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Unexpected grief

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  • 04-04-2013 6:21pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    A family member recently died and I'm feeling very strange over it. The death was expected so I felt somewhat prepared for it and relieved they weren't suffering. The days of the funeral etc were incredibly busy and tiring so maybe that's why I feel the way I do.

    I'll be honest - we weren't close, they were a very difficult person to be around and was quite cruel to myself and to others. I have a lot of bad memories of them in fact. I wouldn't have wished any harm or unkindness to them or anything like that, nor did I revel in their illness or death, but I genuinely didnt think I'd feel as deflated as I do.

    I hope it's just the tiredness catching up with me but I actually MISS them now it's all over. It feels like the end of an era or something. I know in my heart that there's no right or wrong way to grieve, but I'm just surprised I feel anything at all. Maybe I'm upset for the people who were affected by the death, or maybe it's reminding me of my own mortality and that of my loved ones but I just cannot believe I'm feeling so odd right now. I really want to be able to support the people who were close to this person too, so this is an added pressure. I can't concentrate on work or anything, and felt so melancholy when I woke today.

    I'll be meeting a couple of supportive friends over the weekend and doing some positive things for myself so hopefully that will help me make sense of this and start to move on.


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