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Have you witnessed someone lose their religiion

  • 10-05-2013 1:04am
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 3,655 ✭✭✭




    Happened someone close to me. They were devout until one day recently enough they said feck it, and while staying religious has kinda just given up on Catholicism.

    Have many other witnessed this? The church did kinda bring it upon themselves. The clowns.

    I'm protecting the children from abortion, but no priests nonsense.

    Additionally, can anyone see total Church and state separation? I think its going that way - since Enda in 2011 its definitely made progess. But I mean to the point where something like Brady stands up and someone says sit down and shut it.


«1

Comments

  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Just Micky Stipe. He told me that someone threw him in a corner and shed a spotlight on him which fried his faith. I think it was meant to be a secret as he told me he said too much.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,541 ✭✭✭Smidge


    had a priest in school who thought RE(obv) and after 30 years of being a priest, left the order, got married and had 2 children.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,373 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    Smidge wrote: »
    had a priest in school who thought RE(obv) and after 30 years of being a priest, left the order, got married and had 2 children.
    That's more quitting the job than losing the religion surely?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 271 ✭✭calanus


    There was that one time where it obviously fell behind the couch. I should have said something but they were probably better off losing it


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,473 ✭✭✭Wacker The Attacker


    I thought that I heard you laughing


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 35,514 ✭✭✭✭efb


    When Dylan dumped Brenda (again)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,541 ✭✭✭Smidge


    endacl wrote: »
    That's more quitting the job than losing the religion surely?

    LOL
    I don't think its really a "Job" to them.
    I think vocation is more the word.
    And to leave after 30 years to marry a woman, I'd class that as giving up your faith I guess


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,681 ✭✭✭ColeTrain


    I thought that I heard you laughing

    That's funny, I thought I heard him sing :confused:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,681 ✭✭✭ColeTrain


    Smidge wrote: »
    LOL

    And to leave after 30 years to marry a woman, I'd class that as giving up your faith I guess

    Or being desperate to get some poon.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,541 ✭✭✭Smidge


    ColeTrain wrote: »
    Or being desperate to get some poon.

    That is the other possibility:D


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,800 ✭✭✭Lingua Franca


    My grandad lost his faith shortly before he died. He'd previously watched his wife die slowly and for the whole time that she was dying she cried out for the aunt who'd raised her. Although she was surrounded by family, he felt that no one had "come for her" to give her succour and bring her to heaven and that she had died alone and went nowhere but into oblivion. He was quite distressed at having wasted so much of his life believing in what he now thought of as mumbo jumbo designed to oppress people. He didn't have time to come to terms with his new found atheism before he died.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,800 ✭✭✭Senna


    Yeah I seen my best mate lose his, around the back of a kids disco, she was a bit of a whale.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,785 ✭✭✭Ihatecuddles-old


    My grandad lost his faith shortly before he died. He'd previously watched his wife die slowly and for the whole time that she was dying she cired out for the aunt who'd raised her. Although she was surrounded by family, he felt that no one had "come for her" to give her succour and bring her to heaven and that she had died alone and went nowhere but into oblivion. He was quite distressed at having wasted so much of his life believing in what he now thought of as mumbo jumbo designed to oppress people. He didn't have time to come to terms with his new found atheism before he died.

    I have something in my eye :(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,900 ✭✭✭General General


    Indeed I have... pleased to meet you...


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,655 ✭✭✭El Inho


    My grandad lost his faith shortly before he died. He'd previously watched his wife die slowly and for the whole time that she was dying she cired out for the aunt who'd raised her. Although she was surrounded by family, he felt that no one had "come for her" to give her succour and bring her to heaven and that she had died alone and went nowhere but into oblivion. He was quite distressed at having wasted so much of his life believing in what he now thought of as mumbo jumbo designed to oppress people. He didn't have time to come to terms with his new found atheism before he died.

    No offense but I couldn't thank that...some wrong about thanking something so sad.:(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,716 ✭✭✭✭Galwayguy35


    No because I might talk everyday to people about a lot of things but religion ain't one of them.

    I couldn't care what religion someone has or if they have none, it seems to be a bit of an obsession for both sides on here though, one crowd want to convert everyone and the other lot make fun of peoples beliefs.


  • Registered Users Posts: 245 ✭✭Cosmicfox


    My mum when the priest gave some dodgy speech about 'letting go of the past' just after those recent abuse scandals and after watching some priest on a Vincent Browne interview (I can't remember who was on it).

    She'd usually drag us along at least every saturday night but hasn't after that. She's only set foot in a church after that when her dad died and at Christmas.

    It's kind of sad because she sometimes asks me about my opinion on the after life as if I'm going to re-assure her there is one, even though I stopped caring about mass and believing before she did.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,800 ✭✭✭Lingua Franca


    El Spearo wrote: »
    No offense but I couldn't thank that...some wrong about thanking something so sad.:(

    No worries, I feel bad myself for depressing everyone now instead of just quoting REM lyrics.

    Let's forget about it and be shiny happy people. Wanna hold hands?


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,537 ✭✭✭KKkitty


    A family member was in mass years ago and the priest was giving his usual sermon about people less well off and how people are homeless and struggling to pay bills. My family member thought about how the priest had a big house all to himself, flashy new car every year, holidays and no real responsibilities. My family member will only set foot inside a church if it's absolutely necessary now.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,572 ✭✭✭✭brummytom


    It happened to myself. I was never massively religious, but I did find a lot of comfort from it up until last February.

    When my uncle (who, as I've posted before, is in his 40s, has two youngs kids, has never smoked, done drugs, drank excessively) was diagnosed with terminal cancer I just thought 'fúck this'. My mom's gone a bit more the other way, looking for hope wherever she can, but she understands my feelings, which I'm pleased about.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 555 ✭✭✭tim3000


    I was kinda religious for most of my teens (saying 20ish prayers a day but never going to church or any of that craic) but after a series of personal setbacks deaths that kinda thing I just gave up. I still wouldn't classify myself as an atheist instead I would call myself more ambivalent


  • Registered Users Posts: 66 ✭✭AzN


    I was religious up until i hit 12 and really looked thoughtfully at religion and just realised i don't believe in such things, to this day i haven't told my christian family my beliefs due to their view of atheists in general.

    However witnessing family members lose their religion isn't something i've seen yet.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,314 ✭✭✭BOHtox


    I was at an REM concert once. Got in a picture too. That's me in the corner

    http://remhq.com/cms_files/images/cms_image_25086.jpg


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,299 ✭✭✭✭MadsL


    Is this another Alex Ferguson retirement thread?


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 64 ✭✭dartup


    rem

    Oh
    Life is bigger
    It's bigger than you
    And you are not me
    The lengths that I will go to,
    The distance in your eyes
    Oh, no I've said too much
    I set it up

    That's me in the corner
    That's me in the spotlight
    Losing my religion
    Trying to keep up with you
    And I don't know if I can do it
    Oh, no I've said too much
    I haven't said enough
    I thought that I heard you laughing
    I thought that I heard you sing
    I think I thought I saw you try

    Every whisper,
    Every waking hour I'm
    Choosing my confessions
    Trying to keep an eye on you
    Like a hurt, lost and blinded fool, fool
    Oh, no I've said too much
    I set it up

    Consider this
    Consider this
    The hint of the century
    Consider this
    The slip that brought me
    To my knees, failed
    What if all these fantasies
    Come flailing around
    Now I've said too much
    I thought that I heard you laughing
    I thought that I heard you sing
    I think I thought I saw you try

    But that was just a dream
    That was just a dream

    That's me in the corner
    That's me in the spotlight
    Losing my religion
    Trying to keep up with you
    And I don't know if I can do it
    Oh, no I've said too much
    I haven't said enough
    I thought that I heard you laughing
    I thought that I heard you sing
    I think I thought I saw you try

    But that was just a dream
    Try, cry, why try
    That was just a dream, just a dream, just a dream, dream


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    dartup wrote: »
    rem

    Oh
    Life ............

    Damn you. Had an REM joke waiting to go.......

    Also

    Answer OP: No

    *Obligatory "this is another anti religion thread, inferring that atheism is the only norm & everyone needs to get on that wagon" yada yada*


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,968 ✭✭✭✭Zebra3


    El Spearo wrote: »
    The church did kinda bring it upon themselves. The clowns. The child rapists.

    FYP.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,695 ✭✭✭December2012


    I used to be religious.

    On an Italian holiday I went to the Vatican.

    With its opulent riches and wealth built up over centuries, centuries during which they persecuted non Catholics and abused and exploited Catholics with their demands of contributions and using embarrassment and shame as a weapon I left there firmly convinced that it was not a religion for me.

    Having seen other religions holy buildings I think they are the same - money building power building cults.

    I used to believe in God but not any more. I believe in science now.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,371 ✭✭✭Phoebas


    Have you checked down the back of the sofa?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,672 ✭✭✭✭Mr. CooL ICE


    One of the turning points for me was when a priest came to class and gave a talk. We all knew he was airy-fairy, but when he went on about how god created the universe and all living things, I suddenly realised that this wasn't a figure of speech and that he actually wanted us to believe this. Just when some guy who was supposed to have an air of authority was talking absolute nonsense and being serious about it, I just thought "ah now, c'mon..."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    Up until a few years ago, I was quite religious and a big believer in my Catholic religion.

    After a string of horrendous things happening, with people telling me 'Oh, god tests you with these things,' I realised that the notion of god is a crock of shít. People aren't raped, attacked, robbed, mugged, given cancer and stuff like that as a test. It happens because of genetic mutation (for things like cancer) and because people are fúcking scumbags. If god existed, sure we probably wouldn't have a fantastic life, but we wouldn't have all those awful things happen either, because they go against the teachings of the Catholic religion.

    Instead of praying to god to fix **** for me, I got up off my hole, stopped praying and tackled anything bad in my life, one thing at a time.

    I'm a million times happier now that I don't believe in any religion. The only time I set foot in a church is for a funeral, christening or a wedding.

    My mum is fuming that I'm a non-believer, but hey, let her believe in what she likes and I'll believe in what I like. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,968 ✭✭✭✭Zebra3


    I used to be religious.

    On an Italian holiday I went to the Vatican.

    With its opulent riches and wealth built up over centuries, centuries during which they persecuted non Catholics and abused and exploited Catholics with their demands of contributions and using embarrassment and shame as a weapon I left there firmly convinced that it was not a religion for me.

    All those chopped off lads as well. :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,390 ✭✭✭IM0


    my dad dances like that at weddings


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,492 ✭✭✭Hoop66


    I used to work with a guy who was a full-on, fundamentalist, young-earth creationist. The kind of person you can't say "jesus" around because you get a lecture on taking the lord's name etc etc. I would occasionally argue gently with him, but he was so set in his faith and his determination that god made the world 600 years ago, it was depressing.

    Over a weekend, he went from that to a full-on hard atheist, cursing all religion and decrying believers as fools.

    I think he was a bit mental tbh.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,283 ✭✭✭✭MadYaker


    I don't think I ever lost it, because I never had it in the first place. My father is an atheist but my mother isn't and I think when I was around 12 or 13 I started to realise it was all a load of nonsense.


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  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    First hand here. Always considered Catholic/Christian to be the "Default Setting," so to say. It's how I was brought up through school and such. We were never really taught what religion was. Then I found out about Islam as a teenager watching some documentary late at night. It was at that point I lost it. No intention of seeking it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    I've witnessed most people I know come from a position of obligated catholicism growing up to a position of either not giving a crap about it, or coming to the full realisation that they don't believe. Very few people I know have maintained the same faith they were told to have as a child.

    Can't say I've ever seen anyone have a sudden conversion though. It's usually a gradual process because it takes your brain time to let go of various crutches and realise they're not needed.

    I know a few people who are on the verge but can't cognitively let go. They've tried to have conversations with me along the lines of, "You believe in something, right", but after about two minutes the difficult questions come out and they very quickly say, "Ah, this is too deep for a Saturday night, let's talk about something else". I believe these people want to be able to question their faith but are afraid to lest they lose it.

    Though for my first two years in secondary school there was a young hip student priest/teacher called brother Eddie, probably in his twenties. Then we came back after summer one year and he was just "Eddie" and no longer wore robes or taught religion. I don't know if he lost his religion or just realised that he was too much a fan of the vagina.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,260 ✭✭✭Viper_JB


    To me it always seemed like there were two parts and two histories to the catholic church, the one they wanted you to know and the one they don't advertise and don't want people to focus on so much, and for me the more information I discovered and learned about my religion the less I wanted to be a part of it, to the point now where I really believe the church is a bad thing, so I guess I witnessed myself losing my religion :) better for it though, my life without religion is a life without questions being answered by "just have faith".


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,812 ✭✭✭✭sbsquarepants


    efb wrote: »
    When Dylan dumped Brenda (again)

    That was loosing his mind not his religion, Brenda was HOT:)


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,297 ✭✭✭Jaxxy


    I never really had it in the first place. When I reached the age of about twelve it just completely stopped making sense for me. My brother is also an atheist, my mother too and my father is agnostic. As for my peers I have noticed a huge, but gradual shift in their beliefs. Most people I know now are atheist or agnostic, with only one friend I can think of that I would describe as being practicing. A couple turned back to religion after deaths in their immediate family, which is understandable, but most became seriously disillusioned with the church after many of the horrific scandals broke.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,678 ✭✭✭I Heart Internet


    I used to believe in the power of AH but I've lost faith due to all of the thinly veiled "isn't the catholic church awful" threads.

    I now just go to AH to be seen and to please the elderly moderators.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,736 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    I used to be religious.

    On an Italian holiday I went to the Vatican.

    With its opulent riches and wealth built up over centuries, centuries during which they persecuted non Catholics and abused and exploited Catholics with their demands of contributions and using embarrassment and shame as a weapon I left there firmly convinced that it was not a religion for me.

    Having seen other religions holy buildings I think they are the same - money building power building cults.
    Kind of the same here. I used to enjoy going to see churches because of the lovely architecture, these days I can barely bring myself to set foot in the door after going to Paris and seeing the amount of gold in Notre Dame and Sacré Coeur, and realising that while the church was amassing all that wealth the common people, who the church has always purported to help, were dying in poverty in the streets, and I got to thinking about how many could have been housed and fed with the hoarded gold.

    It wasn't what spurred me to give up religion (that was hearing a priest lecturing people on how to raise their children when I was about 12), but it is what made me sure that I would never change my mind.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,174 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wibbs


    seamus wrote: »
    I've witnessed most people I know come from a position of obligated catholicism growing up to a position of either not giving a crap about it, or coming to the full realisation that they don't believe. Very few people I know have maintained the same faith they were told to have as a child
    Ditto, though I have known a few people who have gravitated towards other belief systems like your vague new age stuff. Others when asked would have some sort of a vague expectation of something being out there.

    Spirituality in Ireland is so wrapped up in Catholicism and the latterly usually very strident rejection of that. I can understand that of course considering the monumental fcukups and sheer evil in a few cases that have come to light. Among younger folks I don't get some of the vigour behind it TBH, given that your average 20 year old has grown up in a much changed Ireland compared to say a 50 year old*. An 80 year old has lived through even more of a difference.

    Me, I grew up in an Ireland closer to the 50 year old than the 20. That said, I don't carry much if any anger towards clergy. I just see/saw them as believing their stuff and so long as they left me alone game ball. That said me and my peers were lucky in that the priests we knew(and were educated by) had no "kiddie fiddlers" among them. Indeed we were warned by them about such people more than once and told to seek help if that shít went down. Most were fairly sound/normal and some were genuinely kind human beings. I can only recall one utter prick and he would have been an utter prick in or out of a cassock. That said I did know guys who had christian brothers for teachers and many of them were right evil bastards. Heard some stories about right bitches of nuns too.

    It's just my humble of course, but I do think we've overswung the pendulum of blame regarding the Catholic church. Not unlike those people who when adults blame all their woes, past and present on a bad parent. They and we as a nation need to get over that IMH. It's too easy to say it was all the churches fault. People seem to overlook the fact that the people of this nation, their mothers and fathers and grandparents etc who supported that church and often helped hide the evil that was going on. Turned the blind eye and all that. I think there's still the smell of some collective guilt buried in the anti clergy meme.

    I became agnostic at around 12 years of age. Funny enough it was a priest, one of my teachers who put a name to it and loaned me books on philosophy and theology. Nice man. Actually thinking on it, one of my more obvious feelings concerning the priests I knew is sadness for them. Many of them would have made good fathers, but they missed out on that, because of their restrictive faith.





    *exceptions would be the still crazy situation regarding women's reproductive choices which are still very pertinent today.

    Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.



  • Registered Users Posts: 937 ✭✭✭swimming in a sea


    I like to think I'm a believer in something, but not organized religion. I used to go to church when younger simply so i could get sweets in the shop since i lived out in the sticks. I never went in but it was nice to have a chat with your mates at the church gate.

    I always hated how the church stuck its nose into everything when growing up, in primary school the parish priest would a few times every week wonder into our school mid class to blabber on about some crap, then every thing from the opening of a phone box to a wedding anniversary had to have a mass as part of the celebration(some fun there).

    Just wondering how many with strong views here will still let their wife\husband to be or family pressurize them into a church wedding\christening their children etc


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,109 ✭✭✭RikkFlair


    seamus wrote: »
    Though for my first two years in secondary school there was a young hip student priest/teacher called brother Eddie, probably in his twenties. Then we came back after summer one year and he was just "Eddie" and no longer wore robes or taught religion. I don't know if he lost his religion or just realised that he was too much a fan of the vagina.

    I'm picturing him wearing sunglasses and preaching to the class via rap music.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,678 ✭✭✭I Heart Internet


    Just wondering how many with strong views here will still let their wife\husband to be or family pressurize them into a church wedding\christening their children etc

    Your forgetting the key aspect of a successful marriage - compromise.

    A couple where (for example) one is an active catholic and one is a non-believer has two aspects to it. There is no just the hard-pressed agnostic/atheist being "railroaded" into a church wedding by a dominant catholic boyfried. There is also a catholic who would dearly like to have their marriage according to the rights of his faith. Two people - so they compromise (somehow - it's different for different couples). Ditto regarding children.

    You must remember that for a catholic not to have their child baptised (for example) is not just a passive "well we diecided not to, it's fine". It can be a source of great pain and distress. Likewise, no doubt, for an atheist, or more particularly, a person who actively dislikes the church, I'm sure it can be distressing to see their child receive that church's sacraments. But again - two sides.

    You'll note I didn't highlight "or family" in your response as this should be a very, very minor issue (if at all). It's for parents to decide (and eventually, in due course, the young person).


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,205 ✭✭✭Benny_Cake


    Wibbs put it quite well, spirituality and religion are instantly associated with Catholicism by most Irish people. I can understand the hostility many feel towards the Catholic church, but at times the reaction seems to be more one of anti-theism rather than atheism. I've met one or two people who've made strident denunciations of religious belief in the company of people they didn't even know, and I'd imagine if it was the 1950s the same people would have probably been the most fundamentalist Catholics in the parish. Some people just tend towards the extremes.

    I never lost my faith, but religion in the sense of Catholicism - it was a drawn out process that took quite a long time. The scandals, the nonsensical position on contraception, support for discrimination against gay people combined with a number of other factors..eventually I realised I was describing myself as a Catholic when deep down it simply wasn't a part of me anymore. When I was honest to myself about that it came as something of a relief. I look at a church that seems to see no issue in putting out someone as compromised as Sean Brady to fight their corner and I just can't see myself ever going back. On a personal level I had no issues with priests or brothers etc, although there was one brother in my school who was an utter creep. People such as Peter McVerry, Helen Prejean and others who fight for justice still have my admiration, it's just a shame that the good they do is overshadowed by the misdeeds of those above them.

    So my faith is a personal thing now, I still pray but I only go to Mass in the event of a funeral or wedding, when I sit there quietly and am often the only person who remains seated during communion. It works for me, and I've come to realise that no one has all the answers. Which makes life a lot more interesting than having a sense of absolute certainty about what it's all about.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,928 ✭✭✭✭rainbow kirby


    Just wondering how many with strong views here will still let their wife\husband to be or family pressurize them into a church wedding\christening their children etc

    No way. To get married in a church would be to start married life with a lie, and the thought of that disgusts me. I won't have them christened either - again, I'm not going to stand there and talk absolute rubbish to keep other people happy.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,522 ✭✭✭StudentDad


    Religion and Belief don't always go hand in hand.

    The bit about some organised religions that has always irritated me, is the notion that a particular sect has the inside track on god and if you want to get into his good books you have to 'follow their path.'

    That's fine as a way of life. There is merit in living a christian or other faith based life.

    However, when it comes to the RC church. I do not see an organisation that practices what it preaches.

    So when it comes to belief in god or the Flying Spaghetti Monster to my mind that's a personal thing and the organisation that is a church is irrelevant.

    SD


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,052 ✭✭✭Matt_Trakker


    Before my communion I asked my folks was Mary really a virgin and was it really Jesus' body we eat at communion, they told me to ask my uncle, a priest.
    So I did, He told me no, Mary wasn't a virgin but gave birth to a son before she was married, but she didn't commit sin (sex before marriage).
    He said that we eat consecrated bread that turns into the body of Jesus when its blessed.
    That's when I stopped believing in anything, you can't have sex and still be a virgin there's no way I want to be part of a religion that pretends to it its savior (a tradition stolen from a previous Egyptian religion btw)......although I was still marched to mass every Saturday until I was about 16 or so.

    Didn't really embrace my atheism until a few years ago, I suppose I was always kinda hoping that there was something, but it's fairly easy to see that there isn't.
    But life is short and should be embraced and enjoyed.


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