No Sleep and No Coffee Makes Parents Something Something

Emmadilema123

angeldelight wrote: »

Oh you poor thing that sounds horrible! Thankfully it's rare that my husband isn't here, I'd crack up

It's atrocious lol new baby in the house and my son has decided since daddy is gone all the time now that there is a monster in his wardrobe... He isn't here on Saturday nights though so daddy gets to sleep all the time lol typical!

On a happier note....the tooth fairy made her first visit to our house last night! Super cute!

Aveen

Just had baby no #2 two weeks ago, I thought I was having a girl but had second wee man. I'm delighted and he's perfect.
If I'm honest I'm full of guilt with been disappointed i didn't have a girl & finding baby blues hard with it. I tried to talk to my husband but he doesn't understand. My husband doesn't want more children and I had agreed before my wee man birth. I'm finding this hard, husband was speaking about the nip, I can't even think about this.

Feeling like the worst mum ever, I love my boys so much but wish I had a wee lady too

Lady is a tramp

Aveen wrote: »

Just had baby no #2 two weeks ago, I thought I was having a girl but had second wee man. I'm delighted and he's perfect.
If I'm honest I'm full of guilt with been disappointed i didn't have a girl & finding baby blues hard with it. I tried to talk to my husband but he doesn't understand. My husband doesn't want more children and I had agreed before my wee man birth. I'm finding this hard, husband was speaking about the nip, I can't even think about this.

Feeling like the worst mum ever, I love my boys so much but wish I had a wee lady too

Ah don't feel guilty. I think your feelings are completely normal and natural.

Were you told at the scan it was a girl, or were you just going on your gut instinct? I wanted a girl, and so I had to find out the gender at the 20 week scan. It gave me time to adjust to the idea that I was having a boy. If I was told it was a girl, and I ended up with a boy instead, I have to admit I'd be feeling like you do after the birth. As it was, I'd no feelings of disappointment, only because I knew what to expect.

Is the idea of another child completely off the cards, or would you broach it with your husband? At least ask him to put off getting the snip for now - having another child is probably something he won't even consider in the near future while you still have a newborn, but he might be more open to it when your two boys are a bit older.

Aveen

Lady is a tramp wrote: »

Ah don't feel guilty. I think your feelings are completely normal and natural.

Were you told at the scan it was a girl, or were you just going on your gut instinct? I wanted a girl, and so I had to find out the gender at the 20 week scan. It gave me time to adjust to the idea that I was having a boy. If I was told it was a girl, and I ended up with a boy instead, I have to admit I'd be feeling like you do after the birth. As it was, I'd no feelings of disappointment, only because I knew what to expect.

Is the idea of another child completely off the cards, or would you broach it with your husband? At least ask him to put off getting the snip for now - having another child is probably something he won't even consider in the near future while you still have a newborn, but he might be more open to it when your two boys are a bit older.

I was going my instinct, I wish I had of known now, I hate been in tears.

Not sure I can discuss with my husband he's so two children & no more.

I'm worried I'll end up with PPD, it isn't helped by close family member had a girl and a friend having a girl has their second. I don't understand way I feel like I've missed out on something I never had.

Thank you for not judging me

spottybananas

I don't have any advice but just want to point out (not in a b*tchy way just to point it out) that if you had another it may be a third boy, what then? So thinking of trying again wouldn't mean "solving" the issue and getting a girl, just something to try and remember even for now to get you through.

I could never see myself having a boy, my family is predominantly women. I had to find out the sex to come to terms with it, I was disappointed the night we found out but had braced myself for it, I nearly cried though. Obviously of course now I love him to bits and can't imagine if he had been a girl, but at the same time I've taught myself to realise that if we have another it could be another boy, and that's ok.

I'm incredibly close to my mother so fantasised about having that bond myself, but at the same time just because a child is a girl doesn't mean you'll have any more in common, you might have a son who you get on great with and a daughter who moves away and has no interest in contacting you as soon as she turns 18, gender means nothing in terms of the relationship you'll have. And there are pros and cons to both!

Aveen

spottybananas wrote: »

I don't have any advice but just want to point out (not in a b*tchy way just to point it out) that if you had another it may be a third boy, what then? So thinking of trying again wouldn't mean "solving" the issue and getting a girl, just something to try and remember even for now to get you through.

I could never see myself having a boy, my family is predominantly women. I had to find out the sex to come to terms with it, I was disappointed the night we found out but had braced myself for it, I nearly cried though. Obviously of course now I love him to bits and can't imagine if he had been a girl, but at the same time I've taught myself to realise that if we have another it could be another boy, and that's ok.

I'm incredibly close to my mother so fantasised about having that bond myself, but at the same time just because a child is a girl doesn't mean you'll have any more in common, you might have a son who you get on great with and a daughter who moves away and has no interest in contacting you as soon as she turns 18, gender means nothing in terms of the relationship you'll have. And there are pros and cons to both!

Hey spottybananas, you're completely right about the third, that problem is also in my mind.

I didn't realise I would have this strong of a feeling if it was a boy. I was even telling people I thought it was a boy to help myself not to completely rule it out.

I'd say in a few weeks I'll be grand but feeling so guilty. The two boys are so close in age that they be great friends & interested in similar things. There be no dividing what we doing pendin age suitable

dori_dormer

Just wanted to chime in and say I felt completely the same! I really wanted a girl, to make pretty dresses and dolls for etc. hubby thought no. 1 was a girl so let myself get excited. Found out accidentally at scan it was a boy. Was a weird sad feeling but thankfully had plenty of time to adjust before he arrived. And was very glad I'd found out because of that. Funny thing is I'm much better at lego, and cars and dinosaurs than makeup and dolls lol! But you never know what your child will be into as said abouve.
38 weeks on number 2 ( our last) and also purposely found out it's a boy early on. Wanted a girl so I could resist the urge to go again simply cos this pregnancy was so difficult. Now I'm worried I'll want to try again, just for the possibility of a girl!
Thankfully everyone around me seems to be having boys but I know my sis is going for another soon, and if she has a girl I'll prob have a little cry. I think it's pretty normal feeling especially if it's your last! It's very final you know?

Emmadilema123

spottybananas wrote: »

I don't have any advice but just want to point out (not in a b*tchy way just to point it out) that if you had another it may be a third boy, what then? So thinking of trying again wouldn't mean "solving" the issue and getting a girl, just something to try and remember even for now to get you through.

I could never see myself having a boy, my family is predominantly women. I had to find out the sex to come to terms with it, I was disappointed the night we found out but had braced myself for it, I nearly cried though. Obviously of course now I love him to bits and can't imagine if he had been a girl, but at the same time I've taught myself to realise that if we have another it could be another boy, and that's ok.

I'm incredibly close to my mother so fantasised about having that bond myself, but at the same time just because a child is a girl doesn't mean you'll have any more in common, you might have a son who you get on great with and a daughter who moves away and has no interest in contacting you as soon as she turns 18, gender means nothing in terms of the relationship you'll have. And there are pros and cons to both!

My daughter is so independent but when she wants anything it's her daddy she wants. My son has been stuck to me since birth (now 5) and we have a really close relationship. Mummy's boys and daddy's girls all around here!

angeldelight

I hate leaps! 14 month old went to sleep grand at 7.30 but is awake since 10 messing in her cot and I have to stay sitting outside her room or she goes nuts. GO ASLEEP!!

dori_dormer

Any one else stuck under a sweaty baby? Cluster feeding in this heat is misery

fro9etb8j5qsl2

Ah congrats dori! Cluster feeding is no fun and I can only imagine doing it in this heat :eek:

Betsie_xr3i

Aahhhh have run out of tassimo disks and an house bound with 3 children ranging from 4 to 4 weeks I need my coffee

dori_dormer

Little fella broke me last night. Screamed the whole night unless he was feeding ( which he didn't really want to do for more than 10 minutes at a go. So the whole house was awake from 10pm til 7 when we had to get up anyway. Wrecked is not the word. he basically only dozed for 5 minutes when finished feeding and then screaming commenced once more.
He still hadn't slept by 11 this mornign so I caved and gave him a soother. Really didn't want to as I think this young it'll mess with his feeding. But I had to for my sanity. Managed to gets im to sleep in the sling then for an hour. Which I think took the edge of exhaustion off him and allowed me to have a shower and eat something.
The child really needs to poop! Anyone know if there's anything you can do to help a breastfed 3 week old poop?

spottybananas

There isn't really anything you can do at that age, when did he poo last? Some bf babies can go up to about a week without a poo and it's still normal....not that I'd know as mine pooed almost constantly for months!

cyning

How long is it since he pooped dori? A warm bath, bicycle legs and nappy free time might help?

bp

Try drink some orange juice....always got mine pooping like mad when I bf!

dori_dormer

Tried all those things thanks guys! Yeah didn't think there would be anything more I could do. He poops every morning like clockwork. Last sat he didn't poo and was so cranky and whinge and uncomfortable. Cried all sat night. When he pooped sunday you could tell there was a massive difference in him. Relaxed again and slept well, minimal crying. He hasntpoopednow sincetuesday and he's been miserable!
My first only pooped nonce a week, but he wasn't upset by it so it was fine.

yellow hen

It's not really about the length of time between poos that matters but moreso whether the poo is soft or hard. My first pooed every second day but was constipated all the time and only pooed hard marbles. Second only poos every 3-4 days but it's pure liquid. He's probably not, but are you sure he's not refluxy? That sort of intense crying sounds a bit like that. Constipation would a common side effect

Makapakka

5th night of broken sleep, 5th of been woken every 20 minutes of crying, to being given pushed away when trying get to help her,to bringing her into my bed to have her settle but being constantly kicked in the ribs and back. I have no where else to put this. I want a full night sleep:'(

dori_dormer

Makapakka wrote: »

5th night of broken sleep, 5th of been woken every 20 minutes of crying, to being given pushed away when trying get to help her,to bringing her into my bed to have her settle but being constantly kicked in the ribs and back. I have no where else to put this. I want a full night sleep:'(

What age is she? Sounds like a leap. We had horrible ones when our boy was about 12 and 18 mths old. OH was away for the first one and I nearly had a nervous breakdown

Makapakka

dori_dormer wrote: »

What age is she? Sounds like a leap. We had horrible ones when our boy was about 12 and 18 mths old. OH was away for the first one and I nearly had a nervous breakdown

She's 3, but she has gone into a new bed so that's probably the cause of it.

madeinamerica

Lying, not sleeping, in a parent-bed in the children's hospital beside my poor 2 yr old, in with pneumonia, and it reminds me so much of the first night we brought him home: I can't sleep as I jump at every peep he makes, I have to keep checking his breathing and want to just hold his little hand.

Tomorrow's going to be fun, yawn!! He's slowly on the mend, thankfully.

bp

madeinamerica wrote: »

Lying, not sleeping, in a parent-bed in the children's hospital beside my poor 2 yr old, in with pneumonia, and it reminds me so much of the first night we brought him home: I can't sleep as I jump at every peep he makes, I have to keep checking his breathing and want to just hold his little hand.

Tomorrow's going to be fun, yawn!! He's slowly on the mend, thankfully.

I hope he gets better soon, hugs

Atomicjuicer0

My brain has given up sleep.

Busy day at work tomorrow, PHN appointment that has already been postponed and OH is sick.

I should be in a bad mood but I suppose it could be worse.

Reads previous post...

Yup, you win!

madeinamerica wrote: »

Lying, not sleeping, in a parent-bed in the children's hospital beside my poor 2 yr old, in with pneumonia, and it reminds me so much of the first night we brought him home: I can't sleep as I jump at every peep he makes, I have to keep checking his breathing and want to just hold his little hand.

Tomorrow's going to be fun, yawn!! He's slowly on the mend, thankfully.

dori_dormer

I spent two weeks in Crumlin hospital with my little fella recently. Place would drive you insane! I literally left his side for only 24hrs total. It's scary and horrible and the days blurred together.
They have chair beds which barely fit in the room

madeinamerica

dori_dormer wrote: »

I spent two weeks in Crumlin hospital with my little fella recently. Place would drive you insane! I literally left his side for only 24hrs total. It's scary and horrible and the days blurred together.
They have chair beds which barely fit in the room

We were only in 3 days, my heart goes out to anyone who is in longer, it's exhausting both physically and mentality.

We were in tallaght and the bed was actually fine. My only complaint was the room was roasting! Try tallaght next time

It's our first experience of a children's hospital here in Ireland and i must say I was very impressed, a couple of things not 100% but most was great.

dori_dormer

Oh I'm glad it was OK. We were referred to Crumlin from the combe so no choice. Will Def try Tallaght. We were in a lovely room them got moved wards. Tiny room, all glass walls no curtains even for breastfeeding.

No complaints about care or staff but accommodation want great. In fairness the nurses always apologised for it but it hasn't been upgraded in decades

madeinamerica

dori_dormer wrote: »

Oh I'm glad it was OK. We were referred to Crumlin from the combe so no choice. Will Def try Tallaght. We were in a lovely room them got moved wards. Tiny room, all glass walls no curtains even for breastfeeding.

No complaints about care or staff but accommodation want great. In fairness the nurses always apologised for it but it hasn't been upgraded in decades

God that room sounds brutal! 2 weeks in a fishbowl!

LegacyUser

We have been here about 10 days
The medical staff are very considerate but not the nurses.

The most of the nurses have an attitude that their too good to do anything. The are very skilled in emotionally blackmailing parens to make them to do all the care. When they offer help it only to ensure they get their breaks on time.

Their are totally hand off. They are professional at ensuring the parents provide 24 care. They make it clear one parent must be on the ward at all times. The actually encourage you to sleep in the babaies room.
I dont think one nurse feed or changed my child; they certainly didnt wind him. The answer to wind was to give paracetamol or bruphen or a sedation. My self and my part are professionals allied to medicine and have knowledge of health care. When our child blood pressure was high they said the monitor was faulty but they never checked manually with a syphgmanometer & stethoscope.
One nure remocednthe nasgastric tube without permission then blamed it on the bady

dori_dormer wrote: »

I spent two weeks in Crumlin hospital with my little fella recently. Place would drive you insane! I literally left his side for only 24hrs total. It's scary and horrible and the days blurred together.
They have chair beds which barely fit in the room

spottybananas

So they suggested a parent should stay with their sick child at all times, and expected that you'd want to care for them, changing nappies, winding, etc? I wouldn't consider that staff work, and surely it's good that they allow a parent to stay.