Taking daughter's friend on holiday - Contribution from the other family?

dzer2

If you can afford it dont do it, can you not see the state of the country after years of doing things that we cant afford.

banbhaaifric

dzer2 - you are not comparing like with like. Taking your children out of school for holidays abroad and thereby avoiding the peak times will always mean you pay less. Your children are in primary school so I don't think there is so much of a problem with that, but these girls are in secondary school.
Also, I don't think you realise that as they will be 14/15, they are charged at the adult rate.
And finally, we are not spending anything we don't have. We have no debts and won't be getting into any by taking this holiday. Another reason we want to fix the costs as much as possible before we leave.

joetoad

Making a mountain out of a moe-hill here

All you do is ask the parents your daughter was wondering if she could bring a friend on holiday and if they were willing to help cover say 50% of the cost for their daughter. If the parents say that can't afford it but wouldn't mind the daughter going then tell them you'll get back to them in a couple of days and see if you will be able to afford it.

banbhaaifric

Hi All and thank you all for your comments.

I thought I'd update so you can all see how it went, and it might be of some use to people in the future.

In the end we decided to email the other parent because we felt there would be less pressure for her to respond without having time to think about it, and also that we could express what we wanted to say exactly how we wanted to say it.

Our email basically said that we would love to take her daughter with us but that unfortunately we weren't in a position to cover the full cost and how would she feel about maybe contributing something towards the flight. She responded saying that she was delighted we asked her daughter and wouldn't dream of us paying. I was dropping her daughter home soon after that so I called in to say that the holiday would be around 650 and we wouldn't dream of accepting the full amount. That it was our choice to go on an expensive holiday and the max we could accept would be 200.

A couple of days later the other parent emailed to say that having thought about it she couldn't really justify the cost of sending her daughter on holidays. We to'd and fro'd about how to reply but in the end decided to email back asking her to please not worry about the money end of things, that we had asked her daughter to come away with us and that the offer still stood. We said that if she were willing to allow her daughter come with us, that we would be more than happy to cover the full cost. We explained that we would in fact be grateful if she came because it meant all 3 of us would enjoy our holiday more. After a couple of days she replied to say that she would contribute 300 towards the holiday, but didn't want us to feel under pressure to bring her daughter. We replied to say there was no way we would accept more than 200 and that if she was happy for her daughter to come with us we could argue about that closer to the time.

Now all we have to do is find the holiday for 650 all in... I know a few people posted that we could get one much cheaper, but I'm at a loss to see where they were looking....

Mods, I guess you can close this thread now. Thanks again to everyone for their advice and comments.

Daisy M

Hey glad you got sorted, I would hazard a guess and say the mam initially refused when she heard how much the holiday was costing you.
Did you not have somewhere already in mind that you planned to book?

CaraMay

So its €650 for 4 of you to go but the child is paying €200?

banbhaaifric

CaraMay wrote: »

So its €650 for 4 of you to go but the child is paying €200?

Are you kidding?

Sure, we thought how can we get someone to pay for the bulk of our holiday? Let's invite our daughter's friend and get her to pay most of it. :rolleyes:

If you had read any of the thread you would see that the cost is 650 each. It is often a good idea to read some of the thread before you post.;)

Little My

Banbhaaifric, I'm really glad you have sorted it out in a way that works for all of you, and I hope you all have a lovely time.

I would suggest that your daughter never finds out how much you paid to take her friend on holiday and how much her parents contributed. Teenage girls can be best of friends one day and, well, not the next. It would be awful if it was ever thrown back at the other girl in a row how much was paid and by whom.

January

CaraMay wrote: »

So its €650 for 4 of you to go but the child is paying €200?

My understanding is they are looking for something for €650 per person for all inclusive.

fuzzy1

My daughter recently went on an all inclusive holiday with another family. I paid for the flights and accommodation and as it was all inclusive all food drinks etc were paid for by me.They went on a few trips on the holiday and my daughter paid for herself.
I gave the Mam €60 to cover costs of taxis etc. At the time I thought this was enough but she seemed really annoyed or got the impression that I should have given more.
In a way I wish I had never sent my daughter on this holiday. Having covered all accommodation, flight costs and food etc I would have thought that the other family would cover the rest and be happy with that afterall they were getting the holiday out of it and company for their daughter.
What would others think. If you are sending your child on holiday with another family what would you expect to pay?

Daisy M

If I was bringing another child I would be delighted if the cost of their airfare was covered but if I asked them to come I would not expect even this.
If my child was asked I would like to be able to cover all their costs but seeing as I would have had no say in how much the holiday and other related things cost I would have a cap on how much I would be able to pay.

I would not ask another child to come on holidays with us if I could not fully afford to cover the costs and there is no way I would allow them to pay the cost of day trips let alone contribute towards taxis.

Did you not agree in advance how much you should give?

Xidu

I wouldn't take any other family' child for holidays, I think it's too much responsibility. What if anything happens.....even they r 16.

Pending

I've often taken several of my daughter's friends away on holiday over the years and never once would it have occurred to me to cover the other child's travel expenses/hotel. Nor did I ever have to ask for payment either, it was always, "thanks for the invite, what is the cost?"

We did invite one girl this year and unfortunately the kid had to cancel. That left me €600 out of pocket, since having an extra person meant we had to pay for my youngest as an adult due to room occupancy. Now there was no way I could have asked for that of course, but I was miffed!