The 'Funny (ha, ha)' side of religion

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wprathead wrote: »

If you have time read this hilarious twitter conversation

I read it on the bus home from work and was nearly in tears laughing

Jesus came all over her.

Hotblack Desiato

Well I wanna wanna see the pictures that prove what Jesus's skin tone was.

Only one choice for decent colour reproduction after 2000 years in the archive - Kodachrome (and presumably daylight, not tungsten.)

Sulla Felix

Cabaal wrote: »

#10. Vaccines Make You Gay


Holy crap, that must mean fishermen and people that eat mainly fish must be super gay. Stupid mercury!

There was that group of syphilis ridden monks in scotland who had a diet high in fish sometime in the late medieval/early renaissance...

Edit: Why do I know about them? I've been reading Short History of Nearly Everything, something something radiocarbon dating.

Obliq

Sulla Felix wrote: »

There was that group of syphilis ridden monks in scotland who had a diet high in fish sometime in the late medieval/early renaissance...

Edit: Why do I know about them? I've been reading Short History of Nearly Everything, something something radiocarbon dating.

Excellent! I've just started re-reading that (and by re-reading, I mean that it seems like I've never read it before.....sigh). Am reading 'Down Under' at the same time though. And Iain Banks's 'The Quarry'. No wonder I can't remember what I've read.

Sulla Felix

Obliq wrote: »

Excellent! I've just started re-reading that (and by re-reading, I mean that it seems like I've never read it before.....sigh). Am reading 'Down Under' at the same time though. And Iain Banks's 'The Quarry'. No wonder I can't remember what I've read.

I know the feeling. I've read it two or three times and listened to it I'm not too sure how many times, because it goes on shuffle for any long journeys.

Genghiz Cohen

My first copy of ALIVE! came through the letter box this morning!

WHAT ARE THEY DOING TO OUR DAUGHTERS!?!?!?!?!?!?!11!!?!?!one!?!?!

http://imgur.com/a/rDDcO

robindch

^^^ Also available in handy PDF format, here:

http://www.alive.ie/uploads/6/5/1/1/6511516/alive_dec_2013.pdf

Alive wrote:

Thousands of teenage girls in Ireland are being given the Gardasil HPV vaccination (the so-called "cervical cancer" vaccine). But do parents know the risks to their children?

Before and since the introduction to Ireland of Gardasil, we have been appealing to Health Ministers (Mary Harney and now James Reilly) to halt the vaccination here until its effectiveness and safety are established. We have kept the Minister up-to-date on the frightening list of reactions being reported from many countries, including deaths and grave physical and neurological diseases. Young girls full of the joys of life, high achievers with no health issues, have become shadows of their old selves, in constant pain and in need of full-time care. Some are dead, "cause of death unknown". The common denominator for all: Gardasil (see their stories on www.sanevax.org. The list of adverse reactions reported to our Irish Medicines Board (IMB) includes: convulsions, eczema, psoriasis, hallucinations, swelling and painful eyes, visual impairment, chest pains, back pain, panic attacks, muscle twitching, nerve paralysis, vomiting, disorientation, hyperventilation, sleeping sickness (narcolepsy), abnormal liver function, insomnia, neuralgia, indications of premature menopause - hot flushes (in teenagers!).

The HSE information pamphlet for parents and guardians states that "there may be some mild side effects". Could any sane person describe these side effects as "mild"? Misled Reports now coming in from Australia etc., link Gardasil to multiple sclerosis, lupus, glandular fever type illness and suicidal thoughts! The HSE pamphlet also states: "The HPV vaccine protects us from cervical cancer" and the slogan at the back of this pamphlet reads "I'm protected now for the future" (emphasis by HSE).

Yet the Health Information and Quality Authority (HIQA) Report on HPV Vaccine (p.10, 1.2.) clearly says: "the protective effect of the vaccine against invasive cervical cancer has not yet been demonstrated." So why are parents and young women being misled? The HIQA Report also refers to a possible link between Gardasil and the deadly Guillian-Barre Syndrome and deaths (HIQA Report p.32.3.8). There is no mention of these dangers in the HSE pamphlet. Why? Was this information deliberately kept from parents and teenagers? Nor were parents told that Merck, manufacturers of the vaccine, had expressed concern about giving it to girls who already had the virus in their systems.

Clinical trials indicated that if these girls were vaccinated, their risk of developing cervical cancer could be increased by almost 45%. We know that some recipients of the vaccine were already sexually active, because miscarriage is reported in the IMB list of side effects. The HSE pamphlet says that pregnant girls should not receive the vaccine, so why was it given to pregnant girls? Who slipped up? Who will be held responsible? Finally, why were parents denied access to the User Information leaflet, despite the clear direction on it to "Read all of this leaflet carefully before you or your child are vaccinated."

Dr. James Reilly, Minister for Health is well aware of the facts outlined in the HIQA Report. Even while in opposition he quoted the report often enough - though selectively - when he was campaigning to have the vaccine rolled out here in Ireland. He knows that there is no evidence that it will prevent even one cancer. Dr. Reilly must also know of the increased risk of girls developing cancer if they are vaccinated while they have the virus. He knows of the terrible cost to the lives, health and welfare of tens of thousands of girls around the globe. He knows too that Irish girls are already paying the price of his failure to fully inform them and their parents of the whole truth about Gardasil.

- by Theresa Heaney, Mothers' Alliance of Ireland

For more info contact: Theresa, Tel: 087-4189575 or Nora, Tel: 087-6486679

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This sort of tripe should be made illegal. That magazine used to drive me bananas.

PopePalpatine

Nah, it's useful if you've ran out of tabloids for your dog to use. :pac:

Cabaal

robindch wrote: »

^^^ Also available in handy PDF format, here:

http://www.alive.ie/uploads/6/5/1/1/6511516/alive_dec_2013.pdf

Even the Irish Daily Mail supports this vaccine, although the UK Daily Mail are very much against it
:rolleyes:

UK Daily Mail does stories like this - http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1094624/Twelve-year-old-girl-paralysed-given-cervical-cancer-jab.html

Irish Daily Mail does a campaign like this

Turtwig

In fairness to Alive, RTE has been just as awful on this lately. Pandermix vaccine 13 times more likely to give people nacrolepsy. That's horrific! Waitttt a second, 13 times more likely than what? Can't find the bloody thing right now but I think it was quantified at around 1 in 50,000 or .00001. The risks far out weighed the benefit, but it obviously goes without saying if there is a causative agent in the vaccine causing Nacrolepsy then it needs to be understood. So as to be better able to quantify risk for various demographics.

What really pissed me off though was insinuation that because Doctors were advised to no longer administer the vaccine it was due to the safety concerns over the vaccine. Eh, no. It was because the vaccine which was sequenced for H1N1 is now as useful as an ashtray on a motor cycle.

Cabaal

Reminds me of this,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfdZTZQvuCo

I know which side I'm on

Full episode appears to be here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLcOz4EKrxg

smacl

wprathead wrote: »

If you have time read this hilarious twitter conversation

I read it on the bus home from work and was nearly in tears laughing

Seems a few people found it funny

DazMarz

I laughed at this a lot more than I should have:

irish_goat

Turtwig

irish_goat wrote: »

http://asset-8.soup.io/asset/6324/8360_8609_500.jpeg

Put it inside a volanco or oven and see if it survives. It's closer to neotenous. Not any bit eternal.
/pedant
(I owe my own clarification of this misconception to recedite.)

Obliq

Jernal wrote: »

Not any bit eternal.
/pedant

Damn! *Insert face-palm meme of choice*

Kivaro

Cabaal

it does mention christian beliefs :P

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYNaEM2O5pU

robindch

Atheist Suicide Bomber Kills Eighteen Agnostics

http://thelapine.ca/atheist-suicide-bomber-kills-eighteen-agnostics-0/

The Lapine wrote:

STOCKHOLM -In a frightening display of rising sectarian violence, an atheist suicide bomber blew himself up on a busy street in Stockholm three days ago; killing eighteen agnostics and wounding over thirty. Members of the ‘Swedish Atheistic Liberation Front’ (SALF) have claimed responsibility for the bombing. Declaring the attack as revenge against the explosive agnostic riots, which, last week, hospitalized several atheists and terrorized the atheistic community.

Swedish authorities have so far failed stem the rising levels of violence and growing sectarian divide. The prime minister of Sweden Fredrik Reinfeldt, himself an agnostic, strongly condemned the attack, yet also called for restraint among the broader agnostic community. In an impromptu speech, the prime minister called on agnostics to not contribute to the violence, or launch vengeful vigilante attacks, saying that the proper authorities would see justice done.

Yet Mr. Reinfeldt’s message seems to be falling on deaf ears, prominent agnostic leaders and bloggers have already began urging retaliatory attacks in what is an ominous sign for the future of sectarian violence in Sweden. Sectarian divisions and violence have been increasing ever since the breakdown in talks between the mostly agnostic Government and the violently separatist SALF.

SALF, and the atheists they claim to represent, believe that there is no god, agnostics believe that there may not be a god. To outsiders, this difference in doctrine seems almost irrelevant; to believers it is a question of life or death. Therefore, such a small difference in doctrine can create such explosive hatreds, divisions and violence.

The spiraling violence has already purged once religiously diverse neighborhoods into homogenous sectarian strongholds of either atheists or agnostics. Strongholds, which, since the latest SALF terrorism, have begun exchanging nightly mortar fire in the escalating conflict that Swedish authorities seem unable to contain.

So far the United Nations response has been limited to broad condemnations of the violence from both sides; while Norway and Finland have been preparing for an influx of refugees and planning for the creation of possible peacekeeping buffer zones within Sweden in case the rising violence transforms into the civil war many expect. The United States, afraid of being embroiled in a long intractable conflict, have confined their involvement to verbal support for moderates on both sides of the sectarian divide. At this point, all one can do is put in concentrated thought that Sweden’s Atheists and Agnostics can reconcile before civil war breaks out and, together, realize the dream of one united Sweden.

AstraMonti

"Sir, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Cthulu?"

smacl

Why hell is exothermic

Pherekydes

"...all souls go to Hell."

:eek::pac::D

kylith

robindch

An immunologist drops by the internet after a few beers.

Cabaal

Time to continue the war against Dihydrogen Monoxide! :pac:

http://www.dhmo.org/facts.html

robindch

Coincidentally, on that immunologist screenshot above:

http://www.thejournal.ie/vaccination-ireland-1228491-Dec2013/

“...despite advice and education, his siblings remain unvaccinated...” - grrrr....!

norrie rugger

Oh sweet baby FSM!!

Obliq

robindch wrote: »

“...despite advice and education, his siblings remain unvaccinated...” - grrrr....!

That is so unfunny. The article about what he went through is still less funny though :mad:

This sh*t should be TAUGHT to people. There should be actual educational workshops that parents get sent on if they don't want to vaccinate their kids. They should be obliged to only opt out as and when they sign off on having done the course work on the kinds of ways their kids could die/be maimed or disabled for life.

FFS, if you're unemployed you can be forced onto a course that makes sod all difference to anybody except the heavily massaged live register figures, because so many unemployed make Ireland look bad. If you're a parent endangering your children and a multitude of others with your stupidity over vaccinations, there's nothing the state can do about it? Good one state. Way to go.

seamus

robindch wrote: »

Coincidentally, on that immunologist screenshot above:

http://www.thejournal.ie/vaccination-ireland-1228491-Dec2013/

“...despite advice and education, his siblings remain unvaccinated...” - grrrr....!

The child also appears to have had a thorn in his foot for 12 days.

Some sterling parenting all round there. I'm going to guess that their children's health takes something of a back seat in general. It's the "principle" of the thing.