2 Funnies

MonkieSocks

A middle-aged couple had finally learned how to send and receive texts on their mobile phones.

The wife, being a romantic at heart, decided one day that she'd send her husband a text while she was out of the house having coffee with a friend.

She texted:

If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.
If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite.
If you are drinking, send me a sip.
If you are crying, send me your tears.
I love you.

The husband, being a no-nonsense sort of guy, texted back:


I'm on the toilet. Please advise...

___________________________________________________________


Death came to a guy and said,"My friend today is your day...".

The guy said,"But I am not ready!".

Then death said,"Well your name is the next on my list...".

So the guy told death,"Ok why don't you take a seat and I will get you something to eat before we go?".

Then death said,"All right...".

The guy gave death some food with sleeping pills in it, death finished eating and fell into a deep sleep.

The guy took the list & removed his name from top of the list to the bottom of the list.

When death woke up he said to the guy, "I will start from the bottom of the list because you have been so very nice to me..

patmac

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