St Brigid's Orphanage The Coombe

Vpd

Was anyone fostered/adopted through St Brigid's Orphanage Dublin in 1970's?

moihugs

Yeah Vpd I was in 1973!

Vpd

Did you ever try to trace your birth parents through St Brigid's?

moihugs wrote: »

Yeah Vpd I was in 1973!

moihugs

Yeah Vpd I did back in id say 1994-95. Dealt with Sir Benigius or now known as Sr Mary McDonagh. She tried her best to put me off searching , I was young and decided that the non-identifing info was enough. Then last yr I got really curious again ,suppose had heard of a few reunions that had worked! So wondered was she still there or was there a sw etc!! Found out though that they are not an acredited agency anymore and cant trace etc for u! The files are meant to be moved to the hse but havent as yet. Decided to search on my own and am now in contact via letter and text with my bm. Vpd were u adopted through St Brigids?

Vpd

Yes I was long term fostered through st Brigids and finally adopted in 1976. I contacted Mary mc Donagh in 1999 and she apparently contacted my bm who allegedly sent a letter threatening legal action if she was contacted again. I have to say I am not fully convinced a letter was ever sent as Mary mcdonagh seemed to be covering up for something. Have been in touch with hse and waiting for transfer of my file. Hopefully something will come of it. How did you contact your bm? And thank you so much for your response..

moihugs wrote: »

Yeah Vpd I did back in id say 1994-95. Dealt with Sir Benigius or now known as Sr Mary McDonagh. She tried her best to put me off searching , I was young and decided that the non-identifing info was enough. Then last yr I got really curious again ,suppose had heard of a few reunions that had worked! So wondered was she still there or was there a sw etc!! Found out though that they are not an acredited agency anymore and cant trace etc for u! The files are meant to be moved to the hse but havent as yet. Decided to search on my own and am now in contact via letter and text with my bm. Vpd were u adopted through St Brigids?

moihugs

Hopefully u will get the answers u need when the file is transferred. That gives u so many questions doesnt it? Very posssible that she never contacted her at all. I was in contact with Sr Mary about a yr ago to see if my bm ever wrote etc and to get in writting that my bm was a married woman in 1973. Sr Mary hasnt changed a bit!! I was a lot stronger and more fit to deal with her though. Vpd I sent a very non descript letter to my bm telling her that this was the name she gave me at birth and that would love to meet up etc and here is my name address and phone no, nobody else would have understood what I was on about. She is gradually softening down and knows im not going to arrive and parade around her area shaming her. None of her children or partner know about me which im not sure if she ever intends to tell them. Wouldnt ask her in a text and hoping to meet in the next few months so the questions will flow then. I have no wish to be announced as her daughter to the entire area but dont think I can remain the secret to my siblings, whether they would be interested or not ,as adults they are entitled to know. I know what they all look like there kids names etc, they are all on fb. One of them lives very close to me and we have mutual friends. I had a very good adoption lovely people... but found I never quite fitted with my a mums side. My a dads side was and is different we are very close. Best of luck fingers crossed for u that those files are with the hse very soon.

Vpd

Oh my God that is unbelievable..that is great that she is open to some contact. Strange that you can see your siblings on FB. I would imagine that they would welcome you though. I am glad you had a nice adoptive family. My situation was a bit different - my adoptive parents were only 19 and 21 when they got me. I am beginning to think that something illegal went on as I don't think people that young would be given a baby to adopt. My fostering was never disclosed to HSE and everything was taken care of by the nuns. All very cloak and dagger. Sr Begnigus also told me that my BM had given another baby up for adoption to them two years after me. In my non identifying info she told me my birth forename however there is no record of me in General Records. How did u find your BM's name and address.?

moihugs wrote: »

Hopefully u will get the answers u need when the file is transferred. That gives u so many questions doesnt it? Very posssible that she never contacted her at all. I was in contact with Sr Mary about a yr ago to see if my bm ever wrote etc and to get in writting that my bm was a married woman in 1973. Sr Mary hasnt changed a bit!! I was a lot stronger and more fit to deal with her though. Vpd I sent a very non descript letter to my bm telling her that this was the name she gave me at birth and that would love to meet up etc and here is my name address and phone no, nobody else would have understood what I was on about. She is gradually softening down and knows im not going to arrive and parade around her area shaming her. None of her children or partner know about me which im not sure if she ever intends to tell them. Wouldnt ask her in a text and hoping to meet in the next few months so the questions will flow then. I have no wish to be announced as her daughter to the entire area but dont think I can remain the secret to my siblings, whether they would be interested or not ,as adults they are entitled to know. I know what they all look like there kids names etc, they are all on fb. One of them lives very close to me and we have mutual friends. I had a very good adoption lovely people... but found I never quite fitted with my a mums side. My a dads side was and is different we are very close. Best of luck fingers crossed for u that those files are with the hse very soon.

moihugs

That sounds like it was totally illegal Vpd, have something in my head about not being fit to adopt till u were 25 but I could be wrong. The fact that ur fostering wasnt disclosed to the hse looks like it was totally illegal! How did u get on with ur adoptive parents and family? My adoptive parents were almost 50 when I came along so we were the complete opposite. They always seemed so much younger though, unfortunately they passed away quite a few years back. Finding my bm address was fun knew about 3 of the kids but knew that the address of the 3rd was no longer there so was at a total dead end. Decided to go back to the gro and search maybe for another sibling or even another sibling for my bm that might lead me somewhere. Found another sibling for me and an address. Looked on the thoms dublin st directory for I think 2011 and she was at the same address. Had great help on fb as well the adoption rights alliance were brilliant and one person in particular seemed to have all the answers and ways to go with my search. Vpd seeing my siblings and their families on fb has been the best part so far to be honest. I know who my family and myself look like. Everybody always said that our kids were like my husbands side that only one looked like me..well wrong!! I can claim another 2 on my side.. the spit of my brothers! Its good but its also sad I missed out on growing up with them for whatever reason. Dont think I quite belong with them or now with my adoptive parents deceased with my adoptive family. The joys of adoption?? Take care of yourself and let me know how u get on.

Vpd

Thanks so much for your time and responses, they have been very helpful. Let me know when you get to meet your bm and I will keep you posted of my situation.

Take care

moihugs wrote: »

Hopefully u will get the answers u need when the file is transferred. That gives u so many questions doesnt it? Very posssible that she never contacted her at all. I was in contact with Sr Mary about a yr ago to see if my bm ever wrote etc and to get in writting that my bm was a married woman in 1973. Sr Mary hasnt changed a bit!! I was a lot stronger and more fit to deal with her though. Vpd I sent a very non descript letter to my bm telling her that this was the name she gave me at birth and that would love to meet up etc and here is my name address and phone no, nobody else would have understood what I was on about. She is gradually softening down and knows im not going to arrive and parade around her area shaming her. None of her children or partner know about me which im not sure if she ever intends to tell them. Wouldnt ask her in a text and hoping to meet in the next few months so the questions will flow then. I have no wish to be announced as her daughter to the entire area but dont think I can remain the secret to my siblings, whether they would be interested or not ,as adults they are entitled to know. I know what they all look like there kids names etc, they are all on fb. One of them lives very close to me and we have mutual friends. I had a very good adoption lovely people... but found I never quite fitted with my a mums side. My a dads side was and is different we are very close. Best of luck fingers crossed for u that those files are with the hse very soon.

moihugs

Vpd wrote: »

Was anyone fostered/adopted through St Brigid's Orphanage Dublin in 1970's?

Dont agree with St Brigids Orphanage Vpd not knocking u though in anyway. How many of us were orphans our parents were not deceased!!

Wife77

Yes my husband was adopted in 1977 , we've been together since we where 16 so I've been threw the whole process of finding his birth parents. We visited brigid's on a number of occasions an always got the run around, never new when to believe sister benignus , did get some basic info but nothing much . He found his birth parents himself . On our last visit they told my husband a baby girl was given up 18 months after him by his birth mother, however they couldn't arrange contact because the birth mother had to give permission , she didn't want contact so that was that option out the window. Sad really because they said his adopted sister had been in touch a couple of months previous but wasn't told my husband existed because they don't volunteer info ! You have to ask ! Makes me sick , messin with people's life's . They did give a name for his sister but we haven't been able to trace her.

trixy

Hi wife 77
I was in same position , got letter I had sibling adopted year before me. I will post tomorrow how I found him, no contact, he not interested yet but maybe one day.

It's easily done, unfortunately we all have to learn how to become detectives.

The reason I will post tomorrow, I will be on keyboard, lot easier:)

trixy

Hi wife 77

If you have your birth surname and look up the records again for the timeframe your OH sibling was born you will find another record. It should stand out as the surname on both father and mother should be the same. You may end up with more than one. If you have over so many you may have to write off for the birth certs as you only allowed so may in Irish life mall(about 5 euro each), once you get these you will have date of births.

Once you have date of births, there is a book in Irish Life mall behind counter but they have no issue giving it to anyone who asks, its a book of all adopted people.

This is where it takes a bit longer, you just look up all date of births and you will find 'adopted name', once you have adopted name you either try and search yourself or advise agency you have the name yourself and can they help

Hope this helps
Trixy

Vpd

Hi thank you for your response..it's a very similar story to mine. I had the same sort if feedback from sr binignus. I was also told a baby boy had been given up two years later but I couldn't contact him. This might help u to know that as st Brigids is no longer accredited their files are being transferred to the HSE in Waterford. It might be worth contacting them as they can put you in touch with any siblings now without birth mother's consent.

quote="Wife77;83738115"]Yes my husband was adopted in 1977 , we've been together since we where 16 so I've been threw the whole process of finding his birth parents. We visited brigid's on a number of occasions an always got the run around, never new when to believe sister benignus , did get some basic info but nothing much . He found his birth parents himself . On our last visit they told my husband a baby girl was given up 18 months after him by his birth mother, however they couldn't arrange contact because the birth mother had to give permission , she didn't want contact so that was that option out the window. Sad really because they said his adopted sister had been in touch a couple of months previous but wasn't told my husband existed because they don't volunteer info ! You have to ask ! Makes me sick , messin with people's life's . They did give a name for his sister but we haven't been able to trace her.[/quote]

Vpd

Thank you Trixy unfortunately I don't have my birth surname.

trixy wrote: »

Hi wife 77

If you have your birth surname and look up the records again for the timeframe your OH sibling was born you will find another record. It should stand out as the surname on both father and mother should be the same. You may end up with more than one. If you have over so many you may have to write off for the birth certs as you only allowed so may in Irish life mall(about 5 euro each), once you get these you will have date of births.

Once you have date of births, there is a book in Irish Life mall behind counter but they have no issue giving it to anyone who asks, its a book of all adopted people.

This is where it takes a bit longer, you just look up all date of births and you will find 'adopted name', once you have adopted name you either try and search yourself or advise agency you have the name yourself and can they help

Hope this helps
Trixy

Enda63

Wife77,

they don't need BM's permission to make contact with anyone. They use every excuse in the book to keep people apart. The Trace Docs on here will show you how to get your hubbys birth cert and locate his sisters too. If you're on FB, Adoption Rights Alliance have a group there with very good support and advice or you can get in touch with them off FB www.adoptionrightsalliance.com

shezzie

Hey, I used sr.mary of st.brigids. was adopted in 1977. She gave me a few lines of non I'd info and contacted my bm, I got a few stippits more from that, she gave the order of siblings wrong so I could have had a needle in a hay stack there. She told me a few half truths which would put you of and kept telling me she was ringing and ringing with no answers. So stubborn me went of to gro irish life mall and got my original birth cert slip and found her sister and parents ones too. After I searched all manor of places to an internment site and found her sister and parents were deceased so I eventually through many circles contacted the caretaker of the graveyard and thankfully he knew my aunt which meant he knew my bm so he told me who she was married too and where lived, was straight on eircom.ie and found her phone number and found her. Wrote to her 5 years ago her letter would have arrived on my 31st birthday and 2 days later she rang me, we have met twice and been on phone a few times, have not heard from her since jan 2012 but I am stubborn and won't give up, so never ever give up and don't any agency but just use em and do your own search.....best of luck...and do try that adoption rights alliance site on fb has great people with great advice...

Wife77

I rang Waterford today an they said there still waiting on files to be transferred from st brigids an to date haven't received one ? They took my husbands details an said they would get in touch as soon as they received it , so i rang the orpanage in the Combe an asked why the files where being retaining , the assistant! Probably the house keeper said she didn't know where I got my information from that the files where not being sent to Waterford , they where not an orpanage anymore but other than that anyone is welcome to come in and chat! So I ask ya !

Itsmeyou

Anybody looking for info about st bridgets can you please pm me Thanks

Wife77

Itsmeyou wrote: »

Anybody looking for info about st bridgets can you please pm me Thanks

Do you know if an when the files are bein sent to Waterford ? I would like to know so we can keep track of it

Vpd

Wife77 files are in the process of being transferred they say they should be there in the next 8 weeks.

Vpd

Wife77 - I can't believe they told you that. I have spoken to the Adoption Board who have confirmed that their agency is no longer accreditted and that the files are definitely being transferred. I have spoken directly to two social workers in HSE in Waterford who have also confirmed this and I have it in writing from them. Please PM me if you would like their names or numbers. It looks like there is a big cover up going on..I wonder what they are trying to hide in St Brigids?????

Vpd

shezzie - thanks for your post. I have today contacted the Adoption Rights Alliance and they have been very very helpful..hopefully this will be the year to answer all my questions! Thanks for your advice.

Wife77

The lady I was talkin to I think was just a house keeper I'd say , the nuns probably haven't discussed the transfer of files with her? ? But the social worker kathy in waterford did say there waiting on them.

Itsmeyou

Wife77 wrote: »

Do you know if an when the files are bein sent to Waterford ? I would like to know so we can keep track of it

Files are not going over and wont for a while .. i have that from the Mother Superior of St bridgets in a email that i recieved from her last week ..... I also have it that she is commited to giving people there non identy Id before they go over

Wife77

I'm happy to report my husband has found his sister , an she is happy to be found , very emotional house today . Hopefully they will meet up soon, this was the last piece of the puzzle for him . Went to the orpanage on Monday , turned out the second name of his sister they gave us four years ago was wrong, took us one day to find and contact her . Amazin

Vpd

That's fantastic news delighted to hear it..

Wife77 wrote: »

I'm happy to report my husband has found his sister , an she is happy to be found , very emotional house today . Hopefully they will meet up soon, this was the last piece of the puzzle for him . Went to the orpanage on Monday , turned out the second name of his sister they gave us four years ago was wrong, took us one day to find and contact her . Amazin

firhouse

Hi,
I just foundthis site and was reading some info on st brigids orphanage posted in March.
If you are all still out there here is some additional info from my point of view.
My adoption goes back to the 1950s. I too have met and spoken to Sr Begninisis and while I was aware she was constrained by legal issues she was helpful to me ; From the letter she gave me i was alble to trace my (still alive) mother but no further luck there .
I have done the Bernardos course for adopted persons its was great well worth doing .
There is a new book out called "CHOSEN":) it is the stories of adopted persons and makes good reading for us all ; There is a seminar around the stories in the book run by Bernardsos on 22 May in Aisling hotel some body might be interested in attending .

Hope this helps.
Firhouse

Itsmeyou

Is that just St bridgets Or all adoptions
There is a new nun looking after it she is the mother superier forom the holy faith if anybody would like to pm me i will give them her info
Thanks

joshcrty

can i join this place im 15?

anneree

I was adopted from st.bridgets in 1972, I dealt with a social worker finola fahy found her helpful and sucessfully made contact with my bm. I really would like to access my file though as I would like to fill in the blanks between my birth and adoption.