An unfortunate case of mistaken identity

leahyl

This is a case of mistaken identity except in the case of the wrong car - my mum and my next door neighbour go grocery shopping together every Thursday and either my dad or her husband will collect them after.

Anyway, this one Thursday her husband was collecting them and my mum was finished her shopping earlier than the neighbour so she went outside with her trolley and saw the neighbours husband and he gestured to the car somewhere in a certain direction so my mum headed down towards the car and started packing all her stuff in the back seat and then sat in and put on her seat belt...she was looking around the car and thinking - the car looks very different; I don't recognise that umbrella etc. Then she looked out the window and saw my neighbour and her husband looking around with a confused look on their faces and then it hit her.....she was in the wrong car. Cue her scrambling to get out of the back seat of a strangers car with all her messages, my neighbour was nearly crying with laughter

JoeA3

Years ago, I was on a company-paid weekend trip in Scotland and part of the deal was we all got a few hours in a luxury pool / spa - jacuzzis, saunas, the works.

Anyway, one of the lads was getting changed and he sees his "mate" buck naked with his back to him towelling off. So he gets his towel and whips him across the bare arse with it with a big Yeeeeeeee-haww!

You guessed it, it wasn't his mate - instead it was a big Scotsman who eventually saw the funny side, saying "It's a bad day when another bloke recognises you by your bare arse!" or words to that effect!

elaney

Years ago, Myself and hubby to be were out with my sisters. One of my sisters got pretty drunk so we decided to stop off at the chippy to sober her up a bit. At the time he was driving a Renault megane van. My sisters used to sit in the back. As I was watching her drunkingly walking down the street I got momentarily distracted, when I looked up a minute or so later I saw her opening up the back of a van exactly the same as ours and get in. By the time I got up to her she was sitting in the back with three fella looking at her I still don't think to this day she had copped on she was in the wrong van.:D

Laika1986

I Used to work in Mcdonalds a few years back. A managers brother started one day and didnt have a word of english(he had just arrived from Poland). So I head out to the freezer to grab something and see who I think is my friend so i proceed to slap him hard in the back of the head. He turns around , doesnt matter what I say he doesn't understand. His sister hated me from then on

JoeA3

I've another one. A friend of mine was due to be collected from his rented accommodation by his father one friday evening, but he himself was delayed getting back to the house, so he just said to the oul fella to let himself in, the door will be open (people coming and going all the time).
Anyway, the oul lad arrives at the house and he's bursting to drop a captain's log so he goes straight upstairs and uses the facilities. He notes how neat and tidy the bathroom is for a house full of lads, fluffy towels, etc. Job done, he saunters downstairs only to be met by a 10 year old kid who's wondering who the hell this old dude is coming down his stairs...

Wrong house!

Korvanica

Was in dublin airport with my family to welcome my uncle home when I was about 10. I saw my dad from across the room with his back to me and went over. Gave him the hardest kick up the hole I could manage. He winced and turned around, wasn't dad... I ran like ****.

Ash.J.Williams

Clandestine wrote: »

Friend or not, why would you do that? Thats not much of a joke...

a here..lads who know each other generally beat the ****e out of eachother, it's how we express our inner gay whilst remaining tough ..


and yes i've often grabbed "mates" in a headlock at dark gigs only to find it's not them....

Ash.J.Williams

elaney wrote: »

Years ago, Myself and hubby to be were out with my sisters. One of my sisters got pretty drunk so we decided to stop off at the chippy to sober her up a bit. At the time he was driving a Renault megane van. My sisters used to sit in the back. As I was watching her drunkingly walking down the street I got momentarily distracted, when I looked up a minute or so later I saw her opening up the back of a van exactly the same as ours and get in. By the time I got up to her she was sitting in the back with three fella looking at her I still don't think to this day she had copped on she was in the wrong van.:D

imagine he was a kidnapper!!! "man this is getting to easy" he'd probably say to himself before driving your sister to Wicklow.

--Kaiser--

I went up to a girl before and said 'Hi, my name is Kaiser.'. The girl rolled her eyes up and replied 'I think you're mistaking me for someone who gives a sh1t'*



*May not have happened

bradyle

It was around Christmas and i was in a music shop with my brother and it was packed. I seen him kneeling down looking at some CD so decided to give him a big kick...except obviously it wasnt my brother.

Worst thing was though it wasn't a complete stranger it was a friend of a friend and seeing as we both lived in a very small town I'd see him all the time...I was always referred to as the girl that kicked me

elaney

Ash.J.Williams wrote: »

imagine he was a kidnapper!!! "man this is getting to easy" he'd probably say to himself before driving your sister to Wicklow.

I think they were more shocked than anything else she just sat there eating her chips.

byronbay2

Many, many years ago I was a student in UCC. One day, while walking to a lecture, I bumped into a girl I had met a few times in company and knew vaguely. We made small talk for a short while and then she said "Oh btw, when can you give me my tape back" (yes, it was a long time ago!). I said that she hadn't lent me any tape and she immediately flew off the handle and started telling me that I better return her effing tape or the s*it would hit the fan etc.

I stayed calm and tried to explain that it was a case of mistaken identity but she was having none of it and continued screaming and roaring at me in a completely hysterical way (to the huge amusement of all the passers-by) for a couple of minutes until I eventually told her to f*ck off (very unusual for me, I hate rudeness even towards complete ar*eholes) and walked off.

A mutual friend approached me later that day to say how mortified your one was for the mistake she had made and could I ever forgive her etc. I said that I couldn't care less about the mistaken identity but if I never saw that nutjob again it would be too soon. On the positive side, she avoided me in company after that and we never spoke again!

Siuin

I was waiting for my dad to collect me from the train station when I saw him pulled up outside the main entrance. I swung open the door of the car and plonked myself beside him only to find myself face to face with a horrified looking elderly man :S

BUBBLE WRAP

I remember a few years ago, my dad, my brothers and myself went go karting. We were but into an other group for the go karting. Anyway, I was on my second lap and going around a bend I clipped my dads go kart, which sent him into a spin and he went off the track. After I mention to my father how I sent him off the track but, it was really a different chap I sent off the track, with the exact same dark dark blue shirt.

Rented Mule

lost in cork wrote: »

I once walked into a record shop many moons ago and saw my friend squatting down looking at the bottom shelf of 7" singles ,i walked over to him and for a joke decided to push him over with my foot ,he rolled over onto his side then onto his back and looked up at me in disbelief ,only it wasnt my friend at all.Any one else had similar experiences?

My uncle passed away in the States back in '96. We went out after the wake for a good session. Overslept the next morning and realised that I would not be able to make it to the funeral mass. I decided to go to the cometary and wait for the procession to pass through and jump in the queue.

It was mid August and the sun was roasting down on me. The fact that I was hungover only made things worse. I saw the funeral procession coming and everything was going to plan. I parked the car and walked up to the grave site. As the priest was saying the prayers I was overcome with emotions with tears streaming down my face. I took off my sunglasses to wipe my eyes and the old woman next to meet patted me on the back and gave me a little hug. It was at this point that I realised ....yes ..you guessed it. I was at the wrong grave.

My emotions at this point were going in two directions. The first was absolute horror. The second was absolute hysterical laughing that only made me tear up more. This also made me look like I was crying uncontrollably. I didn't have the nerve to walk away from the grave fearing the old woman hugging me would have followed.

The service ended and I made a quick walk back to the car. I drove back toward the entrance to the cemetery and waited for the rest of my family to arrive. My plan didn't finally work out as I did make it to my uncle's service.

At the reception, I pulled my aunt off to the side and told about my ordeal. She looked up at me and to laugh like I hadn't seen her laugh in a very long time. "Only you' is all she could get out.

I'm glad that I made her day.

3DataModem

Treasure hunt. About 20 years ago.

One of the items was a deposit slip from AIB... we pulled up outside one on OConnell St and one of our lads (tall and wide) ran in, grabbed it, ran out, ran back to the car.

For some reason the passenger door wouldn't open, he was rushed and yanked furiously at it... seemed to be locked.

The family cowering in the back seat were not amused, but us - one car back - were falling around laughing.

Seedy Arling

I worked with two girls who were in an adjoining office to mine years ago. We were always pulling pranks on each other. One day, i could hear one of them walking into my office so i snuck up behind the door and when they were going by i jumped out, did a big growl and was waving my arms like a lunatic.

Only problem was, that it was my boss who had just been into them. She was a tiny, prim and proper woman, and i scared the living sh1te out of her. I just froze with my arms in the air and a big stupid look on my face.

Worst thing about it was that i heard the two women inside in the office practically puking with laughter at how bad i how caught myself out.

skimpydoo

A couple of years ago during the time of the presidential election I was walking near Grafton Street when I spotted a fella who I thought was David Norris. I shouted out "Howya David good luck in the election". After I said this the fella turned around to look at me and I noticed it was not David Norris but this did not stop nearby passersby talking to him as if he was.

Pumpkinseeds

I'm often mistaken for someone who gives a crap:rolleyes:

Eathrin

Pumpkinseeds wrote: »

I'm often mistaken for someone who gives a crap:rolleyes:

Watch Out!!

CdeC

Walking through town on a summers day and I meet this guy on the street. Now you know when you meet someone you know but you're not sure where. Well this was one of those cases.
Well we spent 15 minutes going through all aspects of our lives from college to work to friends and family and we could not figure out at all where we knew eachother from. The initial enthusiasm soon began to become more and more awkward until one of us decided it was the end of the investiagtion and we should go our seperate ways.

Probably some goon I met in a chipper on a night out.

Hellrazer

Ended up at the wrong funeral removal once.

My grandfather died about a few years back and I was told that the funeral removal was on at say 6.00pm and was told to sit at the front with the family as you do.

Got stuck in traffic and arrived at the church about 5.50.Parked the car a fair bit away,ran the distance into the church and sat down right at the front with the family.Looked around and realised that I didnt know anyone that was at the funeral.

Id arrived at the end of 5.30 removal and not the start of the 6.00pm one.

Worst part was I just stood there shaking peoples hands that I didnt even know and people consoling me that obviously didn't know me either.

And then had to do the same half an hour later at the right funeral.

Im still slagged over that one to this day.

NinjaTruncs

My Dad has a friend who is notorious for ringing up the house putting on different voices and asking for my Dad, both my Dad and his friend are into horse racing. One day someone rings the house saying he's Tommy Kinane (a famous race horse trainer) and asks for my Dad to which I reply "**** off you old bollix" and hung up the phone, smugly thinking the friend hadn't caught me out.

All was well until my Dad came home later that day roaring at me asking what did I say to Tommy Kinane on the phone.

2Mad2BeMad

my mate owned a ford fiasta 06 blue
he parked it outside a garden just before the shops, we both got out, got what we wanted, came back out, went back to the car, and for some reason the keys werent unlocking it
so we stood their puzzled for about 10 minutes trying to force the doors open at one stage
when some owlfella comes running out of his gaf shouting wdf are you doing.
his car was parked about 10 feet away from this one
same colour, same year, hell close to the same reg haha
thank god the fella was alright with it though because we were hanging outta them doors haha

_sparkie_

I was being collected from the airport a while ago. I was wrecked after the flight and it was a ****ty day. I saw the car coming and it pulled up, I opened the back door threw my bag in and jumped in. A few seconds later I relaized the interior of the car was different and the driver was just staying at me. The guy went mental and started screaming at me, it was a bit of an overreaction but I guess it didnt help that I was just laughing in his face.

genuine leather

one hot summers day(the few rare ones we get) i was working away in the garden.walked out around the back of the house,heard the shower going in the en-suite, mmm might jump in with the missus and cool down ,wee kids at school............walked in..........TOTALLY forgot the missus was gone shopping,the sis in law in the shower all sudsd up( homeplace across the road... broken shower) opened door.....pause...excitement... pause...realisation was the sis in law....pause,pause, pause joking.... oops said sorry i said can you pass the soap.... ... apologised, closed the door and went and got a COLD beer to cool me down... ahh a good laugh about it after, and yeah, she is gorgeous...but so is my queen bee

washiskin

My sister played a practical joke on a mate of hers years ago and he swore revenge. He was walking back from the pub one night about a month or so later when he spotted my Dad's car (which my sister regularly borrowed) parked off road with the window's fogged up. Convinced it was her and her fella he sneaked up and wrenched open the driver's door yelling "I got ya, ya Wagon!" only to discover not only was it not my Dad's car but the older lady and her younger beau inside did not appreciate their clandestine goings on being interrupted. :rolleyes:

smash

When my friend was eating a 99, I hit her elbow from behind and covered her face in ice cream. The yelp of 'what the fcuk!!!!' made me realise it wasn't her so I just ran.

anncoates

What makes the OP so funny is not so much the joke itself, it's the image of this poor guy lying on his back looking up at him in bewilderment.

scdublin

Myself and the family went to get a takeaway one night and I went in to pick up the food while they waited in the car. When the food was ready I walked back out to the car and went to sit in the passenger seat, only to realise that the woman in the driver's seat was not my mam. Wrong car.

RUSTEDCORE

I said how are ya gay to a man I thought was gay burn a pub once and got Its not a choice I was born this way back.... it was,nt mr burn but at least I didnt look stupid just a homophobe.

Sir Gallagher

RUSTEDCORE wrote: »

I said how are ya gay to a man I thought was gay burn a pub once and got Its not a choice I was born this way back.... it was,nt mr burn but at least I didnt look stupid just a homophobe.

Bit early in the day to be on the sherry isn't it?

I hopped out of my then-boyfriends car at the traffic lights to pop into the shop for something and he was to park in a small area a few metres ahead. I came out of the shop with the milk or whatever and hopped into his car making some remark about the smell of the guy serving, put my seatbelt on and then I looked at him enquiringly as we hadn't started moving.

Complete stranger smiled back at me.

I didn't say a word, just stepped out of the car feeling like a dope. Himself saw everything so I couldn't even pretend it hadn't happened

rain on

Came across a fella I know freaking out at the side of the street that his car had been clamped once. After some thrilling minutes he realised it wasn't his car.

My da had someone come up to him in a restaurant before and go "You don't know me but I know you.. you're JP McManus" (he's not JP McManus) - my da had actually met this fella before but he appeared to have wiped any memory of my da from his brain completely and replaced it with JP McManus

VinLieger

St patricks Day ages ago, i was around 7-8 i think and my mum had taken me in to see the parade on stephens green. We were about 3-4 deep in the crowd so i couldnt really see and she wasnt able to put me on her shoulders. Anyway she let me run up to the front of the crowd and have a watch where she could see me.
Eventually i got hungry and came back to her to get some sweets that i knew were in her jacket pocket but when I reached in I couldnt find them. I looked up to see it wasnt my mum at all but a very old man who luckily hadnt noticed me trying to pickpocket him. Ran back to the front and retraced my steps again to thankfully find her and i held on tight to her leg for the rest of the day

Stinicker

I said excuse me to a mannequin in Dunnes Stores once as I had sort of bumped into it. My sister was with me and nearly died laughing!

El Inho

Just yesterday I was in a shop and saw the kiss me im irish m&m stands.

Now I know it wasn't funny, but i was tired and thought my friend (who was female) would find it hilarious if i turned and said, 'suck me c0ck im irish would have been better'

so this happened and that girl in the leather jacket same leather jacket as my friend was not my friend - she had ventured further down the shop looking at crisps.

lucky the girl was too scared to react and i left swiftly

CiaranK

One of them I read reminded me of this. It didn't happen to me, but I was there when it happened to someone I know. He was upstairs in a building by the window because his van was half blocking someone elses in the carpark. He was just there for a few minutes and then goin out again. Someone walked into the carpark and was looking all around. He thought it was Gabriel, who's van it was he blocked in. He opened the window and shouted out 'Are you looking for me'. The guy looks up and it turns out it's not gabriel. He shouts down 'Oh Sorry, I thought you were Gay' and closed the window again leaving the guy looking bewildered and offended.

Sir Gallagher

I was heading to a concert in the o2 with my girlfriend, i was a couple of paces behind her. This bloke approached her as we reached the gates introducing himself and saying "you must be Emma". I had caught up then and asked what was going on, she just replied "eh no" and hurried us along. Obviously he was waiting on a blind date, or else that's his way of picking up women.

RUSTEDCORE

Sir Gallagher wrote: »

Bit early in the day to be on the sherry isn't it?

purely medicinal

I have another one but... im not one to gossip

Eathrin

Stinicker wrote: »

I said excuse me to a mannequin in Dunnes Stores once as I had sort of bumped into it. My sister was with me and nearly died laughing!

Reminds me that I once said thanks to an automatic sliding door for opening.

eurokev

was parked up outside work one day, and was calling someone before I drove off. Guy opens the door asks how I am and sits down in the passenger seat. His face when he realised he didnt know me was hilarious

Capt'n Midnight

I had the weirdest experience. I was walking in the park and I said to myself "Hang on, that's Jimmy Petersen. I haven't seen him since I was nine". And I walked up to him and I slapped him on the back and I said "How's it goin' ya ol' moron!?" and I knock him down. And then he starts crying "Aaah! Mommy, mommy!"


And that's when I realised "wait a second, if that's Jimmy Petersen, . . . he'd have grown up too!"

I mean, sure, now it's obvious...

Mac-Chops

Was on a busy tube in London a couple of weeks ago and had my hand on one of the centre rails.

Girlfriend standing beside me put her hand a little lower than mine and for a good majority of the journey before she realised it was on a hand that belonged to another guy beside us who had his earphones in and a mixed look of embarrassment/laughter/annoyance on his mug!

Needless to say she was only morto when she realised.

Funny for a place where strangers rarely if ever look at nor say a word to each other!

Chemical Burn

I once tapped my wife's arse when I was donning a bathing suit ... turns out it was a different girl :O


oh wait, that was Hal from Malcolm in the Middle

amber69

About 20 years ago I was only going out with my wife and we'd just had a blazing row but we had to drop back a video to the store, we weren't speaking so I wouldn't go in with her. I'd double parked across the road when two people opened the passenger door and climbed into the back of my 2 door fiesta. I thought they were friends of my oh so I said nothing. As I looked over at the store I realised there's a taxi office next door, at this stage they'd been sitting there more than a minute I just turned around and said in my blunt way im not a f###ing taxi. You'd want to see the speed of them back into the office.

Apanachi

Years ago, my husband unlocked his car door, got in, was about to put the key into the ignition and noticed his car stereo missing, he totally freaked out and took a quick look behind him to see if his rucksack was still there and noticed a strange blanked on the seat where his bag should have been, at first he was totally confused, then even madder, because he thought the thieves had not only stolen his stereo, but were also mocking him, it wasn't until he tried to unsuccessfully start the engine he realised it wasn't his car, the key fitted the door but not the ignition.

Something simiar happened a guy I knew in New York, he came home one night, totally wasted, to his rented appartent, he was living in an area where all the appartment look the same and were similarily furnished, he unlocked the front door, proceeded to his appartment, unlocked the door and flaked out on the sofa, he then noticed the TV was different, turned out he was in the wrong apparment block, apparently all the appartments had universal locks, he wasn't long getting on the phone to his landlord to get him to change his locks, lucikly the people who's appartement he was in were in bed and didn't hear him enter

Teebor15

Nipped into Woodies one day to get something i cant remember, but it was in a big bulky box that would'nt fit in the boot. Walked across car park, opened back door and without bending down to look in started horsing this big box across the back seat, grunting and groaning while beating and kicking it to make it fit. Que some rapid knocking from the passenger window in the car next to me. I looked to see my wife frantically waving. My immediate thought was "What the hell is she doing in that car?" Frozen, staring at her for what seemed an eternity still tring to work out what the hell was going on she points to the passenger seat of the other car. I bend down to look in only to see the most terrified face of an elderley woman clutching her handbag. I just muttered "oops" and hastenly removed the offending object. Packed it into our new car which we had picked up only the day before. Her car was the same as our old car! Driving out past her we both gave her a sheepish aoplogetic wave. She just stared back like a rabbit caught in the headlight.

rambutman

years ago when i was in college - there was some flasher doing the rounds - he'd knock on the door of student ladies accommodation - they'd open the door and there'd he be in a ballaclava and a trench coat exhibiting his wares.

Anyway a girl i had previously went out with had a visit by him one night.....the police were called............they took a statement and asked her did she think it was anyone she knew - based on the hairy chest, height and build she thought it looked a bit like me so offered my name up to the police.......luckily enough for me i had a water-tight alibi for the night!!!!

byronbay2

Apanachi wrote: »

Something simiar happened a guy I knew in New York, he came home one night, totally wasted, to his rented appartent, he was living in an area where all the appartment look the same and were similarily furnished, he unlocked the front door, proceeded to his appartment, unlocked the door and flaked out on the sofa, he then noticed the TV was different, turned out he was in the wrong apparment block, apparently all the appartments had universal locks, he wasn't long getting on the phone to his landlord to get him to change his locks, lucikly the people who's appartement he was in were in bed and didn't hear him enter

Flirting with death there!!