No Sleep and No Coffee Makes Parents Something Something

loubian

wolfpawnat wrote: »

Just been at the MIL's for a week. She spoilt the 4yo rotten meaning he is acting like a diva, and she told him to keep his sister awake because she is bold for taking attention off him. Seriously was glad to end up back in my shítty little apartment. Seriously have no idea why we put up with her some days!

Fair play for putting up with her for a week though!

wolfpawnat

loubian wrote: »

Fair play for putting up with her for a week though!

No joke, found a grey hair this week, I blame her!

nikpmup

yellow hen wrote: »

Honestly I cried every day for a fortnight too... Sometimes several times a day. My poor OH was so worried about me. In hindsight I think it was a combination of exhaustion, frustration at not being able to soothe my son, overwhelmed at the burden of responsibilty and also a body of raging hormones! It definitely got easier but I'd be lying if I said it was a dream. My son was refluxy and a difficult baby at times. The good times far outweigh the bad but I wish someone had prepared me better. I left work thinking I was going to have one long holiday.,. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Cry as you need to op, sleep as much as you can and talk to your OH. It will get better.

I could have written this, word for word!

icescreamqueen

lolademmers wrote: »

Ok so I'm waiting for this magical time to begin!! My beautiful son is 2 weeks old and I'm finding it so hard. I have no idea what I'm doing!! He cried for ages today and I couldnt soothe him. I love him so much and just want to do everything right. I know it's too soon to be in a routine and I'm clinging onto the hope that it will get better once that's established. I have a good cry at least once a day. My OH is so good but is back at work now. Terrified of getting PND.

One piece of advice, get someone you can trust to watch out for the signs of PND in you. I asked my sister to keep an eye on me. I was worried I was going to get it but thank God I'm ok. It helps to talk to someone who you can trust. Exhaustion can drive you demented!

January

wolfpawnat wrote: »

No joke, found a grey hair this week, I blame her!

I just wouldn't visit again. Send himself But that's just me... if my MIL got on my nerves like that (thankfully she doesn't) I'd just not visit, and she's only down the road.

wolfpawnat

And she seems shocked we are considering going abroad if there is no jobs when he finishes. I love his hometown, I just wish we didn't have to stay with her when we go there

Also had a neighbour with a promiscuous daughter with a child who has more potential fathers than an episode of Jeremy Kyle making comments about how Saoirse looks like neither of us when she is nearly the spit of her brother. Stupid crap, but still annoying.

January

wolfpawnat wrote: »

And she seems shocked we are considering going abroad if there is no jobs when he finishes. I love his hometown, I just wish we didn't have to stay with her when we go there

Also had a neighbour with a promiscuous daughter with a child who has more potential fathers than an episode of Jeremy Kyle making comments about how Saoirse looks like neither of us when she is nearly the spit of her brother. Stupid crap, but still annoying.

You're not allowed go abroad... I'm not letting you. And if you are you're taking us with you.

wolfpawnat

January wrote: »

You're not allowed go abroad... I'm not letting you. And if you are you're taking us with you.

Small animal practise up your side of the city

January

wolfpawnat wrote: »

Small animal practise up your side of the city

Eh hell yeah.

loubian

How can I go from feeling fine one minute to wanting to run away the next? Again, a's father is annoying me. I don't know how to switch off from him. I feel like I'm wasting time and missing enjoying A n then taking out my frustration in her all because of him. I'm just SO SO SO SO tired of his ****. My friend who has a similar problem mentioned she was getting a different number and giving it to her ex n using an old phone and giving it to her mum so she wouldn't have to deal with him. I'm going to do the same. At the moment I just feel like I'm not concentrating fully on her n I feel awful why is this happening to me? I've tried being nice with him, including him in the scans n trying to sort out access then he gives false addresses n makes everything complicated. I'm so frustrated and angry and tired and fed up and confused. And she's starting to teeth, is going crazy, is fighting sleep like a demon, has a cold and has a cranky mummy. God help her. But then when I think of handing her over to someone else, I feel guilty about leaving her n worried something will happen while I'm away. I've also got to start eating right n that's a BIG challenge for me. So sick n tired of feeling low and drained n complaining all the time. Gonna do what wolf did, go offline for a week. Give myself a break.

January

loubian you are dead right. Go off the radar for a bit. You don't need that kind of stress. Just concentrate on your little girl, she is all that matters.

Synyster Shadow

Went to a Halloween party Thursday night and was home by 11. Had the MIL mind DS she took him in her room all night and he was asleep in his travel cot when we got home. First great nights sleep he had for ages as he had a good feed before bed and only wanted bottle at 5 and back to bed for few hours. Well when I say bed I mean MIL's bed. She took him into her bed at 5. I said this to DH he is not impressed and last night I was up and down all night with DS so to say the least I'm not impressed. She doesn't care that we will have to deal with the back lash. And been 4 months pregnant I don't need baby in the bed kicking all night

wolfpawnat

Know the feeling SS. I went into a bedroom upstairs in MIL's house. 4yo in room downstairs, MIL offered to stay on couch next to bedroom for 1 night. She let him up at 5:30. So the next few mornings he got up at that time and he yelled at me to get up, waking S in the process. It makes life hard for no reason. I get that grannies get to spoil them, but sometimes it feels like they go out of their way to make life harder for us.

Synyster Shadow

Yeah it really seems that way! I used to mind loads of kids from babies to toddlers and never took them into the bed with me. It's not for me to do!

And at 7 months he's gettin very clever he's picking up on everything and really into everything too so he's picking up on the bed deal at one stage last night he didn't want the cot and he loves it. I just put him up at night and he goes to sleep no fuss or chatting even

icescreamqueen

I had a really teary day today. I feel like I should put my daughter up for adoption as I'm not a good mother 8-(. I'm trying my best but I'm finding it hard going. I had to change her 4 times today as the bottles are going straight through her and the poop is leaking out of her nappy nearly every time she has a bottle. It's going right up her back and soiling her clothes. I had to run her a bath first thing this morning

I feel like I'm still young and I'm seeing all my friends going out having a great social life and I'm home with the baby. I love my baby so much but I do miss my freedom too. My sister said she thinks I'm getting a touch of the baby blues. What do you get the best sister in the world?? I'd be lost without her.

January

icescreamqueen my second daughter needed regular changes throughout the day, I think I remember counting 8 as the record.

It gets easier.

loubian

icescreamqueen wrote: »

I had a really teary day today. I feel like I should put my daughter up for adoption as I'm not a good mother 8-(. I'm trying my best but I'm finding it hard going. I had to change her 4 times today as the bottles are going straight through her and the poop is leaking out of her nappy nearly every time she has a bottle. It's going right up her back and soiling her clothes. I had to run her a bath first thing this morning

I feel like I'm still young and I'm seeing all my friends going out having a great social life and I'm home with the baby. I love my baby so much but I do miss my freedom too. My sister said she thinks I'm getting a touch of the baby blues. What do you get the best sister in the world?? I'd be lost without her.

I know how this feels, but believe me you are doing a great job you have successfully brought your daughter into her third month of living, that is a huge achievement. It's hard to think straight when you're tired and frustrated but it will get better.

If you feel the bottles are going straight through her, maybe ring your phn for advise. Are you giving her bottles of breast milk or formula if you don't mind me asking?

Saw my friends newborn today and a is so big beside her and I'm feeling like a proud mammy because I got her there.

As you know from my other posts here, I find it very tough also and I reckon you really have to seize those good moments because they make you forget about the bad ones.

You're doing great!

Digs

icescreamqueen wrote: »

I had a really teary day today. I feel like I should put my daughter up for adoption as I'm not a good mother 8-(. I'm trying my best but I'm finding it hard going. I had to change her 4 times today as the bottles are going straight through her and the poop is leaking out of her nappy nearly every time she has a bottle. It's going right up her back and soiling her clothes. I had to run her a bath first thing this morning

I feel like I'm still young and I'm seeing all my friends going out having a great social life and I'm home with the baby. I love my baby so much but I do miss my freedom too. My sister said she thinks I'm getting a touch of the baby blues. What do you get the best sister in the world?? I'd be lost without her.

Ah pet there's no better place for your baby to be than with her mammy. It's the toughest job in the world, nothing can prepare you for it but take every day as it comes and you will get through it.

I literally sailed through the first few months and then bam, around the three month mark it all turned on it's head and there were many days I felt like you do, I think we've all felt like that at some stage. M daughter in the first few weeks had a dirty nappy after every single feed, it was insane. Since she's started solids the nappies have been just delightful too

Use your sister as a support, I feel the same way about my Mum, would just have been lost without her. My parents and sisters were over for dinner tonight and my LO was in such good form entertaining everyone, and seeing how mad they are about her and how much joy she brings it makes the tough times just fade into the background. For every how many hard days you have behind you there are much sunnier ones to come, don't worry

Rachineire

I think the third month was one of the toughest for me...the stream of visitors stops, baby stops sleeping as much and the last of your energy resources are drained from the constant lack of sleep. Its tough but it gets better. And im right there with you january I had 9 big gross dirty nappies one day and 3 of those were poo explosions. ..he was in and out of the bath a lot that day haha! Your doing a great job and being a great mom for you daughter!

wolfpawnat

icescreamqueen wrote: »

I had a really teary day today. I feel like I should put my daughter up for adoption as I'm not a good mother 8-(. I'm trying my best but I'm finding it hard going. I had to change her 4 times today as the bottles are going straight through her and the poop is leaking out of her nappy nearly every time she has a bottle. It's going right up her back and soiling her clothes. I had to run her a bath first thing this morning

I feel like I'm still young and I'm seeing all my friends going out having a great social life and I'm home with the baby. I love my baby so much but I do miss my freedom too. My sister said she thinks I'm getting a touch of the baby blues. What do you get the best sister in the world?? I'd be lost without her.

Icecreamqueen, sending you huge hugs. It is not easy, anyone who says it is either has no kids or is lying through their teeth. I have had to soak clothes several times in one night due to leaky poops, and I can't even say it's because I am a first time mom.

Regarding the young mum thing. It was 9 days after my 22nd birthday when no1 was born, nothing makes life more restricting than having a baby, and there are days I feel so annoyed I cannot just have lunch/dinner with friends, or even spend money on me because they need something else. It is never ending. I was excited about no1 going to preschool and then into primary, it meant I could do things, then I got pregnant and it is daunting knowing I will not get free time to myself until she is at least 3. Would I change her for the world, hell no. Do I get upset sometimes, definitely. I hate the attitude I have sometimes gotten of "You chose to keep them". People choose a lot of things, it doesn't mean you are not allowed complain about the negative or the shítty things.

Huge hugs and know you are not alone.

wolfpawnat

On a different note. One of the streams of abuse I got all week from the MIL was regarding A's somewhat strict bedtime. He is always in be between 7:30 and 8. Apparently if they have a bedtime it turns them...................GAY!!!!! Be warned ladies:rolleyes:

vitani

wolfpawnat wrote: »

On a different note. One of the streams of abuse I got all week from the MIL was regarding A's somewhat strict bedtime. He is always in be between 7:30 and 8. Apparently if they have a bedtime it turns them...................GAY!!!!! Be warned ladies:rolleyes:

Hmm... so am I making my daughter straighter or a lesbian? Either's fine with me, just want to be prepared.

Oh... and did she even attempt to explain the logic behind that one? It's beyond me.

lmullen

wolfpawnat wrote: »

On a different note. One of the streams of abuse I got all week from the MIL was regarding A's somewhat strict bedtime. He is always in be between 7:30 and 8. Apparently if they have a bedtime it turns them...................GAY!!!!! Be warned ladies:rolleyes:

Oh dear Lord what next for the MILs to come out with! Bedtime routines are so important! When mine or DPs mother is minding A that is the one thing we really insist on being done our way!

wolfpawnat

vitani wrote: »

Hmm... so am I making my daughter straighter or a lesbian? Either's fine with me, just want to be prepared.

Oh... and did she even attempt to explain the logic behind that one? It's beyond me.

This is my MIL we are talking about, her logic is illogical.

It made me laugh no end, I actually spilled the sugar I was holding when she said it. One of her friends has a gay nephew and the mother of the man states it is because she and his father were too strict on him.

wolfpawnat

lmullen wrote: »

Oh dear Lord what next for the MILs to come out with! Bedtime routines are so important! When mine or DPs mother is minding A that is the one thing we really insist on being done our way!

She is the one that helped us establish a bedtime with him when he was 12 weeks old. She just wants to go the opposite on everything with me. I take no notice, but that comment was a particularly hilarious one.

Moonbeam

your mother in law is pure crazy!!

You should start a blog "Things my mother in law has said"

icescreamqueen

wolfpawnat wrote: »

On a different note. One of the streams of abuse I got all week from the MIL was regarding A's somewhat strict bedtime. He is always in be between 7:30 and 8. Apparently if they have a bedtime it turns them...................GAY!!!!! Be warned ladies:rolleyes:

Serious LOL. This cracked me up! Cheers for the chuckles. I think I would probably start being bad and start to entertain her, just so I would get a few giggles like that!

wolfpawnat

Moonbeam wrote: »

your mother in law is pure crazy!!

You should start a blog "Things my mother in law has said"

No one would believe me. Seriously I don't think people actually believe me when I repeat what she says and I cannot blame them!

Moonbeam

icescreamqueen wrote: »

I had a really teary day today. I feel like I should put my daughter up for adoption as I'm not a good mother 8-(. I'm trying my best but I'm finding it hard going. I had to change her 4 times today as the bottles are going straight through her and the poop is leaking out of her nappy nearly every time she has a bottle. It's going right up her back and soiling her clothes. I had to run her a bath first thing this morning

I feel like I'm still young and I'm seeing all my friends going out having a great social life and I'm home with the baby. I love my baby so much but I do miss my freedom too. My sister said she thinks I'm getting a touch of the baby blues. What do you get the best sister in the world?? I'd be lost without her.

*hugs* the 1st few months are so hard.
The tiredness,the lack of food,the lack of normality everything gets in the way but it only lasts a short time.
I find the parenting side fine but my house is a permanent mess,I did 5 washes today and still have more to finish tomorrow I am a complete failure at this house keeping business.
At the end of the day you and her are all that matter and a baby does not mean your social life is over completely.
How young are you? Talk to the phn or gp about baby blues and get help now rather then later.

wolfpawnat

Moonbeam wrote: »

I find the parenting side fine but my house is a permanent mess,I did 5 washes today and still have more to finish tomorrow I am a complete failure at this house keeping business.

I have 2 clothes racks and all radiators covered in washed clothes and I have an ensuite shower up to my hip filled with the next few lots. It is taking forever for clothes to dry, meaning by the time one lot dries, I need to wash important stuff again so loads of other clothes are left waiting once more, 4 people, and 3 days to dry some clothes is not a good mix!