Dating Agencies

catallus

anewme wrote: »

I registered last week on a free website) POF

Only getting used to the jargon now.

I had over 80 email responses initially from people aged 32 to 56. Averaging about 5 new mails a day since then...

:eek: Jesus Christ!

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

The men on these sites outnumber the women by at least 10 to 1.

anewme

catallus wrote: »

:eek: Jesus Christ!

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

The men on these sites outnumber the women by at least 10 to 1.

Not sure. Reckon the figure is bumped up by the newbies joining in January. Having read some of the responses here, it seemed like a woman aged 45 and single would have little or no responses, glad to say, that does not seem to be what I am experiencing so far.

Now to pluck up the courage to actually go on a date!!!

The Corinthian

Caveat emptor.

countryliving

hello there board members,
i went through all the pages with all your different experiences.
i initially posted this ages ago and seems like these dating agencies are getting away with a huge amount and playing on vunerable people who would geniunely like to meet someone and the price is ridiculous.
yes, i have experienced that guy being aggressive and rude to me.
can i also say i tried the Knock Marriage Bureau and I can assure you board members i am no holy joe! I never go to mass etc. i wish i had spent the 150 euro on something else! but i would like to meet a farmer so that was the reason i went to them. i have only met one and god forgive me he had what we would refer to in the country a 'small want' - very nice but not the sort i would want to date. i don't mean to be horrible!.
luckily whew i am not desperate to meet anyone! but obviously i would definitely like to meet someone.i am very easy going and i kinda fancy a chap at home currently!
anyhow - my advice - i would strongly advise nobody to invest a lot of money in a dating agency - not worth it. hope this helps someone save some money.

anewme

The Corinthian wrote: »

Caveat emptor.

Absolutely!

No flies on me though!

Katgurl

anewme wrote: »

I registered last week on a free website) POF

Only getting used to the jargon now.

I had over 80 email responses initially from people aged 32 to 56. Averaging about 5 new mails a day since then.

Majority in the age group 38-47.

Glad I did not pay for 500 for 5 dates.

Looking forward to going on some dates. Some lovely genuine guys in the mix so watch this space.

Good for you!

I have to say I really like your posts and attitude.

I stopped posting on the thread because it was all becoming obnoxious. There is a definite case to be made for online dating; I know a few people who've met people online. I just got to the stage where I got so sick of always dating and thought "I wish I could send someone else on the first date after responding to all the emails". I still have my profile up just in case someone leaps out at me but I very rarely answer mails anymore.

I had my third Date from the dating agency last week. He was a nice guy. In fairness all the guys have been in the right ballpark it was the agency guy I can't stand. I didn't think there was any chemistry with the other two but that's impossible to predict. The agency guy pi$$ed me right off though because he was not remotely interested in my feedback and if he's not getting feedback how can he possibly make a qualified recommendation? Anyway I'm tied into the contract now so i am continuing on.

I told this guy I'd meet up with him again so you never know, there might be one positive story for the thread.

countryliving

morning Katgurl, good for you...that is super you are meeting a guy from a dating agency a second time. i hope it goes well and i just wish you the best.
you see you cant generalize - i didnt have a great experience with the dating agency i tried but you just never know! you never know the story - it may just work for 1 couple. it is hard to get the chemistry right though that is the key. good luck.

Katgurl

countryliving wrote: »

morning Katgurl, good for you...that is super you are meeting a guy from a dating agency a second time. i hope it goes well and i just wish you the best.
you see you cant generalize - i didnt have a great experience with the dating agency i tried but you just never know! you never know the story - it may just work for 1 couple. it is hard to get the chemistry right though that is the key. good luck.

No, to be honest, I wouldn't recommend going to an agency to any of my friends. I tend to date a lot anyway & am in general, always open to new things so thought I'd give this a bash; nobody I knew personally had gone through an agency, I had the money to spare and I thought at the very least I'd get some interesting stories out of it.

Pros: It's not really 'paying for 5 dates' it's paying for 5 introductions to people who are (theoretically) serious about finding someone for longterm & who €650 isn't a massive amount of money to. That's what sold it to me anyway. As I said, I've met three guys and they were all very mannerly, the right age & looking to meet someone.

Cons: The money is paid upfront and sadly I saw a huge drop in attention from the matchmaker after registration. I would have expected much more interest after each of the dates asking questions such as "what did you do, what was he like, what did you think about him, how would you describe him to somebody else?" etc. Then at least the relationship between client-matchmaker would be improve and assuming I hadn't hit it off with the bloke they would have some information for the next girl "ie. she said he was quite reserved" and then if some other girl said about a date she had been on "he's a bit too outgoing for me" there could be two more introductions lined up. And of course the other way around with the man giving feedback about me.

But sadly none of that took place at all and I have lost all faith in the agency being even vaguely interested in finding suitable matches.

If this guy works out, I think that would be more of a fluke than anything and I still wouldn't be prepared to write a positive online review for the agency because I have found the man in there obnoxious to deal with.

Emme

Katgurl wrote: »

No, to be honest, I wouldn't recommend going to an agency to any of my friends. I tend to date a lot anyway & am in general, always open to new things so thought I'd give this a bash; nobody I knew personally had gone through an agency, I had the money to spare and I thought at the very least I'd get some interesting stories out of it.

Pros: It's not really 'paying for 5 dates' it's paying for 5 introductions to people who are (theoretically) serious about finding someone for longterm & who €650 isn't a massive amount of money to. That's what sold it to me anyway. As I said, I've met three guys and they were all very mannerly, the right age & looking to meet someone.

Cons: The money is paid upfront and sadly I saw a huge drop in attention from the matchmaker after registration. I would have expected much more interest after each of the dates asking questions such as "what did you do, what was he like, what did you think about him, how would you describe him to somebody else?" etc. Then at least the relationship between client-matchmaker would be improve and assuming I hadn't hit it off with the bloke they would have some information for the next girl "ie. she said he was quite reserved" and then if some other girl said about a date she had been on "he's a bit too outgoing for me" there could be two more introductions lined up. And of course the other way around with the man giving feedback about me.

But sadly none of that took place at all and I have lost all faith in the agency being even vaguely interested in finding suitable matches.

If this guy works out, I think that would be more of a fluke than anything and I still wouldn't be prepared to write a positive online review for the agency because I have found the man in there obnoxious to deal with.

Did you get each other's contact details after the date? I wouldn't trust the dating agency to pass on contact details even if you both told them the date went well and you are interested in seeing each other again. It is in a dating agency's interest to keep men on their books for as long as possible, particularly if there is a shortage of single men that age on the agency's books.

Katgurl

Emme wrote: »

Did you get each other's contact details after the date? I wouldn't trust the dating agency to pass on contact details even if you both told them the date went well and you are interested in seeing each other again. It is in a dating agency's interest to keep men on their books for as long as possible, particularly if there is a shortage of single men that age on the agency's books.

Oh yeah the first meeting gets set up after the guy phones the girl so we had each other's details - second date is scheduled for this weekend.

I haven't actually foubd my agency to be wildly unethical or anything and the guys have been fine. I had just expected a more personal service or interest. Apparently the last date was told "yeah... She's grand" and that was it. Pathetic calling that matchmaking, you'd be better off with a randomised function on a dating website.

anewme

Katgurl wrote: »

second date is scheduled for this weekend.

Do let us know how you get on!

IHeartShoes

anewme wrote: »

I registered last week on a free website) POF

Only getting used to the jargon now.

I had over 80 email responses initially from people aged 32 to 56. Averaging about 5 new mails a day since then.

Majority in the age group 38-47.

Glad I did not pay for 500 for 5 dates.

Looking forward to going on some dates. Some lovely genuine guys in the mix so watch this space.

I read most of this thread and was pretty shocked at some of the negativity (and the insults) toward my demographic. However, I wanted to offer my experience as balance. I'm a 45 year old female. Divorced and single since 39. After a couple of years with zero interest in dating as I needed the timeout working out what I wanted and on myself, I got back on the horse. I dated some in real world but joined POF Over 3 years ago. I found it a very positive experience. Huge fun. Both sent and received a lot of mails. Mets lots of great guys. Lots of dates - some dating. Huge interest from younger men. Very young. But happily replied thanks but no thanks. Lots of interest from my own age group. It really is a matter of numbers and some days, yes could be a little frustrating. But I was in no great hurry so really enjoyed the experiences and have some new friends.

Attitude is paramount and I think you will do very well with your sunny, positive attitude. You sound like you have a great sense of humour too which is what I would say is the next requirement.

Anyhoo I met a chap on POF almost a year ago now. Attractive, funny, solvent and 40 and I really could not be happier. A keeper;)

So ignore the naysayers, which I'm pretty sure you are anyway. There is no bleak outlook here or long, lonely road ahead. (I'm no Pollyanna and If this doesn't work out for whatever reason, I know I have survived worse and I'll be just fine:). Since I hit 40 I'm having the best time of my life!

I wish you the very best - you deserve it:)

Tigger99

I had a similar experience Iheartshoes There is a lot of negativity on here, so good to counterbalance it. I'm mid thirties, so not a young thing either.

Smurfasaurus

I paid €400 (the fee is now €450) for a one year membership (which consists of three dates over the period of a year) of one of the well-know dating agencies in Ireland. I can only describe the experience as a complete waste of hard-earned money and a scam. Unfortunately I fell for the 'matchmakers' sales pitch which was very convincing and very much played on the hopes of the singleton.

It was a shambles of a service from the beginning but I guess as I didn't have the time necessary for sifting through online dating sites I had hoped that by paying a significant chunk of cash I would be paying somebody else to do the leg work for me.

I arranged to meet the matchmaker but when I turned up she had sent a man to meet me instead. I was not forewarned and so I was completely taken aback. She cited sickness as the excuse but that is obviously no excuse for not letting me know. The man interviewed me and said there was an 80% success rate and if I wasn't happy with the service, ie it didn't work for me, I could get my money back. He said this had only happened on one occasion. He said he was very confident of a match for me based on the men on the books. The matchmaker herself told me that there were roughly 40 men in my age range. I now know that this was absolutely not the case. She does not have anywhere near the numbers needed to make matches.

I went on 4 dates- one of them I liked but the feeling wasn't mutual. The other three were completely not what I was looking for personality-wise.

At anytime that I suggested that I was becoming doubtful there was suitable men on the books I was fobbed off with the 'trust me this works' line.

I also stated my concern on a number of occasions that I didn't understand how she could 'match make' me when she had sent somebody else to meet me and never actually met me herself.

For the entire year I received a very low level of service. There has been wrong information in my profile from the beginning and when I sent through edits these were not changed so that a few months later when I asked to see my profile again the same wrong profile was being sent.


In my last communication with her she even suggested I date somebody that I had already dated and got his name wrong so I only recognised the similar details in the profile. This was all very shoddy considering the fee paid.

When the year was up and I was nowhere near the relationship I had been promised I emailed asking for a partial refund. I was happy (well not happy really) to pay €150 to cover the cost of my initial interview and the dates set up. She replied that there was no way that there was a money-back guarantee. That was impossible. I replied quoting in writing from her own website which I quote here:

7. If for whatever reason (managing expectations) we are unable to find a suitable match 'company name here' may choose to refund the member less a €150 profiling meeting charge and a charge for dates that have been arranged.

Obviously she had nothing to say to this as it is in black and white on her own website. She also said that it is considered a date if numbers are passed even if the two people never meet. So if after a phone conversation with somebody you realise you are not suited, it is considered as one of your three dates.

Then the communication went dead.

So I am posting this in the hope that nobody else wastes their hard earned money on this shambles of a service and falls for the sales pitch and empty promises of this woman who has been featured on the Ray Darcy show and in newspaper features.

Tigger99

You know I'd be tempted to pursue her through the small claims court. Only a small fee for you and a form, but might make her think twice.

Smurfasaurus

Yeah you're right. I hadn't thought of that. Will check it out. It galls me that she is fleecing people and pouncing on their hopes with no regulation.

The Corinthian

Smurfasaurus wrote: »

The matchmaker herself told me that there were roughly 40 men in my age range. I now know that this was absolutely not the case. She does not have anywhere near the numbers needed to make matches.

Women seeking a partner in their thirties are at a disadvantage. That they're effectively in the home stretch biologically, should they want to start a family, means that men who might qualify have their pick.

This means that very few men in that group need to resort to any service that costs €450, to find someone who wants to form a lasting relationship (casual relationships and hook ups are another matter).

As a result, you're unlikely to find anywhere near as many men genuinely seeking serious relationships using such services, or even free dating sites.

I went on 4 dates- one of them I liked but the feeling wasn't mutual. The other three were completely not what I was looking for personality-wise.

In turn, to what I said above, this means two things: A man who is going to use one of these services has the luxury of being picky - he's not paying €450 to find a match, he's paying €450 to find a match that he otherwise won't find for free, and/or that he cannot find such a match for free in an environment which is frankly like shooting fish in a barrel, suggests deeper problems with said man.

For the entire year I received a very low level of service.

Because, I suspect, these are probably all cowboy operations, and in many cases expect high failure rates but bank on being able to avoid refunds in the majority of cases.

It's like premium SMS services that calculate that out of 1000 people being signed onto the service, 50 will be too lazy to cancel or seek a refund. Same model.

Smurfasaurus wrote: »

Yeah you're right. I hadn't thought of that. Will check it out. It galls me that she is fleecing people and pouncing on their hopes with no regulation.

TBH, as I said earlier, caveat emptor and reading through the site in question it's covered in red flags, so really you can't blame 'no regulation' alone.

Ironically, given I mentioned it above, the woman in question also has a history in premium rate SMS services. Unsurprising, IMHO.

demondoug

Hi i was looking in to joining a Dating Agency but one of the Company's I
Contacted was very Aggressive in his sales approach and you pay a fortune to get only 4 dates which seems very little for so much money, I thought you would get a'lot more dates with in a years membership and I do not know which Dating Agency if any would be suitable for a single male with no ties in his mid 30's ?

Computer91

demondoug wrote: »

Hi i was looking in to joining a Dating Agency but one of the Company's I
Contacted was very Aggressive in his sales approach and you pay a fortune to get only 4 dates which seems very little for so much money, I thought you would get a'lot more dates with in a years membership and I do not know which Dating Agency if any would be suitable for a single male with no ties in his mid 30's ?

Hi there, do not waste your time and money on dating agencies. Read the posts on the thread here. Not one person has anything positive to say about dating agencies, they are legal scam artists ripping off vulnerable people.
I had a horrible experience after I'd paid €500 for 5 dates! The dates were promised to be over the course of roughly a year...meanwhile roughly 2 years later I finally had 5 dates, theses dates only happened after I had to make several phone calls each time requesting the dates and on one occasion I received horrendous verbal abuse on the phone from the agency owner when I tried to discuss with him what I was looking for as there was obviously no thought whatsoever on their part as to a possibility of would we be suitable together. The dates were clearly not arranged with any consideration for our compatibility. It was completely farcical and almost comical if I had not paid €500 for the humiliating experience.
Take my advice and keep your money, go out and have fun and you will meet someone lovely.

demondoug

Thank you for your advice as i used to think you would pay a lot less than what they charge and be on countless dates during the so called 12 month membership and not just limited to four and another well known company i contacted has increased their price from 595 to 695
which seems very excessive.

Regards Doug

iuil1999

€695....that's crazy money!!!
You should join those Meet Up groups. You'll make new friends and hopefully a nice girl too :-)

Emme

iuil1999 wrote: »

€695....that's crazy money!!!
You should join those Meet Up groups. You'll make new friends and hopefully a nice girl too :-)

MeetUp is very good for making new friends but you have to be positive and put the effort in. Not so good for getting together with a new partner. It happens, but not as often as you might think. The good thing about MeetUp is that if you are enjoying it and making new friends after a while getting together with a new partner might not seem as important as it did when you joined first.

Join a MeetUp group because it reflects your interests, not because you think there's a good chance of getting together with somebody.

iuil1999

There are some singles groups on Meet Up too...

cena

aNY SITES like match that are free

SarahMollie

I've only skimmed the first few/last few pages of this thread - seem like there are so many near identical experiences that I just moved ahead.

Sounds like the industry is a scam, but I just wanted to add a +1 for online dating.

I signed up a few years ago, there were a few awful eejits of course (reflective of the population at large!) but I got talking to some seemingly very genuine, nice, fun guys.

There were a few in particular who although seemed lovely, I wasnt getting the spark feeling through the messages, like one guy in particular just seemed too nice and too eager and just agreed with everything I said. My point is that although this lad wasnt for me, I don't doubt he was genuine and would make someone a lovely BF.

After about 2 weeks I ended up going on a date with a guy whos messages I'd liked the best. He wrote well and came across as intelligent and witty. Two and a half years later, we're living together. The first date was obviously a little awkward at first but soon we were chatting like old friends, and then we met again and from that night on, the awkwardness was gone and it was basically a done deal

If i was single all over agian, I'd way rather chance this approach if I wanted to meet people that put myself through something that has all the hallmarks of a scam.

Give online a try!

misstearheus

Aw I love hearing Success-Stories! Never joined a Dating Agency myself, do know of a few that have, and none were impressed, saying it was a waste of money and one felt she had nothing in common at all with the couple of guys she went on dates with.

Would always view a Dating Agency as catering to the needs of people in their 40s/50s/60s, maybe that's not the case at all, maybe that's just my observation of it. Wouldn't 100% rule it out. It would depend on finances and cost, but if I was in my forties and single I might consider it.

Saw on Don't Tell The Bride this week, the Couple getting married apparently met through Facebook?!? Anyone watch it?

Country living

sunshine77 wrote: »

Hi just want to give people heads up on dating agencies - not the online ones. Seemingly can't give the name!! I joined one a year ago after seeing them on tv. They interviewed me for an hour on my likes and dislikes, my personality, jobs etc. my specifics in the gentleman I would like to meet! The deal was 500 euro for 5 very professional dates! They seemingly take all the hard work out of finding Mr. Right. After the date they would contact you and if you and the gentlemen were impressed with each other then your numbers were swapped and you could pause your account for maximum time of three months. But you could unpause at any stage!! All sounds too good to be true.
I took the plunge being 36 and after trying everything else I said why not!!
Unfortunately my first date was horrific. The gentleman was rude, what I had been told about him was all lies. It was the longest hour of my life. I was totally humiliated and had to drive an hour & half back to Dublin after it. I felt our names had been pulled out of a hat and that's how they put us together.
When I rang the company they gave out too me and told me that I was the problem!!
My next date was lovely a gentlemen but unfortunately for me the company never rang me to find out how it went. I finally rang them and they informed me they hadn't realised I had been on a date 2, some excuse about computers been broken down etc etc. they promised they would contact me back immediately once they made contact with the gentleman but still nothing.
What I'm trying to say its a big waste of money and please don't join them. They are extremely unorganised and not a bit helpful or nice. Don't believe the adds.
Hope this is helpful to people thinking about joining. Spend your hard earned cash on something nice. Unfortunately for me I can't get anything back..

Dear madam.
Im Anton Im sorry to hear that you're been going through tough times its the same here we gentleman's are looking hard to find a good hearted person maybe your luck will change for better I hope mine too .
Yours sincerely
Anton Zogaj