Lost gay guy! Advice?

lemons21

I am a 21 year old guy and I think I might be gay because I am attracted to guys and I don't feel attracted to women in the same way. I have felt like this since about 2008.
When I started secondary school at first I was very shy and I didn't mix well but after a few weeks I got on well with people and I ended up making friends with the popular people in the class. At this time everybody was talking about girls but I didn't feel the same but I went along with it because I thought it would come after a few years. During this time I went out with girls and I was happy out. I never dreamt that I could be gay, at this time.
When I was about 15 I thought that things were going well. I was friends with the popular sporty lads at school and was getting on going out with someone that I liked. One day tough a new teacher that was just out of college started in our school and I just felt something about him that I never felt before and it took me a couple of days to figure out that I was attracted to him. When I realised this I knew I didn't want to be gay because I knew it wasn't the life I wanted to lead. So, I stayed with my girlfriend and pretended everything was going great. I was happy but I knew of people knew the truth it would never be the same.
As our class moved into the senior cycle of secondary school. Two lads came out and they got off a good reaction off there close friends. They got bullied by people at the start(it was name calling nothing physical) These guys told teachers and the bullies apologised. Since everybody thought I was straight I was included in chats about these guys being mocked. I experienced this from pupils and teachers who sometimes through the odd joke. This really turned me off being gay. Another thing was I had nothing in common with these guys. I was into sport/cars/we had different interests in music/films etc.
When I was in sixth year I started messing around on a chat room one night and I met this guy and we got on well when we were texting. So we decided to meet up. He lived a couple of towns away but we had a lot in common. When I was with him we mainly chatted and had a laugh. We never really got interment with one another. After a few weeks we decided to end things because we knew if anybody found out our lives would change for good and we would loose a lot. At this time I wasn't seeing anyone but I was going out with my friends to clubs/pubs and I found it easy to meet women.
When I started college I said to myself I was going to try and be open about myself and from what I read on the net it said college was going to be open and there was going to be no homophobia and that bullies in secondary were wasters and they had no future. These guys however got high points and are now studying law/medicine at college. During the first few days of college all the societies were trying to get people to join them and I was thinking of joining the L&G one. At the table tough there was two guys and two women and they were all wearing pink and singing and I just said to myself. 'this is not you'. I settled into my course well enough and made friends. It was exactly the same type of people that I was friends with in secondary school. Since their was more girls in the course I found it easy enough to get a girlfriend in college. I actually really liked her and we had a good time together. As the year progressed groups formed and people became close friends. At a class party there was a group of us talking and if we thought was there anybody gay in the class. Everybody agreed about one guy and was unsure about someone else. This guys both came out at different points during the year. Anyway, that night the group was talking about how being gay was wrong/disgusting. These things make it hard to be gay because people will not like you if they know the truth and if they do it might only be an act. The rest of the college year went good for me and I was having a brilliant time. Getting close to the end of first year I noticed my girlfriend was getting very attached so I sort of distanced myself from her and after a few weeks we broke up. We're still very good friends. When college broke for the Summer I was around my home town for the most of the time. During this time a guy came out that was on a local sports team. We wouldn't have known each other very well, I would be good friends with people on the team and would know the guy to have a chat to. When he came out. Everybody was sound to him. Telling him it didn't matter/it was cool. After a few weeks I overheard friends of him saying that they didn't see him as the same anymore and they had stopped asking him on night out ad they also said that most of the lads on the team only pretend to be cool with him to his face to keep him happy. I was looking at this guys facebook page and a couple of years ago he was tagged in loads of photos/places. Since coming out these have become non existent.
The Summer ended and I went back to college. It was the same as before. There was a new girls in our course and she was friendly/bubble. I loved her personality/she was good looking but I simply felt nothing towards her sexually. She also like me and we sort of went out but I said I didn't want anything serious. We just ended up being good friends.
We had a class party close to the end of the year and a few of the girls decided that we all should go to a gay cub before going to the night club. Most of the class went on the gay club and when I got their I didn't feel comfortable and I don't think I would have connected with any of the people their because it was very camp.
I should be in 3rd year now but due to family issues I had to take a year off college. It just something that has to be done and I now I will go back there and finish my course.
I am sorry if I offended anybody with this post.
Any advice.

Dr. Shrike

Your story is the same as this one:

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056984081

Same person?

If you're having these problems I would strongly suggest you attend one of the Boards.ie meet-ups. Many of those who attend them would have faced similar issues and are of a similar age.

I might also consider checking out the Gaybros Reddit page. Some accuse them of being internally-homophobic/femmephobic/heteronormative. I see them as a way to integrate more gay men into a broader gay community, by avoiding the surface level aesthetics of gay stereotypes. That's to say there are no threads giving out about camp gay men, but they're not interested in people posting about Cher's new album

http://www.reddit.com/r/gaybros/

Howsitgoing

Dr. Shrike wrote: »

Your story is the same as this one:

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056984081

Same person?

If you're having these problems I would strongly suggest you attend one of the Boards.ie meet-ups. Many of those who attend them would have faced similar issues and are of a similar age.

I might also consider checking out the Gaybros Reddit page. Some accuse them of being internally-homophobic/femmephobic/heteronormative. I see them as a way to integrate more gay men into a broader gay community, by avoiding the surface level aesthetics of gay stereotypes. That's to say there are no threads giving out about camp gay men, but they're not interested in people posting about Cher's new album

http://www.reddit.com/r/gaybros/

It may or may not be the same person but why do you feel the need to regurgitate old threads. I've seen you do this before countless times and it's always when people seem to have a problem. I'm sure that would only make them switch off further.
I'm not having a go you but maybe you could be a little more tactful in the future instead of inspector relic threads

georgesstreet

Howsitgoing wrote: »

It may or may not be the same person but why do you feel the need to regurgitate old threads. I've seen you do this before countless times and it's always when people seem to have a problem. I'm sure that would only make them switch off further.
I'm not having a go you but maybe you could be a little more tactful in the future instead of inspector relic threads

You seem confused. Howsitgoing didn't regurgitate this thread, unless you consider a thread 7 hours old being replied to as "regurgitating"?

You are having a go at him, and to say "I'm not having a go at you" when you are, is like hurling abuse at someone and then saying "no offence" as if to say "no offence" somehow negates the abuse.

Dr. Shrike

Show me all the times I regurgitated old threads?

Howsitgoing

georgesstreet wrote: »

You seem confused. Howsitgoing didn't regurgitate this thread, unless you consider a thread 7 hours old being replied to as "regurgitating"?

You are having a go at him, and to say "I'm not having a go at you" when you are, is like hurling abuse at someone and then saying "no offence" as if to say "no offence" somehow negates the abuse.

It's pretty obvious you're Doctor S, seeing as you set your account up 9 minutes ago. What you said made no sense and no I won't go searching for instances when you regurgitated old threads because I'm not that sad Dr

Dr. Shrike

There's some EXTREMELY odd activity in this thread. Reported.

georgesstreet

Howsitgoing wrote: »

It's pretty obvious you're Doctor S, seeing as you set your account up 9 minutes ago. What you said made no sense and no I won't go searching for instances when you regurgitated old threads because I'm not that sad Dr

You seem to be the sort of person who likes making accusations, as you again demonstrate here. What is "pretty obvious" to you is of supreme indifference to me and, I suspect, to many others.

Howsitgoing

georgesstreet wrote: »

You seem to be the sort of person who likes making accusations, as you again demonstrate here. What is "pretty obvious" to you is of supreme indifference to me and, I suspect, to many others.

Yes report yourself for having more than one account. Once again what you said made no so sense whatsoever. You had nothing constructive to say so you spoke in riddles to try and appear intelligent when we all know it's quite the contrary. How tragic

L.Jenkins

Ladies and our gentlemen, I wish to inform you all that this thread is being closed for now.