14 month old - sleeping issues!

peteb2

Our 14 month old son just won't settle at night. Up until about 3 months ago he used to stay down until from 8pm until 4 or 5 am at which point he would end up in our bed.

He then started in creche and and we also moved from a growbag to a duvet and he stopped sleeping for that length of time and began waking up at about 12 and just not settling. A lot of times he may wake earlier but go down for a while again. So basically he's in our bed from most the night. He tends not to be a pleasant bed-fellow and trashes around turning every-which-way and kicking and crying. And reaching out to make sure someone is there.

Routine is that he goes for a bath around 7.30. Then bottle and into his cot.

He's never been a baby that took to the cot. Always had to be in someones arms to sleep when he was a new-born. Which I'd say hasn't done us any favours.

Any suggestions for a better night sleep are welcome! Although I'll say from the start I'm not happy to let him cry it out.

bp

We personally did controlled crying but at a younger age but i get each to their own.

A family member had a similar issue and over the course of a few weeks they got their 16 month old to fall asleep in their own cot and stay asleep.

They started by having baby fall asleep on a bed beside them (but not cuddling). Then it was sit on the bed with baby in cot right beside them. Then stand at the door so they are still in line of sight. Each step went for a few days.

Great sleeper now. Good luck

aristotle25

I find a routine where there is a good 45 mins of quiet time before the bottle helps. We turn off the tv, pull down blinds etc and just don't play with our guy and he tends to settle down well. I watch videos on youtube on the mobile phone with him for 20 mins and he settles nicely with that. Then he gets the bottle.

Also we found blacked-out blinds in his room helped a lot.

mordeith

I woldn't be too concerned about him waking up as both our guys did that, the 2 year old-still does but goes back to sleep pretty much straghtaway. But the thrashing any crying while asleep would suggest some kind of issue. We took both our guys to a qualified cranio oesteopath and while it didn't turn them into great sleepers it certainly improved their overall well being.
The cranio worked to alleviate areas on the skull which were tender or under pressure from the birth. (1st child vacuum, 2nd child forceps).

How Strange

We did sleep training with our little terrorista, who is almost 1 year, recently. I read the no cry sleep solution book and took her advice. My daughter has woken ever 2 hours to feed since 4 weeks old. By 10 months I'd had enough and knew we had to do something. Firstly, I stopped the night feeds which was quite stressful all round but within 3 nights she got used to it. Then we started lifting her from her cot when she woke, we'd cuddle, sush her and then put her back in the cot. For the first week, we may have done this up to 10 times a night. Exhausting! The second week we'd take her up, sush her and then put her in the cot and rub her back and sush her. Again, we were up and down around 10 times a night. Third week, no lifting out of the cot, straight to back rubbing and sushing. Again up to 10 times a night and we were starting to wonder were we total eejits. The fourth week started with a little back rubbing but then us getting back into bed and saying sush from there. The fourth week ended with her sleeping from 6.30pm to 5am.

She may still wake during the night but I've found that now she can put herself back to sleep. I now rarely intervene if I hear her awake and I'd only reach over to give her a soother if I thought she couldn't find hers.

This method is the longer version which produces the same results as controlled crying, crying it out etc. Both you and your partner need to be committed to it and be prepared for total exhaustion as there will be nights when you get little or no sleep. It doesn't matter if one night you abort the mission, so to speak, and take him into bed out of sheer tiredness. Just start again the next day but its all about consistency so your little lad knows what to expect.

Also, if you're still holding him/rocking him to sleep you need to do this as the bed time routine as well. Thankfully our little lady always liked going to bed so for us that was half the battle. The other half was getting her to settle herself during the night and staying asleep longer.

ariana`

I have a big comfy armchair beside the cot. For as long as i can remember if little one wakes i sit in the chair and sush him from there, i don't pick him up. If i think he's teething then i'll give him some teetha gel on his soother or some nurofen if he still seems very upset but other than that i just let him settle himself but i stay with him until he's settled so that he doesn't feel abandoned. I do remember a few nights where there was some crying but i never let him get awfully upset, when he was younger i'd rub his back or something like that if he was upset, as he got older/more active he'd be standing in the cot so rubbing his back became impossible but by then once he'd know i'm there he'd lie back down & settle very quickly. He's 17mths now and rarely wakes thankfully but when he does the second i sit in the chair he lies back down and i'm usually in & out of his room in 5mins.

Both parents need to be on the same page though, consistency is key with any sleep training method.

I don't think any baby will choose the cot if they think they have a choice of being in someone's arms! It's all just habit and what they get used too but habits can be broken too with perseverence. Co-sleeping works for some and i'm sure it lovely if it does but in my house everyone is happier with a full nights sleep in their own beds. We did similar with our older child and thankfully now broken nights sleep are pretty rare (touch wood).

Best of luck.