Sexism you have personally experienced or have heard of? *READ POST 1*

VinLieger

Hococop wrote: »

i remember reading some article years ago before about an all male golf club, anyway women golfers felt this was sexist to keep it an all male golf club in modern society which is understandable, the golf club understood this and opened to both males and females, yet within a short time of the change made the female golfers complained that they were paying the same fees as male golfers and felt they should be entitled to cheaper fees

Ridiculous that they were up in arms about being let in especially considering the women only gyms that now scatter the country.
But that fees thing is a disgrace, its along the lines of feminists agencies calling for equality while at the same time lobbying for lighter sentencing for women

GalwayGuy2

Schlesinger et al 1992

Zulu

No

Sorry, what? I don't understand your post. You are annoyed the author didn't chastise one of the speakers, is it?

GalwayGuy2

Sorry, what? I don't understand your post. You are annoyed the author didn't chastise one of the speakers, is it?

Hmm, it is a bit incoherent. The case study was quoted and then the author explained the case study in relation to the topic, but didn't really comment on what was actually said.

In retrospect, there could be a million and one reasons why no comment was made, but I really did not expect to see a comment like Speaker 3's in a college textbook.

Galwayguy35

That last quote from speaker 1 caught my attention, is she saying that men would look at a rape scene and we would all say that she was asking for it?

If so that shows a very low opinion of men, rape victims are mens mothers, sisters and daughters so I really don't know why she would think something like that.

iptba

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

That last quote from speaker 1 caught my attention, is she saying that men would look at a rape scene and we would all say that she was asking for it?

If so that shows a very low opinion of men, rape victims are mens mothers, sisters and daughters so I really don't know why she would think something like that.

Yes, it was a misandrous quote. There's quite a lot of misandry around in society but it's not highlighted as much as misogyny.

GalwayGuy2

That last quote from speaker 1 caught my attention, is she saying that men would look at a rape scene and we would all say that she was asking for it?

If so that shows a very low opinion of men, rape victims are mens mothers, sisters and daughters so I really don't know why she would think something like that.

I think it's actually worse, and the last speaker was actually saying that if men watched it, they may start thinking it was okay to rape someone. It's the last "the men around her enjoyed it" quote that gives me that impression.

EDIT: Hmm, for my own anonymity I've actually deleted the post, but I've left the study if anybody wants to look through it.

iptba

I've only just realised there are two GalwayGuys.

Bigtoe107

Couple of weeks ago my friends and I were out having a few drinks we went to a nightclub and ended up getting quite separated anyway I saw my friend and beckoned for him to come over (no easy task on a packed dancefloor) in the process of doing this he walked across some girls while they were trying to take a picture, one of them shouted at him and when he didn't respond drew back and slapped him in the face to the laughs of all her mates.

There was a bouncer standing right behind her and he just shrugged his shoulders even though she nearly floored my friend. This girl looked quite well to do i.e. violence didn't seem a normal thing for her, yet it was clearly alright for her to basically assault my friend

kiffer

No

Bigtoe107 wrote: »

Couple of weeks ago my friends and I were out having a few drinks we went to a nightclub and ended up getting quite separated anyway I saw my friend and beckoned for him to come over (no easy task on a packed dancefloor) in the process of doing this he walked across some girls while they were trying to take a picture, one of them shouted at him and when he didn't respond drew back and slapped him in the face to the laughs of all her mates.

There was a bouncer standing right behind her and he just shrugged his shoulders even though she nearly floored my friend. This girl looked quite well to do i.e. violence didn't seem a normal thing for her, yet it was clearly alright for her to basically assault my friend

Um... by her action there violence does seem to be a normal thing for her...

Bigtoe107

What I meant was she didn't look like a scumbag, I couldn't imagine her fighting after the pub every week yet she didn't equate hitting my friend as violence she saw it as getting him out of the way and getting a few laughs in the process; a bit of harmless fun for the girls.

jaffacakesyum

Bigtoe107 wrote: »

Couple of weeks ago my friends and I were out having a few drinks we went to a nightclub and ended up getting quite separated anyway I saw my friend and beckoned for him to come over (no easy task on a packed dancefloor) in the process of doing this he walked across some girls while they were trying to take a picture, one of them shouted at him and when he didn't respond drew back and slapped him in the face to the laughs of all her mates.

There was a bouncer standing right behind her and he just shrugged his shoulders even though she nearly floored my friend. This girl looked quite well to do i.e. violence didn't seem a normal thing for her, yet it was clearly alright for her to basically assault my friend

Jesus Christ, what a scumbag. And over a fúcking photo

Daveysil15

Bigtoe107 wrote: »

Couple of weeks ago my friends and I were out having a few drinks we went to a nightclub and ended up getting quite separated anyway I saw my friend and beckoned for him to come over (no easy task on a packed dancefloor) in the process of doing this he walked across some girls while they were trying to take a picture, one of them shouted at him and when he didn't respond drew back and slapped him in the face to the laughs of all her mates.

There was a bouncer standing right behind her and he just shrugged his shoulders even though she nearly floored my friend. This girl looked quite well to do i.e. violence didn't seem a normal thing for her, yet it was clearly alright for her to basically assault my friend

If your friend slapped her then I'd bet the bouncer would've moved fairly quickly then. Clubs are shyte since they started integrating cameras into phones. That and facebook tagging.

Festy

Mate of mine was out one night in a nightclub a while back and he had 2 women come up and grope him,not at the same time but they were in a group,he made a complaint to the bouncer about it and the bouncer basically told him not to be soft you should be glad of some female attention.Like WTF ?

What pisses me off is if this was a bloke going around groping women he would be thrown out that club asap and branded a perv,yet if a woman does it everyone laughs and not a word is said to them.

Galwayguy35

Festy wrote: »

Mate of mine was out one night in a nightclub a while back and he had 2 women come up and grope him,not at the same time but they were in a group,he made a complaint to the bouncer about it and the bouncer basically told him not to be soft you should be glad of some female attention.Like WTF ?

What pisses me off is if this was a bloke going around groping women he would be thrown out that club asap and branded a perv,yet if a woman does it everyone laughs and not a word is said to them.

Something similar happened to me years ago and you are right it isn't taken seriously when it happens to a man.

Woodward

No

A friend of mine was kicked out for shouting at a girl who groped him in a club

iptba

A (female) psychology student friend in college told me a few of the female and feminist lecturers in the psychology department (a university in Ireland) were biased against men. She gave an example of a male and female student handing in the same paper and the male getting a II.2 while the female got a high II.1 a few years apart (if I recall correctly, they did this as some sort of experiment, but could have the details wrong - it was a long time ago).

This isn't great evidence and isn't directly to do with me or somebody I directly know but perhaps might remind somebody of something similar (or perhaps not).

Despite being interested in gender issues, I personally would be nervous of doing gender studies courses because I would be concerned my gender, along with my non-acceptance of some feminist views, would come against me getting high marks.

mcpaddington

Haha I can recall 5 times I've had my ass grabbed in nightclubs in recent memory, I don't really care about it to be honest, if they stay and chat all the better but it can be annoying when they try to make a runner in high heels thinking they won't be spotted.

Nightclubs can be interesting places at times, I've been slapped, had an attempt at drink being thrown over me and once even had a woman full out being punching in the stomach multiple times over for the most trivial of things. I like to laugh right at them though, makes them angrier and thus funnier again.

fits

Uhhh, you're reminding me that nightclubs are horrible places. Why would anyone pay into one of these to essentially be molested, drooled on, etc.... Yuck.

GalwayGuy2

Hmmm, not sure if this is sexist, but it's certainly odd.

I saw a card for father's day. At the front it said something along the lines of "I love you Dad. You're always pointing me in the right direction."

And on the inside it had a Victorian looking severe male figure pointing to the left saying "Go ask your Mother".

I don't have children, but I think I'd be a little taken aback if I got a card like that on Father's day

Any person with a child have an opinion on it?

wallycharlo

GalwayGuy2 wrote: »

...I don't have children, but I think I'd be a little taken aback if I got a card like that on Father's day

Any person with a child have an opinion on it?

Sounds like it's just a humorous card to be honest, and I'm pretty sure that it would not be purchased unless the buyer was sure that the father in question possesses the appropriate sense of humour.

GalwayGuy2

Yeah, it was funny and humorous :P But I couldn't help thinking that cards that stereotype women as unable to fix a car are used as proof of inequality.

Maybe when I become a father my outlook will change a little. I just kind of imagined it being a bit liek saying "You're such a great father...for letting my mother raise me":P

The Corinthian

wallycharlo wrote: »

I'm pretty sure that it would not be purchased unless the buyer was sure that the father in question possesses the appropriate sense of humour.

Or if the card was bought, on behalf of the child, by a mother who's not in a relationship with the father but likes to get a dig in whenever she can.

Delirium

When I was originally trying to rent the house I'm currently in, the landlady (who can't be more than 5 years older than me) asked who would clean the house when she found out it was a single guy that was going to be renting the house.:rolleyes:

Cyclepath

When my kids came to live with me rather than their mother (due to alcohol issues...) I faced quite a few instances of sexism. The two main issues were:

1. It was a nightmare getting child benefit as they required proof that the mother was not claiming it despite my having full custody. Surely I am entitled to claim it and my ex-wife is committing a crime if fraudulently claiming? Apparently not.

2. The family courts start from the position that the children belong with their mother, no matter what. There is a much greater burden of proof when you're a father. Father's are not taken seriously as single parents and are looked on with suspicion. I was just fortunate that the kids were old enough to give their own testimony.

Anyone that has been in a similar situation will tell you the same. I witnessed enough cases while waiting in line for my turn at the family courts...

Ilik Urgee

Cyclepath wrote: »

When my kids came to live with me rather than their mother (due to alcohol issues...) I faced quite a few instances of sexism. The two main issues were:

1. It was a nightmare getting child benefit as they required proof that the mother was not claiming it despite my having full custody. Surely I am entitled to claim it and my ex-wife is committing a crime if fraudulently claiming? Apparently not.

2. The family courts start from the position that the children belong with their mother, no matter what. There is a much greater burden of proof when you're a father. Father's are not taken seriously as single parents and are looked on with suspicion. I was just fortunate that the kids were old enough to give their own testimony.

Anyone that has been in a similar situation will tell you the same. I witnessed enough cases while waiting in line for my turn at the family courts...

Only reason my partner and I need to get married, solely for my having access to my own daughter should anything happen. If I were to pop off, no issues as regards the mother taking full custody of her...

How many times I've been blatantly ignored in the local creche by the same repetitive offenders when it comes to how she's doing and how she's progressing. Yesterday I collected C again and asked how her day had been only to be told fine fine. Reported back home when my OH got home and she could see how browned off I was and she agreed that the same lady would give her an indepth account of the day any time she met that lady.

Have to say there are some fantastic ladies there and have been very positive and encouraging towards me and my contributions.

What irks me the most? Those offenders are pushy 20-30 year olds who have the latest cars, tattoos, hairstyles. Modern in every way except for their attitude towards me.:mad::mad:

The Corinthian

Ilik Urgee wrote: »

Only reason my partner and I need to get married, solely for my having access to my own daughter should anything happen. If I were to pop off, no issues as regards the mother taking full custody of her...

You don't need to get married for that, you simply need to apply for guardianship - you get the form, both you and your partner fill and sign it and you go off to get it registered.

In reality, the sort of prejudices that you and Cyclepath have described will occur regardless of your marital status. Indeed, half the time crèche workers won't know if the parents are married and will often assume so - a common complaint of some single mothers, for example, is getting letters addressed to Mrs. [your_surname], simply because the child might have the father's surname.

So ultimately, it's not prejudice against the father because he's unmarried, but because he's a man.

Ilik Urgee

The Corinthian wrote: »

You don't need to get married for that, you simply need to apply for guardianship - you get the form, both you and your partner fill and sign it and you go off to get it registered.

In reality, the sort of prejudices that you and Cyclepath have described will occur regardless of your marital status. Indeed, half the time crèche workers won't know if the parents are married and will often assume so - a common complaint of some single mothers, for example, is getting letters addressed to Mrs. [your_surname], simply because the child might have the father's surname.

So ultimately, it's not prejudice against the father because he's unmarried, but because he's a man.

Yeah my post read a bit like that but I meant as a man:o

Jeez thanks a million for that link. I'm embarrassed to say I didn't know this and really relieved this option is there(which I will be taking). Brilliant news, you've just made my day!

Pawwed Rig

Ilik Urgee wrote: »

Have to say there are some fantastic ladies there and have been very positive and encouraging towards me and my contributions.

Tell me this. Are men allowed work in a creche? I watched that documentry on RTE a couple of weeks ago and noticed it was all girls. I would think an essential part of a childs development would require a more rounded interaction with adults?

On the opposite end I often had cause to visit a nursing home where a relative was a resident for a number of years and because of the prevalence of female staff, there was very little laid on for the male residents. I would often ask if he had seen x rugby match or y hurling match but the girls working there would not have put it on for him. Probably not out of badness but may not have even been aware of the event taking place. Instead the main focus of TV was soaps.*

* Kind of off the point but just popped into my head

wallycharlo

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

Tell me this. Are men allowed work in a creche?

Guess it's just one of those places where you encounter a natural imbalance, just as one could ask 'Are women allowed to be engineers' ...