Not accepting a homosexual as a roommate. Discrimination/Homophobic?

tunedout

I got in trouble on another forum about this but I think the opinion may have been a bit biased there. Basically, there was a story of a lad who got turned down from moving into an apartment because he text them and told them he was a homosexual.

Now everyone on the website was saying it was discrimination and homophobic etc.

I gave my opinion that I wouldn't be comfortable living with a homosexual , and not allowing a homosexual live with you was no more discrimination than a group of girls looking for a girl only to move in. Or a bunch of young people, looking for a young person to move in.

A bunch of straight people looking for a straight person to move in, I see no difference.

So maybe there would be a less biased opinion here, do you think it is discrimination and homophobic to not leave someone who is homosexual move in with you?

RacoonQueen

It's not discrimination. If you wouldn't be comfortable living with them why should you let them move in?

I think you should be entitled to choose anyone you like to move in. It's your home, after all. I don't think 'discrimination' really applies when it comes to housemates. I'm sure many/most will disagree.

Pushtrak

I wouldn't give a crap one way or the other, but I presume if a person cared so much about the person they are living with not being homosexual, then the feelings would be mutual. As in, the homosexual would no more want to live with them than vice versa.

humbert

I could understand not wanting to live with a camp person but just on the basis of which gender they are attracted to seems a bit off.

Stheno

Yep it's discrimination

And what's with the leave instead of allow/accept?

My name is URL

It might not be homophobic but it's clearly discrimination. Even if there's no bad intent.

Where To

tunedout wrote: »

do you think it is discrimination and homophobic to not leave someone who is homosexual move in with you?

YES

tunedout

Stheno wrote: »

Yep it's discrimination

And what's with the leave instead of allow/accept?

Fixed. Thanks.

stimpson

tunedout wrote: »

So maybe there would be a less biased opinion here, do you think it is discrimination and homophobic to not leave someone who is homosexual move in with you?

Surely that's the definition of homophobia.

Do you think it's not racist if you don't want to share with coloured people?

kiffer

Gets popcorn...

Also... yes, the housemates are free to decide who they want to let move in...
Yes, if they liked him untill he said he was gay they are being homophobic...

No gays! = homophobic.
No blacks/Asians/whites/cherokee/whatever = racist.
No men/women = sexist (some obvious exceptions... like twin rooms)

Simple and straightforward.

Why would you be uncomfortable with a gay person in the house?

tunedout

stimpson wrote: »

Do you think it's not racist if you don't want to share with coloured people?

Are a bunch of lads who are looking for a 3rd/4th lad to move in with them sexist?

brummytom

When I moved to uni, I was put in a room with two Egyptian, very very devout, Muslims. They didn't drink, didn't smoke, didn't eat bacon (which was the last straw).

I moved rooms, not because they were Muslim/Egyptian per se, but because we had absolutely nothing in common and I didn't want to spend a year sharing with people I'd struggle to say more than a few words to.

Basically, no, I don't think it's a problem. People constantly look to find offence in something. If you don't feel comfortable living with someone, why should you?

Jimoslimos

Choosing a room/house mate is a discriminatory process anyway. I've seen it applied the other way in Sydney - ads looking for gay/lesbian housemates. People want to live with others they feel comfortable with, doesn't bother me either way so long as its not in a professional capacity (workplace, customers, etc)

Micky Dolenz

Sounds like you have some repressed issue you need to address OP.

Want to chat over drinks?

awec

Of course it's not homophobic or discriminatory. You are free to decide who you want to live with ffs.

The King of Moo

It is discrimination in a literal sense, in that you're choosing not to accept them based on a particular criterion.

But it's not legal discrimination, in that you're entitled to choose whomever you want to be a housemate.

I personally don't see why anyone would be uncomfortable living with someone of a different sexuality though.

Seachmall

I like the comparison with girls not wanting a guy to move in.

That's generally accepted as being a "safe" decision but it's still discrimination (and a bit of an absurd generalisation).

At the end of the day they are allowed to choose to live with someone they feel comfortable around.

ballsymchugh

there was an ad in daft a few years ago when i was looking for a place in dublin where some fella was renting a room in rathgar. at the end of the ad, he asked for gay people only. the room was still advertised for about 6 months, so his discrimination towards straight people may have cost him a whack of money.
discrimination goes both ways.

IM0

stimpson wrote: »

Surely that's the definition of homophobia.

Do you think it's not racist if you don't want to share with coloured people?

its racist to call non causasian [aka 'white'] people coloured. full stop

the world you are looking for is black

Penn

I think it is discrimination and homophobic. You're not letting that person move in based solely on their sexual preference rather than their own merits (going by your OP anyway).

But at the same time, if you feel like you're not going to get along with them based on anything (in this case, their sexuality), then it's best for all parties concerned that you don't let them move in.

krudler

I don't really see why someone's sexual preferences would make them any harder to live with but unless they're throwing gay orgies and walking around in assless leather chapps, which I hear is what gheys are prone to do,then I guess its ok.

IM0

Seachmall wrote: »

I like the comparison with girls not wanting a guy to move in.

That's generally accepted as being a "safe" decision but it's still discrimination (and a bit of an absurd generalisation).

At the end of the day they are allowed to choose to live with someone they feel comfortable around.

safe in the sense of?

awec

ballsymchugh wrote: »

there was an ad in daft a few years ago when i was looking for a place in dublin where some fella was renting a room in rathgar. at the end of the ad, he asked for gay people only. the room was still advertised for about 6 months, so his discrimination towards straight people may have cost him a whack of money.
discrimination goes both ways.

I've seen a few of those ads.

Presumably the people in question just feel more comfortable living with gay people.

Fair enough. I'm not offended by that, they are free to choose who they want to live with.

Seachmall

IM0 wrote: »

safe in the sense of?

Rape.

tunedout

krudler wrote: »

I don't really see why someone's sexual preferences would make them any harder to live with

Can you see why someone's sex, age, race, religion would make them any harder to live with?

IM0

krudler wrote: »

I don't really see why someone's sexual preferences would make them any harder to live with but unless they're throwing gay orgies and walking around in assless leather chapps, which I hear is what gheys are prone to do,then I guess its ok.

maybe you dont want to hear two guys going at it, on the other side of your accommodations thin plasterboard [usually] wall

orestes

You're not looking for a less biased opinion, you're looking for people to back up your bullsh1t.

tunedout

awec wrote: »

I've seen a few of those ads.

Presumably the people in question just feel more comfortable living with gay people.

Fair enough. I'm not offended by that, they are free to choose who they want to live with.

So isn't it fine to say that some straight people might be more comfortable living with straight people aswell?
Have you any issue with that?

IM0

Seachmall wrote: »

Rape.

your having a laugh! but that is what I thought you were eluding to though :rolleyes:

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

My name is URL wrote: »

It might not be homophobic but it's clearly discrimination. Even if there's no bad intent.

I'd go the othe way around.

awec

tunedout wrote: »

So isn't it fine to say that some straight people might be more comfortable living with straight people aswell?
Have you any issue with that?

Of course it's fine. As I said, you are free to decide who you want to live with. If you'd rather live with straight people that's 100% fine. You are not a homophobe.

If you'd rather live with gay people that's 100% fine. You are not a "heterophobe" or whatever the fecking word is.

If you are a girl and you want to live with girls you are not sexist.

efb

It's not right but its understandable. I've lived with guys gays straights and gays and different ethnicities and I've never found any singular grouping more or less desirable. Some annoyed me others didn't but it was never gender/so/ethnicity specific

Boombastic

Some houses advertise as female / male only. I don't think it's discrimination, no one should be forced to live with some one, there's plenty of other houses to rent

ballsymchugh

orestes wrote: »

You're not looking for a less biased opinion, you're looking for people to back up your bullsh1t.

person wants to choose who they live with shocker!

i didn't take one option on a place in dublin because the person who showed it to me had a really screechy voice. who did i discriminate against there?

krudler

IM0 wrote: »

maybe you dont want to hear two guys going at it, on the other side of your accommodations thin plasterboard [usually] wall

guys no, girls...yes.

Overheal

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a woman: sexual discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a man: sexual discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a Homosexual: sexual discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a Catholic: religious discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a Protestant: religious discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a Muslim: religious discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a Jew: religious discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a Black person: racial discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a White person: racial discrimination

Wouldn't be comfortable hiring/living with a Homicidal Maniac: common sense

IM0

the people you are going to live with are not your employers, so can decide who they want to live with. the only reason discrimination exists is because it a law punishable by whatever the punishment is according to whats been broken. basically you have no leg to stand on get over it

fortuneteller

A friend of mine had a gay friend of his renting a room in his house in london..
only problem was he'd didnt know he was gay until he was met on the landing one morning by a big black male.......that had just emerged from this guys room...He asked him to leave that evening, And i'd have done the same...

Overheal

tunedout wrote: »

Can you see why someone's sex, age, race, religion would make them any harder to live with?

If we assume that they can't coexist. Right off the bat though you're assuming things about the person, like "Oh he's an Atheist, so like, he wouldn't have any fear of trying to steal from me or rape me etc." Or perhaps you assume the muslim applying is a tyrannical jihadist. Or that the girl you bring in is going to clog up the shower drain and smear dirty tampons on the window.

Gbear

It's clearly discrimination. It's practically a textbook definition of it.

Any decision not to let anyone be your roomate is discrimination. Whether it's because they're a girl, black, smelly, on the sex offenders register or cross-eyed you're discriminating. Whether your discrimination is reasonable is a different discussion.

It's a pretty clear case of homophobia and I mean that in the literal sense - a phobia of gay people. It sounds like you have a level of discomfort with gay people due to an ignorance of what they're like. Doesn't mean you'e the devil or anything, but it is silly.
I have a similar phobia but I know it's silly and it wouldn't cause me to discriminate against someone for being gay (or at least I hope it wouldn't).


Incidentally, I think that a good way to cure that phobia would be to actually get a gay roomate. Take away some of the mystique and misconceptions about it - they'd be "your roomate Steve" as opposed to "some gay fella".

P_1

Some people need to cop on, in every choice you make you're discriminating something/someone.

Prefer to drink Lyon's tea = discriminating Barry's tea
Prefer to eat pork = discriminating all other meats
Prefer to live with a football fan = discriminating non football fans

and so on...

BillyMitchel

OP would you mind if it was a lesbian?

Rothmans

fortuneteller wrote: »

A friend of mine had a gay friend of his renting a room in his house in london..
only problem was he'd didnt know he was gay until he was met on the landing one morning by a big black male.......that had just emerged from this guys room...He asked him to leave that evening, And i'd have done the same...

Hold on, are you saying its ok to be racist or homophobic, or both :P

Bannasidhe

fortuneteller wrote: »

A friend of mine had a gay friend of his renting a room in his house in london..
only problem was he'd didnt know he was gay until he was met on the landing one morning by a big black male.......that had just emerged from this guys room...He asked him to leave that evening, And i'd have done the same...

Why?

Micky Dolenz

fortuneteller wrote: »

A friend of mine had a gay friend of his renting a room in his house in london..
only problem was he'd didnt know he was gay until he was met on the landing one morning by a big black male.......that had just emerged from this guys room...He asked him to leave that evening, And i'd have done the same...

Your friend is clearly racist and homophobic.

Overheal

fortuneteller wrote: »

A friend of mine had a gay friend of his renting a room in his house in london..
only problem was he'd didnt know he was gay until he was met on the landing one morning by a big black male.......that had just emerged from this guys room...He asked him to leave that evening, And i'd have done the same...

So racism and homophobia to boot. Classy.

I remember hanging out at a friends place once where her gay room mate was having a guy over with barry white playing in the background. We just thought it was funny, not offensive. Live and let live.

efb

fortuneteller wrote: »

A friend of mine had a gay friend of his renting a room in his house in london..
only problem was he'd didnt know he was gay until he was met on the landing one morning by a big black male.......that had just emerged from this guys room...He asked him to leave that evening, And i'd have done the same...

Wow.

tunedout

BillyMitchel wrote: »

OP would you mind if it was a lesbian?

I'm not sure. Definitely not, if we were looking for another lad to have the craic with in the evenings/go on the p*ss with etc.

Seachmall

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Your friend is clearly racist and homophobic.

Overheal wrote: »

So racism and homophobia to boot. Classy.

I remember hanging out at a friends place once where her gay room mate was having a guy over with barry white playing in the background. We just thought it was funny, not offensive. Live and let live.

efb wrote: »

Wow.

You didn't let him finish.

Turns out the large black man was his friend's boyfriend.

P_1

fortuneteller wrote: »

A friend of mine had a gay friend of his renting a room in his house in london..
only problem was he'd didnt know he was gay until he was met on the landing one morning by a big black male.......that had just emerged from this guys room...He asked him to leave that evening, And i'd have done the same...

To be honest I'd have done the same?

Why? Because the flatmate had a stranger over without first asking me if I was ok with that. If a busty blonde emerged from the lads room I would have done the exact same.