What's your cooking confession?

ElleEm

the beer revolu wrote: »

I can rarely be arsed making a dessert - even when we have people around.

I could happily ONLY make desserts. I love to cook, and will often plan a meal by deciding what dessert I will do first.

Senecio

I use one of these for all my roasts. It has never failed.

http://www.bbqtalk.co.uk/weber-style-digital-talking-thermometer

I feel like a cheat but I'd rather that than dry, over cooked meat.

gg2

Cannot boil potatoes for the life of me. Always shout for someone to see if they are cooked.

Markcheese

Pang wrote: »

I can't poach an egg in just water. I have tried so many times and failed. I've looked up all the so called tricks and still nothing.

I finally gave in a few months back and just bought a poaching pan.:(

Now that you have a poaching pan you can try the real way and succeed...(leaving your expensive pan to clutter )
Barely boil the water in a 1/3 to 1/2 full pot(not pan) add a splash of vinegar (nothing too colourful) bring hear down a tad so water is barely moving ...
Now crack a fresh egg (they go watery in fridge) and open it just above the water(ie don't drop from a height ) . Get your slotted spoon and if necessary
gather the white a bit... Remove onto a bit of kitchen paper.. Then onto your toast...start with 1 egg .. In no time you'll flying it ....

Markcheese

The Sweeper wrote: »

I can't make mayonnaise. It never emulsifies. It just splits and I end up with split eggy looking oil. I've wasted more eggs and oil than I care to admit. Every time I have leftover egg yolks from a recipe I try it, and every single goddamn time I fail. I try a different way every time too, so it's not repeatedly trying the wrong recipe. Mayo failo. That's me.

2 good cheats a friend gave me , one before you start drizzling in the oil stick in a dab of mustard then beat the crap out of it and start drizzling the oil in .. Or two while you're whisking the yolks add some very hot water , oil goes in easier,
And it's easier with a stand mixer
That said I haven't made Mayo in years

johnnyskeleton

I put whiskey and cinnamon in a lot of food (not just deserts, main courses!) partially because it tastes nice but also to see if anyone notices!

In re: poaching an egg, crack the egg into a cup or glass, then slide it into boiling water as quickly as you can. Small pans, vinegar, barely boiling etc are mostly irrelevant.

Princess Peach

I could watch cooking shows all day long, have probably spent hundreds of hours watching them over the years but I'd say I've cooked something I've seen on a show maybe twice in my life if at all.

Merkin

I'm pretty good with eggs but can not master how to do an egg in a microwave. We don't have one at home but I have breakfast at work and so far my attempts at cooking an egg in a cup has resulted in exploding egg which invariably makes a loud bang and results in remnants of sad and pulverized egg flying east and west.

Padraig Mor

Faith wrote: »

Mine is that I never make gravies or sauces from scratch . I'll make a gorgeous roast dinner and serve it with Bisto, or do fillet steak with packet pepper sauce. I just never bothered to learn how to make them properly, and actually if I was ever do a cooking course, I'd want to do one on sauces.

A bit like me (although I'm not too bad for sauces) - I usually go 75% of the way to a great homemade dinner, but not quite all the way. So I'll do some lovely rare fillet steaks with fried mushrooms and onions topped with a homemade pepper and Armagnac sauce.......and put Aldi oven chips on the side. Or maybe some juicy lamb fillets with some cheesy potato gratin and a rich balsamic reduction sauce......served with packet frozen vegetables fired into a pot for a few minutes.


Also, I'm ok with most of the 'egg woes' on this thread - I can poach 'em, boil 'em, fry 'em or scramble 'em................but for the life of me, I cannot make a simple fecking omelette!

OldNotWIse

I put butter in pretty much everything. People are always raving about how good my food tastes - they have no idea that every portion takes a week off their lives :pac:

Dolbert

OldNotWIse wrote: »

I put butter in pretty much everything. People are always raving about how good my food tastes - they have no idea that every portion takes a week off their lives :pac:

Butter isn't bad for you! It's margarine you need to avoid, as it's essentially edible plastic. Even the Daily Mail agrees so it must be true.

kylith

dee_mc wrote: »

I'm another failure at poaching eggs! I've resorted to using the little 'poachie' pouch things, not the same but at least I end up with a soft yolk and don't lose all the white like I do whenever I try to cook them properly!
I've tried using a drop of vinegar and it does improve matters slightly but I can detect the vinegar taste and I hate it

I got those poachie things too, they're a lifesaver! I'm glad to hear that so many others have problems poaching eggs.

hattoncracker wrote: »

I can't make mashed potato properly...

I don't know what it is! But it just never turns out correctly! I think I need to read up on boiling potatoes correctly!

Me too! I can just never get it right; it's always lumpy, even when it's gloopy.

Merkin wrote: »

I'm pretty good with eggs but can not master how to do an egg in a microwave. We don't have one at home but I have breakfast at work and so far my attempts at cooking an egg in a cup has resulted in exploding egg which invariably makes a loud bang and results in remnants of sad and pulverized egg flying east and west.

You have to pierce the yolk. That should stop it exploding.

OldNotWIse wrote: »

I put butter in pretty much everything. People are always raving about how good my food tastes - they have no idea that every portion takes a week off their lives :pac:

Have you tried a knob of butter in baked beans? It's lush, just don't tell my OH I do it!

OldNotWIse

Dolbert wrote: »

Butter isn't bad for you! It's margarine you need to avoid, as it's essentially edible plastic. Even the Daily Mail agrees so it must be true.

Well if the Daily Mail says so... :pac: I know butter is better than margarine, I wouldnt let the latter past my door tbh, but if you saw the amounts I use... :P

OldNotWIse

kylith wrote: »

I got those poachie things too, they're a lifesaver! I'm glad to hear that so many others have problems poaching eggs.

Me too! I can just never get it right; it's always lumpy, even when it's gloopy.

You have to pierce the yolk. That should stop it exploding.


Have you tried a knob of butter in baked beans? It's lush, just don't tell my OH I do it!

lol, one of the few things I dont (yet) put butter in MY OH puts tomato sauce and mayonaise on loads of stuff, and salt on tomatoes. I used to think it was weird but now I couldn't imagine eating a pizza without both on top :eek:

Lovely Bloke

A lot of people have trouble with mashed spuds. I read a tip about 2 years ago, and now make great mashers all the time.

1. dry them off, drain them and stick them back on the heat for a couple of minutes, making sure they don't burn
2. mash them dry, get them well broken up and fluffy, then, and only then, add the butter
3. for proper mashers you need the same amount of butter as potato

OldNotWIse

Baldy Conscience wrote: »

A lot of people have trouble with mashed spuds. I read a tip about 2 years ago, and now make great mashers all the time.

1. dry them off, drain them and stick them back on the heat for a couple of minutes, making sure they don't burn
2. mash them dry, get them well broken up and fluffy, then, and only then, add the butter
3. for proper mashers you need the same amount of butter as potato

Malari

I'm pretty good in the kitchen and have lots of techniques and will attempt most things at least once (twice if they are successful ) but I freeze in terror if I have to cook a steak. I can just NEVER tell what it'll be like on the inside without cutting it.

thegreatiam

Malari wrote: »

I'm pretty good in the kitchen and have lots of techniques and will attempt most things at least once (twice if they are successful ) but I freeze in terror if I have to cook a steak. I can just NEVER tell what it'll be like on the inside without cutting it.

Do you know how to tell?

With your left hand hold your first finger and thumb together, like you are making the ok sign with your hand.

now with your right index finger poke the base of your thumb. It will be soft and easy to press in.
This is medium rare.
Poke a rare steak with your finger and it will have the same feel to it, soft and squidgy.

now move your left thumb to your left middle and poke, it's slightly firmer. this is medium.

now the ring finger and then the little finger, each finger will make the muscle at the base of your thumb tighter. As a steak cooks more it will get tighter.

so to determine how a steak is cooked poke it with your finger, then poke your thumb base and gauge which is closest.




If it gets past the middle finger give it to the dog

Malari

Yes, thegreatiam, I have heard of that technique before, I was not looking for advice, I just find it so vague as to be useless to me and I am resigned to the fact that my boyfriend will just have to do all the steak cooking in our house. Let's face it, I do pretty much everything else!

As much as I poke steak (and I'm sure the steak recipient would not be so delighted with continuous proddings of their food before it gets to their plate) I can't equate it to the feel of that part of my hand.

Loire

Malari wrote: »

I'm pretty good in the kitchen and have lots of techniques and will attempt most things at least once (twice if they are successful ) but I freeze in terror if I have to cook a steak. I can just NEVER tell what it'll be like on the inside without cutting it.

This used to bug me. I now take a scientific approach. I cook my steaks on the BBQ and time exactly how long they cook for. We don't eat steak very often and then we do we eat fillets. We like our steaks medium medium/rare and so for a good, thick fillet I give it 6 minutes on one side and 4 minutes on the other side. Obviously barbeques vary and mine is an old, cheap and nasty one and is probably an "Elf & Safety" hazard to boot :eek:

Loire.

thegreatiam

Malari wrote: »

Yes, thegreatiam, I have heard of that technique before, I was not looking for advice, I just find it so vague as to be useless to me and I am resigned to the fact that my boyfriend will just have to do all the steak cooking in our house. Let's face it, I do pretty much everything else!

As much as I poke steak (and I'm sure the steak recipient would not be so delighted with continuous proddings of their food before it gets to their plate) I can't equate it to the feel of that part of my hand.

Are you pressing with your left hand? you dont need to press your thumb into your finger, just gently touch them together.

Either way, raw meat is soft, cooked meat is not. you dont need to equate it to a part of your hand if you dont want to.

I assume you have clean hands when cooking so touching with you fingers shouldn't be a problem. Personally I use my tongs.

other than that it's just practice.

My biggie is omelets, no matter what I do I can't seem to get a good omelet cooked.

I've managed to get it down from 75% of all attempts are horrific road crashes to around 40% of all attempts are a big mess but edible, they taste good but don't look pretty.

Every now and then I get a perfect one and can't bring myself to eat it ;-)

It's all about practice tho.


Edit for steak:

If you really have trouble then you can try a meat thermometer, rare is 50-55 degrees, medium is 60-65 degrees.

homemadecider

Malari wrote: »

Yes, thegreatiam, I have heard of that technique before, I was not looking for advice, I just find it so vague as to be useless to me and I am resigned to the fact that my boyfriend will just have to do all the steak cooking in our house. Let's face it, I do pretty much everything else!

As much as I poke steak (and I'm sure the steak recipient would not be so delighted with continuous proddings of their food before it gets to their plate) I can't equate it to the feel of that part of my hand.

I also find that finger pokey technique to be rubbish. Best thing I ever bought in terms of getting steaks perfect is a meat thermometer.

MissFlitworth

Faith wrote: »

I should add, there's no judgement in this thread! And please only offer advice if someone explicitly asks for it

Just in case any one missed it in Faith's original post, no helpful advice unless someone asks for it. Otherwise the funny will fade away and we'll spend the next few weeks looking at photos of my sad, stringy, wet poached eggs and trying to fix em.

Back on topic - not so much these days because I have pots I am very fond of but I have *on occasion* thrown a pot or baking dish in the bin because I really, really didn't want to wash it. And the less said about the curry sauce bain maries at the end of a bad day back in my burger flipping years the better

Mrs Fox

OldNotWIse wrote: »

:pac: I know butter is better than margarine, I wouldnt let the latter past my door tbh, but if you saw the amounts I use... :P

Mmmm... yeah. Maybe I should confess re butter.
I go through about a whole and a half of the 454g ones a week.:o

Malari

Loire wrote: »

This used to bug me. I now take a scientific approach. I cook my steaks on the BBQ and time exactly how long they cook for. We don't eat steak very often and then we do we eat fillets. We like our steaks medium medium/rare and so for a good, thick fillet I give it 6 minutes on one side and 4 minutes on the other side. Obviously barbeques vary and mine is an old, cheap and nasty one and is probably an "Elf & Safety" hazard to boot :eek:

Loire.

But, they tend to vary in thickness, ah the endless factors.

homemadecider wrote: »

I also find that finger pokey technique to be rubbish. Best thing I ever bought in terms of getting steaks perfect is a meat thermometer.

Meat thermometer is probably a good idea. Anyway, I am not looking for a solution, I have solved the problem = boyfriend cooks :cool:

Elbow

Something always goes wrong when I cook bangers and mash


Under normal circumstance I can make a good gravy, i can make fluffy mashed spuds, i can cook a few sausages without burning the house down and i can heat a saucepan of beans......

However attempt to combine all of the above on a plate and disaster will strike!

kylith

OldNotWIse wrote: »

lol, one of the few things I dont (yet) put butter in MY OH puts tomato sauce and mayonaise on loads of stuff, and salt on tomatoes. I used to think it was weird but now I couldn't imagine eating a pizza without both on top :eek:

Mmmmm, sea salt on fresh tomatoes is one of life's little pleasures.

Merkin

kylith wrote: »

Mmmmm, sea salt on fresh tomatoes is one of life's little pleasures.

Tomatoes CRAVE salt. There is nothing nicer than a caprese salad with a generous helping of olive oil and see salt on top.....nyummy!

Alun

kylith wrote: »

Mmmmm, sea salt on fresh tomatoes is one of life's little pleasures.

.. and don't forget the freshly ground black pepper

OldNotWIse

Mrs Fox wrote: »

Mmmm... yeah. Maybe I should confess re butter.
I go through about a whole and a half of the 454g ones a week.:o

We'd easily go through one. Doesn't sound much?? There's only 2 of us and we dont eat bread!