Are you tone deaf?

mad muffin

http://tonedeaftest.com

94%


I thought I would be but it seems I'm not.

http://tonedeaftest.com/results?r=P166FD79

The One Who Knocks

100% Yay




Edit: ..Nevermind, I'm not special.

MagicMarker

100%

Not sure how anyone could get any one of those wrong tbh.

Techno_Toaster

Hey op I don't suppose you have a spare f**k I could give?!

Larianne

Techno_Toaster wrote: »

Hey op I don't suppose you have a spare f**k I could give?!

Jeez,
Someone got out on the wrong side of the bed this morning!

mad muffin

Techno_Toaster wrote: »

Hey op I don't suppose you have a spare f**k I could give?!

I do actually. But first. Let's play the fûck off game, you go first

Thundering_Sky

Yay 100%

I play a lot of instruments though so it would be awkward if I found out I was tone deaf :P

The Domonator

100%, there's hope for me yet.

3rdDegree

Techno_Toaster wrote: »

Hey op I don't suppose you have a spare f**k I could give?!

Are you just cranky because you're tone deaf and the rest of us aren't? Or are you just cranky?

fiachraX

Every time I hear about tone deafness, I think of this account which I first read many years ago. Gives a whole new perspective on Einstein.

The Night I Met Einstein - Jerome Weidman

When I was a very young man, just beginning to make my way, I was invited to dine at the home of a distinguished New York philanthropist. After dinner our hostess led us to an enormous drawing room. Other guests were pouring in, and my eyes beheld two unnerving sights: servants were arranging small gilt chairs in long, neat rows; and up front, leaning against the wall, were musical instruments. Apparently I was in for an evening of Chamber music.

I use the phrase “in for” because music meant nothing to me. I am almost tone deaf. Only with great effort can I carry the simplest tune, and serious music was to me no more than an arrangement of noises. So I did what I always did when trapped: I sat down and when the music started I fixed my face in what I hoped was an expression of intelligent appreciation, closed my ears from the inside and submerged myself in my own completely irrelevant thoughts.

After a while, becoming aware that the people around me were applauding, I concluded it was safe to unplug my ears. At once I heard a gentle but surprisingly penetrating voice on my right.

“You are fond of Bach?” the voice said.

I knew as much about Bach as I know about nuclear fission. But I did know one of the most famous faces in the world, with the renowned shock of untidy white hair and the ever-present pipe between the teeth. I was sitting next to Albert Einstein.

“Well,” I said uncomfortably, and hesitated. I had been asked a casual question. All I had to do was be I equally casual in my reply. But I could see from the look in my neighbor’s extraordinary eyes that their owner was not merely going through the perfunctory duties of elementary politeness. Regardless of what value I placed on my part in the verbal exchange, to this man his part in it mattered very much. Above all, I could feel that this was a man to whom you did not tell a lie, however small.

“I don’t know anything about Bach,” I said awkwardly. “I’ve never heard any of his music.”

A look of perplexed astonishment washed across Einstein’s mobile face.

“You have never heard Bach?”

He made it sound as though I had said I’d never taken a bath.

“It isn’t that I don’t want to like Bach,” I replied hastily. “It’s just that I’m tone deaf, or almost tone deaf, and I’ve never really heard anybody’s music.”

A look of concern came into the old man’s face. “Please,” he said abruptly, “You will come with me?”

He stood up and took my arm. I stood up. As he led me across that crowded room I kept my embarrassed glance fixed on the carpet. A rising murmur of puzzled speculation followed us out into the hall. Einstein paid no attention to it.

Resolutely he led me upstairs. He obviously knew the house well. On the floor above he opened the door into a book-lined study, drew me in and shut the door.

“Now,” he said with a small, troubled smile. “You will tell me, please, how long you have felt this way about music?”

“All my life,” I said, feeling awful. “I wish you would go back downstairs and listen, Dr. Einstein. The fact that I don’t enjoy it doesn’t matter.”

He shook his head and scowled, as though I had introduced an irrelevance.

“Tell me, please,” he said. “Is there any kind of music that you do like?”

“Well,” I answered, “I like songs that have words, and the kind of music where I can follow the tune.”

He smiled and nodded, obviously pleased. “You can give me an example, perhaps?”

“Well,” I ventured, “almost anything by Bing Crosby.”

He nodded again, briskly. “Good!”

He went to a corner of the room, opened a phonograph and started pulling out records. I watched him uneasily. At last he beamed. “Ah!” he said.

He put the record on and in a moment the study was filled with the relaxed, lilting strains of Bing Crosby’s “When the Blue of the Night Meets the Gold of the Day.” Einstein beamed at me and kept time with the stem of his pipe. After three or four phrases he stopped the phonograph.

“Now,” he said. “Will you tell me, please, what you have just heard?”

The simplest answer seemed to be to sing the lines. I did just that, trying desperately to stay on tune and keep my voice from cracking. The expression on Einstein’s face was like the sunrise.

“You see!” he cried with delight when I finished. “You do have an ear!”

I mumbled something about this being one of my favorite songs, something I had heard hundreds of times, so that it didn’t really prove anything.

“Nonsense!” said Einstein. “It proves everything! Do you remember your first arithmetic lesson in school? Suppose, at your very first contact with numbers, your teacher had ordered you to work out a problem in, say, long division or fractions. Could you have done so?”

“No, of course not.”

“Precisely!” Einstein made a triumphant wave with his pipestem. “It would have been impossible and you would have reacted in panic. You would have closed your mind to long division and fractions. As a result, because of that one small mistake by your teacher, it is possible your whole life you would be denied the beauty of long division and fractions.”

The pipestem went up and out in another wave.

“But on your first day no teacher would be so foolish. He would start you with elementary things - then, when you had acquired skill with the simplest problems, he would lead you up to long division and to fractions.”

“So it is with music.” Einstein picked up the Bing Crosby record. “This simple, charming little song is like simple addition or subtraction. You have mastered it. Now we go on to something more complicated.”

He found another record and set it going. The golden voice of John McCormack singing “The Trumpeter” filled the room. After a few lines Einstein stopped the record.

“So!” he said. “You will sing that back to me, please?”

I did - with a good deal of self-consciousness but with, for me, a surprising degree of accuracy. Einstein stared at me with a look on his face that I had seen only once before in my life: on the face of my father as he listened to me deliver the valedictory address at my high school graduation.

“Excellent!” Einstein remarked when I finished. “Wonderful! Now this!”

“This” proved to be Caruso in what was to me a completely unrecognizable fragment from “Cavalleria Rusticana.” Nevertheless, I managed to reproduce an approximation of the sounds the famous tenor had made. Einstein beamed his approval.

Caruso was followed by at least a dozen others. I could not shake my feeling of awe over the way this great man, into whose company I had been thrown by chance, was completely preoccupied by what we were doing, as though I were his sole concern.

We came at last to recordings of music without words, which I was instructed to reproduce by humming. When I reached for a high note, Einstein’s mouth opened and his head went back as if to help me attain what seemed unattainable. Evidently I came close enough, for he suddenly turned off the phonograph.

“Now, young man,” he said, putting his arm through mine. “We are ready for Bach!”

As we returned to our seats in the drawing room, the players were tuning up for a new selection. Einstein smiled and gave me a reassuring pat on the knee.

“Just allow yourself to listen,” he whispered. “That is all.”

It wasn’t really all, of course. Without the effort he had just poured out for a total stranger I would never have heard, as I did that night for the first time in my life, Bach’s “Sheep May Safely Graze.” I have heard it many times since. I don’t think I shall ever tire of it. Because I never listen to it alone. I am sitting beside a small, round man with a shock of untidy white hair, a dead pipe clamped between his teeth, and eyes that contain in their extraordinary warmth all the wonder of the world.

When the concert was finished I added my genuine applause to that of the others.

Suddenly our hostess confronted us. “I’m so sorry, Dr. Einstein,” she said with an icy glare at me, “that you missed so much of the performance.”

Einstein and I came hastily to our feet. “I am sorry, too,” he said. “My young friend here and I, however, were engaged in the greatest activity of which man is capable.”

She looked puzzled. “Really?” she said. “And what is that?”

Einstein smiled and put his arm across my shoulders. And he uttered ten words that - for at least one person who is in his endless debt - are his epitaph:

“Opening up yet another fragment of the frontier of beauty.”

SamAK

Techno_Toaster wrote: »

Hey op I don't suppose you have a spare f**k I could give?!

Here's a flying **** you can not give - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ck66ML-ByrM

Stavros Murphy

What?? Speak up ffs.

Archeron

I just took that test while on the bog, so I reckon my neighbours now think the phantom of the opera lives in my shower.

kingchess

got 66% .supprised the hell out of me because people like pointing out to me that I cant even clap in time to music

Peregrine

100%

At least those piano and guitar lessons did something. Even though I can play neither of them now.

Muise...

fiachraX wrote: »

Every time I hear about tone deafness, I think of this account which I first read many years ago. Gives a whole new perspective on Einstein.

TL; Doesn't fit on misattributed pretend-deep meme.

jamo2oo9

80% for me which is probably good for me considering I'm profoundly deaf!

Chucken

Final score: 36/36 = 100%

shopaholic01

86%

TheBody

100% for me.

Micky Dolenz

110%

I00% not tone deaf.

Still can't sing for nuts though.

Arthur Beesley

I am in me Swiss.

The Backwards Man

I got fed up after 6 questions.

I know I would get them all right anyway.

Arthur Beesley

The Backwards Man wrote: »

I got fed up after 6 questions.

I know I would get them all right anyway.

You must have an abundance of patience. I stopped on the third one.

purplepanda

97% :eek:

Didn't use headphones & have the washing machine & oven in the background, plus I have hayfever so am really blocked up :mad:

That's my excuse & I'm sticking with it :pac:

SCOOP 64

94%, surprised , i always have trouble with blocked ears, i couldn't hear a dam thing out of one the test questions ,must be my computer

sopretty

100%

Irish Guitarist

80%. I wonder if I would have scored higher if my laptop had two speakers. I should have tried it with headphones.

sopretty

Irish Guitarist wrote: »

80%. I wonder if I would have scored higher if my laptop had two speakers. I should have tried it with headphones.

How's that old guitar coming along for ya? :pac:

Muise...

sopretty wrote: »

How's that old guitar coming along for ya? :pac:

His guitar, it gently weeps.

mad muffin

The Backwards Man wrote: »

I got fed up after 6 questions.

I know I would get them all right anyway.

Arthur Beesley wrote: »

You must have an abundance of patience. I stopped on the third one.

I should have warned in the OP that the test is as long as fućk

Greenmachine

Another that got bored, part way through.

Yamanoto

Result: Not tone deaf!
Stage A: 12/12
Stage B: 12/12
Stage C: 12/12
Final score: 36/36 = 100%

meoklmrk91

Also got 100%, was thinking I was some kind of special until I read the thread.

Micky Dolenz

Hum me a song and I'll tell you if you're tone deaf.

thimble

I've only known one person who was tone deaf (in primary school with me). If she tried to sing a scale, it was all on a similarish note. She said she couldn't tell the difference, which seemed really odd to the rest of us at the time.

No, and I'm not taking the test

Sir Oxman

Final score: 36/36 = 100%

:pac:

I thought it was going to be a question/answer test, never thought I might need headphones.

I r smrt

Deleted User

Deleted User wrote: »

:pac:

I thought it was going to be a question/answer test, never thought I might need headphones.

I r smrt

1/ are you tone deaf y/n
2/ are you really sure you're not tone deaf
3/ how about just a little bit

Fox_In_Socks

100%. I can't really play musical instruments, but can carry a tune or two.

Lia_lia

Result: Not tone deaf!
Stage A: 12/12
Stage B: 12/12
Stage C: 12/12
Final score: 36/36 = 100%

Congratulations, you are not tone deaf!


Easiest test I've ever taken, yay!

Techno_Toaster

mad muffin wrote: »

I do actually. But first. Let's play the fûck off game, you go first

Lol I joke op! That website crashed my phone twice...now I'll never know what percent I would have gotten

mad muffin

Techno_Toaster wrote: »

Lol I joke op! That website crashed my phone twice...now I'll never know what percent I would have gotten

You must end such jokes with an emoji :pac:

Greenmachine

Okay came back to this as I am waiting for the washing machine to finish before I go to bed.
Result: You are not tone deaf
Stage A 12/12
Stage B 10/12
Stage C 8/12
Final Score 30/36 = 83%
Congratulations you are not tone deaf.
I am genuinely surprised.

Techno_Toaster

mad muffin wrote: »

You must end such jokes with an emoji :pac:

No one told me that but I'll know for next time! Sorry muffin:(

AlanS181824

I certainly hope I'm not... If I am then Karaoke night is ruined!

AlanS181824

AlanS181824 wrote: »

I certainly hope I'm not... If I am then Karaoke night is ruined!

I'm not! Got 100% in the test which probably means nothing but still!

Ghost Buster

100% baby. Perfect pitch

shamrock55

35/36 how the heck did i get 1 wrong