Got to say Goodbye in a dream

LegacyUser

This maybe in wrong place, if it is, i apologise. but i had to share.

bit of background.. my cousin of 28 years died almost 9 years ago suddenly.. I hadn't seen him in about 8 months before he died.

Even though we were weren't super close (he a few years older) It hit me pretty hard at the time, i was in college, was depressed when i went back, wanted to leave.

Shortly after he died, i remember dreaming about being stuck in some storm and he was beside me and i wasnt worried because he was there.

tbh, i dont think i've really dreamt of him much since..


Last night, he was in my dream.. except it was like i was back around the time he died.. and i saw him.. and knew what happen so i phoned 999 to no avail and called again.. i just cried to them telling them to hurry because i know how this will all pan out.

Next thing, he goes past me up a stairs.. i called out to him, said bye and blew him a kiss and he blew one back..

I woke up and got quite upset..

It was bittersweet because i got so panicked in dream knowing he going to die, trying to stop it.. but at same time.. i felt like i got to say Goodbye to him...

it always bothered me that we'd not been in contact in months before he died.


I know some people think dreams are just dreams but this one was extra weird/special to me..

I have been to an unusual amount of wakes/funerals/ anniversary masses this year but thats where it coming from.

ivytwine

Hi Caredfor, sorry to hear about your cousin.

Something similar happened to me when a schoolfriend died in a crash about a year and a half ago. I wouldn't have been very close to this girl, we hung out in the same group but she was a lot closer to two of my closest friends than me. Would never have met up with her on our own or anything. Also we went to different colleges, so would have only chatted to her the odd weekend when I bumped into her at home.

Anyway, after her funeral I had an extremely vivid dream. I was was walking down main street at home, back in my old school uniform, and this girl passed against me on the street. I began to say hello, and I remembered she was dead. I was kind of mildly surprised, like you would be if you met someone at home who said they were going to Dublin or something for the day or something. So I said, "But, [Girl's Name], you're dead." And she just kept smiling at me, the only word I can use to describe her smile is beatific, she was like an angel smiling at me. She walked on and the dream ended.

That dream brought me a lot of comfort. If there is another plane, I like to think of her happy on it. And if not, if it was just my subconscious' way of dealing with it, it also brought peace.

I think this is a very common phenomenon and is part of the process of working through grief. I wish you all the very best x

angeleyes

Caredfor - I think it was lovely that you had this dream even if it was bittersweet and it brought you that famous word closure. This was a way of your cousin helping you to deal with his death and to be at peace with it. Blowing each other a kiss was really very special and shows a bond that you both had. I am sorry that you lost your cousin so suddenly but I am sure that your cousin was in his own way telling you he is ok. I always think that when a person passes away and goes to Heaven or wherever that place of peace or bright light is they are happy and if given the chance to come back to earth would say no. There are so many stories and testimonies of people who have "died" and didn't want to come back only to be told "its not your time".

I had a lovely dream of my mother a few weeks after she died and it released me from so much grief that in fact I did stop grieving as I knew she was happy. I dreamt that I was in my brother's kitchen sitting at the table and just turned and saw my Mam. I said "oh Mam is that you are you ok?" and she said she was. I then asked what Heaven was like and she said "Lovely" and I asked her if she had met Our Lady (my mother had great devotion to Our Lady) and she said "I have and she is lovely" I asked her if she liked her funeral and she said she did - and that was the dream. My mam's sister was a bit peeved that I had a dream of my mother and she didn't but my sister in law who is a medium said that at my mother's months mind she could see my mother on the alter and 4 rays of light which would have been me and my brother and sister. When I asked my SIL why not my aunt she just said "your children are your children".

Anyway sorry for going on Carefor - I think your dream had a lovely strong message for you and even though you did try to prevent something from happening - there are things beyond our control and your cousin was telling you he is ok.

movingsucks

My granny died not long before my wedding and between the death and the wedding I had a dream of being at a function with the family gathered around a big grand staircase. Next thing my grandmother appeared and I said "Oh you're back! Great you'll be at the wedding".
Of course she wasn't but she was in me head/heart and thats what counts.

Rubberlegs

My Dad died about 6 weeks before Christmas '10. On Christmas Eve morning, just before I woke, I dreamt I was standing outside his house, with him, my mother and sister. He looked so well, and was smiling at me. He put his arm around my shoulder, as he always used to do. I swear I felt the weight of his arm around me. He leant in to kiss my cheek, at which point I was woken by himself snoring:rolleyes:. But I woke with a smile on my face. The dream had been so vivid, I felt I had really been with him, and that it was his way of telling me he was OK.

Hoochiemama

My best friend passed away in October 2011.

A few months after his death, I had a really really vivid dream about him. I dont really ever remember details about dreams but I could tell you every minute detail of this dream

I dreamt that me and him were in this night club we used to always go to. We were running around laughing our heads off. We had this special laugh that we used to always use when we were together. We sat down on a couch and we were laughing. I remember feeling so light hearted and free in the laughter.

Suddenly he stopped and looked at me and grabbed my hand and said "You do know, everything is going to be ok" Then he gave me a massive hug and I woke up.

From that moment on, I felt ENORMOUS peace when it comes to him, his spirit and it was a huge turning point in my grieving process.

Whether it's a dream, his spirit, a figment of my imagination... who cares. If you get peace from it, then dont question it, just accept that peace. xxx

ibarelycare

Something similar happened me OP, and I've never really spoken to anyone about it.

My dad died when I was 5. I don't have many memories of him, which is very sad for me. I also never got to grieve properly because I was too young to understand what was happening at the time.

About 5 years ago (when I was about 22) I started thinking about him a lot again, and started having lots of dreams about him. Instead of this being a comfort for me, I found it very difficult. This went on for a few weeks and it felt like I was properly grieving for the first time. It was very distressing and upsetting. At the time I was asking my mam about him all the time. I asked her what his final words to her were (he was ill with cancer) and I asked her if he said anything specific about us (the kids) before he passed, and she said he didn't. That made me so sad, and also angry. I was angry at my brother and sisters as they got to have memories of him and to actually know him, and I didn't. I was angry at myself for not making the most of him when he was alive. I was angry at my dad for not giving my mam messages for the children.

Anyway a few days after that conversation with my mam, I had another vivid dream about him. In it he was wearing this grey hat and coat that he always wore, we still have both of them in a closet in our house so I'm very familiar with them. I can't remember if we talked but at the end of my dream he gave me a big hug and just held me.

After that the dreams stopped. I've probably dreamed about him a few times since, but nothing as vivid as the ones at that time. I don't believe in angels or ghosts or anything, but that dream gave me so much comfort. It was kind of like closure to me and I felt so happy after it.