No Sleep and No Coffee Makes Parents Something Something

How Strange

As you can see this sleep deprived mother of a 5 month old is sitting up with a wide awake baba.

How am I going to cope being back at work in 4 weeks!

Blueskye

How Strange wrote: »

As you can see this sleep deprived mother of a 5 month old is sitting up with a wide awake baba.

How am I going to cope being back at work in 4 weeks!

Must be a 5 month thing. Two wide awake babas here since 4am. Have given up trying to get them back to sleep.

How Strange

Blueskye the only thing worse than a wide awake baba at 4 am is 2 of them!

Mink

January wrote: »

but I felt guilty last night for being mad at my 2 year old for waking up at 3am and then extra guilty when she woke up this morning with a temp! She's teething the poor thing.

Eh... hang on... I thought babies were supposed to get all their teeth by two... and teething ends. Do they get more after 2? Oh crap!

Blueskye wrote: »

No sleep and 5 month old twins means mammy went out today and left front door wide open...until OH got home 2 hours later!! He thought we had been robbed. I can't believe we weren't robbed!!!! I love my babies but What I wouldn't do for a full nights sleep...

I often returned from walks to find my keys still in the front door, or my husband would come home and door open etc.
Don't get me started on putting phone in fridge & milk in the washing machine etc

pwurple

Mink wrote: »

Eh... hang on... I thought babies were supposed to get all their teeth by two... and teething ends. Do they get more after 2? Oh crap!

You only know it's over when you count them all up. My daughter had hers by 18 months I think, but getting them earlier wasn't fun either. Especially when your first experience of breastfeeding is a toothy newborn trying to sooth their sore gums on you. Ouch. It sucks how ever long it goes on.

I am wondering how they always manage to want to sleep in past 8am on weekdays, ("It's nighttime, go away mammy") and then are up at 6am on the weekends.

Synyster Shadow

Don't want to alarm anyone with 2-3 month babies but some go through sleep regression at 4-5 months and it can drag on its easily the worst part and I was convinced something was wrong with J but nope it's normal

So at 5 months been awake all night I can fully sympathize. And having two I can totally feel sorry for you. But 6 months seems to be ok. Minus the 6 month jab

Hannibal Smith

Mink wrote: »

Eh... hang on... I thought babies were supposed to get all their teeth by two... and teething ends. Do they get more after 2? Oh crap!



I often returned from walks to find my keys still in the front door, or my husband would come home and door open etc.
Don't get me started on putting phone in fridge & milk in the washing machine etc

Yeah but by that stage they will be able to tell you and you wont be in a panic trying to figure out what's going on before realising its tooth related.

wmpdd3

esp when the c-section doctor told me to "lift the flap" to let air at my wound to let it heal!

^^^I nearly choked on my dinner.

I probably would have cried if a doc said that to me in the early days.

If my other half found about about all the daft things I have done since I had kids, he'd have me committed.

Worst was driving straight through the barrier at the car park without even taking my ticket out of my wallet. Baby was crying in the back and my boobs were going to explode if I didn't get home, my car just bounced off it thankfully.

Worst bit was it was the car park that I used to park when I worked full time so all the staff recognised the car. Haven't been back.

January

Mink wrote: »

Eh... hang on... I thought babies were supposed to get all their teeth by two... and teething ends. Do they get more after 2? Oh crap!



I often returned from walks to find my keys still in the front door, or my husband would come home and door open etc.
Don't get me started on putting phone in fridge & milk in the washing machine etc

My nearly 4 year old got her last tooth back in May and the youngest didn't get her first tooth until she was nearly 15 months old... she only has about 8/10, can't get a proper count as she won't let me near her mouth.

Suucee

The worst thing i done sleep deprived was left the front door swinging wide open while i brought LO up for a nap. I then decided to go in for a lie down myself.
Went down stairs after about 2 hours to find it open. OH was in work but i still started calling his name etc.
So lucky we werent burgled or worse considering we were in the house asleep.
Have lost count of the amount of times ive left it unlocked.

SnoozySuzie

Went to view a venue for our wedding today and while talking to the wedding coordinator L does the biggest noisiest poo ever. It silenced the 3 of us the wedding coordinator didn't know where to look. I brought her into the changing room and she was covered in it. Thank god I had a change of clothes with me. This is probably why your meant to get married before having babies :-)

loubian

Does anyone know what eye drops are good? My eyes get super itchy from the tiredness and it'd be nice to have some drops to relieve them!?

A wasn't as bad tonight as she was last night, she was gabbling away. Now to catch some sleep before another busy day

Mink

January wrote: »

My nearly 4 year old got her last tooth back in May and the youngest didn't get her first tooth until she was nearly 15 months old... she only has about 8/10, can't get a proper count as she won't let me near her mouth.

Wow babies are so different with their timing. My fella had his first at 5mths and now has 12 (14 mths). But it's been awful having him start teething so young and having the teeth come so close together, wish it was the other way.

Synyster Shadow wrote: »

Don't want to alarm anyone with 2-3 month babies but some go through sleep regression at 4-5 months and it can drag on its easily the worst part and I was convinced something was wrong with J but nope it's normal

So at 5 months been awake all night I can fully sympathize. And having two I can totally feel sorry for you. But 6 months seems to be ok. Minus the 6 month jab

Yes the 4-5 mth sleep regression freaked me out as there had previously been light at the end of the tunnel. But by the time you accept they'll never sleep, they start sleeping fine again!

loubian wrote: »

Does anyone know what eye drops are good? My eyes get super itchy from the tiredness and it'd be nice to have some drops to relieve them!?

Optrex eye drops are usually good.


I don't have anything to complain about right now... I'm in that lovely lull period where amazingly there is no teething, illness passed, sleep gone back to normal, wonder weeks over for the moment...

the calm before the storm, normally only get a week or two of this before whingey pants reappears! I can't wait til he can talk and tell me what he wants/doesn't want.

Rose35

Great thread, for expressing the things you really don't want to say because of 'mammy guilt', wow mink, my 14 month old only has 7 teeth, so I guess he will be teething for much longer, we are using the amber bracelet, so im thinking that is why he is having a relatively easy time so far.

banbhaaifric

wolfpawnat wrote: »

banbhaairfric, what ever you have to unload, this is the thread for it. we can't hold it in, it is unhealthy. Babies sense frustration and family don't want to hear moaning.

I feel you on the family thing, my partner thinks I don't find him attractive anymore and I feel the only time I am with my son is to get him to do stuff like get dressed for school and even half of that I feel like I am yelling!!!

Thanks Wolf. Am in a better place all round today . Just back from the 6 week check and she has put on two and a half pounds since she was born so I'm delighted. Think I'll start expressing soon so my OH can do a feed or two when he's home next week. And maybe if I get some rest I can pay him some attention

And today I managed not to be a total zombie sending my lovely teenager off to school. Yesterday she came in to say goodbye and found me with all lights on, 3 alarms going off and me spark out.

But the baby just has to whimper and I'm wide awake. Biology eh!

Neyite

Mine was teething from 2 months. Was about 5 months before a tooth appeared though. Last count @17mo he had 14. Has 4 back teeth, 6 top front and 4 bottom. How many do they get?

We have discovered tantrums this week. And since he has no words, its impossible to find out what he wants. I'm a tad frazzled this morning.

How Strange

Lucky you January!

I'm so exhausted right now I just feel like I'm sleepwalking during the day. We're going through a huge developmental leap and teething so there's even less sleep.

Babies certainly put a strain on relationships. I just feel like I'm the fool doing all the night stuff. I'm on maternity leave so technically I can have a rest the next day although it doesn't always work out like that but I've had 5.5 months of it now. I've really started to resent himself at around 2.30am when he tuts as he turns over.

Loubian I'm using artelac as I've been having problems with one eye being dry and itchy. It's very good.

I think they get 24 teeth in total. I just got his last 2 recently at 2.5.

iguana

My MIL is dying so we are spending a lot of time staying at my in laws house and it's taking it's toll on S. It's completely messed up his bodily functions pattern and he's taken to waking up in the early hours for a poo, then being really hard to settle back to sleep afterwards. It's really tough as on the one hand I want to be able to settle him back to his normal life and on the other I really don't want my MIL to die.:(

Thankfully other than the stupid poo timing and being off his food he's otherwise ok with the travelling and is happy to play with MIL as much as she's able to handle. I'd hate if he was to be cranky or make strange with her and spoil the time they have left.

How Strange

iguana that's really terrible.

Rose35

Neyite wrote: »

Mine was teething from 2 months. Was about 5 months before a tooth appeared though. Last count @17mo he had 14. Has 4 back teeth, 6 top front and 4 bottom. How many do they get?

We have discovered tantrums this week. And since he has no words, its impossible to find out what he wants. I'm a tad frazzled this morning.

The number of teeth in total is 20.(baby teeth)
My little man has 4 top and 3 bottom.
It's so hard to have a proper look around, just saw the recent one come up a few days ago. He is 14 months today:) Where is the time going!!!

loubian

Seriously cannot handle this. I'm going crazy. This is why you need to be married before having kids because the two of you are responsible. When the oh comes home you can get out into the world again. Didn't think I'd get ppd but dunno if it's coming on. My thoughts scare me. If I do, I will have failed. I hate this so much.

nikpmup

loubian wrote: »

Seriously cannot handle this. I'm going crazy. This is why you need to be married before having kids because the two of you are responsible. When the oh comes home you can get out into the world again. Didn't think I'd get ppd but dunno if it's coming on. My thoughts scare me. If I do, I will have failed. I hate this so much.

I think the baby blues is too cutesy a name for what happens to us; I haven't stopped crying for days. I've never felt so inadequate and scared. I sent you a pm x

Hannibal Smith

Speak to your gp ladies. It can be sorted and you can feel a whole lot better. Its not you thats responsible for your thoughts.

January

loubian wrote: »

Seriously cannot handle this. I'm going crazy. This is why you need to be married before having kids because the two of you are responsible. When the oh comes home you can get out into the world again. Didn't think I'd get ppd but dunno if it's coming on. My thoughts scare me. If I do, I will have failed. I hate this so much.

You will not have failed. Feeling this way is not your fault. Please speak to your GP or PHN they can help you feel better.

We're all here for you too.

nikpmup, that goes for you too.

We're not professionals, but we're all in this together, partners or no partners.

wolfpawnat

January is right, this is part of the reason I set up the thread, to talk through the shítty things, but if you are feeling so blue it is not helping, please seek someone professional. They are prepared to help any woman through this.

loubian wrote: »

Seriously cannot handle this. I'm going crazy. This is why you need to be married before having kids because the two of you are responsible. When the oh comes home you can get out into the world again. Didn't think I'd get ppd but dunno if it's coming on. My thoughts scare me. If I do, I will have failed. I hate this so much.

Loubian, huge hugs, but having the other parent in the picture does not always mean they are much help either trust me. My OH came home, had a cup of tea, had a shower ate dinner and is now asleep in bed. He has never changed a nappy or done a fed with S, nor has he done a single night. It helps, I won't deny it, though I have never had the luxury of him coming in the door and just handing him the kids.You are so strong for everything you have done for A. Through your pregnancy and now, you are a great mom, everything you have done you have done for her! PND happens and that is nothing to be ashamed of. Even those without it feel themselves losing the cool too. I have been close to snapping a few times, sometimes the voice of reason in my head is drowned out by the screaming baby. Go to your doctor if you feel like you cannot cope and remember, the only way to fail at parenting is to not think of yourself and your child, which you do on a daily basis

nikpmup wrote: »

I think the baby blues is too cutesy a name for what happens to us; I haven't stopped crying for days. I've never felt so inadequate and scared. I sent you a pm x

I think they call it that to not scare mothers to be.


I haven't cried for ages and I think that is the problem, I have always had a bad temper but I keep it well under the wraps, but every day I am bottling in more and more anger and frustration and it worries me how bad it will be when I finally have too much. I had to walk an hour round trip today to my son's school in the torrential rain, I also had to go to Tesco, another 20 min each way walk. Went back to the school at home time and he had wet himself in school, and the baby cried every time I put her down AGAIN!!! All I want is a sort of tidy house. Not clean, I know that's not a possibility, just a few dishes and clothes washed and a quick hoover.

OH comes home and gives out about his shíte day and says he rather be at home with the kids because you do nothing!!! Seriously píssed off, I hate how being a home parent is totally taken for granted. When he walked out the door of the practice today he was finished, won't have to worry about it again until tomorrow. No home parent has that luxury.

How Strange

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I haven't cried for ages and I think that is the problem, I have always had a bad temper but I keep it well under the wraps, but every day I am bottling in more and more anger and frustration and it worries me how bad it will be when I finally have too much..

This is exactly how I feel too. I'm so angry at my husband at the moment as I feel he just isn't doing his share. He'd deny it but I feel the burden falls on me and it makes me so resentful.

I really hope it passes. I definitely do not want to be like this.

wolfpawnat

How Strange wrote: »

This is exactly how I feel too. I'm so angry at my husband at the moment as I feel he just isn't doing his share. He'd deny it but I feel the burden falls on me and it makes me so resentful.

I really hope it passes. I definitely do not want to be like this.

Every week, he needs something else, haircut, boots, runners, college stuff, normal necessary things, and I am going around in jeans that make me look like an extra in Brokeback Mountain, hair that according to my 4 year old makes me look like I am in One Direction. Going 3 days without a shower because I haven't time, shoes that are worn and cutting my ankles, I just can't take it anymore. I feel that in the house the 2 kids come first (as they should), then bills, himself and way at the bottom, me. It just really gets on my wick. Then being told staying at home is easy, and that the house should be cleaner. I cannot pee without the baby screaming her head off!!!

Sorry for the rant, as I said, a lot of anger and frustration that just will not come out as tears. Sometimes crying is a lot healthier.

Das Kitty

Hannibal Smith wrote: »

Speak to your gp ladies. It can be sorted and you can feel a whole lot better. Its not you thats responsible for your thoughts.

This x 1000000

I went through hell with my first, and mostly it was this fear of failure. I was afraid to admit I wasn't coping. Why exactly is now a mystery to me.

I ended up contemplating suicide before I was willing to go for help. I was feeling back to my old self very quickly once I went to my GP and made a plan to get better. I kept with my therapist and ended up feeling better than I had in my whole life.

It's an illness. Think of it like an infection. You wouldn't leave an infection untreated, it would end up getting worse. This is the same.

There is no shame in it at all. Happy mum = happy baby.

Brown boot

D is five months & our first baby so everything is quite new. I'm used to being around babies & children but nothing prepared me for this.
Most of the time I feel like I'm doing ok but then a bout of wind will have d screaming, or d will be constipated, or tired, or teething. I found the summer very difficult because it was way too hot for a newborn & d had colic. Stifling heat & a baby who would not be left down for two minutes without screeching tested my patience.
Now d is teething & is fussy with her bottles. She seems to be back on the amount she's drinking but no matter what I do I can't get anymore into her. Even though I know this can be normal for babies who are teething & out of sorts I can't help but feel like a failure when she doesn't drink a full bottle & I'm fighting to get a few ounces into her & I'm beginning to think is there more wrong than teething.
And then she smiles that smile & she has me wrapped around her pudgy finger

nikpmup

Thanks folks; I think I'm just a little overwhelmed, and I'm full of guilt and regret at my inability to breastfeed. It was the one thing I wanted to do for him. I have to say, I have an amazing partner, he has been running around after me like nobody's business, keeping the house together, and reassuring me that I'm doing the right thing and that I'm doing a good job - I think without him I'd be sunk.
I have suffered from depression before, and all of the midwives and the PHN have been asking me about it; I think they're concerned that I might be at more of a risk of PND as a result. I hope that I will recognise the signs if I do develop it.

It ain't easy!