Would you be turned off by someone having a kid?

padd b1975

padd b1975 wrote: »

It could be a turn off for me, if the child was an ill-mannered little brat.
Otherwise, it would not cause me a second thought.

In that case the parent is probably an ill mannered little brat too so you wouldn't be overly fond of them either :P

BabyGorilla

Would you be turned off by someone having a kid?

- well yes Kent, yes I would.

I think this pic explains it for me.

http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a267/C-Train/OWNED38.jpg

karaokeman

NegativeCreep wrote: »

Does she have kids?

No, but I would still date her if she did.

NegativeCreep

karaokeman wrote: »

No, but I would still date her if she did.

I'd ride her if she had 50 kids. I'd crawl through a mile of broken glass to hear her fart through a walkie talkie.

KERSPLAT!

I don't think I'd have a problem with it, though it has never happened to me

JustAThought

Yes - it would be a deal breaker and would be for many of my circle of friends too.

Rubylolz

H2UMrsRobinson wrote: »

Baggage comes in all shapes and sizes and does not always have arms and legs.

Yep exactly!!...

Rho b

I would not be turned off as I am a parent. I can understand the juggling that a single parent has to do in order to facilitate their children and a relationship. It is not easy and it does take an understanding willing partnership to make it successful.

Mint Aero

Loves an overweight single mammy on the scratcher for bit of howz yer father. Relationship? No.

ardinn

Currently in a kind of relationship with a girl who has a 12 yr old. Not really an issue - I am however reluctant to press on with things as if it does'nt work out there are 2 people who may (or may not) get hurt - it's confusing and I dont really know what to do.

I'm wondering what my role would be or how involved I would have to get. The little girl spends most weekends at her dads and she is 12 so its easier than having a 4/5 yr old asking daddy questions but I dunno, it's a bit new to me!

Anyone any advice from experience?

Femme_Fatale

ardinn wrote: »

Currently in a kind of relationship with a girl who has a 12 yr old.

Skim-reading. Misread as you're currently in a relationship with a 12 yr old. Sorry about that.

ardinn

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

Skim-reading. Misread as you're currently in a relationship with a 12 yr old. Sorry about that.

I actually wrote that first - beer typing skillz!

Galwayguy35

Tried it twice, never again, first time round I was told that I would have to help to pay for 2 kids even though the 2 fathers paid nothing, that was the end of that.

Second time around things were going well but the kid was a little demon who was jealous of every minute I spent with her mother, would even come into the room when we were in bed together.

Gongoozler

She told you you had to pay support?

Nah don't think I could. For something casual I surprise it'd be fine, anything more would be a no. Don't want kids and definitely don't want dealings with kids from someone else. Sounds like a nightmare.

Galwayguy35

Gongoozler wrote: »

She told you you had to pay support?

Nah don't think I could. For something casual I surprise it'd be fine, anything more would be a no. Don't want kids and definitely don't want dealings with kids from someone else. Sounds like a nightmare.

Yeah, pay for the day to day stuff for them, she wasn't working.

Gongoozler

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

Yeah, pay for the day to day stuff for them, she wasn't working.

Wow. The cheek!

canadianwoman

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

Yeah, pay for the day to day stuff for them, she wasn't working.

If you were living with her in her home with them, I would say yes but if you were simply sleeping over occasionally then definitely no.

c_man

Mint Aero wrote: »

Loves an overweight single mammy on the scratcher for bit of howz yer father. Relationship? No.

This, but said in a nicer way.

bnt

I'd definitely avoid someone with younger kids, say under 10 (roughly). They would always come first in the relationship. Once they grow up a bit they become a bit more self-sufficient and don't monopolise their mother's attention.

And straight away I can see the above statement causing a reaction such as "how selfish of you!" - but the question is about what I want, and I'm not going to apologise for not being totally selfless. I don't have to get involved: a relationship is not a duty, a job or a vocation, everyone involved should benefit from it.

Galwayguy35

canadianwoman wrote: »

If you were living with her in her home with them, I would say yes but if you were simply sleeping over occasionally then definitely no.

I wasn't living with her.

Tasden

I have a child and the guy I'm seeing has a child. My ex is in the picture for five minutes each week (collect and drop off of my child), his ex is there day in day out in a very overwhelming way. We have two very different situations in terms of "baggage" yet we both have the same amount of children.

Even without my child I'm a person that likes my freedom in a relationship so I think its easier for me to come second to a partners child as I'm not very comfortable being someones first/only priority in general, I get suffocated by partners that are too keen or don't give me space. So its not an issue with me.

But its becoming increasingly apparent that the ex/babys mother can be an issue that I will weigh up in future. Ironic since I am one but I have absolutely no involvement in my exes life so its different.