Suggestions for an alternative to a Christening

Hello Lady!

As the title suggests I'm looking for ideas for an alternative to a Christian christening ceremony. Neither myself or my husband are religious in a formal way, although we both do believe in God and are quite spiritual. We had a civil ceremony for our wedding.

We would like to have a naming celebration of some sort to welcome our twin girls and mark the occasion with a family celebration. I know we can always just have a party but we would like it to have more significance than just a party.

Have any of you parents done something like this? What did you do? Did you ask a spiritualist or humanist celebrant to officiate or did you just do something less formal? If you used a celebrant was it expensive? Difficult to get a celebrant for a weekend date?

I have a few ideas in mind but don't know how feasible they are.

If any of you have experience of what I am proposing, please share your experiences - I would welcome your advice and feedback.

Thanks

liliq

This is something I wish I'd done for my son.
My husband and myself are agnostic, had civil ceremony for wedding also, but we just never got around to a naming ceremony. I read a few blogs etc about it and there are some gorgeous ideas.
Some people pick 'fairy' godparents (you could use a different name to take the god part out) and they can either say their own piece or you could write something for them about how they'll watch out for the kiddo etc.
You can write something about how you love them, why you chose their name etc.
A little guest book that each of the guests can write welcome notes.

Ginny

We had a welcoming ceremony in the Unitarian church in Stephens green, we got married there too. The welcoming ceremony was lovely, we had any readings we wanted and could structure the ceremony the way we wanted.

lang

We had planned on a naming day at some stage soon after the Little One was born but have still (6 months old) not got around to it. We had a 'gathering' in a hotel in Dublin (where most of my extended family live) a few months after she was born. Basically, we held 'court' in the lobby of a hotel and had friends and family come visit us. So much easier than lugging her all over to see this Uncle and that Aunt.

I have no real desire to have the naming day at all now. Everyone who we would have wanted to see the Little One by this stage has and we have 'announced' her to the world so that box is ticked. We may acknowledge her joining this world in some way on her first birthday. This last six months has been such a rollercoaster in it's own right and I just don't think either myself or my wife could have put up with having to have a celebration. Hoping it'll be more chillaxed on her first birthday?!?!

hedgehog2

Sure I hear the moonies put onba good ceremony,just have the Christening and be done with it.
Its not that big a deal

Hello Lady!

hedgehog2 wrote: »

Sure I hear the moonies put onba good ceremony,just have the Christening and be done with it.
Its not that big a deal

Such a helpful post :rolleyes: why would we undermine a ceremony we have no faith in? Does Christianity mean so little to you that you would prefer for people to make a mockery of it by having ceremonies they have no belief in? I no longer consider myself a Catholic, my husband is not Christian. Why would we have a 'Christening?

Hello Lady!

Ginny wrote: »

We had a welcoming ceremony in the Unitarian church in Stephens green, we got married there too. The welcoming ceremony was lovely, we had any readings we wanted and could structure the ceremony the way we wanted.

Thanks but we don't want a Christian ceremony, a blessing would be okay, but we don't want it in a church or to have any Christian references.

Rachineire

We had a naming day ceremony for our little boy when he was 4 months old. We asked two of our closest friends to be his guide parents and held a small party with our close family and friends in a small reception room in a hotel near us. We were thinking of getting a humanist to officate the ceremony but we said we didn't want it that formal so we prepared something special to say about our son and about the significance of his name/and him in general in our lives and we explained why we chose those particular friends to be our guide parents and thier significance to us. We then asked each guide parent (ahead of time) if they wanted to, to say something as well. They both prepared a speech as well. It was lovely and intimate and very meaningful- and we had yummy cake and finger food afterwards and everyone got to hold the baby!

hedgehog2

Hello Lady! wrote: »

Thanks but we don't want a Christian ceremony, a blessing would be okay, but we don't want it in a church or to have any Christian references.

Sure just go dow the local wishing well then if your this fussy.

Hello Lady!

hedgehog2 wrote: »

Sure just go dow the local wishing well then if your this fussy.

Oh so choosing not to be a hypocrite and not wanting to have a Christian ceremony makes us 'fussy'? Thanks for your really helpful advice. Welcome to modern Ireland - where diversity and difference is respected. Yeah right!

I did not ask for judgments on our preferences but asked for suggestions and advice from people who had done similar. So unless you have something helpful to add to the discussion please take your small minded comments elsewhere. This isn't AH.

Hello Lady!

Rachineire wrote: »

We had a naming day ceremony for our little boy when he was 4 months old. We asked two of our closest friends to be his guide parents and held a small party with our close family and friends in a small reception room in a hotel near us. We were thinking of getting a humanist to officate the ceremony but we said we didn't want it that formal so we prepared something special to say about our son and about the significance of his name/and him in general in our lives and we explained why we chose those particular friends to be our guide parents and thier significance to us. We then asked each guide parent (ahead of time) if they wanted to, to say something as well. They both prepared a speech as well. It was lovely and intimate and very meaningful- and we had yummy cake and finger food afterwards and everyone got to hold the baby!

Sounds lovely and personal Rachineire. Given me some good ideas there.

Ginny

Our welcoming cermony was in the Unitarian church, but it wasnt a Christian ceremony. Like I said it was a welcoming ceremony, we structured the ceremony, picked what was said etc. Same with our Wedding, if you want it religious it can be, but its up to the couple/family. We had readings from Dr. Suess. The only religious aspect was the present from the church and rhat was a book of childrens stories from different religions around the world. I know you dont want it in a church, just wanted to clarify what the welcoming ceremony actually entailed.

January

hedgehog2 wrote: »

Sure just go dow the local wishing well then if your this fussy.

Warned and subsequently infracted for being unhelpful. Do not post in this thread again.

hedgehog2

Sure its just a ceremony relax

Moonbeam

hedgehog is now banned from posting here.

Sweet_pea

I was at a naming ceremony that was similar to Rachineire, in its informality.

We all went camping with grandparents staying a local B and B. No celebrant or anything, just everyone offering up what they can teach/guide the child in the future, from mountain biking to outdoor skills to spiritual guidance. Everyone who came either participated in the entertainment or food.

It's obviously not for everyone but it really suited the parents personalty which I think is the most important thing.

I've not really decided what I'm going to do, the family situation is a bit complected so at this point, sadly, I'm leaning towards doing nothing.

dizzymiss

A few years back, a colleague of mine did a naming ceremony for her twins. Invited their closest friends and family and chose godparents. The decided not to have an officiant. They planted an apple tree for each child in their garden on the day to mark the occasion and had a little party afterwards.

I thought it was a lovely idea and the children will always be able to watch the trees grow and bear fruit.

Hello Lady!

I really like the idea of planting and tree too but our garden is tiny and also we hope to move to a larger house in a year or two - for that to work you need to be in your 'forever' home. But was thinking of planting roses for each of them as roses can be easily taken with us when/if we move.

I think I am leaning towards having an officiant, but a lot will depend on getting one available and cost. Have sent emails to a few humanist ministers and spiritualists so will see what their replies are.

DavyD_83

Hello Lady! wrote: »

I really like the idea of planting and tree too but our garden is tiny and also we hope to move to a larger house in a year or two - for that to work you need to be in your 'forever' home. But was thinking of planting roses for each of them as roses can be easily taken with us when/if we move.

I think I am leaning towards having an officiant, but a lot will depend on getting one available and cost. Have sent emails to a few humanist ministers and spiritualists so will see what their replies are.

you could plant a tree in a park or public place that you will always be able to visit. I don't think there's any laws against it, and if there is i doubt they're enforced.

Hello Lady!

DavyD_83 wrote: »

you could plant a tree in a park or public place that you will always be able to visit. I don't think there's any laws against it, and if there is i doubt they're enforced.

Haha yeah we were actually thinking of that! The place we got married has a rose garden so we are going to make enquiries about maybe planting or sponsoring a new rose in the garden. And if not, well we might just plant a tree in the park next door!

Sweet_pea

I wouldn't plant in a public place without permission as it will be removed at some point.

I always recommend to plant a tree with an interest relevant to the month the child is born but December is a difficult month for that. At least with the roses you can take them with you to your next home.

Hello Lady!

I hear what you are saying, but I could almost guarantee that anything planted wouldn't be removed. It's so huge and as long as what we plant doesn't stick out like a sore thumb I doubt anyone would even notice. That said I would much rather plant something with permission and put a little name plaque on it with their name.

AshAdele

My friend is planning a 6 month party, she is not really giving it a name as a few family members are already made their feeling known about the lack of baptism

John Mason

we are going down the route of a "sip and see" party.

Everyone comes around to the house, on a certain day, sips some tea, sees the baby and goes home. No particular times, very informal.

Hello Lady!

AshAdele wrote: »

My friend is planning a 6 month party, she is not really giving it a name as a few family members are already made their feeling known about the lack of baptism

That would make me all the more determined to have something very non-denominational and make sure objectors know it is NOT a baptism!

Hello Lady!

AshAdele wrote: »

My friend is planning a 6 month party, she is not really giving it a name as a few family members are already made their feeling known about the lack of baptism

That would make me all the more determined to have something very non-denominational and make sure objectors know it is NOT a baptism!