Liveline Thread 07/01/14 to 26/03/14

dulpit

As an asthmatic could I get some relief too?

Dan Jaman

I've got a terrible pain in my bum, Joe.
<turns radio off>

Jeez, that's cured it!
It's a miracle!

sudzs

signostic wrote: »

i have haemochromatosis, a condition that fortunately is easily managed, my bank a/c number is.... and my pin is........

Wow, were you sick for long before being diagnosed? I know a guy who died, must be 15 years ago though, as no on could diagnose it. Thankfully the docs are more aware of it now.

Roger_007

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Joints are affected by the weather. Cold is incredibly painful. It's (genuinely) one of the reasons older people with arthritis in the US move to sunnier climes like Florida when they retire.

Another reason is golf.:D

ButtersSuki

I want someone to ring in with Ankylosing Spondylitis - it's fave of mine.

bottlebrush

Dan Jaman wrote: »

I've got a terrible pain in my bum, Joe.
<turns radio off>

Jeez, that's cured it!
It's a miracle!

DJ that gave me the best laugh in a long time!

dulpit

I know Joe has researchers (as callers refer to them constantly) but does Joe not listen to them or use them, or is it a deliberate ploy of his to ask his guests the obvious questions?

E.G. Why is Ehlers-Danlos syndrome called that? It's on wikipedia, took me all of 3 seconds to see.

bottlebrush

I couldn't see the smoke alarm with the smoke Joe

signostic

sudzs wrote: »

Wow, were you sick for long before being diagnosed? I know a guy who died, must be 15 years ago though, as no on could diagnose it. Thankfully the docs are more aware of it now.

I was lucky to catch it early before had done any damage, my doctor thought my one of my symptoms reflected anemia but when tested for lack of iron it was discovered that i had 1000 times the normal level. Mostly the condition has symptoms which could be any number of other illnesses.

joi99

I'll be leaving a magnifying mirror close to the radio for the next funny friday.

ButtersSuki

I expect a Public Service announcement on RTE TV and Radio in the next few weeks warning about "The dangers of Magnifying Mirrors". It'll cost about half a mil in fees to create this campaign, and RTE will get loads of advertising revenue for airing them. So a "win-win" in Joe's eyes.

sudzs

You didn't have to dump the mirrors, just put them out of sunlight! :rolleyes:

bottlebrush

Joes new head shops - vanity mirrors

sudzs

signostic wrote: »

I was lucky to catch it early before had done any damage, my doctor thought my one of my symptoms reflected anemia but when tested for lack of iron it was discovered that i had 1000 times the normal level. Mostly the condition has symptoms which could be any number of other illnesses.

Very lucky. Good luck with it!

artful_codger

Human transformers.

lucylu

sudzs wrote: »

You didn't have to dump the mirrors, just put them out of sunlight! :rolleyes:

I agree 7 years bad luck if you break the mirrors when you dump them

Roger_007

ButtersSuki wrote: »

I expect a Public Service announcement on RTE TV and Radio in the next few weeks warning about "The dangers of Magnifying Mirrors". It'll cost about half a mil in fees to create this campaign, and RTE will get loads of advertising revenue for airing them. So a "win-win" in Joe's eyes.

The gubberment will have to set up a quango to regulate these dangerous objects.

signostic

ButtersSuki wrote: »

I expect a Public Service announcement on RTE TV and Radio in the next few weeks warning about "The dangers of Magnifying Mirrors". It'll cost about half a mil in fees to create this campaign, and RTE will get loads of advertising revenue for airing them. So a "win-win" in Joe's eyes.

number 1 danger - they make things look bigger in the bedroom than they actually are...

Dan Jaman

signostic wrote: »

number 1 danger - they make things look bigger in the bedroom than they actually are...

Most guys don't need a mirror for that trick.

dulpit

What was Joe talking about that Liam/LTM/The Warrior/etc?

Prime example of why Joe is worth all of the money he earns, can't get a structured sentence out to advise people of something.

Dublin_Mom

lets hope Joe has now wrung as much as he can out of the LTM (warrior etc ) story...

ButtersSuki

Dan Jaman wrote: »

Most guys don't need a mirror for that trick.

How do you know Dan?

Dan Jaman

ButtersSuki wrote: »

How do you know Dan?

I'm afraid it's built into every male psyche - part of the illusion/delusion we all/most have.
Let's put it this way - I didn't need an E-type, I bought one to complement my enormous dong.

Roger_007

dulpit wrote: »

What was Joe talking about that Liam/LTM/The Warrior/etc?

Prime example of why Joe is worth all of the money he earns, can't get a structured sentence out to advise people of something.

I just saw LTW on the RTE news. All is revealed. Surely this is JDs love child.

neris

snubbleste wrote: »

Joe photobombs a pole

Is he wearing a cravat?

shockwave

neris wrote: »

Is he wearing a cravat?

Of course he is, doesnt everyone from ballyfermot wear them?

Dan Jaman

shockwave wrote: »

Of course he is, doesnt everyone from ballyfermot wear them?

George Melly, he ain't.

signostic

Dan Jaman wrote: »

George Melly, he ain't.

a bit of George....

ButtersSuki

neris wrote: »

Is he wearing a cravat?

Indeed he is. Joseph is quite fond of them and can often be seen in the social pages of the Dubalin papers and indeed laydeez magazines sporting his latest accessory at some opening or another to which he's been invited along with the rest of the great and the good. I suspect it's a nod to the sartorial elegance of his Uncle Gaybo.

Joesph is also often spotted with loud and garish scarves completely unopened and balanced on his shoulders and chest in the same way a catholic priest would wear a stole. This I suspect is his attempt to look regal, holy, distinctly upper class or most likely a combination of all of the above.

He is quite a sight in person.

CountyHurler

Did I miss much over the last few days? This damned job is getting in the way, I may have to pack it in.

neris wrote: »

Is he wearing a cravat?

The three piece Louise Copeland, complete with hat and cravat.. The clothes of de wurking man champagne socialist..

neris

shockwave wrote: »

Of course he is, doesnt everyone from ballyfermot wear them?

Its along way from cravats and wide brimmed hats duffy was reared

ButtersSuki

shockwave wrote: »

Of course he is, doesnt everyone from ballyfermot wear them?

Yes, but usually residents of Ballyer wear them just below their eyes for the purposes of disguising their face whilst committing armed robberies.

bottlebrush

Given the litter topic of the past few days i decided to pick up a small bag of rubbish which was thrown on a grass area near me and which i am tired looking at on my daily walk. Being curious i took at it with a tongs and lo and behold there is a receipt in the bag with the name and address of somebody from a nearby housing estate. I am in a dilemma - should i ring the litter warden or should i ring Joe?

IvyTheTerrible

bottlebrush wrote: »

Given the litter topic of the past few days i decided to pick up a small bag of rubbish which was thrown on a grass area near me and which i am tired looking at on my daily walk. Being curious i took at it with a tongs and lo and behold there is a receipt in the bag with the name and address of somebody from a nearby housing estate. I am in a dilemma - should i ring the litter warden or should i ring Joe?

Have you learned nothing from listening to Liveline?
Your house may be burning down, your children gravely ill, you're a victim of crime: ALWAYS CALL JOE FIRST!

bottlebrush

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

Have you learned nothing from listening to Liveline?
Your house may be burning down, your children gravely ill, you're a victim of crime: ALWAYS CALL JOE FIRST!

Well put it this way, such is the nature of the housing estate where the person lives, it they ever found out i reported them, my house will be burning down.

ButtersSuki

bottlebrush wrote: »

Given the litter topic of the past few days i decided to pick up a small bag of rubbish which was thrown on a grass area near me and which i am tired looking at on my daily walk. Being curious i took at it with a tongs and lo and behold there is a receipt in the bag with the name and address of somebody from a nearby housing estate. I am in a dilemma - should i ring the litter warden or should i ring Joe?

That depends bottle, is it Joe's litter? Now that would be a Lahn Lahn call! :rolleyes:

ButtersSuki

bottlebrush wrote: »

Well put it this way, such is the nature of the housing estate where the person lives, it they ever found out i reported them, my house will be burning down.

It is definitely Duffy's litter then!

bottlebrush

ButtersSuki wrote: »

It is definitely Duffy's litter then!

Anything to get the fire brigade out.,

Dan Jaman

bottlebrush wrote: »

Well put it this way, such is the nature of the housing estate where the person lives, it they ever found out i reported them, my house will be burning down.

I have a twinge of sympathy for those who cop a fine for absent-mindedly drop a fag butt or a theatre ticket and get pounced on, but durty durty baastards who dump in the backroads need to be clobbered and hard. It's the only time I'd turn informer, so strongly do I feel about it.
It might be possible to seed a phone call to the local litter warden with a pointer to the booty and the info there's a link to the perpetrator inside it.
Simply give a false name and use a number-block phone.

vicwatson

Ha ha

bottlebrush

Dan Jaman wrote: »

I have a twinge of sympathy for those who cop a fine for absent-mindedly drop a fag butt or a theatre ticket and get pounced on, but durty durty baastards who dump in the backroads need to be clobbered and hard. It's the only time I'd turn informer, so strongly do I feel about it.

It might be possible to seed a phone call to the local litter warden with a pointer to the booty and the info there's a link to the perpetrator inside it.
Simply give a false name and use a number-block phone.

Yes and the bag i found wasn't something thrown in an absent minded moment. Most likely thrown from a car as it was right beside the road and while there were some take away packaging in it there was also some household waste in it which you wouldn't typically be carrying around in a car so it seems like a deliberate act. For the moment i have thrown the bag in my own bin which goes without saying i have to pay for but i am thinking seriously of taking it back out and reporting it.

ThisRegard

Dan Jaman wrote: »

I have a twinge of sympathy for those who cop a fine for absent-mindedly drop a fag butt

You don't absent mindedly drop a fag butt, you do it intentionally. Smokers are by far the biggest litter bugs in the country.

ButtersSuki

Dan Jaman wrote: »

I have a twinge of sympathy for those who cop a fine for absent-mindedly drop a fag butt or a theatre ticket and get pounced on, but durty durty baastards who dump in the backroads need to be clobbered and hard. It's the only time I'd turn informer, so strongly do I feel about it.
It might be possible to seed a phone call to the local litter warden with a pointer to the booty and the info there's a link to the perpetrator inside it.
Simply give a false name and use a number-block phone.

After reading that, all I could think of was this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StlMdNcvCJo

22 years old this year :eek::eek:

dulpit

ThisRegard wrote: »

You don't absent mindedly drop a fag butt, you do it intentionally. Smokers are by far the biggest litter bugs in the country.

This.

CarrickMcJoe

bottlebrush wrote: »

Yes and the bag i found wasn't something thrown in an absent minded moment. Most likely thrown from a car as it was right beside the road and while there were some take away packaging in it there was also some household waste in it which you wouldn't typically be carrying around in a car so it seems like a deliberate act. For the moment i have thrown the bag in my own bin which goes without saying i have to pay for but i am thinking seriously of taking it back out and reporting it.

Personally, I'd report it, you'll find a bag will be dumped again during the week (maybe no reciept). Just as long as it's not a reciept for their childs medicine, or on to Joe they'll go.. "Joe, me chillizer got a fine in the post".

bottlebrush

CarrickMcJoe wrote: »

Personally, I'd report it, you'll find a bag will be dumped again during the week (maybe no reciept). Just as long as it's not a reciept for their childs medicine, or on to Joe they'll go.. "Joe, me chillizer got a fine in the post".

That's bizarre. It IS actually a receipt for children's medicine. Think ill let it go.

ButtersSuki

bottlebrush wrote: »

That's bizarre. It IS actually a receipt for children's medicine. Think ill let it go.

I think we have a confession!

bottlebrush

ButtersSuki wrote: »

I think we have a confession!

Yes Carrick . . . Can you account for your movements in the last week. . . !

ButtersSuki

EDS again.

This woman's child was mentioned yesterday. So the researchers were busy after the show yesterday trying to hunt her down.

shockwave

I wonder does he wear the cravat to work.