Male cat fighting with female - Cause for Concern?

melon_collie

I have a male and female cat at home. He is 18 months old and she is about 9 months old. Both have been neutered. Anyway over the last 3 weeks or so he seems to be acting more aggressively towards her and I am wondering if this is something I should be concerned about.

What usually happens is he chases her down, grabs her, pins her down and starts to bit her. She usually reacts by trying to get away by and meowing loudly. If I see this happening I shout at him and tap him on the head 2-3 times with my finger. Part of me thinks that he is just playing with her and doesnt realise his own strength because he is much larger than she is. However I have also seen him hissing at her a few times in the last 2 weeks.

On the other side of it they do cuddle up together in the garage and on the couch the odd time. If she is asleep he would sometimes make his way over to her, plonk himself down and rest his head on her body.

I am concerned about this because she is obviously in pain when he bites her and she hides under the stairs if he starts chasing her. I just wouldnt like to see her hurt in any way because she is a lot smaller than he is.

Is this something we should be worried about?

Thanks

Nody

Well for starters stop with the " I shout at him and tap him on the head 2-3 times with my finger" because he'll never get your reference to what you're doing and all you're doing is giving negative feelings and he'll not understand why (cat attention span is not long enough).

Secondly what you need to do is look at the locations it happens; I'm willing to bet it's at locations with only one route in or out (i.e. she can't take an alternate path to avoid him). Also as you note he's likely playing with her (if you don't see blood) and she's telling him to get off. It's normal and part of how cat organize themselves but if you give her ways to escape (routes at various levels to get around the house) she'll also become more confident and have an easier time to escape. If there is only one way out he can easily block it were as if there's three he can't and she can get away when she wants to.

Finally I'd not be overly concerned to be honest; you should take steps to help with escape routes and if you can increase the playtime with to exhaust him that would most likely help but nothing you've shared so far screams "this is going to end up with a cat at the vet". It simply seems the male starts to see her as more then a kitten and is trying to take steps to deal with the new situation.

melon_collie

Nody wrote: »

Well for starters stop with the " I shout at him and tap him on the head 2-3 times with my finger" because he'll never get your reference to what you're doing and all you're doing is giving negative feelings and he'll not understand why (cat attention span is not long enough).

Understood.

It hasn't been happening in areas with only one route in and one route out. For example it happened in the garden last week. he pinned her down on the lawn and she started to screech. I looked up, shouted at him, he let her go, she then ran off and under the car where he couldnt get at her. He ran after her and was at the side of the car swiping his paw in at her trying to reach her.

Nody

melon_collie wrote: »

Understood.

It hasn't been happening in areas with only one route in and one route out. For example it happened in the garden last week. he pinned her down on the lawn and she started to screech. I looked up, shouted at him, he let her go, she then ran off and under the car where he couldnt get at her. He ran after her and was at the side of the car swiping his paw in at her trying to reach her.

Which sounds like play aggression; if you get a laser dot or "da bird" to help exhaust him with that instead you can redirect his energy to the toy rather then your other cat (who needs help with confidence building by the sound of it). Also how and when do you feed them?

melon_collie

I feed them in the morning before I go to work and in the evening when I come home. They are usually fed together, beside each other in separate bowls. It is quite evident that he is the boss because if he finishes before she does, he goes over to her bowl and muscles her out of the way. Not in an aggressive way, he just sticks his head into her bowl and she pulls away. When he finishes I usually give her another spoon of food in her bowl in case she didn't get enough.

Nody

Ok; first of all get a slow eater bowl for him; that will allow you to feed them together but he'll not be able to finish before her (which is the goal to let her eat in peace).

Secondly try to get him into a routine of playtime (5 to 15 min depending on his energy, ideally he should be panting on the floor) and then feeding; this will lead naturally into grooming and going to sleep afterwards.

SillyMangoX

Couldn't agree more about playtime to redirect aggression, my youngest cat is a terror for play fighting with the older boy. I know it's only playing as there is never any blood and claws are usually not out but the older guy screeches the house down (he's a big moaner anyway, if he was actually hurt you'd know all about it) I have basically every cat toy imaginable, and the one thing that always works is the DaBird toy. The second I see Dude staring at Cream I bring out the toy and he goes for that instead - Cream will usually join in too. Then by the time they have 'killed' it they are too tired to fight and will usually curl up beside each other! Even my girl cat who is the laziest cat that ever existed loves that toy!

Nody

Btw, this is da bird knock of version I'd recomend (get multiple as you WILL break them).

SillyMangoX

Nody wrote: »

Btw, this is da bird knock of version I'd recomend (get multiple as you WILL break them).

If only I knew that existed before I got the real one, so much cheaper. I've gone through some amount of refills for the feather part though, they just shred them!

Nody

SillyMangoX wrote: »

If only I knew that existed before I got the real one, so much cheaper. I've gone through some amount of refills for the feather part though, they just shred them!

I did the same thing until I tried this model (it's often going on sale and I've been known to buy 10+ at a time). It is likely to break the arm (weak plastic) or the whole head goes off more so then feathers breaking off though. Both parts can quite easily be substituted in as needed though and our cats love trotting off with their "kill" to a secret hide out (with the plastic arm dangling behind them on the floor) :P

SillyMangoX

Nody wrote: »

our cats love trotting off with their "kill" to a secret hide out (with the plastic arm dangling behind them on the floor) :P

Mine do the exact same thing, have to wrestle it off them if they take off before play time is over :P

OP, here's a video of my guys playing with theirs, you can see just how riled up it gets them. Honestly I didn't believe a feather toy could have such an effect till I saw this one, when you swish it through the air the feathers on the end swivel and it makes the sound of a bird flying. All the jumping really wrecks them!

melon_collie

Thanks everyone who replied. I will definitely get one of those toys and try it out. I'm a bit happier now that I know they are only play fighting and he is not trying to hurt her. I would just hate the thoughts of her being in fear all the time of an attack or being hurt.

Thanks again.

metaoblivia

You've been given a lot of great advice here, OP. I have two cats as well, a boy and girl, 11 and 6 months, and the first thought that came to my mind was play-fighting and with your boy going a bit overboard once in a while. My two play fight all the time, and I know it's just play because their ears are up, their tails are in the air, and there's no growling, hissing or spatting. Once in a while if one of them gets too rough, I'll hear a meow, but then the other lets up immediately and the chase is on again. Once they've tired themselves out, they snuggle together.

If he's getting too aggressive, I'll echo what the others have said - give them both some playtime with a toy. I don't know if you've ever seen "My Cat From Hell," but most of the time Jackson Galaxy recommends playtime with cats to get out that aggression since they have a natural predatory drive and will find something to stalk one way or another.

One of the best things about having two kitties is watching them play fight!
http://www.buzzfeed.com/samimain/maru-and-his-little-sister-play-fight-while-being-adorable

ferretone

Nody wrote: »

Ok; first of all get a slow eater bowl for him; that will allow you to feed them together but he'll not be able to finish before her (which is the goal to let her eat in peace).

Thanks for this, Nody! I'm now ordering the Gobble-Stop for my 8-month-old kitten, as she is the one inclined to do the muscling in on our 3-year-old girl's grub.

We have plenty of the play-fighting, although the kitten figured out how to stand her ground and hold her own at a very young age. They match up pretty well, Kitterton is of course bigger, and fast enough to run rings around Ygritte, but young madam has an ego the size of a football pitch, and has just never allowed herself to be cowed for long.

I'm hoping Kitterton will continue to hold her own, to be honest, as I've a suspicion Ygritte will end up the larger :P I hadn't expected quite such a turn-around: Kitterton used to be a bit of a thug to our older girl who died last year, but then she never really used to stand up for herself. Ah, sure they'll work it out either way, and I can't ever see Kitterton developing a retiring personality, which Siamsa had had all along.

Best of luck, op, I'm sure your pair will work things out fine too, and you've had some great advice from people here.

ETA: Ours are indoor-only, mind you, so I suppose it's a little different, but probably only a matter of degree really.