Lots of people can't cook.

okedoke

I've noticed two things about cooking and my friends that I reckon are very different now compared to when I was a kid.

Firstly among my friends and their partners (generally mid-30's) more guys are enthusiastic cooks than women. Also there seems to be a lot of couples where neither partner can cook (at all).

Maybe this is a banal observation or maybe its not typical of people outside my circle of friends but it seems to me a pretty radical shift from the case when I was a kid where every wife cooked dinner every evening for the family (I'm exaggerating slightly of course).

mike65

Its true and the direct result of getting richer and more busy - two parents working so time strapped - dining from the cooler/freezer cabinets which used to mean bargain basement but now can be quite good, (and watching food porn which essentially means you get to see lots of lovely grub and not have to go to the bother of actually making any).

Gloomtastic!

My Dad could barely make himself a sandwich, let alone anything that involved heating food. My mum used to cook and bake everything from scratch. Both worked full time.

I only know one person who can't/won't cook. Pure male ego/laziness/being let away with it by his wife.

the beer revolu

I think it's a case of lots of people won't cook.
I don't think people were any better at cooking a generation or two ago. Lots of people then had no flair or desire to cook but just got on with it - for most, there wasn't another option. We all know someone from an older generation who can't cook to save their lives but put a dinner on the table every day.

Now, there is so much convenience food available people can get away without even learning to cook the most basic meal.

huskerdu

okedoke wrote: »

I've noticed two things about cooking and my friends that I reckon are very different now compared to when I was a kid.

Firstly among my friends and their partners (generally mid-30's) more guys are enthusiastic cooks than women. Also there seems to be a lot of couples where neither partner can cook (at all).

Maybe this is a banal observation or maybe its not typical of people outside my circle of friends but it seems to me a pretty radical shift from the case when I was a kid where every wife cooked dinner every evening for the family (I'm exaggerating slightly of course).

You are kinda right, as a gross generalisation.

Here are a few ( slightly sarcastic) thoughts on your observations.

When I was growing up, lots of people couldn't cook or hated cooking. Most of them were men, so no-one cared. Some were women, but they were housewives and had no choice but to put a dinner on the table every day for their husbands and kids whether they wanted to or not. Cooking was just another chore.

Maybe these women that are not as enthusiastic about cooking as their partners are making sure that he gets the message that he can't expect the hotel service his Dad got, and he is expected to cook him own dinner.

How many of the couples that you know that cant cook have kids ?

As soon as the harsh reality of parenthood kicks in, they might just find themselves learning how to cook, to save money and to feed their kids properly.

Life is much for fluid for couples these days than a generation ago, and where dinner comes from, is just part of that.

homemadecider

huskerdu wrote: »

Maybe these women that are not as enthusiastic about cooking as their partners are making sure that he gets the message that he can't expect the hotel service his Dad got, and he is expected to cook him own dinner.

Or maybe they just don't like cooking? Lots of people see it as an optional chore - they can avoid it by buying ready-meals or takeaways. I know a guy who is fascinated by my love of food; for him food is just a necessary fuel to get him through the day. He never cooks and I don't think he ever will.

Animord

homemadecider wrote: »

Or maybe they just don't like cooking? Lots of people see it as an optional chore - they can avoid it by buying ready-meals or takeaways. I know a guy who is fascinated by my love of food; for him food is just a necessary fuel to get him through the day. He never cooks and I don't think he ever will.

This is a good point. Cooking is now optional. A generation ago we had Heinz tinned potato salad, tinned vegetable salad and Fray Bentos Steak and Kidney pie and that was about as far at convenience foods went. If someone in the house didn't cook then you went hungry!

Alun

Animord wrote: »

This is a good point. Cooking is now optional. A generation ago we had Heinz tinned potato salad, tinned vegetable salad and Fray Bentos Steak and Kidney pie and that was about as far at convenience foods went. If someone in the house didn't cook then you went hungry!

Don't forget Vesta beef curry, complete with crunchy bits

Animord

Alun wrote: »

Don't forget Vesta beef curry, complete with crunchy bits

I don't think we ever got that. I had a deprived childhood. :mad:

hardCopy

I think it's a combination of fear and laziness.

Some people have never learned to cook and the first steps into cooking can be quite daunting, especially if a recipe calls for something you've never seen before and are afraid to ask for in the supermarket/butcher. You have to just take the plunge and keep practising, and use google when you read about an ingredient you don't know. It doesn't take long to get to the point where you can cook better than a ready meal.

Others are just plain lazy, once you know how to cook the time excuse doesn't really wash, it's just a matter of being organised. Last night it took my girlfriend 2 hours to batch cook 14 dinners for us. That included 6 portions of cottage pie, 4 of lasagne and 4 chicken and veg curries. They're now frozen in take away style boxes, ready for the microwave any time we're stuck.

Malari

hardCopy wrote: »

I think it's a combination of fear and laziness.

Some people have never learned to cook and the first steps into cooking can be quite daunting, especially if a recipe calls for something you've never seen before and are afraid to ask for in the supermarket/butcher. You have to just take the plunge and keep practising, and use google when you read about an ingredient you don't know. It doesn't take long to get to the point where you can cook better than a ready meal.

Others are just plain lazy, once you know how to cook the time excuse doesn't really wash, it's just a matter of being organised. Last night it took my girlfriend 2 hours to batch cook 14 dinners for us. That included 6 portions of cottage pie, 4 of lasagne and 4 chicken and veg curries. They're now frozen in take away style boxes, ready for the microwave any time we're stuck.

I think fear, laziness and disinterest is more like it. Some people, as mentioned, just don't think it's a worthwhile hobby to pursue and would be happy to batch-cook 14 x helpings of plain beef mince. I know people who don't understand why I take hours to prepare one meal when it only takes 20 minutes to eat it. They see it as a waste of time that could be better spent elsewhere.

okedoke

The points about convenience food being higher quality now is a good one.

I'd agree about the kids's - these are all currently childless couples, I'm not sure about my friends with kids but I would guess they've learned.

In saying all this - these non-cooking couples are a minority of my friends, the more common is where the guy is much more into cooking than the girl.

Mr. CooL ICE

I've houseshared with many people and I'm probably the only that was ever capable of putting together a decent meal from scratch.

One of my recent housemates is the type of person who wants to put food in the oven, sit down in front of the TV for 20 minutes and and take the food out and eat it. I gave him a slice of my lasagne before and he loved it so much, he demanded I teach him the recipe. Approx 10 seconds into explaining the recipe, he said "ah fcuk that". Seems like anything more than beef with dolmio jar sauce is too complicated.

Same guy approached me recently looking to use my tomato puree. Conversation went something like this:
"Hey, I'm out of sweet and sour sauce. Any chance I could use this? (holding tube of tomato puree)"
"Sure, work away"
"How much should I use?"
"Well, what are you using it for?"
"To go with chicken"
"It's tomato puree. It's not a sauce. It's an ingredient"
"What do you mean?"
"It's tomato puree. It's pureed tomato. It's just really, really tomatoey. If you put that on chicken by itself, it will taste of nothing but tomato"
"So... what do I do with it?"

When I was growing up, I was never really shown how to cook full meals, but was always helping with preparation, e.g. chopping veg and meat, but before going to college was shown a few simple meals to cook by myself which always involved dolmio stuff. Whatever about not knowing how to cook a full meal from start to finish, having the patience and know-how to prepare stuff from scratch was the best grounding I could have gotten IMO.

Merkin

I think a lot of people can't cook because they simply never saw it at home, they are basically uneducated on very very basic kitchen skills and consequently can't be bothered because they don't know any better - basically Can't Cook, Won't Cook, it's so true!

I'm honestly amazed sometimes by the sh1te that people will eat with very little care or love or attention given to what they put on their plates! I'm not for a moment claiming to be some Michelin starred chef, my knowledge is basic at best but I really really care about where I source food, how it is cooked and lovingly serving it to people I cook for. I honestly don't know in all honesty how someone could prefer student tinned food or ready meals to something fresh which can be prepared for normally a fraction of the cost. It's just weird.

I think schools should probably start teaching basic cookery skills from about the age of 10 on, just to give kids a grounding in nutrition and knowing their way around a kitchen.

Malari

I think sometimes the wording of recipes can put people off too. Having seen someone who won't often cook try to do something from scratch, I was constantly being asked to explain simple terms like "fry the onions over a moderate heat until they start to turn translucent" or having a conniption when the recipe says to add in some spices in Step 3 and add the Worcester sauce in Step 4 and realising that they have done this backwards, not knowing it has no discernible difference whatsoever on the outcome.

If I'm copying a 10 step recipe down for use later, I can usually minimise it to about 3 sentences, as long as it's relatively straight-forward and not an advanced technique. I guess this is because of the basic training I had as a child at home in the kitchen.

dee_mc

Malari wrote: »

I think sometimes the wording of recipes can put people off too. Having seen someone who won't often cook try to do something from scratch, I was constantly being asked to explain simple terms like "fry the onions over a moderate heat until they start to turn translucent" or having a conniption when the recipe says to add in some spices in Step 3 and add the Worcester sauce in Step 4 and realising that they have done this backwards, not knowing it has no discernible difference whatsoever on the outcome.

If I'm copying a 10 step recipe down for use later, I can usually minimise it to about 3 sentences, as long as it's relatively straight-forward and not an advanced technique. I guess this is because of the basic training I had as a child at home in the kitchen.

You're bang on, it's amazing how intimidating what most of us would consider a fairly simple recipe can be to someone who hasn't experimented a bit. I think that's part of the reason why lots of people love watching cookery shows on TV - cooking looks much more accessible and less finicky when you're watching someone that knows what they're doing, rather than reading a recipe!
Personally I find recipes by the likes of Delia Smith really annoying because I always think they go into unnecessary detail, so I wonder would that make them more or less useful for someone with less cooking experience?!

Animord

dee_mc wrote: »

Personally I find recipes by the likes of Delia Smith really annoying because I always think they go into unnecessary detail, so I wonder would that make them more or less useful for someone with less cooking experience?!

Poor Delia! But this is pretty much exactly why she is so popular and really, the whole point of her books. Anyone, with no experience whatsoever can pick up the Cookery Course and she will tell you exactly what to do. It is her target market. And what's more her recipes work which can't be said for all books out there.

dee_mc

Animord wrote: »

Poor Delia! But this is pretty much exactly why she is so popular and really, the whole point of her books. Anyone, with no experience whatsoever can pick up the Cookery Course and she will tell you exactly what to do. It is her target market. And what's more her recipes work which can't be said for all books out there.

Poor Delia is doing fine! I see your point though, in fairness to her, her books explain the real basics of cooking so probably a good place to start.

spurious

dee_mc wrote: »

Poor Delia is doing fine! I see your point though, in fairness to her, her books explain the real basics of cooking so probably a good place to start.

I have a female friend who in all seriousness asked me how to make mashed potato the other day.

Animord

dee_mc wrote: »

Poor Delia is doing fine! I see your point though, in fairness to her, her books explain the real basics of cooking so probably a good place to start.

lol, I s'pose she is doing okay...

I think that if you don't know what you are doing you could do a lot worse than work your way through her stuff. You'd get a decent grounding in the basics.

dee_mc

spurious wrote: »

I have a female friend who in all seriousness asked me how to make mashed potato the other day.

I only mastered mash a couple of years ago! I don't eat potatoes so never took any interest in learning what to do with them, but eventually realised most of the mash I cooked for people was left on plates at the end of a meal...

wmpdd3

I could never cook, I never saw anyone cooking at home, my mum cooked meat and 2 veg every day and I never ate any of it as it all smelt the same.

When I was a student, I just learned how to cook veg, I'd often have a plate of steamed carrots and parsnips for dinner.

Then I started roasting veg and making pasta sauce.

Now I have kids and I had to go get an Annabel Karmel book so I could try feed them. Think cbeebies type cooking!

If there was a remedial class, I'd be in it.

Puzzle35

hardCopy wrote: »

I think it's a combination of fear and laziness.

Some people have never learned to cook and the first steps into cooking can be quite daunting, especially if a recipe calls for something you've never seen before and are afraid to ask for in the supermarket/butcher. You have to just take the plunge and keep practising, and use google when you read about an ingredient you don't know. It doesn't take long to get to the point where you can cook better than a ready meal.

Others are just plain lazy, once you know how to cook the time excuse doesn't really wash, it's just a matter of being organised. Last night it took my girlfriend 2 hours to batch cook 14 dinners for us. That included 6 portions of cottage pie, 4 of lasagne and 4 chicken and veg curries. They're now frozen in take away style boxes, ready for the microwave any time we're stuck.

Had you helped out it might have taken just one hour ;-))

Maximus Alexander

If you've about 4 hours in the evening between the time you get home from work and the time you go to bed, why would you want to spend a chunk of that preparing a meal if you don't have to? I mean, fair enough if you're an enthusiast, but otherwise it's like asking why everyone goes to a mechanic instead of changing their own oil.

Puzzle35

Maximus Alexander wrote: »

If you've about 4 hours in the evening between the time you get home from work and the time you go to bed, why would you want to spend a chunk of that preparing a meal if you don't have to? I mean, fair enough if you're an enthusiast, but otherwise it's like asking why everyone goes to a mechanic instead of changing their own oil.

I agree, but there again if you have a girlfriend to do it for you..........

Maximus Alexander

Puzzle35 wrote: »

I agree, but there again if you have a girlfriend to do it for you..........

As it happens I do! :pac:

The thing is I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to convince her to stop wasting her evening cooking and she won't listen. So I end up having to cook sometimes to stop her - whereas if I lived on my own I wouldn't bother!

Merkin

Just saw this and it reminded me of this thread!

http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/dimly-lit-meals-for-one-1290226-Jan2014/

the beer revolu

Maximus Alexander wrote: »

If you've about 4 hours in the evening between the time you get home from work and the time you go to bed, why would you want to spend a chunk of that preparing a meal

Because it helps me to relax and unwind, gives me pleasure and I end up with a meal I will enjoy eating, is reasonably healthy and I know what's in it.
And my wife thinks I'm great:D:D

Maximus Alexander

the beer revolu wrote: »

Because it helps me to relax and unwind, gives me pleasure and I end up with a meal I will enjoy eating, is reasonably healthy and I know what's in it.
And my wife thinks I'm great:D:D

And it absolutely makes sense for you to do that if it makes you feel good, but for a lot of people it's just a chore that takes time away from the things that give them those feelings.

hardCopy

Puzzle35 wrote: »

Had you helped out it might have taken just one hour ;-))

I'm not allowed in the kitchen mid-week. I own it for the weekend though.

The Hill Billy

wmpdd3 wrote: »

I could never cook, I never saw anyone cooking at home, my mum cooked meat and 2 veg every day and I never ate any of it as it all smelt the same.

When I was a student, I just learned how to cook veg, I'd often have a plate of steamed carrots and parsnips for dinner.

Then I started roasting veg and making pasta sauce.

Now I have kids and I had to go get an Annabel Karmel book so I could try feed them. Think cbeebies type cooking!

If there was a remedial class, I'd be in it.

Hi there! Remember that there's a whole forum of us here if you ever feel the need to ask for a bit of advice.

You should check out our very own Easy Peasy Recipes thread for a start.