Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all! We have been experiencing an issue on site where threads have been missing the latest postings. The platform host Vanilla are working on this issue. A workaround that has been used by some is to navigate back from 1 to 10+ pages to re-sync the thread and this will then show the latest posts. Thanks, Mike.
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Grave Ownership

  • 17-11-2013 11:08pm
    #1
    George1
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭


    ................
    Tagged:


Comments

  • #2
    slimjimmc
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,786 ✭✭✭slimjimmc


    This is not legal advice only my personal opinion. What you've described sounds like criminal damage, you could present your evidence to the Gardaí and let them investigate.


  • #3
    George1
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭George1


    ....................


  • #4
    Timmyctc
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,825 ✭✭✭Timmyctc


    George1 wrote: »
    Thanks for the reply.
    Anyone else with some advice Please all views appreciated

    You could offer to let your brother into the plot a few years pre-mature as a token of "good faith". Or do the above. Best advice you'll get


  • #5
    Dubl07
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,801 ✭✭✭Dubl07


    This happened in the UK. Grieving daughter rigs up CCTV to catch vandal trashing her mother's grave

    It turned out to be her cousin in that case.


  • #6
    Pat Mustard
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,554 ✭✭✭Pat Mustard


    It's a bad situation, George1, but I think that It would be better if this problem could be sorted out without a 'legal' type solution.

    I presume that you are fairly sure about this, as it may not go down too well with your brother if he is not the guilty party.

    I would have to agree that you could make a complaint to Gardai, if it comes to that.

    Personally, in relation to a family member, I'd be extremely reluctant to do that. However badly family members may behave at times, they're still your family. Family feuds can become awfully bitter, and they can sometimes last for generations.

    Maybe you or some other family member can go and meet your brother, take him aside, and try to get through to him.


  • Advertisement
  • #7
    George1
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭George1


    .......................


  • #8
    Joey99
    Registered Users Posts: 53 ✭✭Joey99


    Hi,

    I'm a solicitor but I can't offer you specific legal advice because I don't have all the information I would need. Therefore you can act (or not act) on my suggestions at your own risk.

    In summary, I think your earlier responders have given you the best advice you're going to get.

    1. Getting the Garda involved (assuming you are right about who is doing the damage) is probably the most sure-fire way to handle this situation (in terms of stopping the problem behaviour). They should be able to explain to him, in terms he will understand, the implications of continuing to cause criminal damage to the headstone. This will cost you no money but you will need to be able to establish your case to the satisfaction of the Garda and if you are mistaken you may be defaming your brother. You may also attract personal attacks from him if he believes you have reported him to the police and caused him problems (not rational but your description is not of a person behaving rationally).

    2. He is still your brother and the fact he is defacing his parent's headstone does not seem like very normal behaviour. He might need some help (although I get the sense you may not want to be the one to give it). You say he feels he 'has a right to what's written' on the headstone. Maybe you could add an inscription to reflect his contribution (if you agree he made one)? Or maybe you could change the inscription? These seem like better alternatives than reporting your brother to the police IMHO.

    3. You could take a civil action against him either to get an order to prevent him from damaging the headstone in future or to compensate you for the loss caused by his actions. The first order will ultimately end up in the Garda being asked to enforce the court order if he is found in contempt. This is effectively a really time-consuming and costly way of getting to option #1 above. The second order might get you a money judgement against your brother but will also be time-consuming and expensive. Oh, and would you really want to hire the Sheriff to go and execute against your brother's goods if he didn't pay?

    I hope this helps. It sounds like a difficult and upsetting situation but hopefully you can make something better come out of it.


  • #9
    George1
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭George1


    ......................


  • #10
    Pat Mustard
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,554 ✭✭✭Pat Mustard


    George1 wrote: »
    Can you confirm to me if I am the legal owner of the grave and that they have no Legal rights to it.

    There is no way that anybody could confirm any degree of ownership of land accurately, without checking the relevant deeds/papers. In any case, I would think that the forum charter is an issue here, in that if anybody attempts to answer that question, they are risking a ban.


Advertisement