How much to spend on child at xmas

Lola92

Sleepy wrote: »

One thing I am a little worried about is that I know his Dad's girlfriend will probably be spending five or six hundred again on her 3 year old (got him a iPad along with a ton of other stuff last year). Even if we could afford that, we wouldn't be spending it as I feel that's too much (especially considering that due to our family setup and my parents being divorced they get large presents from 4 sets of grandparents!).

Mindful of this here too! Last year my OH's 5 year old got a PS3, Xbox 360, load of games, tablet and a flat screen for the bedroom. We could not and would not go near that amount (or those items!) for a young child, but my OH still feels terrible because his ex can and does outdo him at every opportunity when it comes to treats, gift giving and holidays especially.

We don't generally set a number per child but go by what they have asked for. Our daughter is only turning 3 next month and has Bday and Christmas within 3 weeks of each other. She hasn't asked for anything. Last year she got Lego, books, colours and some clothes, maybe €100, if that. I generally go by 'Something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read'.

clairefontaine

I would not buy a tablet or ipad. My little one was given one as a gift and it is an absolute nightmare to regulate in terms of screen time.

I can see why they have ipad rehab for toddlers now.

Folks do yourselves a big favor and dont spend money on these. And don't let your exs buy them either, unless they are prepared to enforce all the regulation.

RoyalCelt

About 500€ per child which ends up being 2000€. Break the bank stuff I know.

Big Bag of Chips

RoyalCelt wrote: »

About 500€ per child which ends up being 2000€. Break the bank stuff I know.

Just as a matter of interest... Do the kids ask for that amount of stuff, or do you just buy it?

Nothing wrong with it, if you can afford it, but I'd struggle to come up with €500 worth of stuff, especially each, that mine want/would be interested in!

Penny Dreadful

Sleepy wrote: »

We'll be spending about €200 each on the kids between Santa, small presents from us and gifts for each other. Our youngest might come in a fair bit under budget though as everything she's asking Santa for comes to less than €100 (was delighted she asked Santa for Lego!).The eldest (8) really wants a tablet to play games on but thinks they're too expensive to ask Santa for cos the lads in his school were talking about how iPads cost three or four hundred euro. Lucky for him, the Samsung Tab II popped up on Bargain Alerts for a little over £110 stg so Santa's picked it up for him, can't wait to see his face Christmas morning!

One thing I am a little worried about is that I know his Dad's girlfriend will probably be spending five or six hundred again on her 3 year old (got him a iPad along with a ton of other stuff last year). Even if we could afford that, we wouldn't be spending it as I feel that's too much (especially considering that due to our family setup and my parents being divorced they get large presents from 4 sets of grandparents!).

An iPad for a 3 year old?:eek: I bought my husband (who is many many multiples of 3) an iPad last year for Christmas and he thought I was being overly generous.
An iPad is no way suitable as a gift for a 3 year old. They are so young that they are all too likely to throw it to the ground in a fit of temper (as 3 year olds are want to do) and destroy it. They're not going to understand how much it is, how valuable a piece of equipment it is so why give it to them.

Darren 83

I've one child and will probably spend about 400 on her, have been getting one toy each week since September.

Mink

I've a 15mth old and I've always said that we will only ever get one big Santy pressie and they'll get a few stocking fillers (that actually fit in a stocking and cost about the same as the stocking), no present from us as such - this was how my parents did it.

I've always turned my nose up at seeing parents buying loads of presents for their kid, spending big money etc...

....However, now I find I've earmarked at least 10 things in the Smyths catalogue, and he's not even interested in Christmas yet.

On the subject of nieces and nephews, we've 6 to buy for and it's minimally 30-40 euro each (and we spend them same for all their birthdays as well). I've suggested a kris kindle so that each child gets one bigger present from the aunties and uncles but I was shot down as a scrooge.

Moonbeam

30-40 is a lot to spend on 6 of them. I would find that crazy. I would spend 50 on a god child but that is it.

Penny Dreadful

Mink wrote: »

I've a 15mth old and I've always said that we will only ever get one big Santy pressie and they'll get a few stocking fillers (that actually fit in a stocking and cost about the same as the stocking), no present from us as such - this was how my parents did it.

I've always turned my nose up at seeing parents buying loads of presents for their kid, spending big money etc...

....However, now I find I've earmarked at least 10 things in the Smyths catalogue, and he's not even interested in Christmas yet.

On the subject of nieces and nephews, we've 6 to buy for and it's minimally 30-40 euro each (and we spend them same for all their birthdays as well). I've suggested a kris kindle so that each child gets one bigger present from the aunties and uncles but I was shot down as a scrooge.

Its easy to want to buy everything. As its a year when the child isn't even bothered by the fact that its Christmas why not just get them one or two things. You could send the rest to a relief aid project in the Philippines or such. I'm feeling very lucky this year that I live in Ireland, our bad weather isn't a patch on what other people have to suffer and so I'm going to donate some money from my Christmas fund in that direction.

KK is the way to go. My sisters have 6 kids between them and each child gets one present from all of its auntie and uncle on my side of the family. Its not exactly KK but a version thereof where we pool our money (4 sisters 1 brother) and then divide it out according to how many people we have to buy for i.e. everyone gets one present that comes from everyone else.
It cuts down on the shopping time, you put into the pot what you can afford and naturally less is spent on the kids presents than on my parents or the other grown ups.

Sleepy

Penny Dreadful wrote: »

An iPad for a 3 year old?:eek: I bought my husband (who is many many multiples of 3) an iPad last year for Christmas and he thought I was being overly generous.
An iPad is no way suitable as a gift for a 3 year old. They are so young that they are all too likely to throw it to the ground in a fit of temper (as 3 year olds are want to do) and destroy it. They're not going to understand how much it is, how valuable a piece of equipment it is so why give it to them.

Yep, my thoughts too. It's wasted on him but tbh, it's not just Christmas that sees her spoiling him with material things yet failing him in so many others... He only knows "please" and "thank you" because my wife minds him occasionally (though they disappear as soon as his mother's around). I really wish there was some tactful way to suggest a parenting course because she's clearly ruining the child.

clairefontaine wrote: »

I would not buy a tablet or ipad. My little one was given one as a gift and it is an absolute nightmare to regulate in terms of screen time.

I can see why they have ipad rehab for toddlers now.

Folks do yourselves a big favor and dont spend money on these. And don't let your exs buy them either, unless they are prepared to enforce all the regulation.

What age was your little one when he/she got one? We're getting one for our 8 year old but he's used to the concept of limited time on things from already a Wii which he gets an hour a day on (unless it's too wet to go outside and then he might get a second hour, tops).

Lola92 wrote: »

Mindful of this here too! Last year my OH's 5 year old got a PS3, Xbox 360, load of games, tablet and a flat screen for the bedroom. We could not and would not go near that amount (or those items!) for a young child, but my OH still feels terrible because his ex can and does outdo him at every opportunity when it comes to treats, gift giving and holidays especially.

We don't generally set a number per child but go by what they have asked for. Our daughter is only turning 3 next month and has Bday and Christmas within 3 weeks of each other. She hasn't asked for anything. Last year she got Lego, books, colours and some clothes, maybe €100, if that. I generally go by 'Something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read'.

That's flippin' mental stuff, terrible parenting to give all of that in one go imho.

Just bolded you're bit about books because as Uncle Gaybo used to say on every Toy Show, the gift of reading really is the best thing you can give a child!

Penny Dreadful

Moonbeam wrote: »

30-40 is a lot to spend on 6 of them. I would find that crazy. I would spend 50 on a god child but that is it.

I always refused point blank to get into the cycle of spending more on god children than other nieces/nephews. I love them all the same and don't want to spend more on one just for the sake of it.
For big life events e.g. First Communion, Confirmation, 16th, 18th and 21st birthdays I have done/ will go the extra mile.

Moonbeam

we have no nieces and nephews and he has 1 god child.
I can not wait to have nieces and nephews someday and if I do I will try to be practical with presents while they are small.

clairefontaine

Sleepy wrote: »

What age was your little one when he/she got one? We're getting one for our 8 year old but he's used to the concept of limited time on things from already a Wii which he gets an hour a day on (unless it's too wet to go outside and then he might get a second hour, tops).

In that case maybe it wont be such a pain to regulate if he is eight. I secretly wish the one in this house would fall into a river. Good for long car journeys though, but he has figured out the password [six years old] and how to cast things onto chromecast onto the tv and now working on how to upload his cartoon movies that he has made onto youtube. I regularly have to go into the apps, delete delete delete delete delete delete... you get my drift.

If you are a tech savvy parent, maybe this is not a bother for you, but if you are not, then it becomes quite a challenging hassle to negotiate the security aspect of this.

Peer influence will also infiltrate your house, when he has peers in school obsessed with minecraft and everything they do, from story making to spelling is all references to minecraft, and you have no clue what the hell this is.

Then of course the removal process of nearly having to call in the surgeon to have them surgically separated from it when the time allotted is over or its time to do something else. Melt down central.

Where is my ipad? Where is my ipad? Where is my ipad? Repeat....

Maybe Santa will give mommy a big present and take it away!!! :P

Don't get me wrong, it has its plus sides, you just have to wonder if it's worth the costs that come with it.

Oh yeah forgot this part.... can I have an itunes card? EVERYTIME YOU ENTER A SHOP. Look mommy they have itunes cards....and of course when they accidentally delete their favorite app and want to buy it again..

liliq

Mink wrote: »

On the subject of nieces and nephews, we've 6 to buy for and it's minimally 30-40 euro each (and we spend them same for all their birthdays as well). I've suggested a kris kindle so that each child gets one bigger present from the aunties and uncles but I was shot down as a scrooge.

That would do my head in!
Thankfully I've only 2 nieces and 1 nephew. The 2 older ones, myself and their mums have agreed on a €20 max and have given a few suggestions of there's something that would be valued (books, puzzles & bath toys were suggested by their mammies and are decent presents IMO). The third is only a brand new baby so I don't mind spending a bit more on something that will be practical.

Not sure if I posted already, but we're limiting to €150 max on our 2 year old. Even that is too much I think, but the 'big' present should last a few years.

RoyalCelt

Big Bag of Chips wrote: »

Just as a matter of interest... Do the kids ask for that amount of stuff, or do you just buy it?

Nothing wrong with it, if you can afford it, but I'd struggle to come up with €500 worth of stuff, especially each, that mine want/would be interested in!

yes they ask for most of the stuff and are mostly at the age where they want things like ipad's and ps4's.

i can afford to do it by buying them less throughout the year. i find they appreciate it more at xmas they any other time except their birthdays.

Sleepy

clairefontaine wrote: »

Oh yeah forgot this part.... can I have an itunes card? EVERYTIME YOU ENTER A SHOP. Look mommy they have itunes cards....and of course when they accidentally delete their favorite app and want to buy it again..

Based on my experience of my iPhone, once you've paid for an app on iTunes once, you don't need to pay to download it again. Luckily our lads one will be an android device so less marketing to avoid.

Luckily I'm working in IT so I shouldn't have much trouble with the security features (and locking it out of our home wifi to prevent internet access). While I'm sure I can figure it all out, I'm beginning to think a talk for the parents at our kids school regarding the safety precautions one can take with mobiles / tablets might be a good idea. Come to think of it, providing child internet safety services could be a nice little nixer for the local tech savvy teenagers!

clairefontaine

Sleepy wrote: »

Based on my experience of my iPhone, once you've paid for an app on iTunes once, you don't need to pay to download it again. Luckily our lads one will be an android device so less marketing to avoid.

Luckily I'm working in IT so I shouldn't have much trouble with the security features (and locking it out of our home wifi to prevent internet access). While I'm sure I can figure it all out, I'm beginning to think a talk for the parents at our kids school regarding the safety precautions one can take with mobiles / tablets might be a good idea. Come to think of it, providing child internet safety services could be a nice little nixer for the local tech savvy teenagers!

That's a really good idea, should be part of parenting classes for sure. The kids get computer science in school too, and ipads are very soon to become pervasive. But it's going so fast, the parents might not be keeping up. Theres definitely a need for it, specially for teen parents. At six they are being taught how to get onto the internet, etc. luckily the teacher is convincing he kids to design their own apps so they don't spend their allowances on other people's apps.

The security is one part of it, the other part is the regulation. And when hey use their technology to record your conversations when ou have no idea.:o

we'llallhavetea

I go mental at Xmas, have spent over a grand on my daughter before. she's never acts spoiled EVER so I have no qualms buying her everything I can it's just getting harder because she has everything she wants!

lukesmom

aya startin wha wrote: »

I go mental at Xmas, have spent over a grand on my daughter before. she's never acts spoiled EVER so I have no qualms buying her everything I can it's just getting harder because she has everything she wants!

A grand! How old is your daughter? Fair play if you can afford it

we'llallhavetea

lukesmom wrote: »

A grand! How old is your daughter? Fair play if you can afford it

she's nine now, yeah I dunno how I manage it but I pull it from somewhere every year!

lukesmom

aya startin wha wrote: »

she's nine now, yeah I dunno how I manage it but I pull it from somewhere every year!

Lucky girl

Penny Dreadful

aya startin wha wrote: »

she's nine now, yeah I dunno how I manage it but I pull it from somewhere every year!

Apologies if I'm prying and tell me to mind my own business, how do you find €1000 worth of stuff every year that a 9 year old (or younger as she has been) would like and is worth spending the money on? There are only so many tvs, iPods, iPads, bikes, etc that you can buy one child.

Chattastrophe!

Even if I could afford it, I can't ever see myself spending that much on one child! For one thing, I'd hate for them to be getting far more than their friends. Doesn't seem fair or right ... I don't know, it just wouldn't sit right with me.

Besides, in my opinion it's perfectly possible to get kids great gifts that they'll love for a very modest amount of money. If I had €1,000 spare a year, I'd probably spend a fraction of it on gifts, and put the majority in an account to keep it safe for the kid's future (you never know how your circumstances might change in a few years.)

Sleepy

I'd agree, a grand is a ludicrous amount to spend on a child at Christmas imo. What kind of expectations will she have when she's older? That a car will just magically appear in the driveway?

Even €500 would be bordering on excessive imo. Why not save the money and put it towards a holiday, a college fund or something more worthwhile / less likely to make your child materialistic or spoiled?

wolfpawnat

I myself see it as a lot, mainly because I cannot think of a list that could ever come to that, for the whole house. That said, I don't I (or anyone else) has the right to make judgement on a family that does spend that, unless it is beyond their means of course!

Penny Dreadful

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I myself see it as a lot, mainly because I cannot think of a list that could ever come to that, for the whole house. That said, I don't I (or anyone else) has the right to make judgement on a family that does spend that, unless it is beyond their means of course!

I wasn't making a judgement I'm genuinely wondering what you could find as a worthwhile set of gifts for a child of 9 (or younger) that would cost €1000.00

If you want to buy your child a new bike, tablet, games console, tablet, whatever each and every year and you can afford it then well and good. That is (as you said) your own business and is no skin off my nose. I was just wondering.

wolfpawnat

Penny Dreadful wrote: »

I wasn't making a judgement I'm genuinely wondering what you could find as a worthwhile set of gifts for a child of 9 (or younger) that would cost €1000.00

If you want to buy your child a new bike, tablet, games console, tablet, whatever each and every year and you can afford it then well and good. That is (as you said) your own business and is no skin off my nose. I was just wondering.

Oh I know you weren't PD, like you, I cannot think of anywhere near enough toys/gadgets for a 9yo that would ever come to 1000e and am curious to what the child would be getting. I will be spending less than half of that for 2 kids, a godchild, a best friend. my partner, my uncle and my partners mother and sister.

Penny Dreadful

wolfpawnat wrote: »

Oh I know you weren't PD, like you, I cannot think of anywhere near enough toys/gadgets for a 9yo that would ever come to 1000e and am curious to what the child would be getting. I will be spending less than half of that for 2 kids, a godchild, a best friend. my partner, my uncle and my partners mother and sister.

In my family we siblings do a version of KK and always have done. We pool our money (whatever you can afford) and we then buy for parents, siblings, nieces & nephews, inlaws (brothers in law) and one uncle.
This year we will be spending (between 5 of us) €1300.00 on 17 people. The kids get a less expensive gift but something they want and the grown ups get a more expensive one. It works out a treat in terms of not killing you financially.
I couldn't imagine my 9 year old nephew getting almost all of that money spent on just him.
Last year he asked Santa for tarmac for the drive way. He was building a go cart with his friend and they agreed that tarmac would be better than gravel for racing it and as their pocket money wouldn't stretch to tar Santa was the man for the job.

wolfpawnat

Penny Dreadful wrote: »

In my family we siblings do a version of KK and always have done. We pool our money (whatever you can afford) and we then buy for parents, siblings, nieces & nephews, inlaws (brothers in law) and one uncle.
This year we will be spending (between 5 of us) €1300.00 on 17 people. The kids get a less expensive gift but something they want and the grown ups get a more expensive one. It works out a treat in terms of not killing you financially.
I couldn't imagine my 9 year old nephew getting almost all of that money spent on just him.
Last year he asked Santa for tarmac for the drive way. He was building a go cart with his friend and they agreed that tarmac would be better than gravel for racing it and as their pocket money wouldn't stretch to tar Santa was the man for the job.

These are very important things to think about when building a go kart!!!!

My total this year is a bit bigger than last year, but that is because of having a second child.

Son
€135 for bike and helmet. (santa) I have been paying for this weekly.
€16 for a play mat that has roads for his cars(us)
and an Angry Birds app for my ipod. Not sure how much it is, but definitely under a fiver, if not free.

Daughter
A playmat off santa that arrived today from Amazon. €60 in shops got for €30.
A teddy from us. €7

Best Friend/Godmother to my daughter. Lush gift €15

Partner €40 for a helmet worth £90 sterling because I ordered from the US.

Son's godfather a bottle of Benedictine as he is the reason we have a roof over our heads, he is the person we go to when we haven't enough to pay the heating.

OH's sister an owl mug for €7

His mother a bottle of red wine €10.

Total €295. And to me that is enough. We have very little these days, so every penny is precious and I have done all my shopping by shopping around or online. I couldn't spend a grand on gifts if I had a voucher for it and a gun to my head.

we'llallhavetea

hi all, well it's very easy to clock up a grand on presents when there's lots of things to buy! this year is not going to be so easy as she says herself she really has everything. really stumped as to what to buy tbh, but her hello kitty phone went through the wash so I'm hoping she's going to ask santy for a new phone. that will be the big one, other than that I'm just going to get a lot of things for the pony really, clothes, art supplies. they all add up!