Arriving Irish Houseshare Etiquette?

Batgurl

I've been on here before having a moan about this particular topic so have decided to be proactive and get opinions so me and my new housemates can firm up some basic ground rules.

We are all Irish, working full time (457 or PR) and have been here a couple of years. However, with the constant influx of Irish still arriving on WHV, it is understandable that we regularly get requests from friends/relatives/people we know etc for a place to crash "til they get set up". Now as all seasoned IrishAussies know, that can take a longer than anticipated and that friend crashing "til they get set up" can turn into an annoying additional housemate so we are looking for ground rules to put in place in our house share for this frequent query.

Main questions are:

-how long is acceptable for friends to crash?
-must they keep to bedrooms or is the living area fair game to set up camp?
-should rent be contributed to? Or bills?
-what is the acceptable maximum number per person at any one time?
-is it okay to limit how many times a person has someone stay?

My opinions are 3 days max, living room is off limits, shouldnt have to pay rent or bills as person inviting them needs to foot that burden, one person only at a time (two max in special circumstances but NO couples) and I reckon twice a year is the limit.

Can anyone else shed light on what they think? What they have in place in their houseshare? Am I being too harsh? Anything I forgot or should add further?

rightyabe

Batgurl wrote: »

I've been on here before having a moan about this particular topic so have decided to be proactive and get opinions so me and my new housemates can firm up some basic ground rules.

We are all Irish, working full time (457 or PR) and have been here a couple of years. However, with the constant influx of Irish still arriving on WHV, it is understandable that we regularly get requests from friends/relatives/people we know etc for a place to crash "til they get set up". Now as all seasoned IrishAussies know, that can take a longer than anticipated and that friend crashing "til they get set up" can turn into an annoying additional housemate so we are looking for ground rules to put in place in our house share for this frequent query.

Main questions are:

-how long is acceptable for friends to crash?
-must they keep to bedrooms or is the living area fair game to set up camp?
-should rent be contributed to? Or bills?
-what is the acceptable maximum number per person at any one time?
-is it okay to limit how many times a person has someone stay?

My opinions are 3 days max, living room is off limits, shouldnt have to pay rent or bills as person inviting them needs to foot that burden, one person only at a time (two max in special circumstances but NO couples) and I reckon twice a year is the limit.

Can anyone else shed light on what they think? What they have in place in their houseshare? Am I being too harsh? Anything I forgot or should add further?

3 days is a bit short. 3 weeks would be reasonable. Pay rent after that if the room is available. Add maybe $30 a week for bills/use of your furniture etc into the rent.

We had a overstayer for 10 weeks!! Zero rent, ate us out of house and home. Bought us a pint the night before she left. We just split our shopping bill in 3, but she ate a good 70% of it!

Coileach dearg

I'd say 'No' straight up. Unless it's family.
Anybody who can afford a plane ticket out here should have the responsibility to get 'set up' when they get here.
Anyone who is serious about travelling or working in a different country must be willing to take the risk of doing what the rest of us did when we got here, starting from scratch. Or those who are coming for a holiday should have the$5000 in the bank account so they can afford to fly back home if things go belly up.
Is it any wonder there are clowns coming over (like the Perth stabbing thread for example) who think they can waltz in off the plane and crash at a friends place and do as they please.
The shoe up the hole the likes of these people would need.

Zambia

I stayed with my mate for a month when I first arrived. My wife was with me. Being able to stay there absolutely brilliant, Made everything so much easier.

Batgurl I think you're just too popular?

Unless you really close probably should only let them stay a couple of days

karl bracken

Ud have to give them more than 3 days sure you would only be getting over the jetlag then.

1 week then there paying bills and rent, and not just splitting their mates rent, splitting total rent and bills. Then there paying a decent share and getting less for it so extra motivation to leave...
2 of my mates were coming over and i had accomodation details of places for them to stay and they were only here 2 nights so help them out your the expert for your area

Stay in mates bedroom on a blowup theres nothing worse than coming in and someone always on the couch asleep after your working all day

I think limiting how much someone can stay over is fairly harsh thats like saying your friends can only come over friday and saturday night!
Im looking at this from someone having their partner staying point of view, unless you have a serious gaf and all your mates wana stay all the time lol then tell them fook off unless your out and they stay after a few drinks which is cool

Remember we all need a helping hand and some day you may need a friends gaf....

Sundy

The one that gets me is the 'friend' who sleeps on the couch who cant afford a hostel but can afford to buy cigarettes and go out and get pissed 2 or 3 times a week.

Having said that I have had loads of people crash since I moved over a year ago. Mostly once they contribute to the house, ie they are not a guest so are expected to clean up cook etc, buy beers.

Id have no problem marching someone out either, its my house!

Batgurl

Haha wish it was that I was too popular.

It's just as I said, it's a house mates thing and as we are all from different areas of Ireland, we'll all be asked by different people at different stages and its best to have basic rules in place.

If I was living on my own I'd have no problems letting people stay as long as they want but when other people are also in the house, I think basic consideration needs to be taken into account. No one likes coming home after a hard day at work and having to sit with a stranger watching tv or whatever.

While I'd love to accommodate everyone who asks me, I don't think its fair to impose on my house mates for long periods of time. By the same hat, I'd be pissed off if I was paying rent and bills to basically accommodate a complete stranger for a prolonged period of time.

So some people are saying I'm being too mean with three days and others are saying its too long? Maybe a week for family and everyone else three days??? I'm glad most people seem to agree that communal areas should be off-limits as sleeping quarters...thats a huge no-no for me and I'd hate to have to compromise on that.

jackbhoy

Batgurl wrote: »

So some people are saying I'm being too mean with three days and others are saying its too long? Maybe a week for family and everyone else three days??? I'm glad most people seem to agree that communal areas should be off-limits as sleeping quarters...thats a huge no-no for me and I'd hate to have to compromise on that.

Personally I think you are being very reasonable. Have no issue putting someone up for a few days to help until they get over jetlag and find their feet but they should have the cop on to move to hostel after a few days. If they don't then I have no issuing dropping some unsubtle hints that it's time to vamoose.

Also agree on communal areas. If you want to put someone up and you share a house, then the very least you can do is let them kip on your bedroom floor, so they don't wreck everyone else's head.

To me this all seems like common courtesy. But I suppose like sense, it's actually not that common.

c0rk3r

Batgurl wrote: »

Main questions are:

1-how long is acceptable for friends to crash?
2-must they keep to bedrooms or is the living area fair game to set up camp?
3-should rent be contributed to? Or bills?
4-what is the acceptable maximum number per person at any one time?
-5is it okay to limit how many times a person has someone stay?

1-It's all dependent on what kinda of accommodation your living in. If i was living on my own they could stay as long as they liked without taking the piss of course. Im in your position except staying with ozzies and i dont think i could accomnodate people coming over. I don't think 3 days is enough time to get on your feet over here. You've to find accommodation, open up your bank account, sort out your tax file number, transfer licenses, buy an Aus phone, apply for jobs etc etc. I reckon 1 week is enough to find your feet / move on. Even if that means moving to a hostel. You've got to be aware of your housemates feelings, its their home and not just a house to crash. I came over here on my own without friends or family and it was tough but you realise if you want things done the only person to rely on is yourself. Theres no safety net here, either sink or swim.

2-Setting up camp in the living room in shared house is an absolute no from me.

3-Rent... hrmm. No but a simple gift at the end like a bottle of wine or a card saying thank you to everyone in the house would be enough for me.

4-One person, Your home isnt a railway station with friends constantly coming or going.

5-If you discuss it amongst yourselfs and everyone is cool with it then no problem. In saying that if 5 friends of one guy passed through the house throughout the year it would be taking the piss in my view.

Id help people as much as I could if they came over. Its a massive benefit to have someone there as support as Oz can but tough at times. Not everyone makes it over here. I met a guy whilst doing my regional work who had 52 cent in his bank account ! It can take up to a month to secure work in which your funds are constantly being depleted. Ive been unbelieveably fortunate/lucky on my travels thus far but thats not the case for everyone.

Lucifer-0

It sounds like some people don't really understand or appreciate what a huge benefit it is to be put up by someone.

I recently arrived in Sydney and I only know one or two here, but not very well.
I wouldn't even dream of asking them to put me up, so I stayed in a hostel for the first 12 days I was there. I spent an enormous amount of money (yes I was drinking) and got almost no sleep some nights.

Luckily I got a job starting next week so yesterday I started renting a room.

Arriving here and being looked after by a friend/family member means you have a much longer shot at making it before the cash runs out imo.

The Aussie

I used to run a bit of a open house policy before I had children, there was more than 15 people stay with us in that time, could be a few more as some you remember for good bad bad reasons and some you forget about

The only real house rules were.

1. No Piss Ups in the house on Work Nights.

2. If it ain't yours, Ask. Applies to everything

3. If your Sleeping in Communal Areas i.e. on the Couch, don't expect a sleep in when other people get up, and all your gear is to be packed away when you get up, I don't want to be looking at dirty Jocks.

The last one led to me having a Kiwi living under my stairs for almost 3 months.

Batgurl

Lucifer-0 wrote: »

Arriving here and being looked after by a friend/family member means you have a much longer shot at making it before the cash runs out imo.

Look I'm not denying that it would be nice to be looked after when u arrive and if I had a place of my own I gladly would.... within reason but my original post was about being in a house share because in this situation it's not just you putting them up, it's expecting virtual strangers to subsidise your mates living for weeks on end.

Rochester

After a recent and on going situation here in Ireland with relatives taking the pi**, I am done with people staying in my home.