

Yes, and the weather in Moscow, I hear...

26 year olds are adults. Children are children. Parents are responsible for children. Children need help and protection from parents. This is a parenting forum. It has nothing to do with out of touch generational divides. Rather it's an ethical question: is it right to have dvds in cars for young children?

ezra_pound

jaykay74 wrote: »

Not for example during the school run which is 10 car journeys a week. But if we are say going to Gothenburg for the weekend I have no problem with a movie to break up the journey. I would say it is for "event" trips rather than daily day to day type trips. Thats what works for us anyway.

The risks this exposes to their cognitive development are fine by me :pac:

I agree with you. That sounds moderate. I see allot of TV screens in cars driving around Dublin and I don't think they're going that far!

pwurple

ezra_pound wrote: »

I agree with you. That sounds moderate. I see allot of TV screens in cars driving around Dublin and I don't think they're going that far!

How on earth do you know how far they are going? I know people who commute on a daily basis from carlow to dublin. With children in the car. Every Livelong Day.

I am in the extremely lucky position to be employed in a very good job, have a child, have sold a house that was not stuck in negative equity in order to rent a place nearer to work and schools.

There are plenty of others not in such a lucky position, and there is no way I will be judging them.

It is not bad parenting to keep your children alive. Phones are illegal in a car, for a reason. They distract you from driving. I would prefer someone to have a DVD keeping everyone happy and quiet in the back of a car, rather than see a pile of dead toddlers in a car wreck.

ezra_pound

pwurple wrote: »

How on earth do you know how far they are going? I know people who commute on a daily basis from carlow to dublin. With children in the car. Every Livelong Day.

I am in the extremely lucky position to be employed in a very good job, have a child, have sold a house that was not stuck in negative equity in order to rent a place nearer to work and schools.

There are plenty of others not in such a lucky position, and there is no way I will be judging them.

It is not bad parenting to keep your children alive. Phones are illegal in a car, for a reason. They distract you from driving. I would prefer someone to have a DVD keeping everyone happy and quiet in the back of a car, rather than see a pile of dead toddlers in a car wreck.

Absolutely agree with you. I would never condone using a mobile phone while driving. Likewise I abhor drink driving and bad drivers. Look I'm a parent so I understand how hard it can be to live day to day. Moderation moderation moderation. If someone on long commutes uses dvds I dint want to make them feel bad about it. I do agree with the op that there is something wrong with driving around beautiful scenery with kids in back watching dvd. Further this is symptomatic of tvs encroaching into kids bedrooms and a tolerance of constant TV in kids lives.

RedXIV

Ok I think this is starting to get a bit ridiculous.

The amount of people citing studies that watching tv destroys mind etc, lets be honest here, how many of you have ACTUALLY researched this? I mean more than 5 mins on google?

I've studied this quite a lot in terms of what effect screen exposure has to people and the potential long term effects.

Are all the people here who are condoning screen exposure aware that for example, there is a DIRECT link () see here, fully documented that the increase in video games in the last 30 years has been matched to a decrease in juvenile crime rates? the link is there and it has been well documented.

Are people aware of the screening that children's media goes through? It's almost impossible to release something that isn't educational as a children's tv show.

To the poster who said a book would be better as "at least they would be reading", do you realise most handheld games require the user to read? and not just read, use hand eye coordination, problem solving skills and analytical processes to complete the game? Your kid will get a better mental workout from a game than a book. It may go against the grain but there you go.

If you think about it, what you are doing is trying to stifle change. We're actually not that long from a time when reading was seen as "a waste of time".

In an increasingly digital world, parents who choose to deliberately isolate their children from technology are doing them no favours. Innovation has been made to solve a problem i.e. boredom and even to the poster who said "children should learn to deal with boredom".....why? why would you want your children to ever be bored?

Think about it, a DVD player in the back of the car with David Attenborough documentaries doesn't sound like a bad thing, if anything its more interesting that watching the N11 anyway

cyning

OP I think even eight months ago I would have agreed with you 100%. I have a 7 month old. Until that little person comes into your life you have no idea how you will do things. I swore she would never watch tv: some days Baby Jake or baby tv which she adores means I get 10 minutes to eat breakfast/lunch. I was not giving her toys to play with in car that made noise: trust me a screaming baby is far more distracting then a singing teddy bear! If I had a choice on a long (or even longish) car journey between a DVD player or a crying toddler/child especially in the dark I know what I'll choose. I think it's so easy to say (and everyone including me does it) that you would never do x, y or z. But reality can be so different. No kids don't need and shouldn't be glued to TVs or computers but sometimes is fine

Also if you ever get caught in roadworks with a screaming baby for 20 minutes in the dark where there is nothing you can do you probably won't be long changing your mind: I know it did for me

Thoie

Were all our parents just saints that they managed to take us on long trips in cars (probably without seatbelts) without either leaving "piles of dead toddlers" around the place (from entertaining us) or going mad from all the questions we asked?

Moonbeam

My kids are all only young and our longest journeys are about 2 1/2 hours so no need for anything more then their cds, I do not think that I would buy in car cd players for the kids while in Ireland but if were doing the 8/9 hour journeys across France that we did as kids I would be all in favour of them!!