Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Plaintiff's sought in class action suit.

Options
  • 22-01-2014 7:50pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭


    We at the law offices of Demented Mind and Soul, are requesting any and all who have suffered at the hands of the vile inhuman St.Jimmy, who notoriously posted this image - warning do not attempt to play
    1i2p47g.jpg

    Hospitals overflowed with broken fingers, I myself am typing with my toes, Damn you Ipad.

    Damages in the amount of 2,198,070,243.82 €uromonies are being sought.

    If you have suffered broken fingers or simply mental anguish, please join our class action suit and we will have justice.


«1

Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    I don't want to be a plaintiff. Can I be a fancytiff instead?


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    I don't want to be a plaintiff. Can I be a fancytiff instead?

    Ok but you will have to do half the work for twice the profit.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    I object.

    On what grounds?

    On the grounds next to Mountjoy Prison. They're quite fruitful this time of year.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    St. Jimmy wrote: »
    What?.

    I have no idea dude.


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    As the defendant, an opportunist and one of the jurors, you should be aware that everything you type will be taken and used as evidence except when the moon is full, alternating even Saturdays AND when the judge is wearing a wig.

    Also if it is convenient would you mind terribly writing up and printing out your summons, renting a courtroom and a team of highly skilled actors to participate in your trial?


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    As the defendant, an opportunist and one of the jurors, you should be aware that everything you type will be taken and used as evidence except when the moon is full, alternating even Saturdays AND when the judge is wearing a wig.

    Also if it is convenient would you mind terribly writing up and printing out your summons, renting a courtroom and a team of highly skilled actors to participate in your trial?

    Can I get Paul Walker?


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    If you can afford zombie walker, go right ahead. Fast and furious testimony welcome.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    If you can afford zombie walker, go right ahead. Fast and furious testimony welcome.

    I don't think it'll be fast ot furious. More slurred and painful to watch.

    Expect it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    On your own head be it, if judge Judy the executioner disapproves of your choice of legal representation.


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,123 ✭✭✭✭Star Lord


    I project!!!


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    On your own head be it, if judge Judy the executioner disapproves of your choice of legal representation.

    Oh hoho, but you are my legal representation my dear. And frankly, i don't give a damn. Neither does Damo.


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,123 ✭✭✭✭Star Lord


    I did give a damn once, but I never got it back, and I don't even remember who I loaned it to any more, so my chances of getting it back are slim at best.

    And you know that Judge Judy doesn't approve of southcentralts, because of that time when she gave him a smack with her legal bits because he wasn't giving money to their friend that gave them money and paid their rent and did all that stuff for them that one time.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    Judge Judy owes me a lot of money from several poker games. She thought she could win on a pair of deuces, but that skang knows nothing.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    Sorry, Judge Reinhold. Not Judge Judy.


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    So I am legal eagle for the defence and the plaintiff's, this May get interesting when I have to cross examine myself- do I go personality by personality or just spin the wheel for each question. And it will get expensive bribing the jurors for both sides - all with broken fingers, I haven't seen them fing in hours.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    So I am legal eagle for the defence and the plaintiff's, this May get interesting when I have to cross examine myself- do I go personality by personality or just spin the wheel for each question. And it will get expensive bribing the jurors for both sides - all with broken fingers, I haven't seen them fing in hours.

    The jurors are cheap and easily persuaded. They do have a terrible cheestring addiction. Give 'em a bundle of them and this case is yours mine.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    By cheestring addiction, I mean viagra dependence.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    I object!


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    St. Jimmy wrote: »
    I object!

    You would!


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    Whore.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    Hoarder in the courtroom!!

    Throw out those magazines


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    But these copies of What Car? magazine from 1985 might be valuable one day.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    I really wish Dappy was in a coma.


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    Chaos in the courtroom, chaos I say, these proceedings are far to orderly. The stenographer is complaining about the lack of iguanas in this case, she says they taste tasty.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    We can't stop here, this is judge country.


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    Expert testimony for the offence.

    " I broke ma fing's causa that damn Jimmi dude, an I broke ma dang ipad too. son o bitch."
    Winston Churchill.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    Your Honour he's badgering the witness!!


  • Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭southcentralts


    We'll see about that, I call the badger to witness this alleged witness badgering.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    Honey-Badger-Dont-Care.jpg


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 30,123 ✭✭✭✭Star Lord


    honey_badger_cares_a_little_journal.jpg?height=460&width=460&padToSquare=true


Advertisement