The 'Funny (ha, ha)' side of religion

PopePalpatine

Scheisse, that reminds me, I left my copy of the Hitchhikers' quadrilogy on the train to Birmingham.

Hotblack Desiato

You should have left it on a train to somewhere where they'd understand it :pac:

Buuuuurminumm?

'Shaaaroooonn!!!'

Worztron

Lucifer MorningStar

Worztron

Lucifer MorningStar

Worztron

Delirium

AstraMonti

CLINICAL STUDY SHOWS ATHEISTS HAVE FAR LOWER IQ'S THAN BELIEVERS

Cabaal

http://waterfordwhispersnews.com/2014/06/23/church-to-remove-angelus-from-rte-over-macgrianna-wedding/

WWN has today learned that the Catholic Church has called to remove the Angelus from it’s coveted prime time spot on RTE following the wedding of Aengus MacGrianna to his long-term partner at the weekend.

49-year-old MacGrianna, who was walked down the aisle by former RTE colleague and close friend Anne Doyle, married his boyfriend of ten years Terry Gill in an intimate ceremony at Ballymacgarvey County House and Estate.

The joyous union, which at time of publication was causing no ill effects to any facet of society in the slightest, is being treated as the final straw by members of the church who see it as a further undermining of the fundamental Christian morals on which RTE was founded. In retaliation, the Church intend to strip the state broadcaster of the rights to air The Angelus, the longest running TV show in Irish history.

“Two lads marrying each other in a ****in’ hotel, are you ****in’ having me on, hi” said Monsignor Pete Muldoon, chief spokesperson for production company Vaticantastic TV.

“RTE have shat all over the St. Bridgets Cross for the last time. There was a time when they were a friend to the church; maybe turn a blind eye to the odd scandalous headline or two. But now, their leading anchorman is a gay lad who got married to another gay lad? And they think we’re going to let them keep the Angelus? **** that”.

RTE have responded to the news by announcing they have no notion of taking any action against MacGrianna, and have conceded the loss of Irelands number one bell-based show.

The announcement also stated that the Six-One News will not be re-named, and that they would just show another ad or two to make up the time. Mr. MacGrianna, honeymooning in Greece, was unavailable for comment.

In a further shocking development, rumours abound that rival station TV3 are about to make a multi-hundred euro bid to secure the rights to the prestigious religious programme. The beleaguered broadcaster, licking it’s wounds following the loss of Coronation Street and Emmerdale, is expected to relaunch the Angelus with a fresh new look in the Autumn.

This fresh take is said to better represent modern Ireland, and will replace the familiar “gong” sound with the “bwaaam” from the Inception trailer, set against scenes of people emigrating, protesting against the installation of water meters, and watching crime based programmes on TV3.

Love the last part,
For anyone that watches honest trailers you'll know this gets a good mention in loads of the trailers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2cS5Fv5xIQ

the_syco

AstraMonti wrote: »

CLINICAL STUDY SHOWS ATHEISTS HAVE FAR LOWER IQ'S THAN BELIEVERS

Works better on facebook :P

TheChizler

Cabaal wrote: »

http://waterfordwhispersnews.com/2014/06/23/church-to-remove-angelus-from-rte-over-macgrianna-wedding/



Love the last part,
For anyone that watches honest trailers you'll know this gets a good mention in loads of the trailers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2cS5Fv5xIQ

Damn it you just sent me off on 4 hours of YouTube -> Wikipedia clicking.

smacl

Delirium

Worztron

robindch

robindch

Mouth-watering, uh, what?

Islam Ireland wrote:

The Islamic Cultural Centre of Ireland is delighted to present the Pre-Ramadan Bazaar on Friday and Saturday 20th and 21st July 2014 from 12.00pm-5.00pm. From mouth-watering teats to inspiring books to handcrafted decor, there will be something for everyone at this year's Bazaar.

Pherekydes

July 20 and 21 are Sunday and Monday, not Friday and Saturday.

Dades

robindch wrote: »

Mouth-watering, uh, what?

Oooh matron!

Lucifer MorningStar

robindch

Pherekydes wrote: »

July 20 and 21 are Sunday and Monday, not Friday and Saturday.

For 2014, yes, they're wrong. They're right for 2012 though, so has this splendid typo been up there for two years?

Aenaes

Mouth-watering teats, eh? Now there's a religion I could get in to!

recedite

Be careful, it doesn't say whether they are attached to woman or goat.
It does however say "there will be something for everyone at this year's Bazaar".

Hotblack Desiato

recedite wrote: »

It does however say "there will be something for everyone at this year's Bazaar".

Grand, bacon sarnie and a cold beer for me please

Bannasidhe

ninja900 wrote: »

Grand, bacon sarnie and a cold beer for me please

Ohhh...pulled pork on sourdough and a chilled sweetish cider for me please.

Hotblack Desiato

Feckin' hipsters.

Worztron

Cabaal

Introducing

Crossfit Jesus

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1q31CCDVdas

Hotblack Desiato

Worztron wrote: »

"Who is your plumber? Jesus?"

Know a few of them. Promise to come back but never do.

Delirium

This site is sure to convert all the kidz :P

Penn

When Creationists say that not all scientists agree with evolution, I bet they're counting Professor Giraffenstein as one of the ones who don't.

seamus

That site.....that's Poe's law right there. Like this, WTF is this? It has to be a parody, right:

http://objectiveministries.org/creation/dinoexpedition.html

"Conclusive proof" apparently that dinosaurs are not extinct and Aptasaurs still roam the Congo jungle.

Cabaal

seamus wrote: »

"Conclusive proof" apparently that dinosaurs are not extinct and Aptasaurs still roam the Congo jungle.

The photographic evidence looks nothing like an elephant foot


:rolleyes:

Knex*

"The creation scientist", bit of an oxymoron there.

Worztron

kiffer

SW wrote: »

This site is sure to convert all the kidz :P

http://youtu.be/bgybr7BWY-w

robindch

seamus wrote: »

That site.....that's Poe's law right there. Like this, WTF is this? It has to be a parody, right:

http://objectiveministries.org/creation/dinoexpedition.html

Objective Ministries are related to Landover Baptist.

'nuff said.

recedite

seamus wrote: »

That site.....that's Poe's law right there.

The peppered moth is the clue. Also giraffes themselves; its pretty obvious they evolved the long necks to browse on high trees.

James74

The doctor in the article is call Dr. Wen Po, but I soooo want Big Game Hunter Nigel Stubbingwicke to be a real person. His resume and career highlight are genius.

CramCycle

James74 wrote: »

The doctor in the article is call Dr. Wen Po, but I soooo want Big Game Hunter Nigel Stubbingwicke to be a real person. His resume and career highlight are genius.

Career Highlights:

• 1961 - Born.

HA, brilliant

James74

A few choice highlights from Mr. Stubbingwicke...

1987 - Took time off to live with the Komodo dragons of Indonesia, gaining their trust and learning their ways. Fascinating predators, Komodo dragons.
1989 - Served as tracker for Chinese scientific expedition studying snow leopards in Tibet. Had chance encounter with what I now believe to have been a yeti.
1997 - Tracked and recovered orang-utan that was terrorising the streets of Paris. Returned it safely to Ménagerie du Jardin des Plantes whence it escaped.
1999 - Trained computer-programmer survivalists in the ways of the hunt. Those pallid **** would've been doomed had the Y2K disaster come to pass.

smacl

Lucifer MorningStar

Worztron

Delirium

AstraMonti

robindch

AstraMonti

^ Please explain!

robindch

^^ It's a cartoon from the New Yorker.

Their best ones riff upon the topic of middle-aged inadequacy, the loss of the joy, carelessness and opportunity of youth, damaged and broken relationships. Tired cynicism. And lots of meta.

http://www.condenaststore.com/~/cartoon-bank

Worztron