Inviting friend to a wedding

mfergus

That boyfriend is a prick. Of course he should leave you ride his missus...

Mince Pie

HappyBalance wrote: »

So you think your bf should be able to tell you where you can go?

This made me proper Lol. My boyfriend would never dream of telling me where I can and can't go but he would certainly expect me to tell you where to take your invitation!

Tilly

HappyBalance wrote: »

So you think your bf should be able to tell you where you can go?

It's not as black and white as that.

YOU are asking someone with a partner to join you at a wedding. It's fúcked up because she's only a work mate. Not a best mate from childhood. You want her to meet your family. How are you going to introduce her? “This is Mary, she works with me”. Yeah people aren’t gonna think that’s weird at all. Especially when she tells others who ask her if you two are an item that “No I have a BF at home”.

The One Who Knocks

Bring her sister, that'll teach her!

Liamario

HappyBalance wrote: »

...this girl is a friend who I am not interested in romantically
- previous threads were genuine but they are not about her
...

Hmmmm

Caliden

OP what age are you? I'm guessing under 23


Edit: posting history works out as you being 25

HappyBalance

Caliden wrote: »

OP what age are you? I'm guessing under 23

24 Why?

Mince Pie

HappyBalance wrote: »

24 Why?

Because you sound like you are having a tantrum and throwing your toys out of the pram.

Caliden

HappyBalance wrote: »

24 Why?

Because your naivety to the whole situation would be mind boggling if you were over 25.

FollatonWood

HappyBalance wrote: »

I know some people think I'm a fool and maybe I am but that's why I am here to get the opinions of a wide range of people.

- this girl is a friend who I am not interested in romantically
- previous threads were genuine but they are not about her
- we speak a lot about our families but we will never get to meet them because of geographical reasons
- I thought this would be a nice way for her to meet them (i'm not going to bring her home for the weekend)
- I can see the boyfriends point of view, no doubt about it but my question is that do you think it's right for him to block her doing she wants to do? She does want to go.

If you're not romantically interested in her then why are you so upset about this? Just ask someone else - problem solved.

mfergus

Op. Will you post the following link to the girl you speak of...

http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/birth_family_relationships/problems_in_marriages_and_other_relationships/barring_safety_and_protection_orders.html

cheers

rubadub

FollatonWood wrote: »

That said, she should have made her own decision whether to go or not. I don't buy the 'my boyfriend won't let me go' line, it's not the 1900s.

I doubt she told him about it at all, as it would probably just worry the BF thinking of her in work with a stalker.

mauzo! wrote: »

Don't see the issue, my OH would gladly let me bring a male friend to a wedding if he couldn't make it.

If he couldn't make it then it sounds like you were both invited in the first place, so really the same as this at all. If anybodies OH was OK with what you describe then I expect it would be with a mutal friend of the couple that would be going.

A (still unfair) comparison would be you and your BF being invited to your cousins wedding who he never met, and then not being able to go and you inviting some random lad from work he never met. -this is still unfair as your BF would be less suspicious of him as you made the selection.

Potatoeman

HappyBalance wrote: »

I know some people think I'm a fool and maybe I am but that's why I am here to get the opinions of a wide range of people.

- this girl is a friend who I am not interested in romantically
- previous threads were genuine but they are not about her
- we speak a lot about our families but we will never get to meet them because of geographical reasons
- I thought this would be a nice way for her to meet them (i'm not going to bring her home for the weekend)
- I can see the boyfriends point of view, no doubt about it but my question is that do you think it's right for him to block her doing she wants to do? She does want to go.

Are you not seeing a pattern here? You might want to sit down and have a good long think about this.

moral

If your intentions are not romantic with this girl and you just want her company why not invite her boyfriend as well?

joe316

OP, have you ever met the bf?

If so did you think that he was the devil for stealing your "girl"?

Simon from the Inbetweeners and Carly is how I am imagining you.



Sorry buddy but seriously let it go. The stink of desperation is not only ensuring that you will never get with this girl but you are so besotted with her that no one else can be let in. I'm sure you are a nice guy but I mean it when I say that you are best off letting this one go and moving on. If you have to tell yourself its her loss to make yourself feel better then so be it, trust me you will find your proper "girl" (and one that is yours, sooner than you think) once you do this.

mfergus

Dude, this obsession is going on for over 6 months. This is something your going to have to let go. She has a boyfriend who it appears she's happy with.
Fook off and leave them alone.

Plenty of fish on the sea...
You're wasting your own time...

Bacchus

Guys, these are clearly not the opinions the OP is looking for. Try again.

I am pie

"Blocked her from going" is what you have told yourself has happened. Sure, she might have thought it would be a good laugh, sure she might have wanted to go, but after talking to her OH has decided that her priority is her relationship and not your friendship.

Your 2nd best in a two horse race and a serial fancier of attached women.

My crystal ball predicts bother for you if this pattern keeps up, sooner or later there will be fisticuffs flying in the general direction of your chops.

You're either very naive, or...no..you are very naive.

smelly sock

How do people know it's the same girl? If you read the other two threads carefully I think it's a different bird he's talking about.

Are you just trying to throw the leg over?

HomelessMidge

Sorry OP but you are the one being unreasonable.

She has a boyfriend, she is simply a work mate. You have a tendency to go for women in relationships. You want to introduce her to your family. You scream weirdo!

mfergus

smelly sock wrote: »

How do people know it's the same girl? If you read the other two threads carefully I think it's a different bird he's talking about.

That's even worse!

zl1whqvjs75cdy

Just bring a brass, guaranteed ride.

Triangla

donkeyoaty0099 wrote: »

Just bring a brass, guaranteed ride.

A brass who's going out with somebody might be even better.

GarIT

Inviting somebody of the opposite sex to a wedding can only ever be a date IMO. If it was my girlfriend there is no way I would ever put up with her being in the same room as you again. What you did was wrong, just asking her to go is going way too far. You need to go to her boyfriend and apologise for asking, and hope he doesn't give you what you deserve.

mfergus

Triangla wrote: »

A brass who's going out with somebody might be even better.

Twill definitely turn him on more anyway

zl1whqvjs75cdy

He could pay the brass to go with someone else then try ride her?

orangesoda

I'm going to my sisters wedding on my own in the summer, i just plan to watch the world cup at the bar on my own as i hate weddings

h2005

HappyBalance wrote: »

I know some people think I'm a fool and maybe I am but that's why I am here to get the opinions of a wide range of people.

- this girl is a friend who I am not interested in romantically
- previous threads were genuine but they are not about her
- we speak a lot about our families but we will never get to meet them because of geographical reasons
- I thought this would be a nice way for her to meet them (i'm not going to bring her home for the weekend)
- I can see the boyfriends point of view, no doubt about it but my question is that do you think it's right for him to block her doing she wants to do? She does want to go.

I don`t think you`re a fool I think you`re a creep. Stay out of other peoples relationships.

Soups123

You have an acknowledged history of wanting to 'steal' other peoples girlfriends and you think the BF should 'trust' that your intentions here are all good. Get the boat..........................

You are some buck op, don't be surprised if you get a good kick in the arse from her BF if/when you see him as if I was him its what I'd be doing.

shopaholic01

Tough crowd, OP.

You'll have to shag her in the store room. Get it out of your system and the boyfriend will never know.

lukesmom

Guys like you make me sick! Although they are few and far between. Perving on her at work while she naively thinks you are friends. If I told my other half I was going to a wedding with a man from work he would tell me to pack my bags. creep I wouldn't be surprised if he comes down and kicks the ****e out of you.

GET YOUR OWN GIRLFRIEND!

mfergus

lukesmom wrote: »

Guys like you make me sick! Although they are few and far between. Perving on her at work while she naively thinks you are friends. If I told my other half I was going to a wedding with a man from work he would tell me to pack my bags. creep I wouldn't be surprised if he comes down and kicks the ****e out of you.

GET YOUR OWN GIRLFRIEND!

Christ. Go easy

.Henry Sellers.

Haha OP, I'd say you're in for some bollocking off the boyfriend, you said it yourself that ye are just workmates. If you and her were lifelong friends then maybe but even then the boyfriend would still rightly react the same way.
No fella would be comfortable with his missus going on a night out with a single man, I can guarantee if that boyfriend came home one day and told his girlfriend he wants to go to a wedding with a single woman, he'd get the sh1t kicked out of him by her.
You are seriously lacking basic social skills if you don't realise where you are going wrong and that will come down on you like a ton of bricks, ie the boyfriend hunting you down.

I am pie

This went well OP. Not one person thinks you're creepy.

dj jarvis

iDave wrote: »

Your trying to muscle in on his relationship and he's reacting the same way the vast majority of lads would. She's free to dump him if she doesn't like the 'not dating other lads' policy.

you are dead right , and i bet the BF know this full well , he KNOWS you are sniffing around his GF and is doing what he should do if he values his relationship

if i was him i would give you a smack next time i saw you - dirt bag

and to make it worse YOU know this OP , but come onto AH looking for validation for your slyness - dirtbag !!!

Whatsisname

People like you butting into relationships is what drives me up the wall. I'm with my girlfriend 4 years nearly and the amount of fellas who have tried to cause hassle between us is unbelievable.

Its not your relationship. Its nothing to do with you, stay out of it. Have no idea how you think its alright to ask her.

Put it this way, if you were with her and he asked her to basically be his date at his sisters wedding, how would you react?

Tasden

I dunno op I think people are being a little harsh!

Its a bit weird I guess, but doesn't really warrant some of the replies here.

I went to a wedding with an ex before as his plus one (although I knew the couple through him) he knew I had a partner and my partner knew he had feelings for me but he was fine with it so long as, in his words " don't ride him or any of that **** and come home to me afterwards when you're tipsy and all lovey dovey". As long as everybody knows where they stand and are ok with it then its not a big ordeal like some people seem to think. But in this case everyone isn't ok, either her oh doesn't want her to go, or else she doesn't and is using her boyfriend as an excuse, either way its not ok for everyone so that should be the end of it- no fight, no questioning it, no assuming their relationship isn't right- her partner is within his rights to not be ok with it and she's within her rights to respect that and not go.

iDave

Whatsisname wrote: »

People like you butting into relationships is what drives me up the wall. I'm with my girlfriend 4 years nearly and the amount of fellas who have tried to cause hassle between us is unbelievable.

Glad you said it. 3 and half years for me and the same ****. Lads like the OP are a plague on a lot of young couples trying to make it.

Satriale

not sure if troll, but if i was you, i'd go apologise to the boyfriend before your next thread is,
"how do i remove the holy stone of Clonrichert"

I am pie

Who are the other 8 headers who think it's sound enough to ask another fella's girl to a wedding?

Are you all single?

dj jarvis

iDave wrote: »

Glad you said it. 3 and half years for me and the same ****. Lads like the OP are a plague on a lot of young couples trying to make it.

in fairness , if the girl in question has any doubts about her relationship , then she more than likely will jump ship , just what this OP is hoping, he sounds like the type who is playing a waiting game, rather than something happening organically between the GF and some other bloke - **** like that happens
dont forget , it takes 2 to tango.

but , what the OP described is just calculated home wrecking dressed up as "just friends "

Specialun

OP must be a virgin

Or else smoking some weird ****e

Notorioux

Jeez... how hot is she for you to be this desperate? I kinda do feel sorry for you that you wasted so much time hoping to be with this girl, but this is completely wrong.

HappyBalance

Ok, I think some of your criticism has been a bit harsh but I will take it with a pinch of salt considering the forum.

I have to admit that overwhelming majority think of you I'm out of line. While in my heart of hearts I had no preconceived ideas I can now see the other point of view. My opinions don't mean anything in their relationship. I was thinking of her, I didnt want her to feel trapped. My mam felt trapped in her relationship with my dad and didn't want the same to happen to her. I should just be there for her if she needs me rather than push my opinions onto her. I'm not a bad person but probably a little naive.

Defiler Of The Coffin

Go to the wedding on your own OP, have the craic and the bants and you might even pull a young wan for yourself. Nothing wrong with flying solo if need be. Anymore flutin around with the girl in question and what's left of your dignity will burn in the furnace of the friendzone

ibFoxer

I'm seriously beginning to think the OP's username is a lie. Have read over all threads now and, being honest, your kinda deluded man, even if this isn't the same young wan from the previous thread.

I was 24 once and let me tell you, you only invite a girl to a wedding for one thing. Well, maybe two. I'm sure you're a lovely fella but developing an interest in two girl's in relationships and possibly a third (even if you don't want to admit it) is a bit weird. Plus i'm pretty sure if she wanted to go with you, she just would.


BUT- to answer your actual question- no, it's not exactly correct for her boyfriend to point blank say "no, you are not doing that, i forbid it". However, i'd be sceptical enough if that was, in fact, the case.

I am pie

HappyBalance wrote: »

Ok, I think some of your criticism has been a bit harsh but I will take it with a pinch of salt considering the forum.

I have to admit that overwhelming majority think of you I'm out of line. While in my heart of hearts I had no preconceived ideas I can now see the other point of view. My opinions don't mean anything in their relationship. I was thinking of her, I didnt want her to feel trapped. My mam felt trapped in her relationship with my dad and didn't want the same to happen to her. I should just be there for her if she needs me rather than push my opinions onto her. I'm not a bad person but probably a little naive.

She isn't trapped, she just values her relationship more than your friendship.

893bet

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared 'neath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye?

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance

Holding you, I held everything
For a moment, wasn't I a king?
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey, who's to say? You know I might have changed it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance

LETHAL LADY

OP have you tried calling to her boyfriends home to assure him that your intentions are purely honourable?