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Fools Errands?

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  • 30-10-2013 12:57pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭


    After pulling an age old prank on an apprentice co worker the other day. I sent him off to a shop with a list and estimated prices beside it to buy a battery powered electric plug, replacement bubble for a spirit level and a glass hammer. As gullible as he was, he actually went off and did it and came back raging cos he made such a fool of himself in the shop. A perfect time to reminisce on what other useless inventions. I can only think of 3 myself at the moment, a tin of tartan paint, rubber nails and a can of amniotic fluid


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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,032 ✭✭✭jem


    stripy paint,
    Skirting board ladder.
    long stand


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭pmy.murphy


    jem wrote: »
    stripy paint,
    Skirting board ladder.
    long stand

    Ah the skirting board ladder, I forgot about that one. Another one is the Inflatable Dartboard, 10 ft of Fallopian tubing, Manually operated Airbag and the left handed bowling ball. The list is endless, Its a brilliant prank to pull on idiots though


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,247 ✭✭✭One shot on kill


    Bucket of steam.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭pmy.murphy


    Reversible Drill is another one


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,255 ✭✭✭Yawns


    Sent a lounge boy out to mop the puddles in the beer garden when it was raining one night. Didn't want customers slipping I told him. He was out there a good few minutes before a lounge girl heard and felt sorry for him.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,247 ✭✭✭pauldla


    Two young recruits sent out for the keys of the square on the last day of FCA summer camp. They were sent from billy to jack for a good hour ("No, I don't have it, go ask the QMS," etc).


  • Registered Users Posts: 261 ✭✭tommyombomb


    Glass hammer is always good


  • Registered Users Posts: 734 ✭✭✭DundalkDuffman


    The 2 I remember were ask for a long stand and get some elbow grease. Not that I fell for either of them or anything! Also remember vaguely someone asking for a leg of fish in a butchers many moons ago.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,510 ✭✭✭dobman88


    Sky hooks,
    Guinness whitener (if working in a bar)
    Keg polish,

    Once told a guy at the end of a shift in a nightclub we had to keep all the bottle caps and send them back with the bottles, he started apologising for throwing them away and off he went to get the caps out of the dirty smelly skips. We forgot bout him until we were all leaving after clean up at about 5.30am. Went to get him and the poor fcuker had 100's of bottles capped. It's the only prank I ever felt bad about.

    We ended up sending the same guy for screw in light bulbs, he flat out refused to go, even when the manager asked him. Would not budge, just went about his work laughing at us saying "screw in light bulbs, haha, ye wont catch me again!". We actually needed them and the guy went bright red when the manager came back with them :) We also asked him to buy a Monday Millions ticket for everyone cos he was heading to the shop anyway and again, he refused. Just shows some people wont trust anything after being caught once.

    Worked on a site a few years ago with a guy who either enjoyed being the joke or he genuinely didn't get it. We caught him for the long stand, level bubble, glass hammer, elbow grease, skirting board ladder, the lot. So one day at the bosses house the boss asked him to put water in the car for the windscreen, it was an old car and didn't have windscreen water. He came into the house 3 or 4 times to fill the jug back up, so we just assumed he was throwing the water away cos he didn't want to get caught.

    I suppose he was sick of getting caught because he actually filled up the oil tank with water!! We still don't know if it was intentional but it was pretty funny at the time. And the boss paid for the damage himself and it put a stop to u pranking this guy.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,163 ✭✭✭ZENER


    I can totally relate to this ! ^^

    When I was a first year apprentice the job sparks sent me to the stores for a "Fish Tape". Thinking I was well clued in I point blank refused asking did he need a "long stand" and a "left handed hammer" as well all the while winking at him.

    The sparks reported me to my supervisor who took me aside and showed me a fish tape, or fish wire as it's more commonly known. Lucky for me he had a sense of humour !!

    Ken


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  • Registered Users Posts: 943 ✭✭✭Enright


    Underwater hair dryer
    Chocolate fire guard

    Radio for a motor bike


  • Registered Users Posts: 943 ✭✭✭Enright


    Reminded me of Kevin Bloody Wilson

    Worth a watch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxtFd-P57BA


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭pmy.murphy


    Lead Balloon
    A Solar Powered Pacemaker
    Waterproof Teabags
    Inflatable Anchor
    Pedal Powered Wheelchair
    Hand Powered Chainsaw
    Powdered Water
    A Nintendo Printer
    Transparent Curtains


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,032 ✭✭✭jem


    dehydrated water tablets


  • Registered Users Posts: 71,799 ✭✭✭✭Ted_YNWA


    Was working in the packaging department in a factory a few years ago making them frozen ready meals.

    One day we were making 5 - bean chilli, I shouted in called one of the girls on the line over & told her to stop production as they were putting more than 5 beans into each one.


  • Registered Users Posts: 947 ✭✭✭fobster


    Worked in a butcher's was sent to get our pudding bender from the other butcher's down the road.


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,008 ✭✭✭uch


    A Leg of Mince

    21/25



  • Registered Users Posts: 898 ✭✭✭petrolcan


    pmy.murphy wrote: »
    replacement bubble for a spirit level and a glass hammer.

    I work in a shop that could sell you these!


  • Registered Users Posts: 898 ✭✭✭petrolcan


    Enright wrote: »

    Radio for a motor bike

    BMW & Honda do these

    :)


  • Moderators, Computer Games Moderators Posts: 3,183 Mod ✭✭✭✭Dr Bob


    pmy.murphy wrote: »
    ...A Nintendo Printer
    ..seems legit..
    180px-Game_Boy_Printer.jpg


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  • Registered Users Posts: 14,739 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    Yawns wrote: »
    Sent a lounge boy out to mop the puddles in the beer garden when it was raining one night. Didn't want customers slipping I told him. He was out there a good few minutes before a lounge girl heard and felt sorry for him.

    I actually squeegee our smoking area when there are puddles even if it's raining...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,241 ✭✭✭✭Kovu


    Sen my ex out for Diet Water one day. He came back looking very pee-d off :D


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,255 ✭✭✭Yawns


    I actually squeegee our smoking area when there are puddles even if it's raining...

    In this case he mopped the entire concrete ground in the extremely large unsheltered part. But carry on, it's only a funny story to tell let's add more ....................


  • Registered Users Posts: 454 ✭✭Kilgore__Trout




    This is how you do it : )


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,602 ✭✭✭Funkfield


    Kovu Murr wrote: »
    Sen my ex out for Diet Water one day. He came back looking very pee-d off :D

    This stuff?
    diet_water_.png


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 987 ✭✭✭The Glass Key


    Used to work in landscaping and garden maintenance and every 2nd Friday during the grass cutting season we'd service all the lawn mowers.

    Everyone did the servicing on "their" machine including changing the oil, new lads were always asked to change the oil in the Flymo (a 2 Stroke engine) and if you left them long enough and came back and asked if they'd changed the oil they would always swear that they had done.

    A really brilliant one happened with the Time Sheets always signed and sent off on a Friday. So this one Friday we had this particularly gullible new lad and one of the older hands told him that he's have to sign his Time Sheet with two crosses because the office might get mixed up with his signature which was one cross.

    Come Monday morning the office rings and wants to know what sort of idiot signs his time sheet with two crosses?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 639 ✭✭✭Shivers26


    One guy I know started working in a hotel bar when he was about 17. On his first day the bar manager told him he was really stuck for something for the bar and would he go to the next pub down the road and give a note to the barman to borrow whatever. He gets to the pub, the barman looks at the note and says 'sorry, can't help you but try X pub down the road', same thing happens again in the next pub.
    On about the 5th pub he looks at the note:
    'It's his first day, send him on to the next pub'


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 987 ✭✭✭The Glass Key


    Shivers26 wrote: »
    One guy I know started working in a hotel bar when he was about 17. On his first day the bar manager told him he was really stuck for something for the bar and would he go to the next pub down the road and give a note to the barman to borrow whatever. He gets to the pub, the barman looks at the note and says 'sorry, can't help you but try X pub down the road', same thing happens again in the next pub.
    On about the 5th pub he looks at the note:
    'It's his first day, send him on to the next pub'

    Similar story I have from a bar manager is that he started to pull a pint and then suddenly stopped exclaiming that this was disastrous and they might have to close be cause the Fallopian Tube was broken. New lad who had heard this was sent off to the next pub up the road to ask for a Fallopian Tube.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,071 ✭✭✭Xenophile


    Many an apprentice in the motor industry was sent with an official written order made out to the local hardware store for a bucket of sparks for the welder.

    The Forum on Spirituality has been closed for years. Please bring it back, there are lots of Spiritual people in Ireland and elsewhere.



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  • Registered Users Posts: 8,998 ✭✭✭893bet


    Shivers26 wrote: »
    One guy I know started working in a hotel bar when he was about 17. On his first day the bar manager told him he was really stuck for something for the bar and would he go to the next pub down the road and give a note to the barman to borrow whatever. He gets to the pub, the barman looks at the note and says 'sorry, can't help you but try X pub down the road', same thing happens again in the next pub.
    On about the 5th pub he looks at the note:
    'It's his first day, send him on to the next pub'

    I doubt you know him rather this is an urban myth tale you heard from someone. Who gets a note and doesnt have a look at it? :P


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