Which is better?

Ihatecuddles-old

My name is URL wrote: »

Knowing my luck it'd be on the blob the day I had it.

That is absolutely hilarious

Melion

Ihatecuddles wrote: »

Anybody know what a blow job feels like when her tongue is pierced?

Not as good as when it's pierced twice

Ihatecuddles-old

Melion wrote: »

Not as good as when it's pierced twice

I Really want it done again! I don't think it would suit me though, don't think this one suits me as is!

Paramite Pie

Sex is better.

And for the record, when a girl is suckin' ya off all she's thinking about is not vomiting.

Not cos she's a prude but gag reflex is tough to beat. Try putting your toothbrush all the way back into your mouth (well past your teeth) and you'll feel like gagging.

Kinda takes the fun outta when ya think of it that way!!:P

Cupcake_Crisis

Pixie-Fairy wrote: »

I like waking him up with blow jobs its like "wtf is going on...oohh wait..awwhh yeah"

I love doing that. Seeing that dazed and confused look in their eyes is a big turn on.

kfallon

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

I love doing that. Seeing that dazed and confused look in their eyes is a big turn on.

It works just as well with a ****

Praetorian Saighdiuir

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

I love doing that. Seeing that dazed and confused look in their eyes is a big turn on.

It's true, she does :pac:

--Kaiser--

A young couple are snogging. The young lad asks "Can I have a blow job please?"
"No way!" replies his girlfriend.
"Why not?" he asks
She tells him "You won't respect me afterwards."

Three years later they get engaged. After a celebratory meal at a posh restaurant they go back home and he asks "Can I have a blow job please love?"
"No." She replies "You won't respect me afterwards."

Another three years later they get married. Laid in bed together on their wedding night he asks again "Can I have a blow job please love?"
"No." she replies "You won't respect me afterwards."

Twenty five years later they are sat in bed together. He puts his book onto the bedside cabinet turns to his wife of 25 years and asks "Can I have a blow job please love?"
"No." She replies "You won't respect me afterwards."
He yells back at her. "Look! I've known you for over thirty years! We've been married twenty five years! We've got two kids, one grandson with another on the way. SURELY by now you must realise just how much respect I have for you!"
"Oh OK then." she say "I'll give you a blow job"
.. and she does.

Ten minutes after she is finished the phone rings. Husband turns to his wife and says "Well aren't you going to answer it you cocksucker?"

Cupcake_Crisis

kfallon wrote: »

It works just as well with a ****

That's not nearly as much fun.

Praetorian Saighdiuir wrote: »

It's true, she does :pac:

:eek::eek::eek:

Cupcake_Crisis

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

A young couple are snogging. The young lad asks "Can I have a blow job please?"
"No way!" replies his girlfriend.
"Why not?" he asks
She tells him "You won't respect me afterwards."

Three years later they get engaged. After a celebratory meal at a posh restaurant they go back home and he asks "Can I have a blow job please love?"
"No." She replies "You won't respect me afterwards."

Another three years later they get married. Laid in bed together on their wedding night he asks again "Can I have a blow job please love?"
"No." she replies "You won't respect me afterwards."

Twenty five years later they are sat in bed together. He puts his book onto the bedside cabinet turns to his wife of 25 years and asks "Can I have a blow job please love?"
"No." She replies "You won't respect me afterwards."
He yells back at her. "Look! I've known you for over thirty years! We've been married twenty five years! We've got two kids, one grandson with another on the way. SURELY by now you must realise just how much respect I have for you!"
"Oh OK then." she say "I'll give you a blow job"
.. and she does.

Ten minutes after she is finished the phone rings. Husband turns to his wife and says "Well aren't you going to answer it you cocksucker?"

All lies. There's no way he married her if she never gave him a blowie.

Ihatecuddles-old

Paramite Pie wrote: »

Sex is better.

And for the record, when a girl is suckin' ya off all she's thinking about is not vomiting.

Not cos she's a prude but gag reflex is tough to beat. Try putting your toothbrush all the way back into your mouth (well past your teeth) and you'll feel like gagging.

Kinda takes the fun outta when ya think of it that way!!:P

Not at all....I have a bad gag reflex, cant brush my back teeth without gagging! But I rarely gag when im going down, you just relax your throat and time it right!

kfallon

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

That's not nearly as much fun.

I'll have had my fun.....and that's all that matters :P

Cupcake_Crisis

kfallon wrote: »

I'll have had my fun.....and that's all that matters :P

Yeah, but blow jobs are definitely more fun than a ****!

Gummy Panda

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

Yeah, but blow jobs are definitely more fun than a ****!

But girls like waking to being licked?

Cupcake_Crisis

Gummy Panda wrote: »

But girls like waking to being licked?

I wouldn't kick him outta bed for it

Ihatecuddles-old

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

I wouldn't kick him outta bed for it

I would...cant stand it!

kfallon

Ihatecuddles wrote: »

I would...cant stand it!

Cupcake_Crisis

Ihatecuddles wrote: »

I would...cant stand it!

It's not my favourite either, but at least he'd be making an effort!

Gummy Panda

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

It's not my favourite either, but at least he'd be making an effort!

I'm confused. Women don't like oral?

Cupcake_Crisis

Gummy Panda wrote: »

I'm confused. Women don't like oral?

I'm sure a lot of women love it. I don't hate it, but i could live without it. It's all about the porking.

Ihatecuddles-old

Gummy Panda wrote: »

I'm confused. Women don't like oral?

I hate it, most guys are useless.

Gummy Panda

Hmmm... I've never got any complaints.

Woman are a funny bunch

Cupcake_Crisis

I just find it strange looking down and seeing a big head there. I get the giggles.

Gummy Panda

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

I just find it strange looking down and seeing a big head there. I get the giggles.

Then lie on your belly?

Cupcake_Crisis

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Then lie on your belly?

It's been tried. I just picture what it must look like then and still get the giggles.

Ihatecuddles-old

Steve O wrote: »

Jesus closing the My News thread was a bit harsh

Quiet you, you'll get in trouble!

herisson

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

It's been tried. I just picture what it must look like then and still get the giggles.

Lie at the edge of the bed and lean back.

Im 50/50 on receiving oral. I wouldnt ask for it. But if he wants to ill give it a go. Much prefer giving head tbh.

Cupcake_Crisis

Pixie-Fairy wrote: »

Lie at the edge of the bed and lean back.

Im 50/50 on receiving oral. I wouldnt ask for it. But if he wants to ill give it a go. Much prefer giving head tbh.

Same. Im just such a generous and considerate lover

Steve O

Ihatecuddles wrote: »

Quiet you, you'll get in trouble!

Say what?!...*ahem*...Move along!!...*runs*

Gummy Panda

Pixie-Fairy wrote: »

Lie at the edge of the bed and lean back.

Im 50/50 on receiving oral. I wouldnt ask for it. But if he wants to ill give it a go. Much prefer giving head tbh.

Women are from Venus.

I give up then. You're just getting prodded, poked and maybe some strumming

Cupcake_Crisis

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Women are from Venus.

I give up then. You're just getting prodded, poked and maybe some strumming

That's all we want. And occasionally buy us something pretty.

herisson

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Women are from Venus.

I give up then. You're just getting prodded, poked and maybe some strumming

That sounds grand to me. I'd possibly like an occasional lick though if he was decent at it. Cuddles would also be nice too.

Cupcake_Crisis

Pixie-Fairy wrote: »

That sounds grand to me. I'd possibly like an occasional lick though if he was decent at it. Cuddles would also be nice too.

And tell us we're pretty

herisson

Cupcake_Crisis wrote: »

And tell us we're pretty

This is most important.

Gummy Panda

Pixie-Fairy wrote: »

This is most important.

Okay cuddle, stroke hair and say "you're a pretty girl"

Understood

Cupcake_Crisis

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Okay cuddle, stroke hair and say "you're a pretty girl"

We're not a pet dog....

herisson

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Okay cuddle, stroke hair and say "you're a pretty girl"

Understood

We arent pets ffs. :mad:

Gummy Panda

Pixie-Fairy wrote: »

We arent pets ffs. :mad:

You're a pretty girl

*strokes hair*

irish son

I'm learning so much from ye women on hear, very educational.
So where do ye stand on a finger up the bum during sex? Yeah? No?

Micky Dolenz

Get a room.