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Au Pair Experiences

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  • 04-03-2014 6:00pm
    #1
    highly1111
    Registered Users Posts: 967 ✭✭✭


    Hi

    I am going back to work in September and myself and my husband are considering getting an au pair. We spoke to an agency based in Dun Laoghaire who gave us a lot of information.

    However, I am looking for some information on practical experiences some of you may have had - do's and don'ts and hints and tips to integrate them into the family. Also, how did your children take to them? Did it take long for a relationship to form?

    My children will be 5, 2 and 1. The 5 year old will be in Senior Infants and then the 2 babies will be home all day. My main concern is my 2 year old who is very clingy and the fact that the first few weeks may be tough on him - and therefore tough on the au pair.

    All comments/thoughts and advice welcome!

    Thanks


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    #2
    dockleaf
    Registered Users Posts: 158 ✭✭dockleaf


    Are you both at work full time? If so, I don't think an au pair would suit as they are not supposed to work a full week. They usually work 25 to 35 hours and it tends to work better on the lower end of that scale.

    We've had four au pairs but generally they would have collected our children from school at just before 3 and minded them until we came home from work at 6 ish and that wasn't even five days a week. All of our au pairs worked out very well and we are still in contact with all of them. But that is probably because they enjoyed themselves while with us, weren't expected to work too much, were given respect and therefore gave it in return.

    Make sure your au pair has had actual experience minding children- lots of girls might think they like children but the reality of minding children can be very different. Experience is, to my mind, the first necessity. You can look for a police vetting also from their country and check up on references. If you have a name, look them up on facebook or the likes, it will give you a flavour if you can find them. Always ask if they have any food they don't like or can't eat, its amazing how difficult this can make things in your house. Also I would be slightly against a girl who is leaving her boyfriend behind- it is very hard on them and often they don't settle very well. A few phone calls and also skype or google hangout is no harm.

    As for house rules, set them out very clearly at the beginning, set out the hours and holidays and pay as well, that way no one has different ideas and there won't be a disagreement.

    I have to say we had four really lovely girls and each full year was a great experience. Our children were mad about them and as I said, we are still in touch with all of them. The big drawback is the loss of privacy in your home.


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    #3
    bp
    Registered Users Posts: 1,731 ✭✭✭bp


    Just a few things to add:

    Make sure they English is proficient enough to understand simple instructions - e.g. Take child here please while I do this....this sounds silly but it happens that at the beginning you just get a blank face looking back at you

    Second remember they are there to mind your children not looking after you/ your husband etc....I know a few people who expected light house work done too - this isn't their job so they won't put a load of laundry on or do your dishes - just expectations have to be managed by all parties.

    Also they need to click with your kids too - I know families who have lost theirs because the kids for lack of a better term were brats so they went elsewhere, although the main point is there needs to be a relationship between the kids and the minder

    Oh and first aid would definitely be preferable

    Otherwise positive experiences all round


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    #4
    dockleaf
    Registered Users Posts: 158 ✭✭dockleaf


    Just thought of something else that anyone who has had an au pair will recognise- if you don't already have unlimited broadband, you WILL need it!


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    #5
    highly1111
    Registered Users Posts: 967 ✭✭✭highly1111


    Thanks so much for all of the feedback and advice.

    In relation to their hours - Apparently there are Au Pair Plus hours - http://www.aupairagency.ie/i-need-an-au-pair - and when I spoke to the agency directly they confirmed that they can work up to 40 hours a week. Also, my hours wouldn't be that long because I'm a teacher - but it seems to be the best fit for us.

    Good idea re the boyfriend - it wasn't something I had thought of but makes perfect sense. Also re the food. Thank you.

    The au pair would absolutely be treated with respect (obviously!!) and would be more than welcome and treated as a member of our family. I know that you get what you give in that regard!

    Her English would also need to be good especially since our children are so young and she would have her own space and privacy totally - we've a full attic conversion with ensuite - and all wired for TV/BB etc.

    I think that we'd definitely go the agency route - are there any agencies in particular that anyone would recommend?

    Thanks again


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