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The 'Funny (ha, ha)' side of religion

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,092 ✭✭✭catbear


    CptMackey wrote: »
    Ya. Just saw it this morning. Have to visit a lot of churches with work.
    Do you deliver summonses?


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,718 ✭✭✭AstraMonti


    CptMackey wrote: »
    Ya. Just saw it this morning. Have to visit a lot of churches with work.

    There are so many crazy stuff in these few lines, it's truly amazing.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,329 ✭✭✭Bandana boy


    catbear wrote: »
    Do you deliver summonses?

    Ghost-buster ?
    Organ Tuner ?
    Small candle delivery man ?



    We need to know !


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,116 ✭✭✭Trent Houseboat


    Ghost-buster ?
    Organ Tuner ?
    Small candle delivery man ?



    We need to know !

    My money's on Securicor, escorting the vast amounts of cash extorted from elderly parishioners over the weekend.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    CptMackey wrote: »
    Apparently gluten free bread isn't good enough for mass.

    Crazy stuff altogether really

    Free wine???


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,788 ✭✭✭CptMackey


    Ghost-buster ?
    Organ Tuner ?
    Small candle delivery man ?



    We need to know !

    None of the above .

    I'm like the grim reaper :pac:


  • Registered Users Posts: 855 ✭✭✭mickoneill31


    CptMackey wrote: »
    Apparently gluten free bread isn't good enough for mass.

    Crazy stuff altogether really

    Coeliacs have no need to worry. Transubstantiation will convert the bread to the body of Christ. Pretty sure he wasn't made of bread.

    Similarly alcoholics probably have nothing to fear from the blood.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,707 ✭✭✭Worztron


    381105.jpg

    Mitch Hedberg: "Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something."



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,092 ✭✭✭catbear


    CptMackey wrote: »
    None of the above .

    I'm like the grim reaper :pac:
    Ah right, that would explain it. I hear spring can be a busy time.


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 24,417 Mod ✭✭✭✭robindch


    CptMackey wrote: »
    Apparently gluten free bread isn't good enough for mass.
    It's related to the whole "leavened and unleavened bread" stuff that's part of judaism as well - as you say, crazy stuff.

    Brings new meaning to the phrase "cafeteria catholics" all the same.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 17,736 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    Surely if the God magic can turn bread into flesh, while not having any measurable change, it could turn gluten free bread into God-approved bread without there being any measurable change?


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Why did Gid make people coeliac and then refuse gluten free bread. He really is a dickhead, that lad


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,161 ✭✭✭✭M5


    381418.gif


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,898 ✭✭✭✭Ken.


    381466.jpg


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,707 ✭✭✭Worztron


    381507.jpg

    Mitch Hedberg: "Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something."



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭The Randy Riverbeast


    Is it suitable for vegetarians? It looks like for dietary purposes it is considered bread and not human flesh. Probably to get around health and safety.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,707 ✭✭✭Worztron


    381528.jpg

    Mitch Hedberg: "Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something."



  • Registered Users Posts: 18,338 ✭✭✭✭silverharp


    QFwOoBt.jpg

    A belief in gender identity involves a level of faith as there is nothing tangible to prove its existence which, as something divorced from the physical body, is similar to the idea of a soul. - Colette Colfer



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,247 ✭✭✭pauldla


    1620419_10156745880355080_227551406330365209_n.jpg?oh=b3f078979149a8b4b335009463e5c0a8&oe=578FFEDF


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,707 ✭✭✭Worztron


    381567.jpg

    Mitch Hedberg: "Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something."



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  • Registered Users Posts: 18,338 ✭✭✭✭silverharp


    religionofwar.png

    A belief in gender identity involves a level of faith as there is nothing tangible to prove its existence which, as something divorced from the physical body, is similar to the idea of a soul. - Colette Colfer



  • Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators, Regional South East Moderators Posts: 28,497 Mod ✭✭✭✭Cabaal


    Who knew they were religions?

    381748.PNG


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,247 ✭✭✭pauldla


    12003230_1354758231216267_6914295252567011130_n.jpg?oh=f7e31d099354d1b27dd1588ac025b75d&oe=577A691C


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 24,417 Mod ✭✭✭✭robindch




  • Registered Users Posts: 8,707 ✭✭✭Worztron


    382227.jpg

    Mitch Hedberg: "Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something."



  • Registered Users Posts: 5,718 ✭✭✭AstraMonti


    jesus_dribbble.gif

    Poor jesus.. like one time wasn't enough..


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 24,417 Mod ✭✭✭✭robindch


    AstraMonti wrote: »
    Poor jesus.. like one time wasn't enough..
    Still, it's better than child labour I suppose.

    Meanwhile, here's some tips on giving a successful TED talk:



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,992 ✭✭✭✭recedite


    A guy like that could have a great career in the clergy. Not as well respected as it used to be, but the jobs are still available.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,092 ✭✭✭catbear


    recedite wrote: »
    A guy like that could have a great career in the clergy. Not as well respected as it used to be, but the jobs are still available.
    It would be the cushiest number for a confirmed bachelor but the smell of old people all the time would be a serious turnoff. Having said that I have a distant relation who's secret family hasn't stopped him ministering to his innocent flock. I think him having to cover loads of rural parishes gives him the perfect smokescreen to move around.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 34,907 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    catbear wrote: »
    It would be the cushiest number for a confirmed bachelor but the smell of old people all the time would be a serious turnoff.

    Maybe gerontophilia will be the next scandal :eek:

    The Dublin Airport cap is damaging the economy of Ireland as a whole, and must be scrapped forthwith.



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