Long termers TTC

Denise2007

brokensoul wrote: »

Thanks.

Did you have to have a D&C? If so, is it painful?

(obviously, don't answer if you are uncomfortable doing so)

I don't mind at all answering. I was very confused what to do. The baby stopped growing at 6 weeks 3 days we found out on the 8 week scan. My best friend who had been through a similar miscarraige recommended letting nature take its course. The doctor made an appointment for me a week after the original scan at Holles Street for confirmation and only after that would they schedule a D&C as the first early scan was private.

I decided to let nature take its course as it was early. My initial reaction was to just get the D&C as I just wanted it over with and waiting for it to happen is awful. I had heard a D&C can sometimes scrape too much lining and this was a consideration. Letting it happen naturally was very painful but it helped with the grieving. The doctor said if it didn't happen naturally within 2 weeks they would need to bring me in to have the D&C. I began to miscarry within the week after the second scan, they then brought me back to Holles St to confirm all was ok on a third scan.

It's a very personal choice. I'm so sorry you're going through this and thoughts with you x

contrary_mary

I had a D&C and honestly it was not painful afterwards - I had cramping that evening and the next morning but a couple of panadol sorted that. It is a very standard procedure for them so please don't worry you have enough going on.

Sorry for your loss. Same thing happened me on my first pregnancy after fertility treatment and it nearly broke me - I went to a counsellor associated with my clinic and I think it helped. Be good to yourself.

stickybean

So today is CD 44, so disheartened.

Did a test to be sure but it was negative. So sick of irregular cycles. We were to start ICSI treatment 2 weeks ago. I wish for once my period would just hurry up.

My cousin announced she was pregnant last night... sometimes, its soooo hard to smile

Hollywood130

It sure is Sticky...

Yellow diamond

I am so sorry for all the ladies on this thread going through such difficult times....life can be so unfair. I hope you don't mind me joining in this thread as a newbie. I started the pill yesterday and was told to take it for two weeks, then I start buserelin injections for six weeks and start taking the fhm injections in four weeks time along with the buserelin.all going well egg collection will start second week of September. It feels daunting but staying focused.

dreamstar

Brokensoul I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I miscarried naturally for two weeks and ended up having a D&C then. Or an ERPC they called it. Once I had the procedure I had no bleeding and not much pain at all. Honestly it's really not painful. The emotional side of it is hardest but you'll get through it hun. Xxx

dreamstar

stickybean wrote:

My cousin announced she was pregnant last night... sometimes, its soooo hard to smile

Yep. Sometimes I feel I'm turning into a horrible person because some days I can't find the energy to be happy for other people. It's so so hard.

Tinkerbell 03

Best wishes yellow diamond... Yeah sticky its very true so hard to smile sometimes...

Well I landed back home early Friday morning... Ah feels good to be home for a bit...

dreamstar

Tinkerbell 03 wrote: »

Well I landed back home early Friday morning... Ah feels good to be home for a bit...

Aw I'm sure a break away will do you the world of good Tinkerbell.
How are you feeling? Are you hoe for long?

Hollywood130

Yellow Diamond, I'm having IVF too, at the moment I'm on Synarel nasal spray for Down Reg, I'm on Day 12 of this. Have down reg scan on Friday, looking forward to getting that far, should be starting injections all going well then.

Hope you feel better soon Tinkerbell, a break can't hurt.

Tinkerbell 03

dreamstar wrote: »

Aw I'm sure a break away will do you the world of good Tinkerbell.
How are you feeling? Are you hoe for long?

Hiya...am home for 3 weeks staying in a friends house...feeling good today! Hope all is well with you xxx

stickybean

Right girls... anyone know any reason why your period would be late (apart from the obvious (which we have ruled out)).

I have an irregular cycle... but we are coming up to CD 49 and I am literally cracking up here... we were to start IVF / ICSI almost 3 weeks ago and we are still here. My cycle has only once been 52 days but that was a few years ago. generally it can be from 24 - 35 days

The clinic said it could be down to stress... but at a time like this its hard to be calm.

dreamstar

stickybean wrote: »

Right girls... anyone know any reason why your period would be late (apart from the obvious (which we have ruled out)).

I have an irregular cycle... but we are coming up to CD 49 and I am literally cracking up here... we were to start IVF / ICSI almost 3 weeks ago and we are still here. My cycle has only once been 52 days but that was a few years ago. generally it can be from 24 - 35 days

The clinic said it could be down to stress... but at a time like this its hard to be calm.

Oh sticky you poor thing. I am similar in that I get quite irregular periods. Usually 32 days but sometimes up to 36 / 37. This happened me over Christmas where I had one random cycle of 51 days. I was so worried but my GP said sometimes that can just happen randomly and it would only be a problem if it happened regularly.

I know it's frustrating but I would imagine the clinic are right. The longer you are waiting the more anxious you get. I'm sure you are nervous / excited about starting IVF and this with the late period could cause unconscious stress.

Obviously it's the worst timing ever but don't worry - as we all know it always shows up eventually. Easier said than done but try keep busy and keep your mind off it and no doubt it will arrive at the most inconvenient time.

Has anything unusual happened this month? Like did you have a smear or a cold or anything done in the clinic that could have affected something?

I really feel for you - nothing worse than being mentally prepared to get started and this stopping you. But you'll get there.

brokensoul

So 6 days later and still no sign of miscarriage. I think the pregnancy symptoms are lessening, but to be honest am so up in a heap I am not even sure about that.

Scan booked for tomorrow morning to confirm the inevitable and then D&C will be scheduled. Would prefer to miscarry naturally, but I don't think I can bear to wait much longer. Never thought I would find myself hoping for a miscarriage ;-(

We have 5 frozen embryos with the clinic from out IVF cycle. Does anyone know if this MMC means that there is or may be an issue with all of them? The thought of going through an embryo transfer again is daunting, but the thought of starting IVF from the start again is so much more so.

stickybean

Dreamstar, thank you so much for this! Really nice to hear someone understands that I'm not a crazy person

The only thing I had this month was the catheter trial on CD 7. But I have been very stressed... I am terrified of needles and the whole IVF / ICSI treatment although I want to start I am terrified deep down.

I read online that positivity can really help and having a physical item to focus on can make it more real. I spoke with the OH last night, we are going to go buy one very small thing, maybe a bear or vest, just one small thing.

When I went to acupuncture last year the girl said to imagine yourself pregnant, rub your belly and think there will be a little baby there soon, then imagine holding that baby, kissing their head, stroking their hand. At the time sounded a bit mad, but at this stage, I am going to give it a try...

dreamstar wrote: »

Oh sticky you poor thing. I am similar in that I get quite irregular periods. Usually 32 days but sometimes up to 36 / 37. This happened me over Christmas where I had one random cycle of 51 days. I was so worried but my GP said sometimes that can just happen randomly and it would only be a problem if it happened regularly.

I know it's frustrating but I would imagine the clinic are right. The longer you are waiting the more anxious you get. I'm sure you are nervous / excited about starting IVF and this with the late period could cause unconscious stress.

Obviously it's the worst timing ever but don't worry - as we all know it always shows up eventually. Easier said than done but try keep busy and keep your mind off it and no doubt it will arrive at the most inconvenient time.

Has anything unusual happened this month? Like did you have a smear or a cold or anything done in the clinic that could have affected something?

I really feel for you - nothing worse than being mentally prepared to get started and this stopping you. But you'll get there.

stickybean

Aw Brokensoul, I am so sorry you are going through such a difficult time xxx

Could they allow you a few more days to see if you can go naturally?


Sorry I'm not sure about the other embryos xxx

brokensoul wrote: »

So 6 days later and still no sign of miscarriage. I think the pregnancy symptoms are lessening, but to be honest am so up in a heap I am not even sure about that.

Scan booked for tomorrow morning to confirm the inevitable and then D&C will be scheduled. Would prefer to miscarry naturally, but I don't think I can bear to wait much longer. Never thought I would find myself hoping for a miscarriage ;-(

We have 5 frozen embryos with the clinic from out IVF cycle. Does anyone know if this MMC means that there is or may be an issue with all of them? The thought of going through an embryo transfer again is daunting, but the thought of starting IVF from the start again is so much more so.

dreamstar

brokensoul wrote: »

So 6 days later and still no sign of miscarriage. I think the pregnancy symptoms are lessening, but to be honest am so up in a heap I am not even sure about that.

Scan booked for tomorrow morning to confirm the inevitable and then D&C will be scheduled. Would prefer to miscarry naturally, but I don't think I can bear to wait much longer. Never thought I would find myself hoping for a miscarriage ;-(

We have 5 frozen embryos with the clinic from out IVF cycle. Does anyone know if this MMC means that there is or may be an issue with all of them? The thought of going through an embryo transfer again is daunting, but the thought of starting IVF from the start again is so much more so.

Brokensoul I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I was the same as you and was told at the scan I had a missed miscarriage - I was DEVASTATED. I did start bleeding the very next day which I never realised was a good thing really. I can't imagine going 6 days with nothing. Even when I started miscarrying the bleeding went on for two weeks. It didn't just happen over a day or two. And even after those two weeks I still needed a D&C.

If it were me going through it again I would have requested a D&C as soon as possible. Just to get things sorted and allow me to heal and move on. There's nothing worse than being in limbo. But everyone is different and you need to do what feels right for you. I really hope you're doing ok.

With the frozen embryos - I can't imagine that because this pregnancy didn't work out that any further ones would be the same. But I'm sure the clinic will go through all of this with you. They'll understand how nervous you will be.

Take care of yourself hun. XXX

contrary_mary

Brokensoul the ERPC is nothing to worry about and if there is no sign of you going naturally (no bleeding) then it really is the best option. At least you can begin to recover physically after it.

Regarding the other embryos - each one was made from a different egg and a different sperm and is genetically separate from the others. The MMC won't change that.

brokensoul

contrary_mary wrote: »

Brokensoul the ERPC is nothing to worry about and if there is no sign of you going naturally (no bleeding) then it really is the best option. At least you can begin to recover physically after it.

Regarding the other embryos - each one was made from a different egg and a different sperm and is genetically separate from the others. The MMC won't change that.

Thanks for that. It makes sense when you put it like that.

I would be happy to get the D&C over with to be honest. Dr is only preforming them on Thursday this week though, and apparently his list is full so waiting for the clinic to confirm with him if he can do it on Friday. If not I will have to wait until next week.

Edit - call from the clinic at lunchtime to confirm that the earliest they can do the D&C is next Tuesday. Not the news I was hoping for. They mentioned that they need to do blood tests pre D&C, does anyone know why they do that?

dreamstar

stickybean wrote: »

Dreamstar, thank you so much for this! Really nice to hear someone understands that I'm not a crazy person

The only thing I had this month was the catheter trial on CD 7. But I have been very stressed... I am terrified of needles and the whole IVF / ICSI treatment although I want to start I am terrified deep down.

I'd imagine this is all it is sticky. You're going through a major process which is exciting / scary / nerve wrecking.
Be patient with yourself and things will fall into place.

Buying something small to remind you of what it's all for is a lovely idea. Like I said before different things work for different people so do whatever makes you feel more relaxed. And treat yourself...... a lot!

pwurple

stickybean wrote: »

Right girls... anyone know any reason why your period would be late (apart from the obvious (which we have ruled out)).

I have an irregular cycle... but we are coming up to CD 49 and I am literally cracking up here... we were to start IVF / ICSI almost 3 weeks ago and we are still here. My cycle has only once been 52 days but that was a few years ago. generally it can be from 24 - 35 days

The clinic said it could be down to stress... but at a time like this its hard to be calm.

Mine was always irregular as well... up to 60-80 days, and we were lined up for ICSI too. Sometimes going for a long walk or a jog would help me. Putting my body under a bit of physical stress. Cleared the head too.

contrary_mary

brokensoul wrote: »

Edit - call from the clinic at lunchtime to confirm that the earliest they can do the D&C is next Tuesday. Not the news I was hoping for. They mentioned that they need to do blood tests pre D&C, does anyone know why they do that?

Oh that's a pity but at least this time next week it will all be over with and hopefully you'll be tucked up at home. They do take bloods on admission - I think it's just the standard things - full blood count (to check general health and that you don't need iron supplements) and blood type (in case you're rhesus negative and need anti-d).

brokensoul

contrary_mary wrote: »

Oh that's a pity but at least this time next week it will all be over with and hopefully you'll be tucked up at home. They do take bloods on admission - I think it's just the standard things - full blood count (to check general health and that you don't need iron supplements) and blood type (in case you're rhesus negative and need anti-d).

Thanks again for the answer. I am a blood donor so I know I am RH+ but it makes sense that they would have to check that.

It is a good way of looking at it that at least in a week it will be over. Hadn't thought of it like that!

It feels very odd to be facing the clinic in the morning. I am a natural worrier so I always fret before scans. It feels utterly bizarre to have nothing to fret about in that they have already given me all the bad news.

contrary_mary

brokensoul wrote: »

Thanks again for the answer. I am a blood donor so I know I am RH+ but it makes sense that they would have to check that.

It is a good way of looking at it that at least in a week it will be over. Hadn't thought of it like that!

It feels very odd to be facing the clinic in the morning. I am a natural worrier so I always fret before scans. It feels utterly bizarre to have nothing to fret about in that they have already given me all the bad news.

I know exactly what you mean. Usually for scans you're worrying about follicles or lining or something. Did your clinic not refer you to a hospital for management of the mc? That's what happened with my mmc but my clinic is attached to the hospital so maybe it's different if that's not the case?

brokensoul

contrary_mary wrote: »

I know exactly what you mean. Usually for scans you're worrying about follicles or lining or something. Did your clinic not refer you to a hospital for management of the mc? That's what happened with my mmc but my clinic is attached to the hospital so maybe it's different if that's not the case?

The clinic (Cork fertility clinic) seems to have links to both the bons and CUMH. I am under Dr Waterstone in the clinic and so he will do the D&C in CUMH for me.

I previously had fibroids removed and it seemed to work similarly. Scans done in the clinic, op done in the bons and then after care scans etc done in the clinic.

Not sure if this is the norm or not.

contrary_mary

brokensoul wrote: »

The clinic (Cork fertility clinic) seems to have links to both the bons and CUMH. I am under Dr Waterstone in the clinic and so he will do the D&C in CUMH for me.

I previously had fibroids removed and it seemed to work similarly. Scans done in the clinic, op done in the bons and then after care scans etc done in the clinic.

Not sure if this is the norm or not.

Ah quite similar then. I was with Merrion Fertility which is part of NMH. When I had my scan that revealed the mmc they transferred me to NMH from then on but my consultant worked in both so it's very closely linked.

I've heard of Dr. Waterstone on forums over the years I'd say you're in good hands.

dreamstar

brokensoul wrote: »

Edit - call from the clinic at lunchtime to confirm that the earliest they can do the D&C is next Tuesday. Not the news I was hoping for. They mentioned that they need to do blood tests pre D&C, does anyone know why they do that?

When I was going through my miscarriage they took bloods every couple of days. They are checking the HcG hormone. This is the one that detects pregnancy in the pregnancy test. They just check that to make sure it's coming down as this diagnoses the miscarriage. It's normal procedure that they have to do.

It's a pity that you have to wait until Tuesday but at least you know you will be sorted then. Have been thinking of you - hope you're ok.

brokensoul

contrary_mary wrote: »

Ah quite similar then. I was with Merrion Fertility which is part of NMH. When I had my scan that revealed the mmc they transferred me to NMH from then on but my consultant worked in both so it's very closely linked.

I've heard of Dr. Waterstone on forums over the years I'd say you're in good hands.

Yeah, I have faith in him, despite him telling me after my myeomectomy that he thought I wouldn't need any more fertility treatment - some prediction that turned out to be!

Had confirmation scan and blood this morning. They talked through what to expect from the D&C and also what my options are from here. They recommend waiting one cycle after my next period and then transferring one of my frozen embryos. They said that (odd as it may sound) they would consider it a positive thing that I got pregnant, even if I miscarried as it shows that I can get pregnant. Guess I had not thought of it that way, but it did give me some comfort.

They would not recommend embryo testing now as the combination of needing to thaw and refreeze the embryo and the cost of it means that they would only recommend it for recurring mc. Presume this is normal?

So my plan now is to get past D&C next Tuesday and then start on a healthy eating and exercise regime (as I have put on half a stone between the IVF cycle and pregnancy) and aim towards another transfer cycle in the Autumn. Not the greatest of plans, but a plan none the less I suppose...

nemo32

Hi Brokensoul, I'm so sorry to hear about your MMC, it's hard to take but even harder after fertility treatment I feel. I had a MMC at 10 weeks after my 3rd transfer. I was happy that I could get pregnant and this is what i took as a positive from the whole process. I did however ask for testing on the embryo after the ERPC, it made me feel better having this done as I knew there was a chromosome issue with the baby and was never going to reach 40 weeks. As people have said previously, it does not mean your frozen embryos will have the same issue, they are made from completely different eggs and sperm. If you want this testing done you will need to request it before the ERPC as they don't normally preform it until you have 3 miscarriages and it can only be done when you have a ERPC as the tissue can be collected correctly.
Another thing I wanted to mention, I was scanned on a Tuesday(10.3 weeks) and my ERPC was not scheduled until the following Tuesday(11.3), I didn't have any bleeding until the morning of the ERPC and they said the baby had stopped growing at 7 weeks so that was nearly 4 weeks of nothing, so it's completely normal for this to happen.
I had no pain after the D&C, had some bleeding on the day but after that it was only spotting for two weeks.
Look after yourself and take as much time as you need to recover emotionally and physically. Your lucky to have so many frozen embies to go back too.. this is just one of these things your next transfer will be a breeze and you'll get your bring home baby xxx

Denise2007

brokensoul wrote: »

Yeah, I have faith in him, despite him telling me after my myeomectomy that he thought I wouldn't need any more fertility treatment - some prediction that turned out to be!

Had confirmation scan and blood this morning. They talked through what to expect from the D&C and also what my options are from here. They recommend waiting one cycle after my next period and then transferring one of my frozen embryos. They said that (odd as it may sound) they would consider it a positive thing that I got pregnant, even if I miscarried as it shows that I can get pregnant. Guess I had not thought of it that way, but it did give me some comfort.

That's very true, it is positive that you can get pregnant. My consultant at Sims also told me that you're more fertile the months after a miscarriage. So fingers crossed for the future x