No Sleep and No Coffee Makes Parents Something Something

Rachineire

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I have 2 clothes racks and all radiators covered in washed clothes and I have an ensuite shower up to my hip filled with the next few lots. It is taking forever for clothes to dry, meaning by the time one lot dries, I need to wash important stuff again so loads of other clothes are left waiting once more, 4 people, and 3 days to dry some clothes is not a good mix!

This may be the American in me but I REFUSED to have this child unless we had a dryer in the house. And not that washer dryer combo...a proper dryer. Yes my electricity bills are higher but for me its worth it. I don't think my sanity could have withstood a baby and air drying clothes

wolfpawnat

Rachineire wrote: »

This may be the American in me but I REFUSED to have this child unless we had a dryer in the house. And not that washer dryer combo...a proper dryer. Yes my electricity bills are higher but for me its worth it. I don't think my sanity could have withstood a baby and air drying clothes

I don't have that luxury in my shítty rented apartment. I have a combo, but it makes they clothes smell funny if you use the drier part, but I use it to wash and dry the kids blankets and my son's jacket because they need them asap. I can't wait to be able to be properly sorted in a year or so! Even a washing line would mean a lot to me at this stage.

iguana

wolfpawnat wrote: »

On a different note. One of the streams of abuse I got all week from the MIL was regarding A's somewhat strict bedtime. He is always in be between 7:30 and 8. Apparently if they have a bedtime it turns them...................GAY!!!!! Be warned ladies:rolleyes:

S has a very flexible bedtime so, WOOHOO! I'm going to be a grandma what with all the hetero sex his future self will be enjoying.

Can't wait to be a MIL, I'm going to start inventing some crazy sh!t to tell my DIL.:D

yellow hen

I just had several pages of reading to catch up on there as we have a sick little man the minute! Wolfpawnat, your MIL sounds like a scream... I for one would find your blog hilarious

Icecreamqueen, we've all had the moments you're talking about. Parenting us the most difficult thing ice ever done and some days I feel like a failure too. Other days are better. Do talk to your doctor just do they're aware how you're feeling and will advise you in the event you are getting a touch of the blues.

In relation to our little man, he has ANOTHER head cold at the minute. He's just started crèche so I think he picked it up there. This time however, he isn't sleeping more than 20 minutes at one time at night. We've put him in our bed propped on a pillow and that seems to help but he keeps trying to roll onto his tummy and between the stuffed nose and having his dodie in, he can't breathe. We've given him snuffkebaby, calpol and tixylix for his cough. Any other suggestions? I've had 3 hours sleep all night and I'm totally exhausted

Gee_G

yellow hen wrote: »

I just had several pages of reading to catch up on there as we have a sick little man the minute! Wolfpawnat, your MIL sounds like a scream... I for one would find your blog hilarious

Icecreamqueen, we've all had the moments you're talking about. Parenting us the most difficult thing ice ever done and some days I feel like a failure too. Other days are better. Do talk to your doctor just do they're aware how you're feeling and will advise you in the event you are getting a touch of the blues.

In relation to our little man, he has ANOTHER head cold at the minute. He's just started crèche so I think he picked it up there. This time however, he isn't sleeping more than 20 minutes at one time at night. We've put him in our bed propped on a pillow and that seems to help but he keeps trying to roll onto his tummy and between the stuffed nose and having his dodie in, he can't breathe. We've given him snuffkebaby, calpol and tixylix for his cough. Any other suggestions? I've had 3 hours sleep all night and I'm totally exhausted

I find the snufflebabe on their feet brilliant. If you can get karvol or olbus(sp?) Oil and put it on tissues around the place or into a bowl of boiling water in the room you are in. Also, I put Vicks or snuffle babe on a wet facecloth and out it on the radiator in the room when heating is on.

How Strange

Oh yellow hen I sympathise with you. a has had one head cold after another since 6 weeks. I'm so fed up of it.

I find the olbas oil for children very good. I burn some in the bedroom for a couple of hours before bedtime. I cut a bit of muslin cloth and put a generous amount of olbas oil on it and put it beside her nose. It does help clear it during the night. Then I slather snuffle balm all over the sheets.

During the day I squirt some saline spray or nasosal up her nose and suck out the snot with one of those bulb things. Do it before he eats as it can trigger the gag reflex.

Then I sometimes steam up the bathroom and out her in there in her high chair and burn some olbas oil at the same time.

And still we have sleepless nights!! Sometimes if she's really congested I put her beside me with her head tucked under my arm and on the pillow and she can fall asleep like that. Not exactly safe but what can you do! It means I sleep with one eye open but at least i can doze off.

Lola92

wolfpawnat wrote: »

On a different note. One of the streams of abuse I got all week from the MIL was regarding A's somewhat strict bedtime. He is always in be between 7:30 and 8. Apparently if they have a bedtime it turns them...................GAY!!!!! Be warned ladies:rolleyes:

Jesus WPN, that woman is some dose! Is that the same one that gave S the formula?

My moan of the day - I literally cannot keep clothes on E. Apparently running around the place naked is the best thing ever. I'm afraid she's going to catch a cold so have to keep the heating on now during the day too. If I manage to get another change of clothes on her the bottoms will come off the next time she goes to the toilet and I'll be chasing her around the house again!! Grrr.

yellow hen

So he's gone to bed and wasn't in it 10 minutes and he was awake roaring I had olbas oil burning all eve in his room, have it on a bib tied to his cot, put snuffkebaby on feet and chest and gave him neurofen. And it didn't work. Praying it was a false start and he'll settle down. I don't mind the weekends so much but I find it exhausting during the week when I'm home on my home. I'm back to work in a fortnight too and am absolutely bricking how I'm going to cope!

How Strange

I'm back in a week and a half and I don't know how I'll cope with the exhaustion. At least now I can get a bit of a nap most days if we've had a bad night.

yellow hen

How Strange wrote: »

I'm back in a week and a half and I don't know how I'll cope with the exhaustion. At least now I can get a bit of a nap most days if we've had a bad night.

Oh you're back too! Is your little girl going to crèche? I've been putting O in for a few hours a week and he's already for a diarrhoea type bug and a headcold. I am just dreading the whole thing and the next few weeks will be ruined with worry and anxiety

How Strange

She's starting her settling in tomorrow. I'm really hoping she doesn't pick up lots of bugs. The head colds are bad enough.

sleepytrees

icescreamqueen wrote: »

I had a really teary day today. I feel like I should put my daughter up for adoption as I'm not a good mother 8-(. I'm trying my best but I'm finding it hard going. I had to change her 4 times today as the bottles are going straight through her and the poop is leaking out of her nappy nearly every time she has a bottle. It's going right up her back and soiling her clothes. I had to run her a bath first thing this morning

I feel like I'm still young and I'm seeing all my friends going out having a great social life and I'm home with the baby. I love my baby so much but I do miss my freedom too. My sister said she thinks I'm getting a touch of the baby blues. What do you get the best sister in the world?? I'd be lost without her.[/QUOT

You are a good mother and don't let over tiredness and emotions let you doubt that. It's so hard the first year!! My little man had poo nappies like that all the time at the beginning till about 6 months! I had to cut off babygros because he had poo'd up too his neck!! It was just easier to give him baths after those poo nappies. It was exhausting but now he has solid adult poops and I'm delighted

Can you get a baby sitter for even an hour or two and meet a friend of your sister for a coffee? Just to take so time off. Go to the doc and tell her you are feeling a bit overwhelmed. If you do have baby blues it's best to talk about it. It's nothing to be ashamed off and it doesn't mean you aren't a good mother.

My son celebrated his first birthday today :D and it was wonderful. I can't believe how easy it is now compared to the first 6 months. It does get easier!!

sleepytrees

My son celebrated his first birthday! It's getting so much easier now but I'm sitting here feeling guilty I didn't give him a birthday cake!! My husband and I decided we would next year but we just felt he was too young! He got frozen yogurt though. He had a great day. Wonder what 1-2yrs challenges are ahead

January

sleepytrees wrote: »

My son celebrated his first birthday! It's getting so much easier now but I'm sitting here feeling guilty I didn't give him a birthday cake!! My husband and I decided we would next year but we just felt he was too young! He got frozen yogurt though. He had a great day. Wonder what 1-2yrs challenges are ahead

Stop, they don't even realise they don't have a cake at their first birthday!

You and your husband are doing a wonderful job, I should know He's such a happy and content baby!

sleepytrees

January wrote: »

Stop, they don't even realise they don't have a cake at their first birthday!

You and your husband are doing a wonderful job, I should know He's such a happy and content baby!

Aww thanks January. Coming from someone who I know is a GREAT mother it's nice to hear

Rachineire

Im so stressed, my baby is up screaming again there is nothing that settles him besides rocking him for ages in his pram. This is bringing back so much anxiety from the early days and every night I feel like I did when my pnd was bad and I want to run away because I feel like this isn't going to end.

nikpmup

In tears for much of today and tonight. Poor H doesn't deserve a mother who gives out to him for crying

loubian

There must he something in the air, she has woken up for seemingly a bottle but took less than 100mls n doesn't want any more. It's hard to get her to take a decent amount of the bottle any more. Should I bring her to the docs tomorrow? She sounded chesty or wheezy the other night, n I felt like horse poop because I hadn't noticed soonee n brought her to the doc. I now was trying to put soothing gel on her gums n I nicked the bottom gum with my nail n made everything worse. She's now asleep in my arms n I dunno whether to wake her to try continue with the bottle or to let her sleep. Feel like crying every time I think about the time n the frequency of her feeding. .

How Strange

We seem to have well and truly broken our baby. She woke st 2am for a feed but was wide awake and full of chat. My husband took her up to the living room to tire her out but had to go back to bed after an hour. So now I'm up as she was screaming in the cot.

What am I going to do with her? I'm back to work in a week and a half.

She's the most incredibly cute and gorgeous baby during the day but she's terrorising us at night.

Believe me I wouldn't be sitting up at 3.45am if I didn't have to. Luckily our first born would sleep through an earthquake because this lady is loud.

yellow hen

It looks like we've all had a terrible night I can function on 4-5 hours sleep during the day when I'm off but how on earth am I meant to do a job in a few weeks??? Little man is back in bed now and I'm plonked on couch in pjs, with hair sticking out in every direction, living room is like a bomb hit it but I don't care... I've got an hour of peace!

wolfpawnat

nikpmup wrote: »

In tears for much of today and tonight. Poor H doesn't deserve a mother who gives out to him for crying

Mammies are allowed to lose the plot. We all get angry, we all snap, that is normal. Bottling it in is dangerous for your well being, letting it out is important. Huge hugs

January

My 2 year old woke at 4.30... and then woke the older two at 5.30...

nikpmup

wolfpawnat wrote: »

Mammies are allowed to lose the plot. We all get angry, we all snap, that is normal. Bottling it in is dangerous for your well being, letting it out is important. Huge hugs

I'm feeling calmer today, but yesterday I really felt like just leaving. It was scary. Himself went to meet a friend for a few hours, in the time he was gone (5pm-10pm) H never stopped crying, he pooped his way through 3 sets of clothes, he projectile vomited all over his swing chair, he cried constantly - didn't want to be on my chest, didn't want to be lying down. I needed to express; I'm not pumping enough to keep my supply up and I'm afraid I'm gonna lose my milk but I just couldn't yesterday. I'm pumping now and I'm only managing to squeeze 2oz out of each side - I used to be able to get at least double that.
I was so frustrated yesterday that I found myself standing over this angry, crying little ball, not quite shouting but very loudly asking him, "what the hell do you want??!!" That's not fair. Of course, he calmed down as soon as his dad came home.
I'm really afraid at times like that that I've failed to bond with him properly. I don't know if it's because of the baby blues or his birth or if it's just one of those things, but I do think at times that I don't have the strong maternal urge I'm supposed to have. I hate myself for even articulating that. I spent 10+ years trying to conceive, now he's here and it's not like I thought it would be

loubian

nikpmup wrote: »

I'm feeling calmer today, but yesterday I really felt like just leaving. It was scary. Himself went to meet a friend for a few hours, in the time he was gone (5pm-10pm) H never stopped crying, he pooped his way through 3 sets of clothes, he projectile vomited all over his swing chair, he cried constantly - didn't want to be on my chest, didn't want to be lying down. I needed to express; I'm not pumping enough to keep my supply up and I'm afraid I'm gonna lose my milk but I just couldn't yesterday. I'm pumping now and I'm only managing to squeeze 2oz out of each side - I used to be able to get at least double that.

Would you consider taking those herbs that are meant to help your supply?

wolfpawnat

nikpmup wrote: »

I'm feeling calmer today, but yesterday I really felt like just leaving. It was scary. Himself went to meet a friend for a few hours, in the time he was gone (5pm-10pm) H never stopped crying, he pooped his way through 3 sets of clothes, he projectile vomited all over his swing chair, he cried constantly - didn't want to be on my chest, didn't want to be lying down. I needed to express; I'm not pumping enough to keep my supply up and I'm afraid I'm gonna lose my milk but I just couldn't yesterday. I'm pumping now and I'm only managing to squeeze 2oz out of each side - I used to be able to get at least double that.
I was so frustrated yesterday that I found myself standing over this angry, crying little ball, not quite shouting but very loudly asking him, "what the hell do you want??!!" That's not fair. Of course, he calmed down as soon as his dad came home.
I'm really afraid at times like that that I've failed to bond with him properly. I don't know if it's because of the baby blues or his birth or if it's just one of those things, but I do think at times that I don't have the strong maternal urge I'm supposed to have. I hate myself for even articulating that. I spent 10+ years trying to conceive, now he's here and it's not like I thought it would be

No one actually realises what babies are like til they are here, and every child is so different from the next. You are doing great. The strong urge isn't instant for so many, I didn't bond with no1 for a few months. It can take a while.

As for the milk, when stressed or tired, I find I have less too.

loubian wrote: »

Would you consider taking those herbs that are meant to help your supply?

Fenugreek, they are good for supply. Also good (recommended for mums with babies in NICU to help milk supply) is Motilium. I use it, it is great. If you have doubts though, go to your GP.

vitani

nikpmup wrote: »

I'm really afraid at times like that that I've failed to bond with him properly. I don't know if it's because of the baby blues or his birth or if it's just one of those things, but I do think at times that I don't have the strong maternal urge I'm supposed to have. I hate myself for even articulating that. I spent 10+ years trying to conceive, now he's here and it's not like I thought it would be

That 'instant bonding' thing we're all supposed to feel? It's a myth!

Some women are lucky enough to bond with their babies the second they lay eyes on them but a lot of us don't. It took me months to bond with my daughter and I felt exactly the same as you do. Bonding for us was a very slow process but we got there in the end.

For me, I spent the first five weeks exhausting myself because I was trying to express milk as well as take care of her single-handedly. I felt guilty switching to formula but once I did, a lot of pressure came off my shoulders and that's when the bonding really began. I'm not advising you to quit breastfeeding, because it is a wonderful thing to do - but I just wanted to put it out there that if it's stressing you out trying to express and keep everything going, then the benefits of the milk might be cancelled out for both of you.

MurdyWurdy

Terrible night here too - and I know a few others mammies who had the same. Is there something in the air? The cold? J is not a big crier but was up loads last night crying as if I was torturing him

nikpmup

I think I just need to spend a day or two pumping every 2 hours to stimulate my supply, but I will look into those herbs. It's funny, we're giving him formula at night, so we're not using up the milk at the rate we were, if you looked in the fridge you'd think I was a milk machine, there's about ten bags of milk there! Most if them only contain 2/3oz though, so we have to give him 2 bags each feed.

wolfpawnat

Saves on waste having only 2/3 per bag. If there is a Lloyds pharmacy near you, they have Nuk BM fridge containers that double up as bottles 3 for 5e! I only use bags for freezing since they cost a lot.

I feel bad, S slept from 8 to 5 last night, but is in a bit of a mood today

MurdyWurdy

nikpmup wrote: »

I'm feeling calmer today, but yesterday I really felt like just leaving. It was scary. Himself went to meet a friend for a few hours, in the time he was gone (5pm-10pm) H never stopped crying, he pooped his way through 3 sets of clothes, he projectile vomited all over his swing chair, he cried constantly - didn't want to be on my chest, didn't want to be lying down. I needed to express; I'm not pumping enough to keep my supply up and I'm afraid I'm gonna lose my milk but I just couldn't yesterday. I'm pumping now and I'm only managing to squeeze 2oz out of each side - I used to be able to get at least double that.
I was so frustrated yesterday that I found myself standing over this angry, crying little ball, not quite shouting but very loudly asking him, "what the hell do you want??!!" That's not fair. Of course, he calmed down as soon as his dad came home.
I'm really afraid at times like that that I've failed to bond with him properly. I don't know if it's because of the baby blues or his birth or if it's just one of those things, but I do think at times that I don't have the strong maternal urge I'm supposed to have. I hate myself for even articulating that. I spent 10+ years trying to conceive, now he's here and it's not like I thought it would be

The beginning is so so hard but I promise you it gets easier. I hated being told that but it!'s true. Once we got to 12 weeks J was in a proper routine and we felt so much better. Tiredness is a killer too - it makes everything else look worse. You're doing a great job and it's normal to be overwhelmed - it's hard!

At the beginning they're just blobs, they cry, poop and puke and you get nothing back from them and it is hard. When they start smiling and know who you are it's much easier to feel a bond. J is 4.5 months and it's a really lovely age he's not a big crier but I've asked him what the hell he wants on more than one occasion. We're only human after all - don't be to hard on yourself!